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An amatuer gardener falls through a portal into the lab of a sorcerer. John Hawthorn is the unlucky sort who has to write field guides for the sorcerer at fault in order to gain passage back home. John meets various beings along his way; some with promises to get him back home sooner, some who would rather eat him and some who just want him to go away. He gets to see a lot of the curious strange and beautiful flora of Sirius Orbis. John just wants to get back home to have a real cup of coffee with his girlfriend, but he has to work his way back home.