The Grandmaster of the Grey

  The fall.

  The subsind deepest depth where thought ay align to something strange, something terrifying. It is a pce well known by the Grey Order's apostles. A pce feared by them, a pce where they store their knowledge.

  The Archive.

  Nizzal sat up in her bed, and looked around. It was dark, she likely woke up in the middle of the night and she felt dazed for some reason. She waited for a while blinking frequently hoping for the strange haze to clear out of her vision naturally. Minutes have passed since she woke, and minutes have gone by just the same. She has not moved or said anything else, since her initial statement. She thought back to those words and fell into a deep mindful state of pure thought.

  Something was different. Her feelings, her senses, her mood... She had this scary sense of doom, it was just ominous. This... this feeling of slow but stantly growing sense has horrified her, her solid uanding and views of the world she believed to know to detail were shaken moments ago, iime she was surrounded by the Mist of Time. Now she saw different things, sehem, heard them, things that she didn't reize. She felt as if she had stepped into a s that was moving under her feet, never knowing when it would finally suck her us surfabsp;

  This sense of uainty began to grow in her, until the moment she could not will herself to leave the warmth of the bed that she felt was being the only stable thing in her life. She uood, that something vital had ged in her, while she was in the mist. She gained baething she lost, or maybe she only believed it to be lost... This something, had shaken the foundation of her psyche, and now, her ego was vulnerable. She reized the signs, si was not the first time, su old being had gohrough this.

  Her personality, had melted at least partially and it was time to recreate it into somethier, something new. Su experience, was always horrifying as the result was uain, but it o be dohe process had begun, it couldn't be stopped anymore. This was how solidified personalities were only able to create major ges ihemselves. They were the result of a shock as a need for survival, or the after effeental awakenings, personality growth or major ges in beliefs.

  Nizzal, clutched onto the hem of the b as if it were her only lifeline.

  -This, never gets less terrifying...

  She mumbled to herself as she closed her eyes once again, and began her breathing trol, after some time she began her dest into the depths of her vulnerable psyche with a somewhat calming breathing.

  Soon she began her slow dest into the darkest pit of the mind, into her own personal oblivion. The pce all intelligent beings dread to visit the most. Some may even call this pce, Hell.

  As her fall tinued she began to hear a series of familiar sounds. First the sounds of g and ripping apart wood and rock were heard. She opened her eyes and looked around, she saw as incredibly heavy wooden bookcases slid on the floor and walls crashing into each other violently. Each of those bookcases were different in size, but all of them were huge and inparable to real bookcases, also their design was different, when you looked at them more carefully, some of them wasn't even made from wood. There were every possible type of imaginable bookcases, like a museum of them but rger. She looked at it with the same awe she felt when she came here first, the physical maion of the Archive. This was it, the pce she feard the most, her own subscious space.

  The memories surrounded her, she was in the middle of a byrinth. A byrinth made out of bookcases holding her own memories and also, the other master's memories. It was certainly beautiful, yet all Nizzal could se that moment ure dread.

  At that moment a familiar voice spoke up behind her.

  -Funny this ohinks: trapped in the mind, scary, real scary, that's the maxi truth.

  I whirled around and looked at the person standio a slowly sliding bookcase. It articurly old gungan, ohat I reized immediately a relieved.

  -Master Cil-Cil Muz, so it is you this time.

  The gungan's eyes looked at me emphatically.

  -You were the one, who pleaded for me to e, youngling.

  Said the gungan, as his tone ged to a much more serious one, losing most of the pyfulness usually associated with his rabsp;

  My face turned grim as I nodded silently, aowledging his statement.

  I stepped closer to the old gungan with the iion of hugging him, but I stopped myself forcefully halfway through the a, as if I was expected to do so. It was very hard to stop, so incredibly hard... I just wao get some reassurance, even if it was nothing more than a soothing lie.

  -I... I am afraid... master... this time, I am truly terrified... I ck the power, I am weak, vulnerable... what if... I am not strong enough...

  I was too lost in my own fears and, terrors, and didn't notice master movements. Before I k, there were twe arms hugging me close in a tight embrace. I couldn't hold back my feelings anymore, and I broke down in a sobbing mess, grasping onto the cloth of the aged master, or more like, its imprint imprisoned in my mind, at the state of his passing.

