Chapter 1 – What the fork?

  I feel cold. I can’t see a thing. Is this death? The last thing I remember is… the wall in front of me disintegrating in a flash of light. If something like that didn’t kill me, that’d be weird.

  But, then again, if I have thought, can this be called death? What they call life is simply something that is born, grows, and dies. I suppose; therefore, the prerequisite is birth? Am I about to be born? Do souls lose memories after they are born into a new body? Am I a soul?

  I can’t see anything… I can only feel coldness… It is silent, I taste nothing, smell nothing. Am I alive if the only thing that exists for me is thought and cold? A feeling of pressure interrupts my musings, turning me to a panicked mess. Am I being born? Am I dying? Is something wrong? What is happening… I would cry, but, I don’t have control over my body, if I have one at all.

  A short time later, the pressure disappears. This doesn’t feel like birth... not that I remember my last one. Yet again, a feeling of pressure comes upon me. Then… a feeling of wetness seeping into me, like my entire being is drenched in liquid, followed by an intense pressure bordering upon pain.

  …Or is it? I can’t feel even a twinge. After a moment the pressure is relieved, but instead I have this revolting feeling as the liquid drenches me and the weight on me is pulled, sucked off and out of me. This definitely isn’t birth.

  What, then, is it? A long time later, a lot of erratic pressure, moisture, pulling, pushing, sucking, with nothing more presenting itself, I am despairing for my future. Why? What did I ever do to deserve this? Is it what I didn’t do? Should I have donated to charities? Gone to church? Help-

  My musings are broken as, instead of darkness, a large grey rectangle resides within my awareness.

  Well. That was unexpected. To think that through all that, a simple thought of ‘help’ – another rectangle layers over the first, saying the same thing. I could see this getting annoying real fast, so I try thinking ‘general information’, which seems to work.

  That’s a disturbing quantity of ‘existential equivalent’s. Okay, first, let’s close all windows. The grey rectangles disappear, leaving my awareness a perfect nothing again. That worked, now - options.

  What the heck? That’s strangely deep. Well, I suppose the only answer to that is life, isn’t it?

  Well that’s ominous. Suppose I should check that out soon. But first! Close all windows! Help! Wait a minute. I wonder if- Help help. On top of the help window that had already appeared, another appeared.

  Huh. Close window. Available commands. The help help window disappears, revealing the help window below.

  Not much there, huh? Well, status it is then.

  I’m a fork. That’s it! I demand a redo! I’m picking death, where’s the options!

  …………..Looks like I’m a fork then. Wait, there are options for the options menu? Huh. Close window.

  Nothing useful here then, back to general, command sensitivity.

  Wow. It’s a bigger coincidence that I didn’t open a window earlier, then. Let’s change it to speaking/thinking with intent. And colour… kinda want it to be blue, but grey is fine, really. Hey, if I’m a fork, does that mean all those weird feelings earlier were someone holding me and using me to eat? Ugh. I hope I was washed. Think about something else. Status.

  Hm. No name? Suppose I can pick one then? I’ll do that later. No gender? Well, I am a fork, I suppose. Age … does that mean 1 week since I was reincarnated as a fork, or 1 week since the creation of this fork body? No STR or DEX, obviously. Dunno whether to feel insulted that my wisdom is so low compared to my intelligence or happy that my intelligence is so high. Charisma… I’m an ugly fork. Or is it that forks don’t look good in the first place, so they don’t have high CHA? Luck… can’t tell if that’s high or low… I’ve taken a bit of damage, but not much.

  Now, let’s see these titles!

  Well. I don’t know what I expected, but this is not it. This is just depressing. Even the system is saying my existence is bland. Think positive. Gotta stay positive. I can’t collapse. If people are less likely to notice me, that’s better, right? And I got a couple stat boosts from that title, right? But as I am now, I’ll be doomed to live as a kitchen utensil… no, I can’t give up yet. There’s still hope in skills, right? Huh. It kinda feels weird now the window isn’t changing every time I say a wrong word. Titles, Skills.

  Finally, an OP skill! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Wait, that means I can’t do anything unless I happen to get some food from something with useful skills. Dang.

  Novel Discord,