I hear the sound of wings flapping in the sky. It is loud and booming. Yet, I know those are not birds. I cannot see, but I do not need to.

  Will they come to take me away? To a place where I can rest, or have they come to end it all? Either way...I want to go home.

  My eyes slowly open up, how long did I sleep this time? An hour? Less? My body feels heavy still, with the ever-present aching of my constant training. Sitting up from my bedroll I hug myself, squeezing the sore muscles, feeling the pain ever clearer. It won't be long now before it vanishes.

  I place them on my back, the leather pelts, and walk out of my tent. The cold tingles against my exposed torso. My men are already out of their tents and getting ready to carry out their duties. Jorr gathers them around to take most of them west, where the humans have made their camps. Anywhere I look the hobgoblins avert their gaze.

  Lina walks up to me with a freshly made bowl of stew. She has grown used to the hours I wake up, whenever I do manage to fall asleep. I suppress a yawn and nod to her as thanks and return to this...Can I call it a resting place anymore?

  "Chief?" Lena enters behind me, it has been a while since she did.

  "What?" I can't hide the annoyance in my voice. It's becoming harder not to be bothered by everything and anything. She hesitates for a moment as I make my way to the table.

  "Are you alright?"

  Alright? That is...not what I expected. I carefully study her, she maintains a neutral expression, but the way she presses her lips together, how there is the slightest hint of a frown. She is upset.

  "This is what I mean, you are not really here anymore" She shifts uncomfortably for a moment, resting on her spear...how long was I silent? "...I-We, the few left who know from before we came here, wonder if you are doing alright"

  "I...am, doing fine " Even now the thought of being seen as weak makes my pulse run faster, and I find myself staring at the stew in my hands, my black claws dissapear inside of it "I'm fine " I repeat, setting the bowl on the table and looking up at her. She sighs.

  "Good...I was wondering if I could borrow a book"

  "You read? Since when?"

  "You haven't?... Enon has been teaching me a bit" Her frown deepens. Since when do they talk to each other so casually? And in what time? Has he come here without me realizing?

  After finishing translating the works Enon became well-liked among the carpenters of the camp, his ingenious mind served to make building more huts faster and reinforcing our defenses ever more tightly. Having taught me everything he could about alchemy without the proper tools and resources, he had no reason to return to my tent.

  So he must have been teaching here right at the entrance, where she stands guard most of the time...and I never once realized.

  "Chief?" Lina leans closer, trying to look at my face better. I did it again, my thoughts are like a limping mule dragging a wagon all by themselves.

  "Yes, yes. Grab whatever you want and leave" I can't deal with this right now, there is much that has to be done.

  "He... insists that I bring him something less, technical, do you have anything like that?" Do you want me to crawl around and look for it?! "N-No, I will grab anything"

  I said that out loud. She looks away and rushes to a nearby pile of books on the ground. She is...afraid. Before she would have spoken up, it always took some pushing but, she was ready to claw and bite if need be...Now I look at how her feline ears point at the ground, and her wide eyes panic not knowing which book to take.

  What am I doing?

  "Stop, stop," I say walking up to her. She tenses up and stands aside. I kneel in front of the pile and reach the very bottom, a book I didn't feel needed to be translated, It will be extra work for Enon...but I suppose he has the time " Here, it's about the story of Volatia, like a children's book, it will do well" For a moment I see that fire return, she must take it like an insult...but it vanishes as fast as it came.

  "Thank you," She says leaving as soon as she has it in her hands.

  Finishing the meal soon after I reach for a small leather bag where I pull a small handheld mirror, one of the objects I took from the raid. Just looking at it is enough to live through it all over again. And each passing day the black spots in my memory get filled with visages of the carnage that I carried out.

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  I stare at my reflection, using my claws to clean my jagged teeth from any bit of meat caught between them. All while the ghost of the child stares at me in silence. Gone are the whispers, but for a few days now that phantom haunts me. The child I impaled watches everything I do at every single moment. He is simply standing there in complete silence, shrouded by the darkness, only its ghostly white, empty eyes piercing through completely.

  How long have I dealt with the cursed creations of my head? He can stand there all he wants, so long as he is quiet.

  "Don't, I swear he-" I hear Lina speak up, who?...

  "Don't worry girl, I will be fine" Indri says entering the tent, and whatever meager calm I was getting quickly evaporates "Hey there Horny!" This stone in my boot "Brooding as usual I see"

  "What the fuck are you doing in my tent? leave" I growl, every muscle in my body tensing up when her stupid nickname is spoken. She is wise enough not to calm that in front of anyone, but each time she does I get closer to ripping her throat.

