Samantha once again came to with her face on the floor. The feminine, slightly distorted voice of the Director chimed in her head, clear resonant notes encapsulated in memory, the flow quickly instilling a headache. “Note: you have been rendered stunned and senseless due to temporary willpower exhaustion. This was not enforced, but due to the unavoidable ramifications of observer time alteration through the interface by your currently inferior intellect.”

  Chime! “Simulating projected alterations: Introductory Summary equivalent to 10 [Magineer] experience, multiplied to 16 due to status effects. [Magical Invention] upgraded with the enhancement [Runic Reinforcement]. [Tweak Spell: Expedite] changed to [Tweak Spell: Double], and [Tweak Spell: Quicken] requirements reduced.”

  Ting! “[My Devilish Plot All Along] flag triggered. Check! Execution: spell gains captured, cannibalized, and contributed to [Special Package Delivery: Ralli’s Booty]. Wait for it!”

  Chugga, chugga… toot toot! “Cheat simulating… [Split Prediction] upgraded with the enhancement [Spell Reaction]. 99.4% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 100% success rate… cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  Toot. “Cheat simulating… [Foolmaker] upgraded with ‘Jammer’ enchantment. 23.9% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 68.9% success rate… nope. Unsalvageable. Punting inspiration for now…”

  Brrrr… rrn rrn rrrrrn! “Simulating projected alterations: Experience 1 equivalent to 10 [Magineer] experience, multiplied to 16 due to status effects, and 10 [Saboteur] experience, multiplied to 12 due to status effect. [Elemental Mastery] Special Trait added. [Tweak Spell] modified with a limited ‘pool.’ [Tweak Spell: Prepare] added.

  “Challenge 1 quest successful: 5 [Goddess] experience gained, multiplied to 6 due to status effect, 15 [Magineer] experience gained, multiplied to 24 due to status effects, 5 [Saboteur] experience gained, multiplied to 6 due to status effect. [Foolmaker] enhanced with [Magi’s Rapport]. [Bubble Shield] spell added.

  “Give me a ‘hell yeah!’ [Magineer 8] gained. +20 Maximum MP. [Tweak Spell] upgraded by one level to Master.”

  Ting! “[My Devilish Plot All Along] flag triggered. Check! Added more booty (— as if there wasn’t enough, tee hee —). Waity, wait, wait!”

  Sh-zzzip! “Cheat simulating… ‘Wire Jammer’ spell added. 96.8% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 100% success rate… cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  Tic… tic. “Cheat simulating… [Acting (Expert)] added. 100% success of application (— let’s be honest: not much of a stretch —). Cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  Chime! “Simulating projected alterations: Experience 2 and THE GREAT INTERIM equivalent to 20 [Magineer] experience, multiplied to 32 due to status effects, 7 [Saboteur] experience, multiplied to 8 due to status effect, and 3 [Brute] experience. [Multitask Magician] Special Trait added. [Slayer] modified with the entry [Aura of Conquest].

  “Challenge 2 quest successful: 17 [Goddess] experience gained, multiplied to 20 due to status effect, 12 [Magineer] experience gained, multiplied to 19 due to status effects, 7 [Saboteur] experience gained, multiplied to 8 due to status effect, and 3 [Brute] experience. [Jack of All Trades 2] upgraded with enhancement [Simple, Stupid]. [Ascendant] modified with the entry [Snake Friend]. ‘Super Hot’... flagged… cannibalized (— Not censored; likely under new entry! —).

  “Yay. [Brute 1] gained. [Scrapping] skill added.”

  Ting! “[My Devilish Plot All Along] flag triggered. Check! Even more booty; all types of booty. More booty than you can shake a stick at! More booty than Sheb can handle!”

  Thump, thump. “Cheat simulating… ‘Golem Creation’ added to [Magical Invention]. 96.7% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 100% success rate… cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  Bong! “Cheat simulating… [Force Mastery] Special Trait added. 35% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 92% success rate! (— Ugh. —)... Annihilation of the universe is possible! Modifying…

  Bong…? “ ‘Barrierizer’ to go somewhere or other. 49.3% success of application estimated… heuristics 100%. Applied. Cross your fingers.”

