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3. The Weight of Despair and Depression

  Last night, insomnia hit us all. No matter how much we tried, sleep remained an elusive stranger to us. They guided us into a vast, opulent chamber that felt more like a grand house than a mere room. We divided the chamber into two distinct halves: one side for the men and the other for the women. The chamber boasted numerous two-tiered beds, each adorned with plush, embroidered linens that promised a cozy night’s rest. Gleaming, marble-tiled bathrooms lined one side, complete with ornate fixtures and fragrant soaps that filled the air with a soothing aroma. In the corner, a spacious kitchen awaited, equipped with polished wooden cabinets and a sturdy, wrought-iron stove that seemed to invite culinary adventures. What more could be there?

  Strangely, it felt as though they had anticipated every possible need and desire we might have.

  Yet, despite all the thoughtful details, none of it was enough to make it feel like home. Which left us feeling like guests in a beautiful but foreign space. And then, right after switching off the lights and settling in for the night, homesickness struck! The muffled sobs of the girls echoed softly in the darkness, and their friends offering words of comfort that mingled with deep sighs of longing, piercing through the veil we made in the border of the chamber.

  As for us men, the silence was heavy with unspoken emotions. We lay awake, staring at the ceiling, each of us grappling with our own sense of loss. Some whispered stories of home, recounting favorite memories and familiar faces, while others exchanged quiet reassurances, trying to mask their vulnerability. Yet, despite our attempts to project strength, a shared yearning lingered in the air, reminding us that no matter how well-equipped our surroundings were, nothing could replace the warmth and connection of home.

  Mr. Taka stepped forward to reassure us with his calm demeanor. He shared his wisdom, teaching us techniques to find sleep in any situation, no matter how uncomfortable or foreign. With a steady voice, he demonstrated deep breathing exercises, guiding us to inhale slowly and exhale fully, releasing the weight of our worries. He spoke of visualization, encouraging us to picture a peaceful place—a serene beach or a cozy room filled with laughter. As he offered tips on creating a mental sanctuary, his presence provided a sense of comfort.

  Akiyo, however, found no solace in Mr. Taka’s techniques, much like myself, which clenched our hearts further. As the rest of us tried to absorb the calming techniques, he slipped into a world of his own. Disassociating from the noise around him, he meticulously arranged his bedding, creating a cocoon of order amid the chaos of emotions. Once settled in, he reached for his phone and earbuds in his pants pockets from our world. Then he navigated through playlists until he found the familiar melodies that resonated with him.

  He sought refuge in the rhythms and lyrics that spoke to his soul. In that moment, he was both present and distant, caught in a bittersweet embrace of sound that both comforted and isolated him.

  I followed after and did the same. What can i say? It wasn't for us all.

  Our third member, Okaya meanwhile, driven not by optimism but by a desire for escapism, took a different approach than Akiyo and I. Instead of retreating into himself, he forced his attention outward, striving to immerse himself in the energy of the crowd and Mr. Taka’s calming presence. His gaze was fixed intently on the teacher as if he were absorbing every word like a lifeline. He fidgeted with his hands, tapping his fingers rhythmically against his thigh, trying to sync his heartbeat with the pulse of the group.

  He focused on the shared laughter and camaraderie around him, attempting to draw strength from the collective spirit. When the group discussed their feelings, Okaya chimed in with light-hearted comments, offering jokes and playful banter, all the while pushing down the swell of homesickness that threatened to surface. He was determined to stay engaged, believing that by connecting with others, he could momentarily escape the weight of his own emotions.

  He would try and encourage me and even Akiyo to come back to the crowd, but he knew better than that, and so did we.

  Mr. Taka made sure his voice and instructions also reached to girls whom, got closer to the veil separating us.

  It took many hours, the weight of our thoughts and emotions pressing down like a heavy blanket, and finally, out of sheer mental and emotional exhaustion, one by one we succumbed to an uneasy sleep. It barely did us any good.

