sses e down aurn our attentions to the wonderful meal that Heather had prepared. I stare down at my pte. A pile of mashed potatoes. A chi breast and thigh. A mound of deep green green beans glossy with real butter. A slice of French bread. It was nothing spectacur. Nothing you would put up on Instagram for the envy your friends. A was beautiful. Beautiful because someone had made it with their own hands and shared it with me when I most.

  “Are you okay, Elliot?”

  “Yeah.” I whisper. “I just…haven’t had a meal like this sin…” I sigh. “Sorry. There’s that pity again.”

  There is a long moment of silence as I feel her eyes watg me. There is a shuffle and the scrape of her chair against the floor. The hing I knew Heather wasn’t sitting across from me but to my left. Clearing some spa the table in front of her she moves her meal then reaches out to stroke a gentle hand down my back.

  “Do you need a hug, Elliot?”

  What an odd question. Nobody had ever asked me that before, not since I was little anyway. Despite the strangeness of the request I nod. Leaning over and pullioward her Heather gives me the kind of warm, supportive hug that I didn’t even realize had been missing in my life. I y my head on her shoulder and savor this moment. She smelled like a flde after a Spring rain. Her full bosom was so squishy and pillowy pared to Bir’s or my mother’s. Her rger, softer body and longer arms engulfed me like those women never could. It was different and…surprisingly nice. In fact it was one of the hugs I’d had since, well, ever.

  “I uand.” She says softly. “Really I do. When someone you love is taken from you suddenly, uedly, there’s no time to process it. They’re just gone one day and your world is different.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Since Alexander passed I have those moments. A sound, a color, a smell, it be the most innocuous things. And for just a sed…they’re still alive. Always at the most ued times.”

  “Yes. Yes!” It was like she reading the words buried in my heart. Ses I’d struggled to express since my parent’s crash. I stay very still, wishing this friendly hug might st a little longer. “You…fet that they’re gone. You just…fet.”

  “And you think of something that yoing to tell them the ime you see them. A joke or news story they’d be ied in hearing or something important that you o talk about with them.”

  “And then you remember.”

  “It’s almost like losing them all ain. Isn’t it?”

  “Yeah.” I whisper. “It’s just like that.”

  “Just between you and I, I had one of those times just a moment ago.”

  “You did?”

  “Yes.” She says. “It’s been a long time since I cooked a meal for an attractive man that I wasn’t reted to. Or shared it with him. A very long time.”

  “Oh. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” She rubs my back, harder this time, as she breaks . “And it’s good for me.” With a warm smile she pats my arm. “Eat. You’ll feel better with a full tummy.”

  “Yes Ma’am.” I nod, already feeling a hell of a lot better than I did a minute ago. “Thank you.” Taking her knife and fork she starts in on her chi as I take a mouthful of delicious beans. So good! I’d fotten how much better fresh was pared to frozen. Why hadn’t Bir and I made food like this? The bit of effort was more than made up for in how good it tasted. I make a o myself to cook for her if she ever took me back. “So, um, how are your kids? You said Lily was in a residency?”

  “Yes she is.” She says with pride. “Just started her residenty this year. One of the youo ever get there that fast. She’s so smart.”

  “Urology?”

  “Bdder, kidneys, male bits and bobs.”

  I chuckle. “Bits and bobs? That’s cool.”

  “And Liam, well, he’s still figuring things out.”

  “Oh?” I say, genuinely curious as to the fate of my former bully.

  “He got his degree in business ma then took off to Europe for a ‘gap year’.” Her tone of void the way she finger quoted ‘gap year’ made it clear that she was not a fan of that decision. “He hasn’t been back since. He met a girl in Germany. I think they’re in Pal now. I don’t have a clue how they’re making it. As far as I know he just picks up odd jobs here and there and she doesn’t work at all.”

  “Well…that certainly sounds like an adventure.”

  “Mmm. Must be nice.” She sips her wine. “So, Bir. That’s yirlfriend?”

  “Ex-girlfriend.” I clear my throat and take a sip myself. “She kicked me out today. I, um, wasn’t pulling my weight.”

  “Sounds like a on theme. Sg off at work. Sg off at home. Sg off on your looks and hygiene.”

  I bow my head. “Yes Ma’am.”

  She chews doiece of chi as she tio look at me. “So what are you going to do about it?”

  “Uh…I don’t know.” I shrug. “Try harder I guess.”

  “Nope.”

  “No?”

  “You’re not going to try. Yoing to do. And ‘harder’? Harder at what?”

  “Um…”

  “I’ll tell you what yoing to do.” She says. “Yoing to get a good meal and a good night’s sleep. Yoing to wake up in the m and shower and shave and brush your teeth and put on a set of clothes. And then yoing to look at yourself in the mirror and smile. Even if you don’t feel like it. Yoing to smile and say something kind. From now on you will do that every m.”

  “Erm.” I bristle. “Respectfully, I appreciate everything you are doing for me. But…”

  “Is this where you tell me to fuck off again?”

  “Um…no, Ma’am.”

  “You aren’t going to do those things for me, Elliot. You’ll do them for yourself.”

  “Erm…”

  “So you are up and looking good. You’ll have a good breakfast before you leave. Then what are you doing?”

  “Uh…look for a job I guess?”

  “You guess? No, no, no.” She waves her fork. “You need a pn. crete steps. Where will you look for a job?”

  “Errr…” Her blunt questioning had me reeling. Unlike Bir or my friends she swatted away my usual vague evasions like a pesky fly. “…online?”

