Chapter 5: From Today Onwards, Be A Rich Person

  Thanks to Lin Taiping's timely intervention, what could have been a tragic night battle ended up as a farce, at least for the Ox-Headed people.

  Although they didn't catch a Dark Elf, after the Minotaur people chased them out, they unexpectedly caught several mounts left behind by the Dark Elves, including a rare Swift Dragon... Hmm, what's rare means is that Tuluo drooled and swore that he had never eaten the meat of such a creature before!

  Two hours later, the Cow Head tribe, who were originally worried about food, had a fragrant barbecue, and as the biggest contributor to this battle, Lin Taiping was naturally invited to join the barbecue party and played the role of chef again.

  Pan-fried meat, stir-fried diced meat, simmered meat soup. He wielded a rusty kitchen knife, busily and cheerfully in front of the stove. Next to him was a chatty cow that kept talking nonsense: "Lin! I swear to the dark god, from now on, you are the most honored friend of our Bull Head tribe... By the way, when do we eat?"

  "Hmm, so this is the key point after all." Lin Taiping looked at it with great disdain, yet couldn't help but stroke his chin, "Right, you haven't told me yet, why giving birth to a Dark Elf child is such a terrifying thing."

  "This... " Turo's face was full of weird expressions as he stroked the cow horn, and it took a long time before he stammered out, "Actually, having children with Dark Elves isn't scary, what's scary is having children with a group of Dark Elves. Do you know how terrifying those women are?"

  Alright, according to Tulu's account, the Dark Elves have always been that way, and they are all women. They have always captured men from other tribes for ***, using this forced method to reproduce, and the offspring born with the characteristics of Dark Elves.

  What's worse, they don't have any concept of monogamy. As long as some poor guy falls into their hands, he'll be swarmed by a large group of dark elves... What? You say it's romantic to face a group of beautiful women? Fine, try saying that after you've been gang-raped over ten times!

  So, the men who have fallen into the hands of the Dark Elves have only two fates: either they are used until they are exhausted and die, or they are killed after completing their reproductive tasks. In this case, the person who has been specifically named by the leader of the Dark Elves is likely to become a human breeding machine.

  "Is that so?" Lin Taiping heard this and thought of the scene where he was surrounded by a large group of seductive dark elves tearing his clothes, and suddenly couldn't help but shudder. "Uh, I do love beauties, but reverse push plus group push, I just can't take it."

  "Isn't it scary?" Toru looked at him with great sympathy, but then patted his chest and said, "However, Lin, you can rest assured that we will do our best to protect you. At most, when those women come to catch you, we'll take the lead and cut you down first, so they won't be able to take you back."

  Get out! Lin Taiping couldn't help but roll his eyes, and suddenly had the urge to chop down this cow with a knife: "Meow meow, if I'd known it was like this, I wouldn't have agreed to cook for you guys. If those women found out I roasted their mounts, they'll definitely evolve from dark elves into great demons."

  In fact, just as he had guessed, tens of miles away on a small hill, the Dark Elf leader gritted his teeth and turned back, looking at the distant smoke rising from afar. His shoulders were trembling with rage: "Human, you dare...you actually dare...How detestable! I will make you give birth to children for us until you die!"

  Ah-choo! It was as if he felt a grievance from tens of miles away, Lin Taiping couldn't help but shiver, but it's too late to say anything now. With the bonfire burning fiercely, over a dozen plates of Swift Dragon Meat were already steaming hot on the table.

  What can I say? Lin Taiping could only helplessly sigh, and picked up a piece of meat to put in his mouth: "Mmm, the taste is still quite good, it's just missing some chili peppers. Do you guys want... never mind, let's pretend I didn't say anything."

  No one had the mood to wait for him to continue, dozens of ox-headed men and women shouted in unison, their eyes already red with madness, pounced forward, grabbed those delicacies and stuffed them into their mouths, gobbling down like wolves and tigers, completely disregarding whether their tongues would be scorched red. In fact, looking at their ecstatic appearance, it seemed that they might even swallow their tongues along with the food.

  In just a few short minutes, the entire table of delicacies was swept clean, like wind dispersing clouds. Turu hugged a large piece of sizzling fried meat, knocking over several cow-headed men who rushed up to grab it, and with tears in his eyes, he sobbed: "Damn it! The Dark God is above, now even if you offer me a castle in exchange, I won't give up this piece of fried meat, absolutely not!"

  "Hey, hey, hey, can't you guys be a bit more ambitious? Lin Taiping finally couldn't take it anymore and seriously patted Tu Lu's shoulder. "Old Tu, as a great Cow Head Warrior, don't you think you should have a greater ideal in life?"

  "I don't!" Turu replied honestly, hugging the pan-fried meat tightly and refusing to let go. What ideal or not, as long as I can eat this delicious meal every day, I'm satisfied.

  "Seriously, is this what you call a feast?" Lin Taiping looked at him speechlessly. "Don't tell me that you guys don't want to have a mansion, eat exquisite delicacies every day, wear high-quality silk and jewelry made of precious stones and gold coins... Who knows, maybe there will even be beautiful female magicians... Hmm, speaking of beautiful female magicians, how many do you guys want?"

