The downpour started within minutes of leaving the messenger main station and the visibility dropped to ten feet in all directions. GB was miserable. I was miserable. The rain also made it difficult to talk, so we all were in our own little worlds.

  It cleared up after fifteen minutes and I let out a sigh of relief. This was going to be a better day. I knew it. The sky hadn’t cleared up, but it was brighter. I looked over the pass, not quiet to the edge of the slope. It was beautiful up here, despite the wet.

  The captain rode up next to Juan and I. “General, if you approve, I’d like to send out some scouts to look ahead. My gut’s telling me to be cautious. And I’ll be damned if it hasn’t gotten me out of some tough scrapes.”

  “Rebecca, we’ve known each other for how many years? You can still call me Juan,” he replied.

  “Of course. Scouts?” she asked.

  “Go ahead. You don’t need my permission to send out scouts.”

  “Thank you, General!” She turned in her saddle and yelled out. “Menendez, Krin, Em, Knockers. Get out there and find some trouble!”

  For soldiers broke away from the group at a gallop, ranging out and ahead. Harper and Jerseil rode up next to me as we rode toward the point where one could look down the slope.

  “What’s going on, Finn?” asked Harper.

  “Captain Rebecca had some of her people scout ahead. Kind of sounds like a good practice,” I replied thoughtfully. I watched the scouts go over the edge, and the trick of perspective made them just seem to disappear.

  Rebecca snorted. “I have the soldiers, Mage. Privilege of numbers. God knows there could be 20 Brask coming up the hill. Knowing they’re there gives us an advantage.”

  Thunder boomed in the sky above us as the scouts came riding back like there were 50 hungry brask right behind them. There was a flash to the north of us and the crash of displaced air drowned out whatever Rebecca yelled. The scouts preceded a veritable horde of mercenaries, banners of the Steel Falcons flapping above them.

  “Oh Fuck!” I yelled as Juan wheeled his horse about.

  “To the old ridge trail!” he boomed, his voice carrying easily as he rode back the way we came, angling toward the south. I chanced a look over my shoulder as I followed him, seeing wave after wave of mercenaries top the slope and ride after us.

  “Fuck, fuckity fuck!” I cursed while GB’s muscles bunched and shot out, moving faster than I had seen her do since we ran from the Brask. That was ages ago, and I was grateful for her more than I had been then. The gentle slope made it easier for our horses to run and I saw groups of four peeling off from us and emptying bags of something behind and to the sides of our column of riders. “What was that?” I yelled to one of them as they caught up.

  “Caltrops! Spiky balls of metal that will lame their horses and cause a fucking pile up!” the woman replied with a nasty smile. She rode on and we closed in on the gap I hadn’t noticed in the rain. It reminded me of an alleyway between two buildings, only it was between two craggy bits of the mountain that looked almost like they were ripped away from each other.

  Thunder rolled, and the sky pissed on us again as we entered the gap. More caltrops were dropped as we rode on, our column shrinking as the gap narrowed. Part of me felt bad about the mercenary’s’ horses, as they would likely abandon the ones that were lamed. But as long as we could get away, we had a chance.

  The soldiers of the 303rd set other traps as we continued through the narrow gap. It widened out, and we slowed to walk the horses. The rain had slowed a bit, and the thunder was mostly to the north. The rocky walls were dark with the rain and everything dripped.

  I caught up to Juan. “Juan, what’s the plan? Will this take us back down so we can cross the chasm?”

  “Not quite, boy. Remember that bridge over the mountain part of the chasm? The bridge of Ankana’Zuul. On the other side of that is a path down the mountains that should take us in the right direction. It’s going to be a hard crossing and a long path to the caverns.”

  “A long path? What do you mean?”

  “Finn, the horses can’t cross the bridge. We’ll have to leave them behind.”

  “Fuck me, Juan. I don’t want to leave GB behind. She’s a good horse. How bad could it be?”

  “Ever seen a rope bridge? The best ones have a walking area made up of hundreds of ropes woven or twisted together. The Bridge of Ankana’Zuul is woven of thousands. Rope footing is not good for horses, though, as it moves and does not give stable footing. We can hold on to the guide ropes. They can’t.”

  I dropped back. The idea of leaving GB behind was disturbing to me. She had carried me through three kingdoms and across a mountain range. She had fought to protect me and had grown affectionate. Hell, my daily routine involved taking care of her in the mornings and rubbing her down in the evenings. I didn’t like it one bit.

