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[Vol. 3 Epilogue] The True Talk Show: Episode Three

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  “Welcome back to another episode of The True Talk Show!” Oleander announces. “I’m your host, Olly, and I’m joined by none other than the true best girl, Rock!”

  Rock lifts one of her paws and barks. The studio audience goes wild as they cheer and shout for Rock, all of them wearing shirts with Rock’s face on them.

  “We’ve got some new faces to talk to this time around! While not as many new people were introduced this time around, the ones who were introduced are important! We also saw the exit from a controversial character. Will her exit be temporary, or is it permanent? Who knows! For now, let’s get the show rolling with some interviews!”

  The crowd claps as the spotlights shine on the entrance to the stage, but the clapping abruptly ends as soon as Rao walks out onto the stage. Instead, they boo.

  “Oof. Tough crowd. Then again, you did start off super asshole-y,” Oleander tells Rao as he sits down on the couch.

  “I apologized for that! And now I know better. I swear I won’t do it again. Probably,” Rao says to the sound of the crowd’s continued booing.

  “Don’t worry, this crowd mainly cares about the girls, so it’s hard to get any love as a guy here.”

  “What about you? People seem to like you from everything I’ve seen.”

  “Yeah, but I’m basically a girl and I know how to be a top-tier bro, so you get the best of both worlds with me! You get the cutesy appearance and flirting of a girl, and you get the bromance that only a bro can offer!”

  “Wouldn’t guys stop caring after figuring out you’re actually a guy though?”

  “Some do, but for a whole bunch of them, that actually makes me even better! Wait, I’m supposed to be interviewing you! I mean sure, I love talking about myself, but you’re the new guy! So, Rao Rao, what do you think of the ladies so far?”

  “Guys like you even more when they find out you’ve got a dick? Weird, but whatever.” The crowd boos Rao even more. “Anyways, uhh… I haven’t really talked to Serra much yet, but she seems pretty funny. That Cassiel chick is just way too mean. I have no idea how Fenbro could handle a girl like her. It’s like you take one wrong step around her and—”

  “Careful, Rao. Cass Cass somehow has a secret provider of sharks to feed people to. You don’t want to end up getting dunked into her shark tank.”

  “See, that’s exactly what I mean! Only a crazy—” Rao pauses to look around. “B-bro, I just felt chills down my spine. I feel like I’m being watched.”

  “That’s just the sharks. Anyways, go on!”

  “Ri-right… Nell seems crazy as well but at least she’s nice from what I’ve seen. Just really mean and cold to me. It’s like she refuses to even think of me as a human – like I’m just some ant to her. That girl with the cat ears was definitely the worst out of all of them. I mean, you could just look in her eyes and tell she was insane. Something wasn’t right in her head.”

  “Poor Aiko. As much as I hated her accent when she was Nyaiko, she needs some serious support and help. Let’s hope that she gets better and comes back sometime! For now,” Oleander presses down on the red button which opens up the floor in front of the couch, springs said couch up, and tosses Rao down the hole.

  “Broooo!” Rao shouts, his voice growing quieter as he falls deeper beneath the stage.

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  “How deep does the hole go? Nobody knows! Onto the next guest!”

  This time, it is Azalabulia who walks onto the stage and is met with a mixed reception. Some of the audience is cringing just at the sight of her, some are checking out her perfect figure, and a few of them are even striking cool poses to copy her while cheering for her!

  Azalabulia takes notice of her fans and strikes a cool pose with one hand stuck out in front of her and the other covering her left eye before saying, “Heh, it only makes sense for somebody such as myself to—”

  “Anyways!” Oleander cuts her off. “I can only handle so much cringe, so let’s keep your roleplaying to Fenny and the rest of them. How’re you enjoying being a member of the crew so far?”

  Azalabulia blinks a few times with reddened cheeks as she’s still striking her pose but has been completely thrown off guard. Taking a seat on the couch which has been returned to its original position, nothing to hint at the floor in front of her hiding a neverending pit, she answers Oleander’s question, “It’s – it’s nice to play with other people for once.”