  "Please. What are you doing here anyway? Ghjor and Rollum are the ones training everyone, my brother is guiding constructions, and with Jorr west looking out for the humans and Dandrie with Nojus east keeping the orcs at bay, everything is under control" She leisurely strides around my tent "Doesn't get boring being here all by your lonesome?"

  Ghjor and Rollum? Must be the name of the hobgoblins that have taken the most initiative in training everyone. They are veterans of many raids when they lived in the valley, like Jorr. This woman has a habit of befriending everyone she meets. I don't like that.

  "The humans are yet to launch a real offensive, and the orcs are only kept in place thanks to the raging waters they can't cross. The situation can and will change at any moment. Why do I bother explaining this? I told you to leave"

  "Make me"

  What?! The gall on this woman. She rests on the table, her snarky smile challenging me. Does she think she is untouchable because of the agreement with her brother?! I want to prove her wrong...But I can't! So long as I have a use for them. But I'm not the most patient, not nowadays, and if she goes on down this path...

  "Hoho!, Dangerous eyes" She leans back "I remember them, the same way you looked at me when you broke my face the first time we met!" I focus on the necklace hanging from her neck, the Starblood inside that vial.

  As usual, I was lied to once more. Enon told me when I met him that it was called Startears, but with Thorum's knowledge, I know better. He lied so easily and convincingly, that it makes me wonder what else is he lying about. I'm eager to get the proper equipment and force him to prepare every single concoction he taught me, to see if anything blows up on his face.

  "Eyes up here, Horny," She says grabbing the vial and hiding it inside her fur tunic, then sitting on top of my table. Seeing me about to yell at her she speaks up fast "Hey! Listen, I have a reason to be here now. I want to go with Jorr and tear some human's heads!"

  "...why? You have something against humans" My curiosity manages to force my anger to relent. She rolls her eyes.

  "They hate me, I hate them. It's not that difficult to grasp. Do you know anything about Volatia at all?" She shrugs and then smirks "Oh, I honestly forget you are a goblin sometimes" I'm running out of patience "They came here, killed a bunch of my people, started the war, destroyed The Empire, and forced what was left of us to be enslaved by the fucking elves...except for Dandrie, of course"

  "Wait, what did you say?" Elves...that is how I call them, or how I remember they were called when I was human, from where I'm from. That was not common, not Akani, it was English. Straight out of my memories.

  It's been so long since I last spoke English, and never once have I heard it in this world. Even my very thoughts are spoken in Akani. How is it possible that she knows that word?

  "I mean, the Ahajhalnar are a bunch of bastards, but Dandrie is the only one with a mind of her own. Don't tell her I ever told you this but she-"

  "No!" I slam my fist on the table and she jumps away "Elves...or elf. Where did you learn that word?" She has her vial in hand. All that bravado and at the first sight of aggression she is ready to gulp it down. I guess I can't blame her.

  "...I learned it from human envoys. Ahajhalnari were called like that by the human hero who led them when they first came here"

  Galatross, I remember him. Could it be? No, it must be. I am not the first person to be reborn in this world. Could there be someone else out there, right now, who is going through the same thing I am? How often does this happen?

  "But I suggest you never call Dandrie that, they hate it...regarding my new position as a front fighter?" She lets her words trail as she relaxes and lets go of her vial, yet, she remains close to the entrance.

  I would rather not arouse any suspicion by pondering this with anyone looking. I shake my head lightly and return my attention to her.

  "You can, but not on the human front. If the witches want you, don't you think they could have eyes on the human side, and catching a glimpse of you is all they would need"

  "You are working with a witch, literally twenty meters from where I sleep. I don't know what would be the problem or what is really going on" She crosses her arms.

  "And it will remain that way. You can fight but on the east. That's it" I remain silent staring her down. This was not the answer she wanted and it is obviously painted on her face. But her frown lessens and her smile returns soon.

  "Great! I'm okay with smashing some orc heads too! IwillletDandrieknownow bye!" She runs out of the tent.

  Fantastic, I will have to deal with that...elf.

  I have neglected to look back to where I came from. Who I was before I came here. Those dreams I occasionally have, that feel so familiar, yet, so ethereal that once I wake up, there is no memory of them. Just a sensation, usually, calm. How can I get a hold of them? Now I am more curious than ever to figure out who I was.

  But first, I must deal with the situation we have now. Surrounded by enemies, but neither of us making any progress. They have a virtually endless supply of men and resources compared to us. So the waiting game will only ensure our defeat, what we need is a powerful and decisive offense.

  And after planning for days, I have a good idea...and we can test some of Enon's alchemy too. For now, I will wait for Dandrie to come to me and deal with her in the privacy of my tent. For how much she cares about the well-being of the siblings, I'm not surprised at all how not even a minute later after Indri leaves, I can smell the woody scent she has quickly approaching me.