“People will eventually appreciate the benefits of a well-equipped kitchen,” proclaimed Impel, who had finally finished chopping meat.
“Especially the importance of a well-functioning kitchen for war,” agreed Lady Evelyne. “The kitchen is often underestimated. Yet what we do here is hugely important.”
She looked around with satisfaction. They had remodeled: Two additional kitchenettes had been installed at the back for the Jewish players so that their meals could be prepared kosher. Thanks to Ramadan, the Muslim players now ate at night, which relieved the situation in the dining room enormously - now they could eat in two shifts until the former bedroom and bathroom of Thunder Horny and Thunder Cock had been cleared out and attached to the dining room by breaking through the wall. Since Kodaxx and Dylan had taken over the shopping with their trucks, the enormous quantities of food needed could be managed. Yes, you could say: it was finally working!
Meanwhile, at the front of the kitchen, Marzzzz was sitting on a chair and being tended to by several women. Scappy tried isopropyl alcohol, Genny lemon juice and Taste nail polish remover, but the superglue that had stuck the mission magazines to Marzzzz was stubborn.
Marzzzz whined in all registers during this procedure, not so much because he was a wimp, but rather because he liked the girls' reactions so much. As soon as he whined, they began to comfort and stroke him tenderly. One of the notes stuck to Marzzzz's forehead was extremely stubborn. The girls scrubbed in vain, but there was still some residue on it, which read in bold block letters: “Light! Love! Peace!”.
Lady Evelyne observed the situation, shaking her head, before saying in an emphatically friendly manner: “I'll need you later, by the way, my dear. You have to go back into town.”
Marzzzz looked at Lady Evelyne suspiciously. “Why?”
“We're missing plates,” said the lady as innocently as possible.
Marzzzz gasped for air. “Oh yeah, we're missing plates? Why do you think?”
“Well, because you recruited too many people. It's clearly your fault!”
“Oh, now it's all my fault again, as usual! Recruitment is closed! Couldn't it be that we're missing plates because you keep throwing them at me?” Marzzzz grumbled indignantly.
Lady Evelyne raised her eyebrows. “Do you want another plate thrown at your head?”
Marzzzz fled from the kitchen, screaming.
__________________________________________
Thunder was sitting in his boss's office, not suspecting anything bad, when Marzzzz stormed in in a rage.
“I want to complain!”
Thunder looked up in astonishment. “The complaints office is closed... we did away with that back in Mink's day. What's happened? And why does your forehead say 'Light! Love! Peace!'?”
Marzzzz groped furiously at his forehead. “It won't come off! We tried, but it's stuck! But, brother, don't distract me. I want to complain. It's serious.”
Thunder sighed. Important matters had to be dealt with personally, even as dictator, there was no way around it. “Sit down and tell me what's going on.”
“This new girl - this Lady Evelyne - she's killing me! I'm being chased around all the time! She chases me from one task to the next! She wants me to go into town all the time to get things and do things for her! And if she's not happy with me or something doesn't suit her, she throws plates at my head!”
Thunder couldn't suppress a grin. “Well, that sounds like a happy marriage.”
“Are you kidding me, bro? I'm not marrying her in my life, I'll kill myself first!”
“Light, love, peace, brother,” Thunder replied reassuringly, ”you shouldn't get so upset about it. Just relax.”
“Relax? You must be out of your mind! Don't you give a damn how she treats me?”
Thunder smirked. “Well, brother, YOU recruited her!”
Marzzzz gasped, “On your orders! You told me to recruit her!”
“Really, did I? I don't even remember that. You know, the door was closed and it was so loud in here...”
“Oh yes you did!” raged Marzzzz, "You said ’you take care of Lady Evelyne, I'll recruit Black in the meantime'... ooooohhhh... wait a minute! I've got it now! That was on purpose!”
Thunder tried to look as innocent as possible. “Really, on purpose?”
“Oh yes!” roared Marzzzz, ”You're such a bastard! You've set it up perfectly again! You sent me to Lady Evelyne and you took care of Black yourself! Now you've got pretty, sweet Black, and I've got that vicious noob dragon, lurking in the kitchen and throwing plates!"
He turned on his heel and left the boss's office, slamming the door.
Thunder smiled. There was nothing like good staff planning.
___________________________________________
Meanwhile, Sloth from the 641 was busy forging a powerful alliance of seven cities. Seven cities on the GW map! Against one, THE one, that damned, cursed, accursed 652! That had to work. The Church of Synergy had already had its first successes in its missionary work, and other great leaders had joined them. But others hesitated, and even those who had been recruited caused difficulties and tried to assert their own interests.
Sloth had changed his tactics. No one should think that he was just the stupid and slow sloth here! He was quite the strategist, and he knew it was time to change his image too. The mild and benevolent leader was history - now something scary and terrifying was needed! People should be scared of him!
Determined to appear scary and frightening from now on, he changed his name, his appearance and his motto.
