Every bus that passed us was full to capacity with people desperate to be inside their homes before curfew. Most of the cafés had already stopped serving food and had their signs switched from “Open” to “Closed.” Thanks to my persuasive nature, the counter worker at the Presidential Pie agreed to make us a pizza and sodas to go.
The scent of spicy sausage and green peppers swirled around Erik as he carried the pizza through the sparsely populated sidewalks. My stomach grumbled and my mouth watered, providing a great distraction from dwelling on the meeting with Anya.
Desmond stood guard duty again, waving one large coffee-colored hand in greeting when we approached. He glanced at the Communicator strapped to his belt.
“Out past curfew again, eh?” he chuckled.
“Food at this place sucks,” Erik replied, holding up the pizza box.
Desmond looked dubious. I didn’t blame him. As far as lies goes, it wasn’t one of Erik’s best. The kitchen at the Hamilton served better food than we were accustomed to.
“Erik doesn’t have a very refined palate,” I explained.
“I’m a simple guy.” Erik shrugged.
It was my turn to look dubious. Of all the adjectives I would use to describe Erik, simple was not among them.
Desmond laughed. “You guys have a good night.” He moved aside to let us pass.
Once back in my room, we spread our dinner out on my bed and ate in silence. I kept sneaking glances at my Communicator, which was blinking urgently to signal that I had a message. I didn’t have to check to know the message was from Mac.
When I’d all but licked the cheese from the pizza box, Erik stood to leave. He’d promised Mac he wouldn’t spend the night in my room and breaking that vow could land him a one-way ticket back to Elite Headquarters, but I didn’t want to be alone. The day had been exhausting and meeting Anya had proven to be a disappointment. Not only was she gorgeous, but she also succeeded in confusing me further. I craved Erik’s reassuring presence and selfishly didn’t care about the consequences.
“Please stay,” I said, careful not to let any manipulation creep into my words.
Erik pursed his lips and his eyes flickered with indecision. He wanted to stay with me just as badly as I wanted him to. He also preferred to stay in the Director’s good graces, or at least as close to it as he ever got.
“Tal, I can’t,” he started to say, but I cut him off.
“Just until I fall asleep,” I urged him. “Please,” I added softly when it looked as though he wasn’t going to relent.
“Just until you fall asleep,” he agreed finally.
I retreated to my bathroom to change into my pajamas and perform my other nighttime rituals. It wasn’t even that late, but I found it hard to keep my eyes from drooping. When I finally came out of the bathroom, Erik was already settled under the golden sheets, and he was shirtless.
Suddenly feeling much more awake, I bounded across the small room and jumped into bed next to him. I curled up against his bare torso, rested my head on the hard planes of his chest, and listened to his steady heartbeat. He wound my curls around the long fingers of one hand while absently stroking my side, underneath my t-shirt, with the other.
His mind was carefully guarded so I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. His reluctance to let me in irritated me. My own thoughts were not so secure and I was projecting my unpleasantness toward him.
“You need to sleep,” he mumbled into my hair. “You’ve had a long day.”
“So have you,” I shot back, my temper flaring at what I perceived to be a patronizing tone in his voice.
“Tals,” Erik said calmly, “just close your eyes. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere for a while.” His voice sounded weary and his patience with my mood swings was wearing thin.
I tried to relax and let the rhythmic feel of his hands on my body lull me to sleep. But my busy mind wouldn’t succumb to slumber. After everything that had happened to me in the past year, I knew worrying about one of Erik’s ex-girlfriends was ridiculous. I knew about Erik’s reputation from the moment we met and it seemed unfair to be upset about Anya when I’d just spent the better part of the past three weeks in the constant company of my own ex. But when I thought about Anya’s perfect hair and large, green eyes, I couldn’t help but be jealous. When I thought about Erik lying with her, touching her the same way he was touching me now, I wanted to throttle her.
Finally, I couldn’t stand it any longer. “Why didn’t you tell her about me?” I tried to sound more curious than accusatory.
Erik’s muscles went rigid and his hand stilled, resting on my hip.
“I did. I introduced you as my girlfriend,” Erik said slowly.
“Yeah, tonight. But she was clearly caught off guard when you told her who I was. Why didn’t you warn her ahead of time?”
Erik sighed and sat up a little straighter. “Do we really have to go over this again? I told you about her. Doesn’t that count for anything?” He folded his hands behind his head. He waited for me to say something, but I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. “Say you trust me, Tal. Say that even though you don’t like it, you accept I’ve been with other people. Or if it will make you feel better, yell at me. Tell me I’m a pig. Do whatever. Just get it out now so we don’t have to keep talking about it.”
“Stay out of my head,” I snapped, pushing against his chest and scooting down the bed.
“All is fair in love and war,” Erik said dryly.
He wasn’t mad, not exactly. More disappointed in me, as though he’d thought I could be more mature about the situation. Suddenly, I was disappointed in me, too. I’d acted like a child in front of Anya. So what that she had him first? I had him now. And I would have him last. Erik loved me. Why couldn’t I let this go?
“Tal, come here.” Erik spoke so quietly, if I didn’t have superior hearing, I might have missed the words.
