The giant ant clacks its front pinchers together trying to reach me, but my pawsome leap dodges the effort, I’m too fetching for these pests. Not only am I light on my paws, but with the most powerful jaws, I grab a leg daring to poke at me. Pulling it back, I make the nasty thing fall down even on its many hairy pointy paws. It clicks and clacks again trying to reach me, but bouncing away again I can almost hear its barking mad frustration..

  As a tail-wagging hero of the world, I can do anything!

  Another ant-agonizing intruder scurries up to help but they’re all paw-sitively outmatched.

  Pouncing on the first one with my claws spread out to hurt it, smashing it keeps it on the ground and it can’t get up anymore. Its friend comes up also trying to defend its people. With a snarl so fierce it would make a wolf proud, it cowers in fear as it gets closer. Two of its ant friends join soon after, but I will not be stopped. Jumping onto the back of the one that is scared of me, I grab and yank off one of its legs. It squeals, but it is ok, it has many more. I grab a leg on its other side and pull. Its friends try to help scratching at the big one I am on, but they can’t reach me the way they want. Their claws scrape against the thick skin, but miss me because I jump up high and land hard on this other one, all of its paws spread out and it stops moving.

  Its other friends squeak in anger, but still can’t reach me. They circle their friends, but I am such an amazing fighter, I wait till they are far from each other, and jump at the smaller one. Its front claws bite down, but don’t hurt because my fur is so thick and has many scars already. I bite it back on its face, and it stops moving.

  The last ant with them comes after me, but I leap away, my legs being so strong, it needs to run to catch up for a few seconds while I get ready for it. Growling at it, it dips back and cowers just like all of its friends. I turn, letting out a deep growl, and it freezes. Just like all its friends, it knows I’m the top dog.

  They are trying to hurt my people, and my people will be defended, to the death if necessary, but these things don’t have a chance because….

  I wake to the smell, the unmistaken smell of my home.

  You know, as a pack, we might not smell great. Someone should open a window.

  It’s funny in a way only paw-fessionals like us would understand.

  The first time the door outside opens after a long dark sleepy time, the blast of fresh air makes the place smell better. Inside, though, the scent-sational stink is so strong it’s hard to tell one puppy pal from another in the crowd around me. Sometimes it is even hard to think. At least we’ll know if we come from the same big house, there is no mistaking this smell.

  My name is No.

  It’s not a weird name, I hear it all the time! The humans seem to say it every time I try to do something fun, so I guess that’s it.

  Sadly I have been in a small room with my own bed and a hole in the ground where a lot of the bad smells go, for a long time. I get food many times, and so much water, all of the water I can drink, but it doesn’t taste very good. There are many little rooms with other pack members in them, humans have us in different rooms, I think it would be really fun to have us all together.

  Playing with so many new people makes my day go by quicker, they walk by, and when I can go outside when someone wants to play, smelling the nice air makes me feel better, so playing nice with the humans is in our best interest. It is really nice sometimes when I can stay outside with one of my other brothers or sisters, but the smell on us is so bad, it is hard to play together. Some days it is hard to be happy about meeting another human though, some are mean, and bong my head, or brush my skin really hard. They don’t seem to understand me when I tell them I don’t like it.

  When I get to walk outside with the tall human, I don't know what to call him, he takes me around the big building where I live, so many humans to see when I can be walking all over. They want to pet me and say crazy gibberish things. It is cute when they think they can talk.

  Each time though, I have been taken back inside where I can see some of my friends. I stop to try to say hi, but get pulled to get back home pretty often. I am moved to different little places inside the home, but they are all the same, just small rooms with a place for water and food when the humans bring it to me.

  This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

  There are other fur-friends here, too. I can hear them in their own rooms, their tails thumping, paws scratching, or voices joining in the nightly howl-a-thon. I’d love it if we could all play together. Imagine the paw-sibilities! But the humans keep us apart most of the time.

  Still, when one of them comes to take me outside, it’s the best part of my day. The air out there is so fresh, and the ground feels amazing under my paws—it’s like stepping into a dream. I get to meet new humans, too. They pat my head, scratch behind my ears, and say things like, well I’m not sure what they say, but I’m sure they are really trying, but their dog accent is just way off Their strange gibberish makes me laugh on the inside—humans think they’re so clever, but they’re still learning to speak!

