The Khajit scrambled to position, an arrow striking where the leaders head had been a second ago. The bandits rushed out, equal to our number. They were ill equipped and with the advantage of surprise gone they should have abandoned the attack but still they rushed out. I faced off against a bandit thug with a rusty looking greatsword. I waited for his attack, once he committed I took a step back, his attack fell short but his added momentum brought him close to my range, dashing forward I nded two clean sshes with Dragonsting before whirling away to his side. Instinctively he tried to bring the greatsword around for another attack which is what I had been waiting for. I kept turning to the right and again his attack missed leaving him unbanced. I hamstrung him with one attack before sshing across his throat with the other
These thoughts weighed heavily on my mind as I walked into Whiterun. I had changed again, this time favouring a simpler light blue dress as the sensibilities of Whiterun were less ostentatious than those of Solitude, a simple white thong y underneath. My mind still troubling me I decided to be honest with myself and accept that even if I could find Therin his power and ability to cosy up to those in authority may make it impossible for me to force him to undo the damage that had been done. I wiped away a tear at the first true realisation that I could be stuck this way.
With this in mind I knew I would have to build bridges with people, I owned a home here in Whiterun and with changing fortunes may never earn enough to buy another home elsewhere. Resolved, I walked toward the Bannered Mare, curious looks followed me as I was recognised. Walking into the common room I noticed Mikael just finishing a song:
“For the age of aggression is just about done.”
I walked straight toward him, out of the corner of my eye I noticed a man nudge and wink at his drinking partner.
“Why look who it is, the girl who wanted to py at being an adventurer until she took a dive in the mood and was stripped before the whole city! I see you are now in a dress, it seems I showed you your pce, or are you here for a rematch?”
Despite his words there was a slight nervous tremble to his free hand as if expecting a fist to fsh across his jaw. Instead of this I offered him a meek bow, my hands csped submissively below my waist. It burned me to do this but I needed a resolution with Mikael if I would make a life here, the only other way would be to win a fist fight which after st time I would not risk again. A second loss would ruin me. Still in my bow, my face pointed at the floor I spoke:
“I… I, haaah… I am here to apologise.” I noticed the trembling in his hand stop.
“I shed out at you, misjudged you and your intentions. I was foolish and out of line. You taught me a valuable lesson and in truth I am grateful to you. Truly I beg your pardon, please?”
I was aware of him staring down at me, also suddenly aware that the top of my bosom was straining against the dress. My face flushed. The whole tavern had gone deathly quiet and the silence seemed to st an age.
“Hmm your words seem sincere and yet…”
My heart sank.
“… And yet your posture needs work. You beg you say? That doesn’t look like begging to me.”
Making myself a further source of ridicule had not been my pn, if I were to walk away now people would probably sympathise with me. I had after all come here on good faith but then I judged the mood in the room. Whatever the rights and wrongs I sensed that they wanted more, the entertainment had just begun, if I were to walk away I would ruin that. Any spreading word of me would not be fttering. Just one more indignity might yet yield another route for me should I need it. Pausing only a moment longer I sank to me knees, and looked up at Mikael to wait his cue.
“Well, did you have something you wanted to say to me?” Light ughter echoed in the silence. Just over Mikael’s shoulder I noticed Uthgerd looking on in disgust. With a stab of guilt, I continued.
“Please, I wronged you I beg of you to forgive me.” I stared into his cruel, petty eyes. My self-loathing outweighing any anger I felt toward him. I was only dimly aware of the tears streaming down my face.
“Kiss my feet and we shall call it even.” He ughed.
Once more I decided I would yield, yet as I reached toward his foot he backed away and walked a few steps away from me.
“Crawl.”