I stayed where I was. Not because I was upset with him; more out of mortification. Erik must think I’m a head case. Then I started crying. Softly at first, but the harder I tried to hide my tears, the harder I sobbed. Soon I was hiccupping and desperately trying to catch my breath.
Erik reached for me, but I didn’t want his comfort anymore. I wanted to be alone with my embarrassment. I didn’t deserve him. Despite my feeble attempts to shove him away, Erik wrapped his arms around me, crushing our bodies together. The harder I struggled, the tighter he squeezed me.
“You’re going to get through this. We are going to get through this,” Erik told me. “I know you are upset about Anya. I get that. But that’s not why you are acting like this. Jealousy isn’t really your thing. After what happened with Donavon, I am surprised you trust me at all. But if you have a flaw, it is that you are too trusting. You want to believe the best of people, and you have trusted too many who have let you down. So let’s talk about what’s really bothering you.”
What was he talking about? What wasn’t bothering me? My health was failing. My future was uncertain. My best friend was dead, executed by the closest thing I had to a father. And now I learn that same man has been giving me an experimental drug that is supposed to dampen my abilities. What was going right in my life?
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Erik said nothing, telepathic or otherwise. I figured he’d taken my warning to get out of my head seriously.
“I’m sorry, Erik,” I told him. “I’m just frustrated. I didn’t mean to take it out on you. I promise, no more getting worked up about other girls.”
Erik knew I wasn’t telling him everything, but he didn’t push me, a fact for which I was grateful. We settled back under the covers and I fell asleep almost instantly.
Erik was gone when I woke up the next morning. A slight indent still remained in the soft pillow where his head had laid the night before. I grinned broadly, remembering the feel of Erik’s arms around me. It took me a couple of moments to sink in that I had to live through another day of exhausting aptitude testing. But as bad as I felt for myself, I felt worse for the scared children that would be brought before me and Erik for us to decide their fate and even worse for the parents who would only see their children for several days a year.
I padded my way across the plush carpeting, collecting a clean pair of black dress pants and a tight, black dress shirt from the closet. I had yet to listen to my messages and was a little surprised that Mac wasn’t pounding on my door at that very moment. I was prepared, though. I would feed Mac the same excuse Erik gave Desmond the night before. Mac would be annoyed, but hopefully placated.
After I’d adequately masked the dark circles underneath my eyes with liberal amounts of concealer, I set off for breakfast alone. I detoured past Erik’s room, but my knock went unanswered. I guess he’s already down there, I thought to myself. His failure to wait for me before leaving his room irritated me slightly, but in light of the previous night’s conversation, I made a valiant effort to keep my emotions neutral. And I was doing a fairly good job until I walked into the crowded room and saw him sitting at a table with Cadence. Her normally pinched face was relaxed and she was actually smiling as they conversed. I gritted my teeth and bee-lined for their table without bothering to fill a plate with the juicy bacon and buttery eggs I could smell on the buffet line.
Like yesterday, Erik felt my presence before I’d made it across the room. He looked up, searching for me. And when our eyes met, he gave me one of his heart-stopping smiles and I relaxed. Conscious of the frantic way I was winding through the white-clothed tables, I forced my feet to a slower pace.
“Morning, Tals,” Erik said, standing as I approached. He planted a soft kiss on my cheek before pulling out the chair next to him.
“Hey,” I said quietly, taking my seat. “Good morning, Cadence,” I greeted her with the friendliest voice I could manage.
“Talia.” She nodded. The smile she’d worn while talking to Erik was gone, but her tone held none of the hostility that was her norm when addressing me.
“Aren’t you hungry?” Erik asked, noticing my lack of food.
“Oh, yeah, I guess,” I replied, embarrassed to admit I’d bypassed the buffet in my eagerness to interrupt him and Cadence.
“What do you want? I’ll go get it,” he offered, smoothing my curls away from my face.
“Surprise me,” I muttered, further regretting my brief moment of irritation.
Erik nodded and left his own half-finished meal on the table and went to get me breakfast.
Once he was gone, I was acutely aware of the cloud of awkwardness casting a shadow over the table. For lack of something better to do, I picked at Erik’s half-eaten oyster omelet and pile of bright-red grapes. Cadence noisily slurped chunky cottage cheese from her spoon, scrutinizing me with her beady eyes.
“I’ve asked Erik to train with me for my Hunters’ tryouts. They’re after the culmination of the aptitude testing,” she said needlessly. Her eyes remained trained on my face, gauging my reaction.
I kept my expression impassive. “Well, there’s nobody better. He’s a great fighter,” I said proudly.
“I know,” she said matter-of-factly. “That’s why I asked him. As much as I’d like to think I don’t need help, I obviously do.” She hesitated before continuing. “He suggested I ask you, as well. He seems to think your unique talents would be beneficial.” Cadence set her spoon on her plate and swallowed nervously.
“You want my help?” I asked slowly, not believing that this girl, who’d gone out of her way to be difficult with me, was actually asking for a favor.
Cadence bobbed her small head up and down, her black hair bouncing around her heart-shaped face.
