As I was finishing breakfast and brushing my teeth, Amy called out from the living room, “Do you wanna play tennis?” The suggestion caught me off guard. In our previous life, I hadn’t been overweight per se, but I still suffered a heart attack during the COVID lockdown in 2020, after spending eight months barely moving from my bedroom to the living room to teach online classes. The sedentary lifestyle had taken its toll, and Amy hadn’t fared much better. She had developed rheumatoid arthritis, which caused her significant pain in our later years. It made sense to start playing sports again—anything to stave off the ailments that had plagued us.
“Hell yeah!” I responded, eager to get moving.
We hit the tennis courts later that morning, and to my surprise, I absolutely crushed her. When we used to play together in high school we were evenly matched. But back in 2012, I had spent two years as an assistant coach for the girls' tennis and softball teams at the school I worked at, and while I hadn’t been a standout player, the knowledge I’d gained from coaching made me a much better player this time around. Alex came along to watch, clearly itching to join in, though his five-year-old body wasn’t quite ready for the rigors of the game.
After our match, we hurried back to the apartment to shower and change before heading to the BBQ that our neighbor Emiliano had invited us to. As we were leaving, we bumped into Emiliano and his family in the hallway. “Hey Randy, heading to the BBQ now too?” he asked.
“Yep,” I replied with a grin. Then, with a mischievous glint in my eye, I asked, “Emiliano, what did the fish say when it ran into a concrete wall?”
“Uh…” He looked puzzled.
“Dam,” I answered, and Amy rolled her eyes at my corny joke while Alex buried his face in his hands, embarrassed by his dad’s sense of humor.
As we walked to the courtyard where the BBQ was taking place, Emiliano introduced his family. “This is my wife, Maria,” he said, gesturing to a petite, under-five-foot Latina woman with black hair and brown eyes. Amy was thrilled to meet someone shorter than her, a rarity in her experience. “Hello,” Amy said warmly, and Maria replied with a smile and a nod.
“And this is my son, Jose,” Emiliano continued, introducing a boy who appeared to be about Alex’s age but a bit taller. More greetings were exchanged, and then Emiliano added, “Don’t mind Maria—she’s still working on her English.”
Fortunately, I knew a bit of Spanish. “?Qué pasa, Maria?” I asked. She responded, but her Spanish was too advanced for me to fully grasp, so I awkwardly turned back to Emiliano, hoping to avoid further embarrassment. “So, what do you do for a living?” I asked.
“I’m a mechanic. I work at the shop down the road. If you ever have car troubles, just hit me up—I’ll give you a friend’s rate,” he offered.
“Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind. I’m currently a delivery driver, but I won’t be there for long,” I said, feeling a bit self-conscious.
We continued our casual conversation as we walked, with Emiliano translating for Maria. When we reached the courtyard, the mouthwatering scent of BBQ greeted us. “What do you want to do first? Eat or mingle with the other residents?” I asked Amy.
“I think I smell brisket. Does that answer your question?” Amy replied, and Emiliano chimed in, explaining that the complex owner, a Texan, always made brisket for these gatherings.
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We eagerly joined the line for food, and soon enough, our plates were filled. I grabbed some brisket, watermelon, cornbread, and a Coke. The brisket, while decent, wasn’t quite Texas BBQ quality. It was no wonder the owner had ended up running an apartment complex instead of a BBQ joint.
After eating, we joined Emiliano and Maria for a game of cornhole, with Amy and me on one team and our new friends on the other. We didn’t keep score—just messed around, enjoying the game and each other’s company. At one point, Emiliano asked, “Have you registered Alex for school yet?”
I glanced over at Alex, who was sitting alone, not playing with the other kids. It was understandable—he was five with the mind of a 25-year-old. “Not yet. Amy is taking him to register tomorrow,” I replied.
“Why doesn’t she go with Maria? She’s taking Jose to register tomorrow too. Jose can translate, but it would be good to have an English-speaking adult there,” Emiliano suggested.
“I’d like that,” Amy agreed.
As we played, I found myself getting increasingly thirsty. “Man, I’m thirsty,” I muttered.
“They’ve got bottled water over there,” Emiliano pointed out.
I frowned. “I hate bottled water. It pollutes the environment with all that plastic waste. In 20 years, there’ll be microplastics in every part of our environment and bodies. I bet those microplastics will lead to an increase in heart attacks and strokes while also decreasing fertility. And most bottled water is just tap water rebranded.”
DING! Installation complete.
A loud sound echoed in my mind. I looked over at Amy and Alex, who both had startled expressions. “Sorry, I just remembered something. We’ve gotta go,” I blurted out. Alex added in, “you left the stove on!” Amy said, “who said that!” So Alex and I each grabbed an arm and dragged Amy back home.
As soon as we were inside, Alex shouted, “System! We got a sweet, overpowered system!”
Amy looked confused. “What’s a system?”
Alex explained excitedly, “Remember I told you about protagonists in those web novels getting overpowered ‘gold fingers’ after transmigration, time travel, or rebirth? Well, this is one of those gold fingers—a system that shows stats and gives quests and rewards. Say ‘System’ in your mind and see what comes up.”
Amy hesitated, then did as Alex suggested. A screen appeared before her eyes, and this is what she saw:
Welcome to the Clean Planet System.
As a reward for your heroics and care for the environment, please utilize this system to clean the planet, making it possible to house spiritual energy.
Randy
- Lifespan 23/85 (Will drop to 55 if you continue with no exercise and your twinkie habit from your last life)
- Cultivation: NA
Amy
- Lifespan 25/90 (will reduce to 70 if you continue like last life and don't exercise)
- Cultivation: NA
Alex
- Lifespan 5/85 (will drop to 75 if you only exercise once a week like last life)
- Cultivation: NA
“Damn, I didn’t have much longer to live in our last life!” I shout. After all, I ate a lot of twinkies.
“You have a newbie gift. Would you like to open it now?”
Amy stared at the screen, still processing what she was seeing. “What does this mean?” she asked, looking to me for answers.
“It means we just got a huge advantage in this new life, I guess I really don’t have to become a teacher again!” I said, a grin spreading across my face. “Maybe we can’t live forever, but we can definitely live longer since lifespan is the stat it shows us.” Alex Comments. “It also looks like cultivation will be possible.”
“What is cultivation?” Amy responds.
“Well it’s like wizardry and superheroes and gods, all in one package, but you have different levels. The higher the level, the more powerful you are, and the longer you can live. Chinese fantasy system.” I explain. “But it says NA.”
“...” All three of us are perplexed. Is our new system reliable? Why would it say NA?