  When playtime is over, I always get brought back to my little room. It’s not bad, but the sniff-ometer in here is off the charts. Spot’s room is nearby, and let me tell you, his fart-tillery is a major contributor to the stink. Lilly’s on the other side, and she tries to keep her corner neat, but even her best efforts can’t fix this place.

  At night, we all talk about the humans we meet. Raven brags about the small human she played with last week. Mario tells us about a pair of humans who seemed nice but didn’t stay long. Lilo has high hopes for an adult human who smelled like flowers, but we all agree—it’s hard to know what humans are really thinking.

  One day, I meet a small human boy. He comes with a tall human who doesn’t seem interested in playing, but the boy? He’s paw-sitively thrilled! There are some little balls to play with in the small water pool and he throws them for me to get. Bringing them back to him, he throws them again, like some strange person, I bring them so that he can have them, we have plenty of them. Silly human, I’m trying to give you some of my toys.

  Thinking it goes really good, it is still hard to tell with the humans. The boy’s owner or maybe his alpha does not want to play at all. We play outside for a tiny amount of time and then the tall man brings me back in. The smell of our home hits me like a wall when I walk in this time. I look over at Spot’s and Lilly’s rooms again, Spot nods to say hi. Sitting back down on my bed, I see the boy walk away and say some gibberish again. I was hoping to walk away with another pack, but this pack is also my family.

  We are stuck in small rooms, but I know them all, and in the middle of the night, we talk about the humans that we have seen more than once. At night, Raven says that she played with one of the smaller humans, but when she describes the human, it isn’t the same one that I played with. Mario says he played with a male and female and it went pretty good, but doesn’t know if they’ll come back to play more. Lilo says that she was playing with an adult human female that she was hoping would take her home, but also isn’t sure.

  The next day after I wake up, the human boy is there with his alpha again after breakfast. He wants to play again, so I wag my tail and let my tongue hang out showing that I am having fun. With the human boy, I am, his alpha, though, is paws-off creepy. I try to have fun with him, and he barely moves. He has a smile on his face, but it stays there and sort of looks fake. Humans don’t smile like this one. It has me worried more, the alpha probably decides if we get to go to his home. We play some more and I go back into my little room. He takes out another, Raven, and she tries to be very nice with him also, but who knows, humans are complicated.

  After another bath, I am taken to the human in white, one of the most dangerous beings ever. We always feel either tired, hurt, sick, or all three when we leave one of them. They still let us go home, but they must do terrible things to us. Sometimes it is a male, sometimes a female, but they always wear white. This time, the nice people give me tasty food, but I feel a little sick after each time. I do feel a little queasy when I leave this time, but I see the human boy again, he did come back to play with me.

  But then, I see the boy again. Seeing him makes all the discomfort disappear. He’s like a ray of sunshine, his smile so bright it could light up the darkest corners of home. These humans so many times start to look the same since I have been in this home for so many sleep times, but this human seems different. The smile on its face looks as bright at the morning sun.

  The door slides open from my home and the tall man brings me into the little hall on the way to go outside, going out to play as usual. We go outside, I make the most out of the time again, it is hard to get away from the strong smells inside, but the alpha human still doesn’t seem like he wants to play, the smaller human still does. Chasing me around the little yard, I go get the ball for him to keep, but he keeps throwing it away, making me go get it again.

  All too soon, we are done playing, and I make it back into my little room for another nap.

  Waking up from the nap, the door to my room is sliding open, the screeching loud noise makes my ears hurt, but the human is standing outside with a smile across his face. He waves me outside of my room, and we are obviously going to play again. I am pooped after running out from before, so I’m still resting on the bed, but waving me out, the human seems to insist. Slowly walking out of the room, they put one of the rope things on me to keep me close. The blue sky stretches forever, and the air smells so fresh it’s like I’m sniffing a dream come true. There is a big stone walkway with lots of those metal things that humans ride in.

  I didn’t get to say goodbye to most of my friends, but they’ll understand…. I hope.