  “Where? What site?”

  “Um…”

  “Do you have a resume?”

  “Somewhere, but…”

  “Is it up to date?”

  “No, but…”

  “It’s old news anyway. You need a fresh start.” Setting down her fork she turns to me, giving me her eention. “I will tell you what you going to do tomorrow. Yoing to write yourself a new resume. On it yoing to list your strengths.”

  “What strengths?”

  Without a pause she unches into it. “You are polite, when you want to be. That’s people skills. You are a quick learner, I saw it with carving the chi. You’ve got initiative, volunteering to fix my microwave. And speaking of that, you are teically savvy. Meically ined you’ll put, that’s a big one. You take dire well, team pyer. You up nice, professional appearance. And you aowledge your past failures, accepts responsibility. And that’s just the stuff I see after an hour.”

  “I…don’t have a puter or…”

  “Do you have a library card?”

  “Library card? Yeah. Never use it though.”

  “You’ll use it tomorrow.” She states. “There is a branly five blocks from here. They’ve got puters and printers and i access and everything you’ll hey’ve even got some resources there for job searches. You’ll ask a librarian for help. There is ohere named Myles. He’s balding and usually has his reading gsses hanging around his neck. He’ll get you going properly.”

  “Myles.”

  “I’ll call him on my lunch break.” She says. “Just to make sure you did it.”

  Damn she was nosy! Overbearing and bossy too! Some might even say she was a bitch. But right now, as lost and alone as I was, I felt like I could use a little bossing around. In fact…I kinda liked it. I kinda .

  “Do you have references?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Have you checked in on them retly?”

  “Well…not really. No.”

  “You’ll call them. Reed make sure they’re still solid. Who knows, they might know of an opening.”

  “I doubt it.”

  “Do it!” She insists. “If you need another one you use me.”

  “Oh!”

  “Do you know what kind of job you are after?”

  “Uh…whatever I get?”

  “That’s right.” She says. “You’re ft broke and out of options. Right now getting an ine is your top priority. This is no time to be proud or picky. If it pays and you start right away, it’s good. Once you’ve got your feet under you you reassess things but right now time is of the essence.”

  “Uhm…”

  “Just say ‘Yes, Ma’am’.”

  “Yes, Ma’am.”

  “Good man.” She says. “Once you are done doing all the ouff yoing to print out some physical copies of your resume, as many as you afford. You’ll have a good breakfast in your tummy so you skip lunch. Start vasing an area on foot. You’ll hit every pce you , help wanted signs or not, but be realistic about it. And you’ll keep going until you’ve distributed them all.”

  “Okay.”

  “And if you run out and you’ve still got some energy in ys, you just start going into pces and shaking hands. Talk to the managers. Head up. fident smile. Let them know that you start immediately.”

  “Head up. fident smile.”

  “Then, when you are done all of that, you will call your old job and try to get it back.”

  “I ’t…!”

  “You and you will.” She snaps. “Set a time for it. Let’s say 3pm.”

  “M would be better.” I mumble.

  “Then do it in the m. 10 am. Sharp. Be humble but not a doormat. Be trite but fident. Stay on point. And DON’T py the the victim. Aowledge what you’ve done wrong ahem that you’ll do better. Say it and mean it.”

  “Say it and mean it.”

  “As you always should. If they won’t take you baothing is lost. That’ll be your whole day.” She says. “Until you get a job your full-time job is getting a job. Uand?”

  “Yes, Ma’am!” Her fidence was iious! Her call to a inspiring! I knew damhat all her well-meaning pns would fall apart the moment I stepped outside the door tomorrow but for the moment she had me almost believing I could do it.

  “And when you’ve done all you …” Taking up her fork and knife she returns to her meal. “…you will e back here.”

  “Here?” I say, my hopes rising.

  “Somewhere in your travels you will pick up that door thingy you were talking about.” She gobbles down a scoop of mashed potatoes. No little nibbles for her, not like Bir, this was a dy with a healthy appetite. “I’ll give you ten dolrs before you leave. IF…you fix my microwave tomorrow you’ll have earned yourself anht here.”

  “Oh! Oh! Thank you, Mrs. Hutton!”

  “One night.” She says pointedly. “That’s it. For the repair it will be worth it. But I’m not running a charity here. I’ve got all I handle just looking after myself here. The st thing I need around here is a charity case. Okay? For your own sake you o fix up quick, Elliot.”

  “Yeah. I uand.” I nod, overjoyed at having anht’s reprieve from homelessness. I take her hand and give it a squeeze. “Thank you, Mrs. Hutton!”

  She grins, and was that a blush I see? “Don’t thank me. Just do what I said.” She says. “I’m going to want to hear all about your day tomorrow evening. And I intend on cheg up on your story. I’ll want to see that call at 10 am on your phone.” Her talk was tough but her palm was soft as she gives my hand an encing squeeze. “If I discover that you are lying to me, well…I am afraid that we won’t be able to be friends anymore. If there is ohing I ot stand more than pity it’s dishoy.”

  “I uand, Mrs. Hutton.” I say as her hand slips from mine. “I will do what you say. I promise.”

  “You better.” She smiles. “I am not a woman to be trifled with.”

  “I believe you!” We share a ugh and k sses for another drink. With all these good feelings swirling I am feeling a bit brave so I risk a question that had been on my mind since she’d brought it up. “Hey, um, Mrs. Hutton?”

  “Yes, Elliot?”

  I go her rich browhen right back down to my gss. “Do you really think that I am attractive?”