I was ecstatic.

  Finally, after all the time spent sulking in bed, hating everything around me, things were happening. We were finally—finally—getting some shit done.

  We were going to meet Valentin.

  Now, Valentin wasn’t just some "wyer" or "political advisor." That had been Sebastian skimming the damn report like an idiot.

  No. Valentin was a member of parliament. He did work in politics, sure, but he wasn’t some lowly legal clerk. Either way, the pn was simple: introduce ourselves, feel him out, and see if we could get him on our side.

  His pce was in a narrow, crooked street, fnked by dipidated buildings. The stucco walls were gray and crumbling, the windows half-shattered, covered in rusting iron bars. Beneath us, uneven cobblestones cracked under the weight of the city’s decay.

  I asked myself, for the hundredth time, what fucks I even gave about Caruncle’s family.

  Inside, the private salon was a jewel of elegance tucked away from the smelly, suffocating streets. That night, soft amber light bathed the room, cast by low-hanging chandeliers dripping with flickering candles. Pretty, but the constant flickering annoyed the hell out of me.

  The air carried a faint scent of vender, but it was ruined by the disgusting haze of cigar smoke.

  Elena was dressed for business.

  A deep purple velvet frock coat, fitted at the waist with a corset underneath. A mix of the maids' ridiculous obsession with ‘emphasizing curves’ and my insistence on authority.

  The flowing trousers almost resembled a skirt, blurring the lines between masculine and feminine. Beneath the coat, a high-colred white shirt peeked through, its cuffs adorned with ce. Silver buttons gleamed along the front, each one intricately engraved, according to the maids.

  At my insistence, a bck ribbon was tied at the neck.

  Getting the outfit made had been a battle, the maids treating me like I had lost my mind. But in the end? It looked damn good.

  I moved carefully, following every scrap of etiquette I’d learned.

  Every step calcuted. Every gesture deliberate.

  I was alive, and I wanted everyone’s eyes on me.

  Then, I saw him.

  Valentin.

  He stood up.

  His eyes widened.

  "He looks even uglier than I remember."

  Caruncle shrieked.

  For a brief second, I felt his panic, the sharp stab of recognition. Valentin was his brother. And the sight of him—**alive, breathing—**was too much.

  He remembered the corpse. The body in the casket. His own funeral.

  I had to force myself to stay still.

  Valentin took Elena’s hand and pressed a kiss against the back of it.

  His breath lingered a moment too long.

  I kept my expression still. Let him have his moment. Then, as soon as he released me, I let Elena’s hand fall—casual, controlled.

  “I believe we haven’t had the opportunity to meet,” he murmured.

  I tilted my head slightly, letting my gaze sweep over him.

  Sebastian sat to my right, positioned so he could watch me speak. Valentin faced me directly.

  The arrangement was perfect.

  "You haven’t met us, but we’ve heard plenty about you," Sebastian started, his voice smooth.

  He was dressed in bck loafers, a dull green suit, and an old dark tie. I had made sure his clothes were one size too big, just enough to make him look awkward and out of pce. Exactly like Caruncle used to dress when he was alive.

  It was funny.

  “And you might be?” Valentin asked.

  "Miss Elena is Custodio Esparza’s daughter. Have you heard of him?"

  Valentin frowned. "The name sounds familiar, but…"

  “Custodio Esparza is part of the Supernal Circle of Mountain Mystics.”

  The moment Sebastian said the name, Valentin’s expression twisted into barely concealed disgust.

  Fair.

  I couldn’t bme him.

  "Yes," Sebastian continued smoothly, "we are an organization focused on charitable works and the personal enlightenment of our members."

  "Right."

  I fought the urge to ugh.

  "In any case," Sebastian pressed on, "I am here to lend my services to Miss Elena. I am her spokesperson."

  Valentin raised a brow. "Her spokesperson?"

  "Yes. Miss Elena, if you haven’t noticed, is mute. She cannot speak, but she wanted to meet you. That is why I am here."

  Valentin turned his attention back to me.

  I held his gaze, keeping a soft, unreadable smile.

  He studied me for a long moment.

  "That expins why she didn’t answer my greeting, then."

  "That would be correct."

  "Ah. My apologies," Valentin said, "I assumed she was just in a bad mood."

  I waved a dismissive hand, the smile still in pce.

  Valentin nodded. "And might I ask why the dy wished to meet me?"

  Sebastian’s expression didn’t change.

  His voice remained calm.

  "Well, I hope this isn’t too upsetting," he said smoothly, "but we heard of you when one of your employees came looking for your brother at her home."

  The room stilled.

  Valentin’s lips parted slightly.

  His gaze darkened.

  For a brief second, I saw the flicker of recognition—of something buried beneath yers of careful control.

  Then, just as quickly, he schooled his features back into neutrality.

  He leaned back slightly in his chair, folding his hands over the table.

  "I see."

  And just like that, the game had begun.

  Valentin averted his gaze, but I watched him closely.

  His legs were crossed, but the sole of one foot still touched the floor—a position too carefully held. His hand, which had been resting on his right leg, suddenly tightened, gripping his knee with force.