The ughter was louder now, taken up by more throats. And so I crawled. I had hoped that the new form would shield me, that I could pretend in my mind that it was not me. It was not me crawling, it was not my choice but that of somebody else. Yet, pcing a kiss on his feet, I knew that this in some way represented a small part of myself that had been locked away. Overwhelmed by machismo and warrior machinations this passive side of myself had never had chance to grow. But the warrior in me was now cursed and the suppressed submissive part had grown. No sooner had I pced the kiss than I jumped to my feet and ran to the exit. Desperate to get away, I ran all the way to Breezehome yet could not outrun the shame that followed me. I did nothing for the rest of the day. I slept a fitful night before leaving on the morning, heading to the market. Yet it seemed my foolish gambit had paid off. Sure, there were mocking smiles and snide chuckles, these were outdone by looks of sympathy. I had, in a hard way earned a pce for myself in Whiterun should I need it. A part of me still hoped I would not need it and I focused on what I had come here to do. Find Therin and persuade him somehow to change me back.
I made my way to Dragonsreach and sought out the court mage Farengar.
“Excuse me, have you by any chance seen the mage Therin?”
“Therin? Why do people always ask for Therin? I have been the court wizard here for ten years now and suddenly this stranger swans in and the Jarl ups and decides I need help. That I am distracted by my ‘obsession’ with dragons. Obsession?! When they are swooping in left and right, people sucking their souls out. That’s not an obsession that is current events. He’s sneaky mark me, seems to spend a lot of the Jarl’s gold. All on magic protection for the city he says, will cut a dragon right out of the air. HA! I know his-“
I realised I would need to cut him off or be there all day
“Ye,s but have you seen him recently?”
“Sure, he’s where he always at, up top on the balcony. Says his Sky defence research works better there. Say, what’s your interest in him anyway?”
“My interest is my own, I’ll be going now.”
I sensed that I had not dissuaded him from prying further, no sooner had I turned away from him than I heard him move quickly away toward the Jarl’s throne room. Moving quickly myself I reached the balcony and walked forward to see a figure in blue robes. I had brought Dragonsting with me. Seeing him look busy I picked up a nearby tray and made believe I may be a serving girl and walked toward him. As I got within ten feet however I stopped. My body suddenly unable to move, a paralyzing spell had me held tight.
“Ah Dragonborn, you have arrived. You were… taller when st we spoke? Hahaha” I couldn’t tell what annoyed me more. My sudden paralysis or his ughing at his own jokes. The spell began to wear away but I knew that the paralysis had simply been a dispy of power not a genuine need for caution.
“If you would be so kind as to throw your dagger over here” Again this was a mere power py but I complied having no other recourse.
“I must confess I was shocked when I received Belgarth’s letter, don’t judge him he is after all just looking after his daughter. That the mighty Dragonborn had been transformed such. I knew my former apprentice was incompetent but I could not have guessed that he would do this to you?”
“So you set this all up?! How, why?”
“I’m just supposed to tell you my pn? Very well, it’s so rare I get chance to be honest with people. Since I was a boy I have been obsessed with eternal life. Living forever as the Altmer of ages past did. So I began to research using my family’s wealth and power to accumute resources and papers that I may have needed. Eventually I was led to the legend of Prospero, the Nordic sorcerer who had achieved eternal life. This brought me to Skyrim. Through my research at Belgarth’s manor I realised I needed the essence of a hero and so allowed Belgarth to escape knowing he would track down the nds most renown warrior. He had often talked of you with his daughter Helena in excitement as they heard the test bard songs and tales of your exploits. What I had not pnned was for you to best me, luckily, I always have a contingency; the curse. Knowing your only solution would be to go to the mage college and seek out my errant apprentice the only thing he could do would be to extract your essence into a soul gem. I had believed the process would kill you but here you are.”
“Please, change me back. I’ll do anything. I-“
He was shaking with ughter.
“Change you back? Priceless. Once I learned of your survival I had thought you might seek me out with such a hope, though in truth I did not expect such a lovely transformation.”