  But if it was a price I had to pay to get the way home opened, then it was one bill that I would pay in full. I scratched her mane in a way she liked while I thought. It was still damp and I’m sure that I smelled of wet horse. The rain was still coming down lightly, and Juan called for a rest stop. I dismounted and checked her legs. Harper had explained that horses can get shin splints and other injuries from riding over rough terrain. Last thing I wanted was for her to be in pain or get an infection. GB chewed on my hood while I checked her front legs and let go when I chided her. All four of her legs and hoofs seemed fine to me.

  My check didn’t take long, and I stretched. Though I was used to being in the saddle for days on end, that gallop was hard on both of us. While stretching, I noticed Harper talking with the bubbly captain of the 303rd Chinchillas and Juan before taking off back the way we came. I walked over to Juan and Rebecca. “What’s Harper up to?”

  Rebecca gave me the side eye, but Juan had no trouble explaining. “We sent her back to check on the progress of the Steel Falcons. I’d like to rest the horses as long as possible before moving on, but we need to know how much time we’ll have.”

  “You don’t think they’ll stop for a while themselves? I mean, come on. If they lame all their horses chasing us, we can travel easy for most of the way.”

  Juan looked at me, baffled for a moment, before smiling. “I forgot for a moment that you aren’t the martial type. Or into strategy games. They’ll have to clear the area of caltrops before moving the horses through. There are a few ways to do this that take care of most of them. Rolling logs, lodestones, summons, to name a few.”

  “And they’ll have to deal with the IEDs and other traps we left for them while doing that,” added Rebecca. “A lot of those bastards are going to die, but it ain’t going to be enough. Best we can do is whittle them down while slowing their progress. It’s still going to be a grade-A shitshow when they get through.”

  “So, what can I do to help? I hate that it’s me they’re after, and I need to do something.”

  Rebecca grinned, reached up, and patted me on the shoulder. “Mage, you’re the maguffin. Our goal is to keep you out of the enemy’s hands. You are the only mage on this planet, and everyone wants you. You should feel special. Let us do our job. We’re certified fucking professionals on two worlds! So don’t worry your pretty little head about it and let your aunt Rebecca take care of everything.” With that, she turned and walked away.

  “God damn it Juan, how do you find these people?”

  ****************************

  “So wait. You are telling me you don’t have to go to a movie theater anymore?” Seargent Twinkle toes asked. The burly man was tall, bald, with blue skin and a prodigious beard. The beard had braids and various beads woven through it. He had approached me to ask about the movie scene, missing the total theater experience.

  “Yeah, you can just stream them on your TV or phone. The pandemic also made it hard for a lot of movie theaters to stay open,” I replied.

  “What the ever-living fuck are you talking about? Pandemic?”

  “Yeah, too many governments didn’t handle their shit and even if they had, it didn’t matter at first because it was a novel disease. It was worse in the US, because there was misinformation and conspiracy theories being pushed big time. Over 4 million people died, and that was the ones that were counted. No one wants to talk about the fact that the data on casualties is flawed. It became totally politicized and then it was glossed over. The fascist takeover wiped all the relevant information.”

  The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.

  “The U S of Fucking A is a fascist country now? Damn. I thought we beat the nazis.”

  “God no, it just lasted one term. During the midterms, Americans flooded the polls and voted all the fascists and weak politicians out. And any who got through that were voted out with the party. That party basically fell apart. We now have five big parties.”

  “Wow, man. That’s just… well, I don’t fucking know. That’s so, like, 1984.”

  “We good? A deal’s a deal. Why the flying fuck are you called ‘Twinkle Toes?’” I asked.

  The sergeant took a drink from his canteen and grinned. “Well, it had to do with this engagement in Venezuela. I had slept with this widow in a village we had liberated and—”

  Harper interrupted us by galloping into our temporary camp. “They have a summoner! We have maybe twenty minutes!”

  “Mount up in five!” ordered Captain Rebecca.

  We moved out quickly. As the gap opened up into a valley, the amount of trees increased to the point where we were compressed into a thin column once again. The path wasn’t very wide, which gave me some hope that the pursuing mercenaries would get slowed down by the bottleneck. It also seemed like it would be great for an ambush, but even with the experienced and high-level troops we had, it didn’t matter whether it was all of us or a small group. It would be a suicide mission.

  The light rain and surrounding woods weirdly muffled the sounds of the horse’s hooves on dirt and stone. The wind whispered loudly through the pines all around us, spraying drops from the needles in a constant fan of mist. GB’s breath fogged the air around her as the temperature continued to drop.

