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Grasping at Gravity

  He dreamt of soaring through the sky with beautiful wings, or bending fire to his will. Shapeshifting might’ve been neat. Invisibility would be a saving grace. Anything would do, so long as it functioned normally. His classmates all had great gifts. Amalia could turn her whole body into water. Elias could hear better than anyone he knew. Wilhelmina could lift a full-grown man over her head with ease. Graham, however, had an abnormal ability. He could control gravity, which on the surface was pretty cool. Rare even. However, while other people quickly learned to control their abilities, Graham was unable to.

  At first, his parents simply held him close and reassured him that his ability would stabilize soon. His father and he would create forts in the living room and laugh at whatever cheesy comedy they could find. His mother would cuddle him late into the night, humming lullabies as he drifted off to sleep. Anything to distract the young boy. However, as Graham got older, he could no longer be easily distracted. Instead, he’d spend his days fantasizing about all the cool ways he’d use his ability when it finally started working. He’d ramble on and on to his parents and present them with scribbled drawings of him using it successfully. They would always exchange a look before messing up his hair and accepting the gift. With this came his need to try to use his ability any chance he could get. He’d try to use it when putting on plays with his stuffed animals, or to cheer up his parents when they were sad. Nothing worked. As time went on his parents’ worried faces became more and more apparent. Soon, they sat him down and told him they were going to see a doctor.

  Thus, Graham spent most of his early childhood going to specialist after specialist. His parents drove to appointments early in the morning or flew across the country for answers. Nothing ever came of it, though. They would pace throughout the house with raccoon eyes as they worried about their child. They were certain that there was an answer. A piece of information that they hadn’t grasped yet. A map that would guide them if only they sacrificed a little more sleep or searched a little harder.

  Eventually, though, a senior doctor sat them down and told them that there wasn’t anything more to be done. Graham was finally free of all the tests. No more needles or MRIs. No more spending hours in a waiting room or stress about pending results. However, there was one downside. Graham was now labeled as disabled.

  The label quickly became something that defined him. Something his peers could use as an excuse to bully him. Every time his powers activated, they turned on him. Their angry voices would overlap like a symphony of hissing snakes. They would crowd around him as if he was a delicious mouse. Enjoying the way he shivered in fear.

