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Anansi/es Joke - Another snippet from a short story

  Their prey was in their sights. A male 'Giant Forest Hog'. A common animal in the Dura rainforests of the Neo-Wagadu Empire. Its dark brown hair covered the whole of its body, which camouflaged it in the deep rainforest and its massive, robust, muscular body gave it the power to easily chase away most predators. However, to a warrior that has learned the ways of the forest, their eyes could see the muscle spasms of an ant farting and their skills with the spear and bow made the hog's musculature nothing more than a tasty prize. An animal that size could feed their whole village. The hunters would return home as heroes if they manage to bag the beast... If.

  The hunters were well hidden and placed to begin to make their move. With subtle eye and head movements and small hand gestures, they communicated without so much as a peep. Three of the hunters took up their bows and each slowly loaded an arrow, being careful not to startle anything in the forest. The other two hunters clutched their spears. With a final hand gesture, the hunt began.

  The archers let loose their arrows. The twang of the bow echoed through that part of the forest, making the birds take flight. Before the hog could be startled by the sound and scamper off even deeper within the rainforest, the arrows had already hit their mark. The hog's squeal rang through the forest. One arrow shaft jutted from its back leg, the two arrows found their place in the side of its belly. The beast tried to scamper away but with the arrow, in its back leg, it wasn't really going anywhere. Next came the other two warriors with their spears. One of them took aim, lining his arm and spear, then flung his spear. The spear darted through the air then hit the side of the porcine and it fell onto his side. The hunters made their way to their dying prey then stood over it.

  “Okay, boy, now it's time to become a man. Put the hog out of its misery,” said one of the hunters. He was the oldest of the group, at fifty-two years old, average height, thin shoulder length dreadlocks, very dark complexion, a stocky, muscular build that was gained from a life of hard work. He wore nothing but a pair of dark green trousers and sturdy sandals.

  The youngest hunter nodded, then walked over to the dying hog, spear in one hand. The boy was no older than fifteen years old, a lanky, dark-skinned beanpole of a boy, only just starting to develop a man's body.

  The young hunter stood over the weakly breathing prey, holding the spear point inches away from the hog's throat. He stared into the eye of the hog. Desperation.

  "Come on, kill him already," shouted one of the hunters. "The village would like to eat sometime this century."

  "Enough," hushed another hunter next to him while slapping him on his chest. "This is going to the boy's first kill. He's a bag of nerves. We were all in his position once."

  The boy closed his eyes, took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," he whispered, then he plunged his spear through the boar's throat. The hog gave one final death squeal, then lay still... The deed was done.

  The remaining hunters strutted to their prey and the boy.

  "Well done, young'un," praised the eldest warrior. "The first time is always the hardest."

  "Thanks. I didn't think I would go through with it," the boy replied.

  "You're a man now!" said another hunter.

  The boy's eyes lit up and pride beamed from his face.

  “We can celebrate when we get back to the village. Right now we need to prepare this big fucker for transporting.”

  “By Nyame,” said one of the hunters, using the Akan chief deity's name in vain. “This thing is fucking heavy.”

  The hunters walked through the forest with the dead hog tied and attached to two makeshift, wooden poles, being carried on the shoulders of the four youngest warriors.

  “Quit complaining. I'm trying to enjoy the walk and the sounds of the forest,” said the old hunter, strolling rather casually.

  “That's easy for you to say, old man. You don't have to carry this thing on your shoulders,” replied another hunter.

  The old man shook his head. “Listen, we'll be home soon. Just focus on taking one ste-,” He held up his hand abruptly, signalling to stop. The old man's eyes and ears scanned the forest.

  The other hunters looked around as well.

  “What's wrong, old man?” asked one of the hunters.

  “Listen. Do you hear it?” asked the old man.

  “Hear what?”

  “I don't hear a damn thing.”

  The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

  “Exactly,” replied the old hunter. “The forest has gone quiet... something is here. Following us. Hunting us.”

  The group looked at each other with confusion and scepticism. A forest going quiet was hardly a sign of an ominous threat. What predator in their right mind would hunt five men? Five warriors armed with spears, swords and bows?

  Still, the old man was adamant about something following them and that something had predatory intentions.

  “They?” asked one of the hunters. “There's more than one?”

  The old hunter nodded.

  “What's stalking us?” asked the youngest one, who was clearly the most agitated. “A group of leopards?”

  “Leopards are solitary. What's stalking us is something... different. And definitely not natural to Irun'uwa.”

  “What the fuck are you on about?” Said a random hunter. “Old man, you've truly lost it.”

  A loud, inhuman shriek echoed through the forest. The hunters' blood froze as they frantically checked their surroundings, except for the old warrior who was surprisingly calm and had a look of 'I told you so' on his face.