  His force spirit lived on free, and it tio experienew knowledge, therefore the two entities could not be treated as the same. While in truth, her one of them was ehe same as the inal master was, and also they were the same in a sense.

  Most in the order believed that these presences were nothing, more but an incredibly plicated imprint of his mind created at the moment of death by the ritual itself.

  Some believe it is nothing more, but a desperate attempt created by our own mind a out to guide us through the process. That was what I thought too, but I am not really sure anymore. Iy, we don't know what they are, but of course os would not allow it to be stated like that. Because, it would unknowingly remind us of the fact, that we are so uain, fragile and small.

  Master Muz hugged me close, while whispering into my ear protrusions.

  -There is nothing to fear, little Nizzy, death is not the end, it is just aep to grow beyond yourself. It will pass through you as easily as the warm sunshine passes through the little openings between the leafs of old trees or the warm crystal clear water of Naboo.

  His eyes at that moment, held a mysterious longing, so alive, and so gehat my heart pained for the old master. He saw my sad expression.

  He smiled at me and said with radiating warmth.

  -Remember young ohis teique was not created to escape death, but to learn to embrace it wheime es. Every one of us was always alone in our passing, and we could not reassure anyone from the other side. Yet now, this teique born from our dedication and love has created this miracle, now we help you and others along the way.

  My throat felt dry as I asked.

  -... Am I going to die?

  I stared at him as a new wave of doubt seeped into my mind, but the old gungan only ughed.

  -Yes, but not just yet.

  I felt my shoulders shake with my relieved dry sobs. Hearing those words felt so good, it made me rex a bit, as some of the pressure left my body as I said.

  -I know... but still...

  He patted my head, gly without a sed thought.

  -You are still young, there are many things waiting for you, even if... a part of you will never leave this pce.

  I tio cry silently.

  -It is what we call ge after all, isn't it young twi'lek? Something o give way, for something else to take its pce. You will die today, Nizzal the Grey as you have been known, but you will be reborn, as someorust in the Archive, trust in the Ford trust in us.

  The st word, echoed through the endless corridors of the slowly ging library, through the thousands year old halls, of long fotten whispers and lost deeds, all recorded in the soul of this small child.

  The still shaking form of the girl nodded with a new determination as she separated herself from the master, and slowly distanced herself from him.

  Master Muz nodded, and he began to speak an a mantra, it was told in a long fotten version of the Sith nguage. Slowly other voices began to join in the mantra saying it with the same mystical zeal, as echoes of the ting filled the emptyness.

  "Sesie ijul's, sesie luv?ts's, sautumas kash ijuitso, jena'tes, kad niekada uzmirsti.

  Tapti', tapti', tave van kash ijuts, kraujas witsudz's, kisai's, sizizodzow's!

  Basas witsudz, basas witsudz vi tave kitok Kichsizizodzow ikkichil!

  Tave qy visa midwanas, azinimas iv tu'iea, tave vaisius iv tu'iea kuwi dzazkchluzizodzo ir aukotis.

  Zhol mus's, zhol kash kosh kia ichlv?ts tave tvarka, ir mes aras kosh, kia ichlv?ts zhol.

  Tapti' ziur, suy, basas witsudz kia tave ijukis, tave stigma sutss isuls tave wo anas meo itsotskch!

  Tave Mig iv Amzi, tsiluwi ji ahayonts!

  Tave itsok deptok, sutss chikchs tave memorsuzi, sichik?dz anas, sutss tsuli nenx zinot tukodi sichik?dz.

  ?Tuti sikiy!

  TAVE ZIL TVARKA KASH VISAS DARVAL!

  BA-BA-DUM!

  BA-BA-DUM!

  BA-BA-DUM!"

  Of course I uood all those words easily, and listeo them with extreme tration and focus. These were the words, spoken, and roughly trao gactic standard.

  "Lost souls, lost lives, waiting in silend darkness, but never fotten.

  e, e, the hour is due, blood witnesses, apostles, as!

  Bear witness, bear witness as the new Grandmaster appears!

  The force all powerful, knowledge of yours, the fruit of your wisdom and sacrifice.

  It forms, it is born to serve the order, and we are born, to serve it.

  e see, hurry, bear wito the signs, the stigma which shows the ohat ted!

  The Mist of Time, clouded her eyes!

  The deep depth which takes the memories, ges that, which could not have been ged.

  Rejoice!