  Thus, he spent a lot of his time away from his classmates. His lunch periods were often spent eating with a teacher or two. The stories they would tell were actually fairly interesting. Plus, every now and again, he would get a heads-up about the topics they would be studying. He learned to accept isolation from people his own age. Trends and gossip meant little to him. In many ways, it was like he skipped being a child altogether. Self-preservation did not allow for the frivolous ways of youth. Instead, he was a strategist. He had learned how to avoid his peers. How to find empty classrooms. He melded with the shadows with ease. The only factor he could not control was when his powers would strike.

  ~~~

  Life went on like this until one day soon after Christmas break. It wasn’t perfect, but it was bearable. Well, mostly. The day that changed everything had been a busy school day full of tests. Those were never fun. Thirty children sat in rows, scribbling away at a history test. Pencils scratching at the paper. Feet tapping nervously on the ground. Other than these ambient sounds, the room was dead silent. The teacher used her ability to copy her own form. Her clones walked up and down the aisles watching for cheaters as she graded papers at the front of the classroom. Talking would have been a death sentence. Still, Graham knew enough about the look of fear in someone else’s eyes to know that the majority of the class was not prepared.

  So, yes, while that day wasn’t exactly pleasant, it had been normal and that had been all that Graham cared about. He had been content to lose himself in the test like everyone else, up until his pencil started floating in the air.

  Graham’s nose had been buried in the handout as he reread a question for the third time when he’d seen a flash of yellow in his peripheral vision. His head jerked up as if he could sense the impending doom. Wide eyes watched the sharp implement float through the air. He sat frozen as he watched the items on his desk levitate one by one. Each new item sent a jolt of terror through his body. It felt like even the hair on his arms stood on end.

  Suddenly the whole room was in chaos as everyone floated out of their seats. Their belongings hovered around them as their heads swiveled back and forth. The test papers twisted and turned through the air. It felt like the world had turned over as desks floated across the room and people instinctually fought for footing on the ground that they could not reach.

  All of them were used to this sensation. Graham’s powers would strike at the most random of times. A free period. The halls. During lunch. The entire school knew what it was like to be entirely weightless. Well, at least physically. Graham knew that deep down their chests were filled with burning coals of anger. Fury that had burned him hundreds of times before. From cruel nicknames to tripping him in the halls. The burns they administered scarred like brands across his skin. Each had a story that was locked away in his brain, burning like an eternal flame.

  He knew that when his ability finally gave out, he would have hell to pay. His wounded heart beat like prey ready to run for its life. There were places where he could hide. They would find him, but at least it would give him a few minutes to prepare himself. A part of him wished he could develop an immunity to the venom they hurled. However, he had long learned that while he could prepare for anguish, expect it even, it would hurt all the same. It was like a cosmic joke. A way for the entire universe to look down at him and whisper about the tragedy of his existence.

  In the blink of an eye, Graham’s powers switched off and everyone fell to the floor. The desks crashed to the ground with a bang. A chorus of groans could be heard. As Graham slowly sat up, wincing at the pull on his bruised skin, he watched the pristine white pages of their test flutter to the ground like confetti at the end of a performance. The yellow pencil that started it all was a few feet away, snapped in half.

  He looked up, his brown eyes widening when he realized that his entire class was looking at him. Some with bruises of their own. Others with tangled and mussed hair. The main commonality was the wide-eyed expression that always followed these events. The calm before the storm.

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  Within seconds, he scrambled to his feet and dashed from the room. The posters hung up on the classroom door fluttered behind him. His legs felt like jelly; as if he was a newborn fawn first learning to walk. Even so, he put all he could into racing down the halls. His sneakers squeaked as he turned around each corner. His eyes wildly darted around while his ears buzzed with static. The only thought racing through his mind was the need to get away. He allowed his feet to carry him as he zeroed in on this goal. Run. Get away. Hide.

  Finally, he turned the corner to an empty music room and crashed through the door. He slammed the door closed with shaking hands. The sound rang through the empty room. With unsteady hands, he fumbled for the lock. His fingers were shaking so badly that they slipped off of the cool metal twice before the lock fell into place. The room was pitch black and Graham welcomed it. He dropped to the floor, burying his head in his knees as he started to sob. His body shook, and his breath was stilted, but he was alone and that was what mattered.

  Time passed and Graham’s mind wandered. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to be wrapped up in blankets beneath a fort with his dad at his side. He wanted to laugh freely again. To roll around on the carpet in delight or wake up without fear of his ability activating at the wrong moment. His hands balled into fists. He wanted to be strong, to not care what other people thought. For just a moment, he resolved to, using his anger to shield him, before another wave of despair crashed around him, taking his resolve with it.