A styling as a horror clown, with a white-painted face and red wig. A slogan: “I'm every nightmare you've ever had!” - and a renaming to DOINK as the crowning glory. DOINK sounded much scarier than Sloth, he was sure of it.
Satisfied, he looked at himself in the mirror when there was a knock on the door.
“Come in!” called Sloth, and Lil Arrow entered the room. As soon as he saw the leader, he clapped his hands together in delight: “Oh Sloth, you look just like me!”
“Huh?” asked Sloth, irritated.
“Yes! White-painted face, wig... that's my style! Wonderful, you've finally acquired a taste for fashion. And I was your trendsetter and your inspiration! Wait, you're still missing some powder on your face, otherwise you'll have white make-up everywhere later...”
The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.
And before Sloth could defend himself, Lil Arrow already had the powder puff in his hand and thrust it full into the leader's face. Sloth got a whole load of powder in his nose, mouth and eyes, had to sneeze and cough immediately and couldn't see a thing. The red horror clown wig fell off his head as he desperately flailed his arms.
“Go away! Damn it, Lil Arrow, get the fuck out of here!”
“I only meant well!” Lil Arrow protested in a huff, but retreated as ordered. Sloth cursed. He wiped the powder from his eyes, picked up the red wig and put it back on.
Terrible, these members! Unfortunately, he had to rely on recruiting, er, proselytizing, everything that wasn't three on the trees. It was a disgrace! All because of that damn 652!
He went into the next room, where his two closest confidants Stabbyunicorn and Kir Bear were waiting.
“Well, what do you say?” he asked proudly, turning back and forth in front of them. “New outfit, new name, new profile slogan! Do I look scary and frightening enough now?”
Stabbyunicorn and Kir Bear gave each other a quick glance.
“Certainly, boss,” Stabbyunicorn then said in a soft voice, trying to sound particularly affectionate, ”Kir and I are probably just not the best people to ask that question. We know you and we know what you're really like.”
“I will teach the 652 to fear!” Sloth declared with fervor, ”and the other cities too! Because logically, I must be the leader of the alliance of the seven cities. I have the most experience. And I run a church after all, so I'm also spiritually fulfilled enough for this important task.”
“Oh yes,” said Kir Bear in a singing voice, ”spiritual fulfillment is so important! We're about to have a group cuddle in the main hall followed by a circle of chairs. Are you coming too?”
“Of course,” said Sloth, ”I won't miss it.”
Stabbyunicorn reached for her handbag and pulled out a powder puff. “Just maybe let me powder you up a bit, otherwise you'll smear all that white face makeup on everyone at the group cuddle...”
________________________________________
All you could hear in the dining room was ravenous grunting. A whole horde of Thunder brothers had pounced on the lunch, which today consisted of chili con carne, like a gang of starving people and were now stuffing their faces with incredible speed, with table manners playing a subordinate role. At this point, Slow Pain could have rightly claimed that RxW was all pigs and dogs.
“Wow, that tastes great!” Yuber smacked his lips full and didn't care that half of it fell off, ”so no matter what they're like in the kitchen and that the plates are flying... they can cook and bake! I've never eaten as well as I have in the last few days!”
“Supposedly this is a former harem!” whispered Hen Solo mysteriously, ”They can do anything! Even beyond cooking. It is said that each of them knows about 150 different ways to make a man really happy. And Genny, because she was the favorite of that old sultan, the lion, supposedly knows a few hundred more!”
“Guys, I don't know about you,” smacked Offline, ”but I'm going to the kitchen later and pick one of them and propose to her. A woman who's hot in bed and can also cook really well... that's the absolute dream woman! It doesn't get any better than that!”
“Yes, they're all really pretty too, except for that noob dragon. But the others are all real hot babes in terms of looks and a clear 10!”
“Do we have enough of them for everyone?” asked Offline suspiciously, ”I had the idea first, I want to pick one first! Or does Thunder have first dibs as boss?”
The Thunder brothers thought hard. The boss had always held back on this question, but you never know...
“Chili con carne? Seriously?” shouted Lipsyte, who had been a little late due to a raid and was only now entering the dining room.
“Yeah, tastes absolutely awesome, bro, come over here, there's some more!” yelled a few Thunder brothers, willingly moving closer together.
“You do know that there are dozens of us sleeping in one room, right?” roared Lipsyte, ”17 of you are sleeping in my room alone! And then there's chili con carne? Are you going to kill me with your intestinal gas tonight? That's applied sadism coming out of the kitchen again!”
_______________________________________
Marzzzz stumbled through the entrance hall. He absolutely had to attack something. He urgently needed to attack something now! Luckily, Candycane and DmenAce came towards him.
“Come on guys! Let's go raiding! I really need to zero someone!” growled Marzzzz.
Candycane stared at Marzzzz curiously. “You do realize that you have “Light! Love! Peace!” on your forehead, right?”
“Oh shut the fuck up, everyone...”
_______________________________________
One of the favorite pastimes of all the factions from the last GW, yelling at each other through the windows of the clan castles, was also cultivated with dedication and enthusiasm by all participants in this GW.