“Are you saying you won’t or can’t”
“Both. The essence needed to change you back I have every intention of using to secure my own immortality. It has taken me years to research and find the missing pieces, only this remains. That is the won’t. But my dear, you do not realise how lucky you were to survive the process the first time around. Even cursed your body, mind spirit and soul were still strong. Any attempt to undo what has now been done, in your current form, would kill you. You no longer have the vitality to survive being stripped back so far.”
I was not aware at what point during this revetion. Utter defeat washed over me, to be stuck this way for my remaining days. My grand destiny gone, so much of purpose defeated. To be a permanent object of lust. I was crushed by the impending fate, of having to choose to simper or be put down. Vaguely I became aware of him speaking again.
“- I will ask you again where is it? Where is the soul- hmm could it be that you were stupid enough to bring it with you?”
He reached for my little pack, I did not even try to stop him opening it up he lifted out the soul gem and cried in triumph.
“THIS IS IT? AFTER ALL MY YEARS OF SEARCHING! AND- wait, what have we here?”
He rummaged further and pulled free the book given to me by Visarmo and began to read the note
“My, my, my Dragonborn perhaps you should be thanking me for your change hmm? It seems you have derived some pleasure from it, and what gift has he give- this is it?”
He pulled it open, the page naturally falling on the st read scene.
“You know, there was a second part of my pn, for what is eternity without someone to share it with. I knew that within this py lead the secret to finding a woman suitable. Helena, beautiful as she was resisted any spell of control. Yet this makes perfect sense, someone that can hold more than one soul? Why you would simply need to pce a dominant piece of your own within the bride and- now who do I know that can hold more than one soul. Oh Dragonborn, it seems my interest in you has just begun, and you have handed it right to me. To think how much of the fool Jarl’s resources I wasted to try and exert pressure to get this text to me without success and then you bring it right along. Why its as if-“
“STOP RIGHT THERE THERIN!”
I turned to see the Jarl of Whiterun and his bodyguard along with Farengar and a whole cadre of Whiteurn guards standing at the entrance of the entrance to the balcony.
Not wasting time Therin ran to the balcony, just before leaping off he shouted back
“We will meet again Dragonborn, find me in Windhelm.”
With that he leaped into the open sky yet I knew that through some trick of magic he would survive.
The Jarl walked toward me, staring long and hard.
“Dragonborn? So for once the rumours are actually true, the nds greatest warrior has been turned into a little girl.
My whole world feel for what seemed the hundredth time. There would be no stopping this getting out, where rumours had existed from a single eye witness now many guards would talk. I was known in this form around Whiterun, my description would spread. People far and wide would- oh gods, Whiterun! The site where I had been stripped, and humiliated by a bard no less. No doubt he would soon be singing a new song in my honour.
“Y,y,yes Jarl, it’s true.” So in a shaking voice I expined all, the guards listening in intently. When I was done the jarl spoke.
“It was a noble thing you did but foolish, the nd needed a hero not a little girl, two little girls I suppose counting you and this Helena. I cannot track Therin down in Windhelm without decring my city for a side in the war. That I will not do. If there is anything left of what you once were you must be the one to find him and end this madness you have started.”
With that he walked away, I left Dragonsreach and retuned home. Seeing my Houscarl Lydia on route I tried to catch her eye but she spat in disgust, shame in her eyes.
Over the next week I remained in Whiterun trying to decide my next course of action. The people of Whiterun did not mention the test revetion about me but their eyes followed my every step, there were many whispered conversations behind hands. Mikael was making excellent money with his various new balds: “The undoing of the Dragonborn’ ‘A Bard and a Dragonborn’ and the Dragonborn’s Breasts’ amongst others.
I found myself at a loss, the Jarl urged me to finish ‘the madness I had started’ and yet I had no means to do this. As a warrior, he had out witted me, as a woman he had overpowered me. Clearly, he wanted me to seek him out again. Yet what else could I do, I felt one way or another this would haunt. I needed a resolution. Against all my better judgement I resolved to go to Windhelm and see what more he wanted though I had the sickening thought that it was connected to the legend of Darlia. I would know soon enough.