  I hoped it wouldn’t snow, but it was like Murphy’s law: if the weather in the mountains can get worse, it will. The path’s incline noticeably increased upwards, making the possibility of snow almost a certainty. Sure enough, the light rain gradually turned into snow as we rode on. The day darkened with the increasing snow, and visibility dropped. Trees became fewer as we climbed higher. Our progress slowed to a crawl as we waited for the scouts to verify the path ahead of us was safe.

  It was impossible to know what time of day it was, but it had to be close to evening. The cold overwhelmed whatever resistance my poncho had, and I shivered, lowering myself in my saddle closer to GB for warmth. Visions of freezing into a meat-popsicle danced in my head. I could barely see the horse and rider ahead of me. In all honesty, I was depending on my horse’s senses in the mess of white and cold.

  We eventually made it through the blizzard, and the snow let up as the trail went down again, turning back into rain. Which was good, considering the path quickly became a switchback down the now steep hill. With the better visibility, two things became obvious to me. Our force seemed smaller, and we were going down into a massive valley. Still, I was soaked to the bone and wanted to have a chance to dry off.

  The valley was a long one and I couldn’t see the other side of it. I saw vast swaths of forest, and a very straight road. When we got down the switchbacks and onto the road, there was enough light to see that it was made of tightly fit stone. There were spots where the stone pieces had been pushed up by roots of old-growth trees. This has been here a long time, I thought. If there were ruins, this would be just perfect. We stopped to rest the horses and ourselves.

  Juan called out to me, and I walked over to join him, Harper, Captain Rebecca, and one of her two lieutenants. The old man had a grim cast to his face in the low light as he took in the small group.

  “I was hoping we wouldn’t have to go this way, but always saw it as a backup. This valley will be the hardest part of the entire trek. There are nasty things in the woods and ruins that will do their best to make our lives hell. All of them will be deadly to Finn here, so he’s going to be placed in the middle of our group. It is likely that as soon as we go at least a hundred feet, we will begin a gauntlet of constant attack. It will slow us down, and we are going to have to pay special attention to the trees above us, as things will drop down upon us.”

  “With half the force hiding out before the snow, we are lower in strength. They will hopefully be able to make the enemy’s lives miserable. But everyone here is going to need to be doing the work of two. Just as a precaution, if anyone has an excess of healing potions, please give them to Finn. Since he’s still level 9, and we need him for this quest, he is the most important person here. Am I understood?”

  The chorus of ‘yes, general’ was pretty loud, and I realized everyone had crowded in. Four people started handing me health potions, 10 each. 40 health potions? I was rich! I had an image of a greedy little man with a top hat and a long mustache rubbing his hands together.

  We took another half hour to rest before entering the forest and the ruins within. The entire area was overgrown with trees thick with age. Vines intertwined with the branches hanging down to the forest floor. Did I mention it was hot? We had gone from a cold and wet temperate area to a rainforest jungle in ten feet.

  The air was damp and stuffy, and I could feel myself sweat. It wasn’t the heat, which hadn’t gotten through the soaked-to-the-bone chill I had gotten from the constant rain, then snow, then more rain. It was the feeling of a thousand eyes looking right at me. The feeling that I was what they wanted. And what they wanted was terrifying. I could almost hear their whispers.

  Jerseil grabbed my arm. “Come on, buddy. Don’t listen to them. Don’t let them in your head. They are bottom feeders and can’t promise you anything. Stay with me,” he hissed-whispered. When I nodded to him, he gave me a reassuring squeeze. “We can do this, Finn. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

  I looked at his level, which surprisingly I hadn’t yet. Jerseil was a level 55 Bard Enforcer, whatever that was. But he mixed in with the other four higher-level people around me. Seargent Twinkle Toes was a level 52 Berserker. Private Misty, a lizard looking woman, was a level 39 Wizard Definer. It said her race was Kobold. Then there was a Goblin named Corporal Crabs, for some reason, and he was a level 52 Warlock.

  And finally, there was Seargent Jeb. He was a bear-thing. A big fucking bear thing. Somewhere between a grizzly and a sasquatch. He was a level 45 Inverted Druid, which immediately made me think of those guys or gals at the party that were dragged there by their friends, just trying to get them out of the house. You know the ones that try to avoid talking to anyone and stand or sit in the corner? Super awkward and say weird stuff after a few drinks? Yeah. He wasn’t like that at all.

  And I was in the middle of this fortress of weirdness, that were there to keep me safe, as a level 9 Mage. I was that kid covered with all kinds of coats and sweaters to keep them warm. And I was okay with it.

