There was a table in the center of the room. “Most peculiar,” I mused. I gave Screen a pointed look to let it know I was onto it.

  The desk was white and its surface glowed. “Suspicious.” Next I gave it a good sniff. It smelled like table. “Hmm. Intriguing.” I summoned a chair, sat back and considered my options.

  I could touch it. It looked no more or less dangerous than anything else in the room. Something was bound to happen.

  I could try to unsummon it. It had worked with the magnifying glass, so it was definitely possible. But what was the point? It’s not like it was doing anything. I tapped it, just to make sure.

  Oops. Option One it is, then.

  Brown ripples spread from my touch, coating the entire surface of the desk. Then green. Then blue! A kaleidoscope of hues swept what was definitely not a desk, and before my astonished eyes an entire world was born.

  Multiverse #900.000.012 has gained its first World!

  Please name your First World.

  Ah. This was a board game, then. Only the board was alive. And very, very big. The entire border of the desk was ringed with snow capped peaks. In the center was a flat wasteland of snow and ice. It sparkled with savage beauty.

  “How barbaric.” I looked for a spot marked Start, Pass Go, Collect 200.

  Please name your First World.

  For Heaven’s sake.

  “Alcatraz Zero”. This was a prison, after all. And from my humble view, there was zero chance of escape. Hence, Alcatraz Zero.

  “The tarts!” Buried beneath a massive snowdrift peeked a splash of yellow. The scent of lemon wafted from the table. “Oh dear. I hope that’s not going to be a problem.”

  First World named Alcatraz Zero.

  World Traits developed:

  [Wasteland] - Only the hardiest of creatures survive the frigid wastes.

  Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

  [Prison] - None may escape without permission of the Warden.

  [Edible Crust] - A unique Trait. Creatures will find bedrock much easier to digest, among other things.

  I munched on a tart. What kind of game was this anyway? I was a master of parcheesi myself. Ah, parcheesi. What an art.

  The floor shook, and the walls flashed red. I toppled out of my chair.

  WARNING! WARNING! Hostile forces incoming in 10:59...10:58...10:57...

  La! Just started playing, and I was already invaded! The nerve! Then again, it was all terribly exciting. I vowed to swoon when I wasn’t pressed for time.

  An invasion! I’ll sue for peace, it’s what the British did during the Battle of Something-Or-Other. Perhaps the invaders are partial to lemon tarts?

  An invasion, by Jove! Was this sort of things common? If so, I’d need to whip up some defenses, right-quick.

  I decided on the latter option. Worst came to worst, I could offer tarts after decimating enemy forces. I summoned the might of a generation of wuxia fan-fiction and surveyed the battlefield.

  “Status report, Sargeant!”

  “Sargeant Author reporting, sir! We’ve a strong wind blowing over the Craven Peaks, sir! Nothing else to report, sir!”

  “Craven Peaks, Sargeant?”

  “The mountains, sir!”

  “Right. You’re pathetic, Sargeant!”

  “Thank you, sir!”

  Well, it was looking rather bleak. Another tart then, to boost the spirits.

  Scrumptious. Perhaps Screen had insights to offer. To my shock, it did. Quite a bit, in fact.

  Alcatraz Zero (Under siege in 8:32…)

  Species: N/A Traits: 3 Tribes: N/A

  Options:

  Summon Warden

  I pressed Screen further. What did it all mean? What kind of game was I playing? Who was its boss, and did said boss like lemon tarts?

  Screen remained impervious to my subtle bribe. The devious fellow! I was beginning to develop a liking for it.

  Species - Number of Species inhabiting your World. [Further stats locked]

  Traits - Total number of World Traits.

  Current Traits: [Wasteland], [Prison], [Edible Crust]

  Tribes - Total number of Tribes formed by World Species. [Further stats locked]

  And then, there was the cream of the crop.

  Summon Warden - Due to the World Trait: Prison, you are eligible to summon a Warden. A Warden will prevent creatures from exiting the World. Wardens are summoned at current maximum World level.

  “Sargeant Author, report!”

  “Sargeant Author reporting, sir! There’s hope yet, sir!”

  “Bloody good, Sargeant! Bloody good. Now lick my boot!”

  “Yessir! Thank you, sir!”

  6:52...6:51…6:50…

  I summoned a Warden.