  The old man ordered the hunters to drop and leave the hog carcass. “Keep a tight formation and be on the look out. Let's move.”

  The hunters moved through the forest at double their previous speed, their eyes constantly scanning and shifting their surroundings, spears grasped tightly and bows taught and loaded.

  They ignored the second inhuman shriek which was louder than the previous. Every hunter wanted to run as fast as they could. To get home to see their children. Wives. Girlfriends. Parents. Yet they knew that they had to maintain their warrior discipline. Running frantically would only tire the warriors and make them easy prey for whatever was hunting them. Unfortunately, what was hunting the men had caught up with them and there was no escape.

  There they were, hanging from the treetops and branches, shrieking with what can only be described as glee. The demons that the old man warned them of.

  One of the monsters dropped from the branches and landed only a few metres in front of one of the hunters.

  The creature stood just under three metres tall, dwarfing the hunters when standing upright on its fully iron, chiropteran hooked feet. Greyish brown fur and lean developed musculature covered its body plan of long limbs and very broad shoulders, yet paradoxically, its musculature was far more developed than a human. Its face was the stuff of nightmares, a cross between a vampire bat and a great ape.

  Fixed upon its head, under its large, heavy gorilla-like brow ridges were large bat-like eyes that were almost black in colour yet somehow bloodshot as traces of red meandered within them. Its nose was much like the vampire bat and its jaw was extremely large and powerful with a wide mouth.

  The monster loudly shrieked with glee, revealing its rows of jagged iron teeth. The hunters stood like obsidian statues with their weapons readied and sweat dripping from their skin. Only the youngest hunter showed signs of fear on his young face. The rest had furrowed brows and grim faces.

  The standing monster shrieked once more then went on the attack. Despite its cumbersome movement on the ground, it ran with deceptive speed and agility. The warrior had only milliseconds to react to the monster's claws as it swiped at him. It cost the hunter his spear as the monster's claws tore through the shaft like paper. Two arrows pierced the monster's torso as it attempted another swipe at the now weaponless hunter.

  “Go on boy, spear the bastard,” shouted the old warrior.

  The young warrior's heart pounded violently, all his instincts told him to run. Yet with a tight grip on his spear, he channelled his fear into its proper outcome, courage. He charged and thrust his spear into the monster's torso. The monster howled and shrieked in pain as its dark, murky blue blood poured profusely out of its gaping wound.

  An elated look shone on the boy's face. First a 'Giant Forest Hog', now a demon kill. Just think how much his standing in the village will go up.

  Yet, his elation was short lived and turned to horror as the heavily wounded demon made a desperate claw swipe at the young one.

  The boy closed his eyes and flinched, as he braced himself for the inevitable. However, instead of sharp claws, the boy felt a hard shove on his shoulder that sent him rolling on the ground. In the boy's place was one of the hunters holding his broken spear and all he could do was watch in terror as the demon's claws tore through his companion's belly. The hunter was hit with such force that it sent him crashing into the nearest tree, back first with a sickening, crunchy thud.

  The warriors looked on in horror as their companion lay broken at the tree. Eviscerated, his guts spewing out of his what was his abdomen. The rest of the demons hanging in the trees whipped themselves up into a frenzy at the sight and smell of the near dead hunter. They descended from the branches to their prey and tore into it. The other hunters could only look on in anguish as their comrade was nothing more than a meat canvas for the monsters' claws and jagged iron teeth.

  Fear and anguish turned to rage and resolve, for the warriors knew that the demons wouldn't stop just with them feasting on their dead comrade. Others would be next. Them. Their loved ones. The village.

  “Boy...,” said the old warrior in a concerned tone, only partially looking at him. “Run. Run as fast as you can back to the village. We'll hold them off as long as possible.”

  “No, let me stay and fight with you,” said the boy, defiantly. “I'm a man now and I'm no coward.”

  “I know you're a man now and I know that you aren't a coward. But part of being a man is seeing the bigger picture. You need to get back to the village and warn them about the monsters. There's no point for one as young as you to die today. Go. Don't let our sacrifice be in vain. Also, try to get in contact with Mikumbi. The village will need all the help we can get.”

  Tears welled up in the young hunter's eyes, he wanted to protest but knew deep down the old man was right. He bid the other hunters farewell, asked the ancestors to watch and protect them then ran back to the village as fast as he could.

  The remaining hunters fought valiantly knowing that they'd be with their ancestors soon. Their arrows and spears pierced the demons. They even managed to kill a few of them. Alas, the inevitable came as there were too many demons. Too many claws. Too superhuman.

  As the remaining hunters were getting slaughtered, a mysterious figure laughed in the background.

  “Such delightful fun... Well, not for the humans.”

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