  Shhhrip! “Cheat simulating… ‘Bare Necessities’ added to [Conceptual Body]. 98.8% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 100% success rate… cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  Chime! “Simulating projected alterations: Experience 3 equivalent to 13 [Magineer] experience, multiplied to 20 due to status effects. [Mystic Astrolabe] bound item added. [Fire Funnel] spell added.

  “Challenge 3 quest successful: 13 [Goddess] experience gained, multiplied to 15 due to status effect, 16 [Magineer] experience gained, multiplied to 25 due to status effects, and 5 [Saboteur] experience gained, multiplied to 6 due to status effect. [Crowned Tower] spell added. [Wyld Inferno] spell added. [Mark of the Wyld] Special Trait added.

  “Huzzah! [Magineer 9] gained. +20 Maximum MP. [Magical Invention] maximum upgrade already achieved. Free [Wizard] class skill selection (or related general skills) available, maximum ranks +1. [Saboteur 4] gained. [Exploit Weakness] improved to [Exploit Weakness+1].”

  Ting! “[My Devilish Plot All Along] flag triggered. Check! Are you bristling with bootyfull anticipation yet?!”

  Whiiiiiiiiiirr… honk! “Cheat simulating… ‘Strange Phantasm 1’ capability added to Mirroring Duplicates. 100% success of application due to existing protocols and contingencies. Cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  Clonk. “Cheat simulating… ‘Crazy Sister’s Promised Present Package’ added to Quests. 99.8% success of application estimated… contingency error-correcting heuristics 100% success rate… cheat is acceptable and has been applied.”

  This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

  Trumpets sounded like a triumphant victory at war. “Congratulations! That’s all, folks! May you complete the Game, Successor.”

  Ba Dum Tsh! “Just kidding! Get hyped, girl! Get. Fucking. Ready!”

  Ow, ow- wait, what? Oh no, I’m scared now.

  A new feeling to the interface suddenly blossomed — a new link. A less ‘Ozra-polluted’ Director voice declared, “A partial mental synthesis process is required for the final modification. Standard safety protocols have been bypassed and this may be unpleasant, harmful, or fatal. Please ask your doctor about bypassing safety protocols before bypassing safety protocols. Standby…”

  A sudden storm of information flooded Sammy’s already poor, battered brain. Spells. Spells, spells, spells, and more spells. Hundreds. Everything, seemingly, one after the other, burning hot augers of knowledge searing her psyche with ancient, runic brands. The core of magic, the core Rallindin harvested from dross, recompiled, synthesized, cannibalized, reconstituted, and sewed back into reality as new foundations to anchor it. To create cement.

  Whatever contrivance of levels she’d attained, whatever experience she had gained within herself, she wasn’t ready for it. It threatened to sweep her away, just obliterate her with the raw totality of information. It was raw will to resist, contain, and absorb it.

  Hrrrrrrrrraaaaah!

  “You have gained 1 exp in [Magineer] through spell acquisition thanks to [Comprehension: Accelerator].”

  “You have gained 1 exp in [Magineer] through spell acquisition thanks to [Comprehension: Accelerator].”

  “You have gained 1 exp in [Magineer] through spell acquisition thanks to [Comprehension: Accelerator].”

  … over and over and over and over it came, crammed into a tiny fraction of a second, and then a level maxed, and more came. The stupid repetition of the words was not a candle before the bonfire of feeling her mind rewired in tandem.

  Hrrrrrrrrrnnn… please…!

  By some thin margin, she held out a sliver long enough for it to end. Levels mattered… that much was clear. One more drop of it would have been her end. Fortunately, it stopped short.

  “Process successful, Director. Common spells obtained in totality up to your pre-acquisition [Magineer] level of 9 and consolidated into [Allspell]. [Comprehension: Accelerator] has provided a total [Magineer] experience gain of 175 (175 iterations of 1 exp, after rounding).”