  "This should be enough, about five or six!" Tens of cattle-headed people subconsciously replied, looking up at the sky in unison, fantasizing about that beautiful life scene.

  Just the next moment, in the eerie silence, Tulou suddenly wiped the saliva from the corner of his mouth and shook his head repeatedly with a helpless expression: "Impossible, this is impossible. Let alone us Minotaur people, even the Witch King himself has never enjoyed such a life."

  "How is it impossible?" Lin Taiping adjusted his collar seriously, he had been leading up to this moment from the beginning. "Let's put it this way, do you know what my dream is?"

  What is it? Tuluo and dozens of cow-headed people curiously pricked up their ears, feeling the gossip fire burning fiercely.

  Under their collective gaze, Lin Taiping dragged out a long tail tone and then very seriously cleared his throat a few times: "This, actually my ideal is very simple, that is - to enjoy life! To thoroughly enjoy life!"

  I fell! Dozens of Minotaurs were instantly knocked to the ground, with their four legs in the air. Toru was even biting a cow's hoof, his eyes wide open in embarrassment. "Lin, are you kidding me?"

  "What's the problem?" Lin Taiping's face didn't redden, nor did his heart skip a beat. He spread open his hands as if nothing was wrong, "Even if it's something like conquering the world or becoming the strongest, in the end, isn't it all just for the sake of living more comfortably?"

  Fine, I have to admit that this is indeed his ideal at the moment. As a sarcastic and lazy guy who loves to eat and sleep, his so-called great ideal is to sleep until he wakes up naturally, count money until his hands cramp, and live a life that's comfortable enough to make people envy and resent him.

  Be a lord of a vast territory so large that one can get lost, living in the magnificent white bone castle built by the Witch King himself, sleeping until natural wakefulness in the warm bedroom renovated with black magic, served by a group of beautiful fox spirit girls; enjoying exquisite cuisine prepared by half-human chefs and fruit juice drinks airlifted from far-off Eastern lands.

  Then, if you feel bored, take the ghost fleet out to sea, with a large group of heavily armed dark knights behind you, a ferocious fire dragon lounging at your feet, a fallen angel smoking cigars and exhaling mist beside you, and several beautiful mermaids singing "Turandot" in front of you.

  Of course, you can also visit several ports along the way and do some small business of tens of billions of gold coins. If you see someone who is not pleasing to the eye, just snap your fingers and let hundreds of thousands of skull soldiers go up and gang up on them. After the gang fight, collect protection fees, and after collecting protection fees, find a beautiful older sister to talk about life ideals...

  What? You say this is common? It's supposed to be, dare you say you've never thought of it?

  It's so great and powerful, what a magnificent and lofty ideal of justice and passion! For a moment, dozens of cow-headed men listened with reverence and tears streaming down their faces. Only Tulun nodded frantically with a look of worship on his face: "Yes, yes, I've always thought so too... But Lin, how can we actually achieve this ideal?"

  No, the ideal is very rich and the reality is very bony. To be able to live a luxurious life that makes people collectively give the middle finger, of course, it's the ideal of all living beings, including dark creatures. But considering the poor conditions of the Minotaur tribe now, and taking into account the barrenness and backwardness of Devil Island, this seems really difficult.

  "Don't worry, there will be delicious food, gold coins, and beautiful women." Lin Taiping shrugged nonchalantly and then smiled slyly as he stretched out his left hand. "All of this is on me, but the question now is - Turo, are you guys interested in participating?"

  "This... " Turo stroked that clever head, and for a few seconds, it suddenly felt as if he had seen the devil's tail swishing behind Lin.

  But right after that, thinking of the wonderful life where he could count money until his hands cramped up, this guy suddenly jumped up like he had been injected with chicken blood, and directly put the cow's hoof on top, "Need you ask? Lin, just say what to do!"

  "Yes! Yes!" Dozens of cow-headed men nodded in unison, dozens of hooves raised into the air, their faces frenzied as they shouted: "The Dark God is above! We will get rich! The Dark God is above! We will enjoy! The Dark God is above! We will have beauties!

  "Alright, it's settled then!" Lin Taiping nodded in satisfaction. He suddenly felt that if he were to change careers and become a swindler, he would definitely be able to cheat a large group of devout followers.

  But soon, the facts proved to him that piety can sometimes be terrifying. For example, in the next moment, Toru, who had thoroughly fallen into madness, suddenly waved his hand with great momentum: "Bring people! To celebrate Lin's arrival and to bless our great ideals, bring out the most beautiful girl of our tribe!"

  And so, amidst the admiring gazes of dozens of cow-headed people, the most beautiful cow-headed tribe girl, Lilia, made her appearance. Her body was as sturdy as a city wall, with a waist that required two people to encircle it, and eyes as large as bronze bells. Added to this were her coy and shy expressions, as well as strange sounds of gulping saliva...

  At this moment, Lin Taiping couldn't help but burst into tears: "Forget it, I'm really not interested in women, you guys... hey, hey, don't come over, if you're coming over just come over, why are you pulling my clothes... save me! Save me! Save me!"

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