  There was a knock on the door. The young boy ignored it, burying his head further into his knees. He was shrouded in shadows, backlit only by the yellow light coming from beneath the door. The knock came again. Graham’s sneakers squeaked against the ground as he tightened his hold on his knees. The fabric of his jeans scratched at his face as he buried his head between them.

  “Come on, Graham, there’s only one heartbeat in there. I know it’s you.” Elias’ muffled voice slipped beneath the door. Graham sniffled and wiped his sleeve under his nose but made no move to let his classmate in. “You know,” Elias continued, his speech slowed as it took on a contemplative edge, “what you did in there was actually pretty awesome.” The door wiggled a bit on its hinges as the boy on the opposite side also sat on the floor. Graham watched what little light that came from the bottom of the door pulse as Elias moved into a comfortable position. “I mean, I, for one, didn’t study enough for that test. My mom would have killed me if I bombed it.” Graham furrowed his brow as he listened to Elias speak. His sluggish brain did the best it could to figure out why the other boy was there with him. “So, thanks, I guess. Your ability acting up means that we can’t finish the test today.”

  Graham leaned his head up against the door, doing his best to blink the tears out of his eyes. “You do realize that I didn’t mean to do it, right?”

  “Who cares,” Elias said with a laugh. The door rattled as he shuffled again. “We get an extra day to study. Most of the class is absolutely thrilled right now.” There was no response. “Come on, Graham, it’ll be great.”

  Graham jerked his body into a standing position, twisted, and swung the door open. His whole body felt like he had been electrocuted; buzzing with ambient energy. Elias fell backward at the sudden loss of back support, his hands scrambling to catch himself before he hit the floor. He quickly turned to look up at Graham. “In what way is this great?” Graham practically growled as he glared down at the other boy. “So, what, my ability finally managed to work in their favor, so they’re all happy?” His hands curled into fists. “What about next time, huh? Will they be a-okay with it then?”

  “I-”

  “Shut up, Elias.” The words rang around the hall. Both boys' eyes widened at the volume. They for paused a moment, waiting to hear the heavy footfalls of an approaching teacher. Graham’s voice quieted as he continued. “They hate me.” He pointed an accusing finger at Elias. “You hate me.”

  “No, I-, I-.” Elias stumbled for the right words, his hands flinging around in nonsensical gestures. Graham sighed and reached for the doorknob. “Wait!” Elias quickly blocked the door as he scrambled to his feet. “You’re right. We treated you badly. They-,” he gulped, “I’m sorry.” He pulled on the edge of his T-shirt as his eyes flickered to and from his classmate.

  Graham rolled his eyes. His voice took on an incredulous tone. “Why should I care about your apology?” Graham took a step forward. “You have done nothing but belittle me for years.”

  Elias shuffled his feet. “You’re right, but I think I’m ready to change.”

  “Oh yeah? Why?” The words were sharp and hostile. Graham took another step forward, getting in Elias’ personal space.

  Elias’ eyes widened, but he straightened his shoulders and answered in a determined tone. “Because when we were floating through the air, I thought of how cool it was that we were going to miss the test.” Graham rolled his eyes and moved to close the door again. Elias pushed back, his other hand falling into a pleading gesture. “Then, once we fell back to the ground, I saw how sad you looked. I was confused. Your powers did something really cool. I couldn’t understand why you were upset.” He took a deep breath. His eyes skittered toward the floor before they raised to stare into Graham’s gaze. “Then I noticed the way you looked at all of us. As if you wanted nothing more than to be away from us.” His fingers curled against the wood of the door. “As you raced away, I realized how awful we had been to you. How afraid we had made you.” He took a deep breath. His whole body seemed to shake with the effort. “I’m sorry, Graham.”

  Graham blinked tears out of his eyes and said in a shaky and uncertain voice. “I can’t forgive you. Not yet.”

  “That’s alright.” Elias smiled weakly. “It’ll take time. I know we can get the others to come around too.”

  “I don’t know. . .”

  “They’re already excited to not take the test. They can’t bully you for that. We could get them to see reason.”

  “And what if they don’t care?”

  Elias’ smile grew as he tentatively placed a hand on Graham’s shoulder. “Well, then this time you aren’t alone.”

  Graham squinted at the other boy. His hands curled into fists and his shoulders straightened. “Alright, let’s try.”

  He stepped out of the music room, turning to face the door as he closed it. His fingers wrapped around the cool metal and he took a deep breath. His heart was beating in his chest, but there was also something else. It was weak and fluttery, but it was there - hope. It had been so long since he’d had hope. He’d almost forgotten what it had felt like. With a small exhale, he stepped away from the door and made his way back to class.

  ~~~

  Progress was not easy. Not everyone was keen to let go of Graham as a metaphorical punching bag. However, as more and more people came to the young boy’s defense, those people slowly faded away. There were also days when Graham retreated back into himself, used to years of isolation. Elias made mistakes, old habits rearing up. However, they were few and far between and became less with time. The entire class slowly learned to value Graham as an individual in his own right. One who was cared for, not in spite of his abilities or because of them, but simply because of who he was. As they got to know him, they saw more and more glimpses of the funny, creative, and empathetic boy who had been locked away for so long.

  ~~~

  This story was written with the help of a prompt from r/WritingPrompts on Reddit. That prompt was "Invisibility and along with other magic conditions can be permanent and registered as disabilities with the local government. You live with one of these disabilities."

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