  “Right.” He paused, gncing between us. "The matter of my brother was... a bit of a tragedy. He ran away ten years ago. We searched, but we never found him. If we had known he was this close the entire time, maybe... things would have turned out differently."

  I clenched my teeth.

  Sebastian’s voice remained steady.

  “Miss Elena wanted to offer to move his body, in case you wished to bury him somewhere closer to your family.”

  Valentin’s gaze snapped back to me.

  I opened Elena’s eyes wider, trying to appear compassionate, but I could feel the tears pooling at the back of my mind. Not mine—Caruncle’s.

  It was absurd to offer Caruncle’s body back.

  But it was necessary.

  Valentin exhaled, rubbing his temple. "Right. I'll have to think about that, too. As you might guess, it's... a difficult topic for the family."

  "Of course," Sebastian said smoothly. "But in any case, when we heard about you, we couldn't help but be curious. Miss Elena is looking for people who can introduce her to the capital."

  "The Circle of Mystics doesn't provide that kind of service?" Valentin asked, raising an eyebrow.

  "Not really, no," Sebastian replied. "We like to keep ourselves outside of politics."

  "How so?"

  "Most of us prefer the countryside. That’s all there is to it."

  "Right."

  I tapped my fingers on the table, signaling to Sebastian. It was the first time I had interacted in the conversation at all. The thought bothered me.

  Sebastian picked up on the cue.

  "Miss Elena has heard of your work in parliament. She finds your alignment with the liberal party quite valuable."

  Valentin tilted his head.

  "Alright... although, if she's heard about me, she also knows I'm a busy man."

  "Of course," Sebastian said. "But Miss Elena could be a valuable asset. If your goals align, she is willing to provide the necessary budget."

  For the first time, Valentin hesitated.

  His eyes flickered to me. He frowned, but the expression wasn’t judgment.

  It was puzzled.

  "And she’s willing to finance me... why, exactly?"

  "For the dream of a more independent Luciana."

  Valentin chuckled, shaking his head.

  "Right. I used to have that kind of dream, too, back then."

  "Isn't that what we should all strive for?"

  Valentin exhaled, his smile fading slightly.

  "Listen, I appreciate the sentiment. I really do." He gnced at me, then Sebastian. "But I’ve learned that things aren’t so simple. Governing a country on our own terms is not as easy as people imagine."

  I hesitated.

  I tried to sign to Sebastian, but my hands felt clumsy.

  Independence? I pointed at Valentin, then tapped my fist over my heart—give up? The movement was stiff, unpolished, but it got the message across.

  Sebastian gnced at me. Then, smoothly:

  "Miss Elena asks if you still see Luciana becoming independent in the future."

  Something fshed in Valentin’s eyes.

  A flicker of something buried.

  But he smoothed his expression.

  "Well… it’s not that I don’t see independence as possible," he said slowly. "But I believe there are other ways to improve life here. Without risking everything on the gamble of total autonomy."

  "What paths?"

  I raised both hands—palms up, moving them forward. A silent question.

  Valentin leaned back.

  "You see," he began, "the idea of a federal state is to allow each city, each region, to govern itself. It grants autonomy without the chaos of full secession. The citizens are empowered, but there's still structure. A safety net."

  He flicked his gaze to me. "Centralism, on the other hand, puts all the power in the hands of a few disconnected men. It stifles growth. But complete independence? That’s an even heavier burden than most realize. Federalism—he gestured slightly—"offers freedom in moderation. A compromise that keeps order."

  Then, suddenly, his voice softened.

  He turned to me, his eyes lingering just a moment too long.

  "Forgive me," he said with a small smile. "The pretty dy here probably finds this tiresome."

  I averted my gaze.

  Something shifted.

  Caruncle reacted.

  I hoped they didn’t notice the rush of emotion that suddenly welled up.

  Sebastian, sensing my shift, filled the silence.

  "So… do you still see Luciana becoming independent in the future?"

  Valentin was quiet for a beat.

  Then:

  "It’s not that I don’t see independence as a possibility."

  A pause.

  "But I’ve come to believe there are other ways. A federal system lets us keep the empire’s resources, while gaining self-governance. It’s a compromise—one that, for now, seems more realistic."

  They kept talking.

  But I… stopped listening.

  Because Elena’s tears had started falling.

  They weren’t mine.

  They were Caruncle’s.

  He was so incredibly sad.

  But at the same time—he felt soothed.

  Rexed.

  Do you want to know why?

  We both know why.

  It’s redundant to even say it.

  Valentin saw him for who he was.

  Fine. For who she was.

  Valentin looked at Elena and took her appearance for granted.

  Caruncle was nothing more than a pervert to me.

  A sick, broken man with a loose screw.

  But the way he saw himself?

  Sometimes, it was so intense.

  So overwhelmingly blinding that I…

  I just couldn’t help but give in to it.

  That’s why I have to write it all down. That’s why I have to exorcise his thoughts out of me.

  But whatever. It’s not like it changes anything.

  “Miss Elena? Miss Elena? Are you alright?”