  Something in the trees rustled through the leaves. A lot of things. I caught a glimpse of what looked like squirrels. “Squirrels!”

  Seargent Jeb looked up and swore. “Fucking Leaf Runners!”

  Vines sprouted from his arms and formed into a domed shield. Just before a fuck-ton of small, stone-like objects thudded and tap-tap-tapped against it.

  But they weren’t just targeting me, they were going after everyone. I saw magic and actual shields thrown up by members of the Chinchillas protecting themselves and those around them. I tried out my level 2 Poisonous Shot on these things. Aiming around the shield, I shot ten bolts at a mass of green and brown camouflaged squirrel bastards. The bolts were bigger than before and seemed to pick targets before zipping off at mach one!

  “Fuck yes!” I cried, watching them hit their targets with enough force to knock them off of their branches. The tiny screams were reminiscent of that Christmas CD my mom liked to play every year. I almost laughed at how humorous it sounded. Once they hit the ground, they were finished off quick. I fired off another twenty and was immediately grabbed by Jerseil and pulled back before a dart hit me. The little green dart whiffed past through the area my head had been.

  “Thanks!” I said to him.

  “Those things have a paralytic on them! Don’t be so quick to put your low-level ass at risk!” he snapped at me. I saw the worry and anger warring in his facial expression as more squirrely motherfuckers fell and their high-pitched cries filled the air. I couldn’t help myself and I laughed.

  “I’m sorry, those things sound so funny.” I said.

  Jerseil tightened his grip on my arm. “You sure you haven’t gone bad? Never mind. Just stay under the shield as everyone else deals with these creatures.”

  It didn’t take long for the rest of the Leaf Runners to be dealt with. After looting, we moved on. The experience energy I got from ‘assisting’ was enough to get me up to level ten. The arboreal bastards had been level 35 to level 40, so it was just enough. As we rode on and it got darker, I leveled up to 10. I had an extra 3 points to distribute now. I didn’t know if it was a onetime thing and I wouldn’t know until the next level. It was kind of exciting. I ended up putting a point into endurance, raising it to 20. This kicked my health up to 245! This was a nice jump.

  I went ahead and dropped the other two points into intelligence and wisdom, increasing them to 32 and 30. My mana points went up to 212. Still wanted to put more points into strength, but I was beginning to understand that my thing was magic, and I needed to focus on making myself into a bad ass in that area before even focusing on my ability to punch people. Or carry more stuff. I wasn’t anywhere near my weight limit, so that could wait.

  The ruined buildings became more numerous as we went deeper into the jungle. Oddly, the road was clear of most obstructions, like vines or fallen trees. I suddenly had an ominous feeling that something was keeping the road clear. I still felt eyes on me and the murmurs trying to get my attention were still there. It was slightly softer, though. Thank goodness for the little things.

  I was about to ask Misty what her class was about when a high-pitched screech came out of the jungle to our right. “What was that?” I asked. An answering shriek came from our left. “Oh, okay. Thanks for the clarification”

  No one answered me as two things came crashing through the jungle toward our group.

  The first one crashed onto the road, its eerily glowing eyes glaring at us. The thing was humanoid, but at least twelve feet tall. Its skin was bumpy and fissured, looking more like tree bark than skin. It roared when it spotted me and started lumbering towards me and my defenders.

  “What the fuck is that thing?” I asked loudly as GB snorted and took a step back.

  “It’s a forest troll, but… there’s something wrong with its eyes,” replied Misty.

  “A troll? How do we kill it?”

  The goblin warlock, corporal Crabs, giggled in a very disconcerting way before answering. “With fire!” He did some kind of complex motions with his hands, and a fireball burst from a hole that formed in the air in front of him. There was a… presence on the other side of the hole. I could feel it reach out to me. What are you? Would you like power? Would you like my power? So pretty, yes, another pretty for ME! There was a madness there that I wanted nothing to do with.

  I had a vision of tentacles and eyes. Of desire and wanton pain. Of eons of boredom and raw NEED. It wanted me and everyone and everything and it wanted to do horrifying things with its new toys…

  The presence withdrew as the hole disappeared.

  I shuddered and watched the fireball start flying towards the forest troll. That entire exchange happened in less than a second, instead of the hours I experienced. My skin crawled at the remembered touch of that being of immense power and madness.

  The troll cried out in anger and pain, thrashing about as it burned. Crabs continued to giggle and rub his hands together as he watched his burning victim.

  “Dude, calm down,” said an annoyed Sergeant Twinkle Toes. The goblin nodded and tried, unsuccessfully, to stifle his giggles.