“641, why are you attacking us on the tiles?” Liliana from 656 shouted indignantly.
“Because you're not using QR!” came RenaissancE's prompt reply.
“Since when do we have to use QR on the GW map if they're not Lvl 7 diamonds?”
“We decided that as a rule! We may have forgotten to communicate it to you and your leadership!”
“You're out of your minds!” Liliana shouted angrily, ”You can't attack first and then quickly invent a supposed rule afterwards!”
“Yes, we can! That's what we always do! We're the Church of Synergy, it's part of our sacred mission!”
“I don't even know you!” Liliana scolded.
“That's not an argument! You don't know anyone!” Genny from 652 shouted back, ”You didn't know who Marzzzz and Thunder were either!”
“I only know important people!” scolded Liliana, ”I know Ghost! And the rest is unimportant! And I definitely don't need to know this RenaissancE, because he's...”
“...gay!” roared the donkey in between. “He's the gayest one here, nobody needs to know him!”
______________________________________
“You don't need to imagine anything about your supposed skills!” Lil Arrow shouted out of the window of the 641 in the direction of the 652, ”The fact is that Thunder pays you to play. And you have to send him foot pics in return. I have proof! Just take a look at Thunder's island! It's right there!”
“Oh shit, he leaked us,” Black groaned with a chuckle and tore open the window. In the direction of Lil Arrow, she yelled, “Since you already know! The sums aren't right! We recruit normal members with small packages, raid leaders get a big 100 euro package a week!”
Turning back to the others, she said, “Let's see if he really believes this shit.”
Genny rolled his eyes. “Lil Arrow believes everything! Really everything! It was like that in the last GW!”
“Ha, I knew it!” Lil Arrow shouted triumphantly, ”it's all about the money with you guys!”
“Oh,” said Biochest nonchalantly, ”I'm for sale, a mercenary so to speak. If anyone makes me a better offer than Thunder, I'm out of here.”
“There you hear it!” Lil Arrow bawled, his voice rising with indignation, ”No cohesion! No family! No seriousness towards the game! All venal, degenerate idiots on the 652!”
“Degenerate alcoholics and bullies with credit cards please,” Black improved, ”that's right!”
“Now I feel insulted!” muttered Lipsyte, ”although - wait - yes, yes - true!”
____________________________________
“I'm looking for a chicken named Shelby!” yelled Deniz from 641 out the window, ”I want to put it in the oven! Where it belongs!”
Tommy Shelby on the 652 grinned. “Too late, brother! I'm already gone again! You were too slow!”
Sloth pushed his subordinates aside and stepped up to the window himself. “I'll show you how this game really works. I'll teach you all to fear! From now on, it's no more fun!” - Lil Arrow applauded enthusiastically - “From now on, the strings will be changed! The Church of Energy has a mission, and it will pursue it with an iron fist!”
______________________________________
“Aoth, you'll end up as a doormat!” shouted MightyGuySensei from 642.
“Don't yell so loud, bro, I'm standing right next to you! I'm from the same city!” yelled Aoth back.
“I don't care where you are! You'll end up as a doormat everywhere!”
“Exactly!” interjected Shadowhunter from 651, ”because he's a Caesar! A damn traitor, a salad and now a doormat too!”
____________________________________
Aglid had not been able to refrain from sneaking across the city limits and into the kitchen of the 652's clan castle in the dark. He missed talking to Lady Evelyne too much. Besides, as always, he had important news to tell her. And after all, there was nothing wrong with a good piece of cake!
“Do you know what's so special about RxW?” he murmured, well sated after the first slice, ”they teach people humility. It works outwardly and inwardly. It's really amazing!”
“Really?” smiled Lady Evelyne, pushing a second piece of cake towards Aglid.
“Yes, it's really fascinating. It works on everyone. Even Ghost has learned humility - at least at first,” Aglid quickly added. “But I would never have thought it possible for anyone to do that.”
“Oh, I think there's still a lot possible on this map.”
“ Please never stop doing this.”
“How are you guys doing at the moment?”
Aglid sighed. “Well, thanks to the shouting through the windows and the SC, you've noticed what's going on here. The 641 is bullying us. At first it was this alleged QR rule that made them attack us on the tiles. Now they just keep attacking us on the tiles. They're probably making up another great new rule after the fact that they just 'forgot' to communicate.”
Aglid grabbed the second piece of cake.
“You know, milady, we all stay out of Z2 now and don't farm there anymore. 641 is terrible. And we wait... with a thousand pains, but also a lot of anticipation.”
Lady Evelyne looked at Aglid in astonishment. “What are you waiting for?”
Aglid afforded himself a small, nasty, mischievous smile that you wouldn't have thought him capable of.
“We were waiting for RxW to come and teach the 641 humility. It will be a happy day for us all.”
Lady Evelyne grinned. “So this GW is definitely going to be exciting. Two clear announcements are on the table, two cities that are determined to teach each other something. Will 641 teach 652 to fear or will 652 teach 641 humility? To be or not to be, that is the question here...”