  “I bet that cringy roleplay personality scared everybody else off, right?”

  Azalabulia hangs her head as Oleander’s words pierce her heart.

  “It’s alright. It’s not like a flying fox thing and a dog made out of rock are more popular than you are.”

  Her head hangs lower.

  “Don’t worry. At least Fenny and Cass Cass like you.”

  Azalabulia lifts her head and looks at Oleander with excited eyes. “They do? I – I mean, of course they do! How could they not? I—”

  “Next question! What’s up with the roleplaying anyways? Is there some secret reason why you like it so much, or do you do it just because?”

  “Well… I—”

  This episode of The True Talk Show is brought to you by Jimmy’s Auto Movers! Are you moving and need to transport lots of furniture? Is your car too small to fit all of your belongings in it? Do you need a crew to help you with packing and unpacking everything before and after your move? Then call Jimmy’s Auto Movers! We offer rentable autovans at affordable prices that can’t be beat! You can either rent the van and do all the moving with it yourself, or you can hire a crew of experienced movers to come with it that will help you every step of the way!

  “I guess that makes sense! Wait, we were on a commercial break? Nobody told me!” Oleander shouts with a pout.

  “Should I… should I say it again?” Azalabulia asks.

  “Nah, it’s time for the next guest. Next!” Oleander shouts, hitting the button and sending Azalabulia into the abyss below. “Now, I don’t know how the audience feels about this good boy yet,” Rock’s tail starts excitedly wagging, “but I know that he’s got one major fangirl already! Come on out, Shogun!”

  Shogun walks out onto the stage and looks around, sniffing the air.

  Rock barks and immediately grabs his attention.

  With his eyes set on his love, Shogun runs up to Rock and the two start nuzzling their heads against each other.

  The crowd is torn between wanting to aww and feeling like they’ve had their favorite girl stolen away from them.

  “How does it feel, Shogun, to know that you’ve cucked thousands of people?” Oleander asks Shogun, holding his microphone up to Shogun’s snout.

  Shogun licks it and then licks Rock.

  “I see! It must be nice knowing that everybody is jealous of you. The best girl just wants to give you all of her attention! She isn’t even caring about the show anymore!”

  Rock pauses to sniff Shogun.

  The crowd knows that something is wrong when she starts growling at him.

  “Oh? What’s this? Another lover’s spat?” Oleander asks, stepping back to see what the two canines do.

  Shogun barks before whining.

  Rock sniffs him again and snarls.

  Oleander walks up to Shogun and leans over just enough to get a whiff of what the smell is that’s irritating Rock.

  Perfume.

  “What’s this? Shogun smells like another woman! Is this show about to turn heated?” Oleander asks while Rock snarls even louder than before.

  Shogun rolls over onto his back and kicks his legs up to attempt submitting to her, but she doesn’t buy it.

  Oleander listens in on his earpiece and announces, “Wait! We’ve got footage of what led to this!”

  On the large screen above the stage, security camera footage pops up of Shogun walking around backstage sniffing a bunch of random things, walking into the room where others are getting dressed and having their makeup done, and he then leans up onto one of the dressers which results in him accidentally knocking a bottle of perfume onto the floor. The bottle lands in the perfect position to squirt some of its spray onto him.

  Rock looks up at the screen then back down to Shogun.

  He’s still whining.

  Rock covers his face in licks to make it up to him.

  This time, the audience can’t resist awwing.

  “I have a feeling that Rock is being influenced by all the members of Fenny’s harem. Serra: no problem licking and showing PDA. Cass Cass: gets mad over little things and jumps to conclusions. Nell Nell: Rock was probably thinking up some crazy idea in her head to explain why her boytoy here smelled like perfume. Shogun, you’ve got one heck of a doggo here for you to learn how to handle!”

  Shogun ignores Oleander’s words, instead just being happy that he’s made up with Rock.