  I came back to earth. Sebastian had stood up and pced a hand on Elena’s shoulders—shoulders I could also feel. I had covered her face with her hands, ashamed of breaking down in front of Valentin.

  “My apologies, was there something I said that upset you, ma’am?”

  I looked upward for an instant and saw Sebastian panicking. I signed the word headache and covered Elena’s face again.

  “No! Sir, actually, we must apologize,” Sebastian quickly added. “Miss Elena has been dealing with a lot of headaches tely, and with the trip here to Vadorreal, things got worse.”

  “I see… Let me ask the clerk to bring her a gss of water.”

  “We would be thankful if you do.”

  Sebastian handed me his handkerchief, and I took it, trying to clean myself up. It was embarrassing.

  Valentin stood up and left the salon. We could hear him calling for someone.

  “Eulia? Eulia! For heaven’s sake! I’ve been calling you for quite a while now!”

  We couldn’t hear the clerk’s response, just Valentin’s voice, growing more irritated.

  “Did you really? I need you here. I’m in a meeting.”

  Silence.

  “Never mind all that. Just bring me a gss of water.”

  He returned, sitting back down with a sigh. “My apologies. Some clerks aren’t particurly reliable. But I asked for a gss of water for Miss Esparza—it should only take a moment.”

  A few minutes ter, the water arrived. I didn’t even look to see who brought it; I was still staring at the table, focusing on steadying my breathing. The problem with possessing a body was that every single sensation controlled me. The difficult breathing, the burning tears, the dizziness—it was overwhelming sometimes. Being alive was overwhelming.

  “Thank you,” I signed.

  I wasn’t sure if I did it right, but Sebastian nodded and transted for me. “Miss Elena says thank you.”

  Valentin was silent for a moment, watching me. He had a cigar between his fingers, half-smoked, the ember glowing faintly.

  “Never mind all that,” he said at st. “Would you prefer if we continued this conversation another time?”

  I hesitated, then shook my head.

  “Well, yes, that’s alright. Would it be okay if Miss Elena writes to you in the following days? I know she wants to speak in her own words—once she’s had some time to rest.”

  Valentin considered this, then reached into his coat pocket, pulling out a finely embossed card. He handed it to me.

  “Here, Miss Esparza. If you wish to send word—my address. I would be most eager to hear from you.”

  The card was disgustingly delicate, cream-colored with his name and office inscribed in needlessly elegant script.

  I stood up and nodded, forcing a small smile. I even gave a slight bow, trying to salvage my dignity.

  “If you need a physician, you can let me know,” Valentin added, his tone softer. “I wouldn’t want to see such a beautiful sight in pain the next time we meet.”

  I nodded again—for what felt like the hundredth time—and finally, we left.

  Sebastian held onto me as I walked, and as soon as we stepped outside, we were greeted by rain. Thankfully, the carriage was waiting, so we got inside right away.

  The journey home was silent.

  I brought my hand to my chest, forming it into a loose fist. With a gentle, circur motion over my heart, I signed sorry.

  “Oh, don’t be, Miss! I know this is really important to you for a reason. We might have cut the conversation short, but I think we actually made some good progress!”

  I sighed, nodding slowly.

  Sebastian hesitated, then spoke again, more cautiously.

  “Now, I know you don’t like to talk about these things… but if you want to tell me what happened back there, maybe I can help. Or maybe I can’t, but at least I can listen. I just—I feel so helpless when I don’t know what to do. Was it really just a headache?”

  I shook my head.

  “Oh… I see.”

  I raised my hand, pointing backward with my thumb—ter. Then I touched my chin and moved my hand outward—talk.

  “We’ll talk about it ter, then.”

  I leaned against the carriage window, watching the blurred city pass by in streaks of rain.

  Caruncle was still shaken. He had stopped crying, but I could feel him retreating into himself, curling up in the deepest parts of my mind. And then—memories.

  He was fourteen. Valentin was ughing, doubled over, as he tied a ribbon around Caruncle’s waist.

  The dress was ridiculous—frilly, pale pink, with puffed sleeves that swallowed his arms. It had once belonged to their mother, and Valentin had dug it out just for this. The gown dragged behind him, absurdly rge, the ce pooling around his feet like a royal train.

  “This is hirious!” Valentin cackled, barely able to catch his breath. “You really do look like a girl!”

  Caruncle never saw himself in the mirror that night. But the words had made him so happy. So inexplicably, painfully, overwhelmingly happy that he couldn’t contain himself.

  And now, all these years ter… Valentin saw him as a woman.

  The thought was dizzying. He saw Elena, took her appearance for granted. There was no hesitation, no questioning, no doubt.

  It was real.

  It was permanent.

  He had presented himself as a stranger, a woman, and there was no going back.

  I could feel his thoughts spiraling, turning into something deeper, something dangerous.

  He didn’t need to see Valentin again. Not after this. Not after the dream had become real.

  Because that was all he had ever wanted.

  And now that he had it, he could die happy.

  Forever.

  For all eternity.

  I sighed.

  What an idiot.