  My sleep became so light i would wake up repeatedly after an hour, then half an hour, then twenty minutes. It added to my overall frustration. i was starting to hate these people. Then i tried not to be so selfish, they had to do it, right? And out of rotten luck, it was us. The thought of how my parents would be doing right now gnawed at my psyche. I was getting closer to having a melt down.

  That is, when i found another way to distract myself. I opened my system screen, intending it to be visible only to it's owner, Me. Needless to say, the lack of reaction from those who were still awake as i was, proved enough that it was hidden to their sights now. I immersed myself in the details shown.

  ***

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  Name: Jin Ryuji

  Age: 20

  Gender: Male

  Level: 1

  Hp: ------------------- 20/20

  Mp: ------------------- 30/30

  Class: ??

  Armor class: 5

  Strength: 8 - Dexterity: 11 - Constitution: 11 - Intelligence: 12 - Wisdom: 8 - Charisma*: 16

  ( Arcana: - )

  <<

  >>

  ***

  As the sun rose, its warm light slowly crept through the windows, casting a golden hue across the room. The soft rays illuminated the faces of those still lost in slumber, highlighting the traces of weariness and vulnerability etched upon them. One by one, we awoke, blinking against the brightness, the remnants of our dreams fading like morning mist. The initial grogginess was soon replaced by a collective sense of anticipation.

  Mr. Taka was already awake, standing by a window and his silhouette against the rising sun. He turned to face us with a reassuring smile, as if he knew that we’d all need encouragement to face the day ahead. The unease of the previous night still hung in the air, but in the light of dawn, it felt a little less daunting, but then i thought, 'who would comfort him?'

  Maybe being able to handle everything like this alone, was the factor which made him a true adult. We shouldn't make it any harder on him, we've got to step forward as young adults.

  Right at 8 in the morning, a firm knock echoed from the wooden door through the chamber, breaking the lingering silence of early morning. It drew our attention and stirred us from our thoughts. Moments later, the door creaked open to reveal a procession of royal servants—maids in crisp white and red uniforms and butlers in tailored black and crimson suits—standing at attention, their expressions a blend of professionalism and grace.

  “Your breakfast is ready,” The head maid announced, her voice melodic yet respectful, “and your equipments has been prepared for the day’s activities.” The maids held trays laden with an array of delicacies: golden-brown pastries, fresh fruits glistening with morning dew, and steaming pots of tea and coffee that filled the air with their rich aromas.

  Suffice to say, who wouldn't start drooling?

  Meanwhile, the butlers held an assortment of bags and equipment, their arms laden with the essential gear we would need for the day. Heavy satchels bulged with armor, while neatly folded garments in rich fabrics rested atop the bags, ready for us to don. The clinking of metal hinted at the weapons tucked within—swords, daggers and staves. the blades were polished to a bright sheen, reflecting the sun’s rays like promises of protection.

  They waited patiently, hands clasped in front of them, ready to deliver, but mindful of the need for our permission to enter.

  Eventually Mr. Taka, having checked on both boys and girls with Aira, gave them permission to proceed.

  The atmosphere shifted from quiet reflection to a bustling energy as the maids and butlers moved gracefully about the room, setting the table and arranging the breakfast items with care. then politely handing over our specific tools and armors to each of our personal beds. It was a new beginning, marked by the simple yet profound act of sharing a meal together, a moment to refuel our bodies and spirits before facing whatever challenges lay ahead.

  We dug in, the tempting aroma of the breakfast spread coaxing our appetites to life. The moment we were seated, the previous night’s unease began to fade, replaced by the comforting routine of sharing a meal. Between mouthfuls, we discussed our plans, speculating about what the day’s training would entail. Would we face physical challenges, or perhaps tactical lessons?

  Finally, As we finished our meal, the servants discreetly cleared away the remnants, their movements fluid and practiced, ensuring the focus remained on us. With a satisfied belly, and the assistance of a butler or maid, we each changed into our armors and adventure clothing.