  “Alright everybody! That does it for this episode of The True Talk Show! Don’t forget to tune in next time for even more dog and fox relationship drama!” Oleander says while waving to the camera.

  Rock and Shogun ignore the cameras to instead just lick and cuddle with each other.

  Barret16 for recently updating his review and ! Apologies if you're not mentioned here, but I'm just thanking them since they're the most recent ones! I'll probably try to always thank people for positive reviews when they pop up from now on. Anyways, they totes deserve some thumbs-ups on their reviews. Also, if you're reading this, Kalari, I'll be giving the synopsis a facelift soon.

  WHY SERRA DEAF AND NO USE TECHNOLOGY???

  very accepting and progressive. Nobody is going to really give a shit if somebody chooses to not fix something that they were born with.

  AUTHOR ACCIDENTALLY MADE THE SETTING DARK

  really fucked. It's pretty much impossible to safely leave Earth because of all the debris stuck in orbit, coastal cities have been mostly abandoned, most life in the ocean is gone, many bugs and animals have gone extinct, etc. However, people keep living on. Just because the characters are in a "dark" setting does not mean that the story itself is going to be dark. As for why sex is "rewarded" in the game, since some pople think that's dark, it's because there aren't any hangups about sex in this setting like there are in our own reality. It's also the game's way of making a "realistic" respawn system. Respawn = rebirth = life = sex.

  Unbelievable AIs

  "One of the biggest problems is the 'human/living' NPC AIs. With AI, there are 101 ways to produce believable NPCs for the game that don't require that NPC to be a true human simulation. So the author has either made the developing team for the game software retarded or sadistic amoral bastards, or the protagonist is utterly mistaken. It looks like it's the former, which means there's a serious issue with consistency in the setting."

  humans. Now, in a game like this, the more realistic it is the better. That makes it more immersive. Immersive retains players better. That's why they're "true human simulations."

  Spineless MC, not enough sex(???)

  Too much/repetitive teasing

  I just think it's cute. If I could write my girl characters making cute anime girl noises all the time, I would. That's not all, though. Some people just think there is too much teasing in general. In which case... well, I don't have a response to that. I like teasing. I think it's cute and funny. There is going to be just as much teasing moving on as there ever has been, and as is the case in realistic relationships, the teasing tends to stick to the same things. I've been in relationships that lasted years where we were using the same inside jokes, references, and ways to tease each other for years after they first were used. I've had friendships for over a decade where it was the same way. So, people might not like this, but it's realistic and I like it which is all that really matters.

  TOO GAY

  at most, yet a stupid amount of people have complained about it being too gay. Mainly in private since they know it will make them look bad to say it in public.

  Too much romance; bad romance

  officially move in together, and they're focusing more on each other and paying attention to each others' needs. So, yeah, I guess that's stagnant. Now, if people think the romance is just poorly done and unrealistic, there's not much I can say about that since it's all subjective.

  Cass Cass is a horrible tsundere and has zero growth

  less growth for her and everybody else!

  Aiko

  I liked her and some of you did, but she was meant to cause drama and issues while serving as an ingredient of growth for Cass, Ryouta, and herself.

  Azalabulia 2 cringy

  Forced contrast is the only reason the MC looks good

  am a weeaboo. Is that poor storytelling? Maybe. Just gotta admit, I don't care about being realistic in that regard.

  Stagnant MC, no character character growth

  "The MC is extremely stagnant. In a game setting stat and quest advancement is crucial. If that does not happen then the story has failed in its genre. The MC has no significant progress in this regard. It is made worse by the fact that the MC used to lead a famous guild. He more than any one else should know the necessity of progress."

  used to do that which is why he no longer gives a fuck. He just wants to relax and have fun. The game is more like a social sandbox than it is strictly a game. Players don't have to treat it like a traditional RPG. There are probably millions of players who play it just to socialize.

  personal "character" growth, but this story is more about the group and romance than that. In which case, there has been tons of growth. The group as a whole is progressing pretty damn fast.

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