  THE GRAY ORDER IS WHOLE AGAIN!

  BA-BA-DUM!

  BA-BA-DUM!

  BA-BA-DUM!"

  While the a words filled and echoed through the halls, the library came alive on a different scale. Every bookcase, every book, moved cshed, some broke down, some recreated itself from the broken pieces of wood and ripped apart paper, metals and rocks. It was an anized chaos, that filled every er of the pce. The depth of my mind. It was mesmerizing, like small pieces of a huge mae all of them falling into the right pces in a viole also peaceful storm. There was destru, and from the ashes of those gs, new books and new bookcases formed almost immediately. Light and darkness, w in tandem as a whole.

  At that moment I felt goosebomps all over my body as I uood. This was, the true nature of the Force. I khis even before I came here... but now, it was different... Until now, I k, on a theoretical level, but now, as I withe se. Now I finally believe it. As I sciously withe metaphysical happenings of my own unsind I finally believe it.

  There was no more fear.

  Stillness.

  I felt plete pea the middle of my own soul surrounded by horrors aru. Now I smiled lightly, looking at the chaos reinforced in my own beliefs. If the force were able to create pead order in this chaos, than it create it anywhere.

  Suddenly all the movement, and all the crashing sounds stopped at the same time, filling the pce with a mystical and religious stillness and plete silence. In that stillness a series of words, sentences have appeared in my mind as if a curtain has been pulled aside, they burst into my mind with a burning bzing power. I fell to my knees, as the wave of forergy washed through my entire body.

  There is no fear, only the truth.

  Through the truth I shell rid myself from fear.

  Without fear, I will find peabsp;

  In peace, I shell accept myself.

  With acceptance I shall find my weakness.

  Only by knowing myself, I grow beyond myself.

  I repeated those words, as they came to my mind, with unyielding crity and religious fervor. At the end I stood up, and the tall bookcases felt no lohat tall, I sensed no more ominousness, or threatening pressure from them. Now as I stood again, it seemed, that eveallest of bookcases were bowing down to me. Accepting their new master. Yes. This is how it should be. Knowledge is what frees the soul, but knowledge without humility poisons it. I stood oop of the Archive above all the towers of books at that moment. Yet, I kneeled down again, down to the floor which I was standing on, bowed my head and kissed the dusty marble.

  The moment I kissed the floor, a thundering rulfed the hall. It was filled with the sound of hundreds if not thousands of voices in different tongues, all shouting with emotion in their own nguage, and I uood all of them.

  LONG LIVE THE GRANDMASTER, CHOSEN BY THE FORCE! LONG LIVE THE GRANDMASTER, CHOSEN BY THE FORCE!

  At st, I stood up once more, and sehe vibration of the energy in the air arouhe for its purest raw form, was surrounding me, both the darkside and the lightside united in harmony around and inside my body. I could feel that there was no more rivalry betweehey were at peace. I looked to my side, and saw them, both versions of me, standing on my side, smiling at me with acceptanbsp;

  -I always believed in you, I khat you were the ohe one who will bee the new Grandmaster.

  Stated the older version of myself, with a warm smile. While the other one also showed me a hesitant smile as she said.

  -Well, it seems you were right for once... It is bound to happen here and there... eventually, but don't get used to it sis.

  -Did you just call me sis? You never said that before... I am so happy!

  -What? NO! You are beginning to turn delusional... just stop... what a drag!

  She rolled her eyes, as the older one hugged her close with pure unhidden happiness. However, this time, her one of them were hurt.

  -Oh don't be so damn surprised... It is not that big of a secret, that the Grandmaster of your b order use all force teiques without any type of ive side effects. Be that from the light or the darkside at any time... But don't get too cocky, girl! I am still watg you... It would be a shame to fall from this height to such... OW?! Are you seriously ping my face get off me!

  -You are always so cute, when you bee this ominous and all... I 't help it.

  -GET OFF ME!

  -Say the magic word.

  -I will kill you.

  -Wrong!

  I watched them act around me like extremely pampered children, and I began to ugh. I ughed from the very heart of my being, and that ughter, filled the entire pce with warmth. Their fighting soon stopped as they began to look at me with wide eyes, but I couldn't stop ughing.

  -Sis, I think we lost her...

  -Should I start searg for the ohen? But, it's s...

  Hearing those words, only made me ugh harder.