  Mine was a bit embarrassing yet majestic to wear, for it was indeed a musician’s clothing. The fabric shimmered with hues of deep blue and gold, the intricate patterns woven throughout the material catching the light with every movement. As I stood before the mirror, adjusting the collar and smoothing down the sleeves, I couldn’t help but feel a touch of self-consciousness. The outfit, though grand, bore a resemblance to that of a street performer with its flamboyant design.

  I took a deep breath, reminding myself that every adventurer has their own path, and my role was no less important than the others. As I turned to join my triad, I caught their gazes lingering on my attire, and I immediately braced for potential teasing. Instead, I was met with smiles and nods of approval.

  “You’ll enchant us all with your music!” Akiyo exclaimed, breaking the tension and reminding me of the unique strength that my skills could bring to our group.

  But i wasn't really a bard.

  With my heart racing and a grin forcefully spreading across my face, I joined my friends. I looked at Okaya, his dark themed attire gave him away to me without the need to even look at his class in system. He was a rogue, and every detail of his ensemble spoke of stealth and cunning. The fitted black leather jacket hugged his form, adorned with subtle pockets designed for concealing tools of the trade. A hood draped over his shoulders, casting shadows across his features, while dark trousers laced with hidden sheaths for daggers and grenades completed his look.

  Then there was Akiyo, the druid. a striking figure amid our eclectic group. His attire was a blend of natural elements and flowing fabrics that seemed to dance with the breeze. Shades of green and earthy browns adorned his garments, symbolizing a forest. Shapes of leaves and vines were carved into his short sleeves. His wooden oak staff was short but masterfully shaped nonetheless.

  I always knew he would be a druid, even in the little d&d campaigns we played together in dormitory, he had a druid character.

  The musical Instrument they gave me was a medium-sized lyre. Between all known fantasy bard instruments, it was famous not only for its sound, but also for the reputation that anyone could play it. Crafted from polished wood and adorned with intricate carvings, the lyre was a work of art in itself. Its design was elegant yet sturdy, built to withstand the rigors of travel and adventure. The strings glimmered in the light, each one tuned to perfection, ready to unleash melodies that could charm many hearts and ears.

  “Are you ready to make some magic with that?” Okaya asked, a teasing glint in his eyes.

  “Absolutely,” I replied, a grin spreading across my face, winking with my wooden brown hued orbs. “Let’s see what stories i can tell.”

  "Say all you want, i'll show you real magic." Akiyo made it a competition.

  I scoffed at him, but deep down admired him for it. What could be a better strategy than to aspire ourselves and friends to do their best and not fall behind?

  With that, I strummed the strings, letting the sweet notes fill the air. The sound was captivating, and I could already feel an excitement, along with a hidden fear, bubble within me.

  ***

  We arrived at some kind of training grounds behind the castle, at its eastern edge and beyond the walls. The area was expansive, surrounded by sturdy wooden fences and dotted with various training equipment: dummies for archery, sparring rings for one-on-one combat, be it physical or magical. The ground was worn from countless feet, the grass trampled down to a patchy carpet of green. In the distance, I could see a group of knights scattered and watching over for any outside intruders.

  Beyond the grounds was a dense forest, a sprawling expanse of towering trees. The air blowing from there was rich with the scent of pine and damp earth, mingling with the sweet aroma of blooming wildflowers, or at least these were the appearance of the environment.

  "Alright, everyone! Gather around! It’s time for a proper warm-up while we wait for the king to arrive and begin.” Mr. Taka, whose job was a cleric with holy supportive and healing spells, instructed us.

  He had changed out of his formal university professor attire and now donned a long gray robe, which flowed elegantly around him. A sturdy mace hung at his side, and a pocket on the robe was filled with a few bottles and a small, thick book, Its cover was a deep black, adorned with a striking white crescent, a golden leopard, and a silver sword intricately etched into the surface.

  If he weren’t so good-looking and impeccably clean, one might have easily mistaken him for a middle-aged church father from the era of the Crusades, exuding an air of wisdom and authority that resonated with the religious figures of old.

  Thus, we formed a large circle around him, ready to begin our exercises, and preparing for our tutorial.

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