  Chime! “To avoid System violations, [Comprehension: Accelerator] has been altered to [Comprehension: Evolver] — beyond level 9, and upon your return to normal outer reality, the experience gain is instead for custom spells only.”

  Chime! “[Magineer 10] gained! +30 Maximum MP. Spellcraft Specialization (Abjurer) upgraded; [Common Ward] added as an enhancement. [Magineer 11] gained! +30 Maximum MP. [Tweak Spell] upgraded by one level to Grandmaster.”

  Ding! “[Tweak Spell: Super Hot] added. [Elemental Mastery] consolidated under [Allspell] as an enhancement. +300 Maximum MP added. [Sponge of Knowledge] changed to [Triangulation of Knowledge].”

  Victory fanfare beeped briefly. “Good luck with the game, Director.”

  Sammy knew she passed out briefly, as the last of the info had an ‘I’m fading as it’s coming’ quality.

  She woke to Azure straddling her, tapping her cheek to rouse her, worry painted on her face.

  Tanjhere, already slapping me around, as promised- wait. No.

  Sammy blinked a few times in waking up fully, as Azure had briefly bowed her head in exhausted relief. “Yeah,” Sammy managed. She wanted to add ‘I’m okay’ but it just didn’t come out.

  We’re out of it. Hell is over. Damn you, Ozra. Damn y- … haha. Hahaha!

  She began laughing hysterically. Uncannily. Partially, just due to surviving everything, and coming out on top (well, Azure was, technically, but that was hardly news). Partially due to beating the whole motherlovin’ thing with total victory, and shiny rewards like a new gleaming garment waiting to be slipped into…

  Her eyes cracking open saw Azure looking at her with concern once more. “What, Samantha?” the Naugite asked. “What is it? Are you… well?”

  “Tch! I’m great!” Sammy called in between chortles. “Bare Necessities! Fffhh- hahahaha!” She squeezed her eyes shut and wheezed, out of breath, slapping her hand on the stony floor. “It’s because — kkrrk — it’s because I was naked! In the fucking jungle!”

  Azure let out a chortle, too, and then they were both laughing. The Naugite flopped next to her as they shared in hysterical amusement and release; the purest of relief.

  Once Sammy collected herself, she sat up and took Azure’s hand. As Azure sat up too, Sammy beamed. “You beat it all, Blueberry. You won! Passed with flying colors. I told you that you could do it! I’m so proud of you.”

  Azure smiled a touch bashfully as she looked away briefly, but finally met Sammy’s eyes and nodded. “Nothing could make me happier than for you to be. I feel deserving of it for once.” A bigger smile. “Fellow Ascendant.”

  “Oh ho! You got it?! Now I’m not so lonely at the top. So. Do you have a magic potion gun now?!”

  “I’m afraid not. It’s been translated into ‘sling’ expertise, but I don’t even get a damn sling. We’ll have to figure it out — or I just use existing great throwing skills. Whatever. You liked that gun more than I did. I caught you playing with it — don’t think I didn’t! Anyway, I also… shot you with it.” She winced.

  “Yes, you did. In the face.” Sammy gave a false admonishing glare for a brief moment, then snorted and brushed it off to rise, pulling up Azure with her. “Water under the bridge. I probably needed it. You’re not a damsel and can handle yourself.”

  “I did. Literally. But let’s save that for another time. As I was told, I still have a mountain to walk in regards to it.”

  “Yeah, our crazy sister said something about you climbing it instead of smashing into it and shattering. Some kind of crap like that.”

  “I bet she’s even wordier and more mysterious than the Fortuneteller, hmm?”

  “Hmmmm. Tough call.” Sammy looked around, noting the sealed and completed door next to them. White, but without any reflection any longer, entirely made opaque. “We’re done here, Blueberry. Let’s go.”

  The next time we — or I — come here, it’ll probably be even crazier. Makes me wonder who equals their importance. But I have plenty to do as it is. I’ll be the Goddess of Magic by then. That much I’m certain of.

  What are occasional shots to the face between lovers? Wait, that didn't come out right...

  Next Chapter...

  Crow continues his investigations.

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