After being subjected to months of her contrary nature, I wanted to give her a snappy retort, but the distraction the physical exertion would provide me was too tempting.
“Yes. I trust you of all people know how it feels to be denied something you want so badly. I’m willing to do anything, since the Placement Committee agreed to grant me another tryout,” she replied evenly.
I was still on the fence. Helping Cadence could be the olive branch that would make the next three weeks bearable. Refusing her would likely increase the hostility and make hell on earth a reality.
“I would be happy to practice with you,” I replied honestly, mustering a small smile for her.
Happy might have been an exaggeration. But saying, “Anything to make you less bitchy,” didn’t seem like the best way to start off our new-found friendship.
“Thank you, Talia. I really appreciate it,” she said.
Before the moment could get any more touchy-feely, Erik reappeared and set cheesy eggs mixed with mushroom, onions, and chives wrapped in a spinach tortilla in front of me. Then he handed me a huge glass of neon-pink watermelon juice.
“You’re the best,” I said.
Erik beamed and slid into his chair. “I aim to please.”
I dug into my breakfast, suddenly ravenous. Erik and Cadence chatted about mutual friends and favorite city shops while I consumed everything on my plate.
When I was so full that I was grateful my pants had been purchased before my weight loss, I folded my napkin over the crumbles that remained on the china plate. I swallowed the last dregs of my juice and declared I was ready to face the day.
We began our busy day of administering the tests with much less animosity than the previous one. Cadence and I had reached an unspoken understanding at breakfast. She still disliked me, but she needed my help and if being civil was what it took, she was willing to do so. For my part, I was just thankful to be able to relax in her presence. Normally, I felt guarded and tense whenever she was around. But her attempts at politeness were going a long way toward putting me at ease. We’d never be friends, but the constant vigilance I’d been exercising around her was exhausting and I was grateful for the amnesty.
Back at the hotel, Erik and I parted ways with Cadence with the understanding that we’d meet back up after dinner. Cadence was eager to hit the Hamilton’s underground gym, but I needed to take my medicine and Erik insisted that I rest my mental abilities first.
“It was really nice of you to agree to practice with her,” Erik said as we lounged on my bed waiting for room service to deliver the bison meatloaf and onion strings we’d ordered.
“I figured if she could swallow her pride enough to ask, the least I could do was agree,” I replied, moving my head so that I could hear the soothing sound of his heart beating against his ribs.
Erik laughed and I felt his stomach muscles ripple underneath me. “The physical exercise will help you sleep better,” he said.
“I’d sleep better with you holding me. Maybe I’ll suggest that to Mac.” I tapped a finger against my chin thoughtfully as though this was some brilliant new idea I’d just come up with.
I was joking, of course. We both knew Mac would never agree to let Erik stay with me.
“Don’t,” Erik warned, clearly not finding me funny. “I don’t want to rock the boat, particularly right now.” His mental voice was serious and disturbed.
I hated the strain being involved with me caused.
Flipping over onto my stomach, I crawled up the length of his body and kissed him lightly on the lips. At first, Erik didn’t reciprocate and I worried my joke had seriously upset him. I kissed him again and felt his mouth twitch against mine. I fed off the slight reaction and straddled his waist, kissing his neck until he couldn’t resist me any longer.
Erik grabbed my hips hard before slipping his hands underneath my tight shirt. His fingers traced the scar tissue marring the skin above my left hip, sending an odd rush of sensation through me. I found his lips again and this time, he kissed me back with so much intensity that my toes curled.
Electricity crackled between us as Erik’s hands ran up and down my sides, his thumbs passing lightly over my stomach, causing my abdominal muscles to clench. My thighs tightened around his waist, sending his thoughts into dangerously graphic territory. I saw the way I looked through Erik’s eyes; beautiful and strong, not at all like the tired and broken-looking reflection that stared back at me in the mirror. I felt the rush of love and intense desire that burned inside of him. It overwhelmed me and I was overcome with the urge to cry tears of joy.
“Erik,” I whispered his name against his lips. “I—” But I didn’t get to finish the sentence because just then, someone knocked on my door.
My shirt was askew and I could only imagine the disheveled state of my hair when I irritably greeted the immaculately dressed delivery boy. His knowing smirk assured me that my flushed face and my hasty, breathless “thank you” hadn’t gone unnoticed. The boy averted his hazel eyes as he wheeled the cart of food through the doorway.
“Thanks, man,” Erik called from the bed, unashamedly readjusting his own rumpled shirt and the crotch of his khakis.
After the waiter had left, I removed the shiny metal lids from the plethora of dishes that decorated the cart and set the table for our nightly meal. The rich smell of meat and spicy tomato sauce filled the room and I inhaled deeply as my stomach rumbled and my mouth watered.
The food tasted as good as it smelled, but my eyes kept shifting involuntarily toward the mussed golden comforter. The meatloaf was satiating one hunger, but the more primal desire to touch and be touched was left unsatisfied.
“We have forever, Tal,” Erik promised, covering my hand with his own.
“Forever,” I agreed, loving the way the word sounded when I said it aloud.