The New York Moon hung high on the horizon, as the convertible 1991 Toyota Celica hummed down the highway. The cold air whipped through Rogue’s hair, the scent of asphalt and pine drifting in from the endless stretches of road ahead.

  Alamo shifted uncomfortably in his seat, adjusting the tight jeans Rogue had snagged from Cyclops’ stash. He had the black shirt with the red X-Men logo stretched snug across his torso, but it was the damn jeans that were the real problem.

  “These damn jeans,” he muttered, trying to tug at the waistband.

  Jubilee, lounging in the backseat with Kitty and Bobby, smirked.

  "That's what you get for havin' a thick-booty, Dunkie." Jubilee snorted.

  Alamo shot her an incredulous look, tipping his cowboy hat up slightly. "What the hell, a lil' respect here."

  Jubilee wasn’t done.

  "Dude, you gotta stop workin' those glutes, you're givin' Roguey here a run for her money."

  Rogue, eyes still locked on the road, let out a small snort, but didn’t comment. She wasn’t about to deny it outright.

  Alamo twisted in his seat, turning to glare at the back row where Jubilee, Iceman, and Kitty Pryde were already cracking up.

  "Jubes, what the fuck."

  Kitty was laughing so hard she had to cover her mouth, while Bobby looked utterly conflicted between amusement and discomfort.

  "I'm just sayin' our southern friends here got nice legs and asses. Right, Bobby?" Jubilee continued, her tone far too smug.

  Bobby’s face immediately turned three shades redder.

  "Ahm, yeah no, like yeah... but y’know not in a weird way," he stammered, clearly regretting being dragged into this.

  Jubilee nodded sagely, leaning back like she had just made a profound point. "Y'know, Bobby likes it, I think."

  Before Bobby could even react, he elbowed Jubilee hard, nearly knocking her into Kitty.

  "What the hell, Jubes. I'm not looking at his butt, or any man's butt that is. You weirdo."

  Rogue, who had been silent up until now, finally cut in, her voice half-exasperated, half-amused.

  "Yeah, Jubilee, stop bein' a horny lil’ gremlin."

  Jubilee gasped theatrically, clutching her chest like she’d just been mortally wounded.

  "I'm not horny, swamp bug... I'm bein' funny and whimsical."

  "Jubilee, that is not what whimsical means," Kitty said between stifled giggles.

  "Whatever, it's funny gnome shit, I saw it on TikTok. The funny green hat gnome, whimsical little creature" Jubilee shot back, utterly unapologetic.

  The car roared forward down the open highway, the sound of their laughter echoing into the warm evening air.

  The car pulled into the massive parking lot, the Walmart sign glowing against the early evening sky. Rogue cut the engine, tapping her fingers against the steering wheel as she turned to face the others.

  "Walmart? Couldn't it be H-E-B?" Alamo muttered, adjusting his hat as he stepped out.

  "We are in New York, Duncan," Rogue shot back, shaking her head. "Ain't no H-E-B 'round here."

  "Shit, yeah," he grumbled, rubbing his chin. "I wanted their ice cream an' their Mi Tienda stuff. We could get like, do-it-yerself tortillas an’ make tacos."

  "Oh yeah, tacos would be awesome," Bobby agreed immediately, looking over at Rogue with hopeful eyes.

  "Damn straight," Alamo said, pointing at him approvingly.

  "No tacos," Rogue said firmly. "Too much trouble. Get snacks and drinks—party stuff. Couple beers to shut Logan up and some cheap liquoh fer Remy."

  "Rogue," Kitty cut in, shaking her head, "Scott totally told us not to buy Remy alcohol."

  "Yeah, he'll absolutely get drunk and puke on the couch again," Bobby added.

  "Worse than that, he'll get shit-faced, and She-Hulk will puke on the couch," Jubilee corrected, wagging a finger.

  Alamo blinked. "Wait, wait. She didn't go with the Avengers?"

  Jubilee smirked. "No, Dunkie, she disappeared with Remy."

  "Oh shit."

  "As long as they don’t break anythin’," Rogue sighed, already imagining the possible disaster awaiting them back at the mansion.

  With that, they finally stepped inside the Walmart, the automatic doors sliding open with a low hum.

  "I'm gonna check the Legos and the action figures," Jubilee announced excitedly.

  Rogue groaned. "Jubilee, we’re here fer snacks and drinks, not damn toys."

  Jubilee only grinned before darting off into the aisles.

  "Y'know, I kinda want to check it out too," Alamo muttered, glancing toward the toy aisle.

  Rogue snapped her head toward him, giving him the most disappointed look possible.

  "No way, Duncan, ya're an adult," she deadpanned.

  Alamo scoffed, crossing his arms. "What, since when can't adults like Legos?"

  "Mah God," Rogue sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. She turned to Kitty and Bobby, pointing them toward the snack aisle. "Kitty, Bobby, go get the snacks. Ah’ll get the drinks while the children go see their Legos."

  "Very funny, Rogue," Alamo muttered under his breath, already heading toward the toy section.

  By the time he got there, Jubilee was already in deep contemplation, staring at the Lego display like a general strategizing a battlefield.

  "Dude, there's like 501st Legion Battle Packs here," she said, eyes gleaming. "I think I'm gonna buy them."

  This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

  Alamo raised an eyebrow. "Did you bring money?"

  Jubilee froze for half a second, then coughed awkwardly. "Ahem... no. I was kinda hoping you'd buy 'em for me."

  Alamo sighed, shaking his head. "What? No, Jubilee, I ain't buyin' ya no Legos."

  Jubilee immediately turned on the puppy eyes, lower lip quivering like a pro manipulator.

  "Pretty pleeeaaase..." she pouted.

  Alamo exhaled sharply, rubbing the back of his neck. Damn it. He could feel his resolve crumbling already.

  "Whatever," he grumbled. "But just the 501st Battle Pack, nothin' else."

  Jubilee gasped dramatically, throwing her hands in the air. "Not even a Captain America figure?"

  "No," Alamo said flatly, before grabbing one of the action figures himself. "That I'm buyin’ fer myself."

  Jubilee burst out laughing. "You glorious jerk."

  Alamo tipped his hat, giving her a self-satisfied smirk. "Let's get outta here 'fore Rogue mauls us to death."

  Jubilee clutched her Lego box like a prized possession. "Wise words, Jedi Master."

  And with that, the two turned toward checkout, hoping they didn’t get caught slacking.

  They made their way back to the snack aisle, where Kitty and Bobby were locked in a heated debate over chip selection.

  "Bobby, we're not getting Funyuns," Kitty declared, arms crossed.

  "Kitty, please," Bobby groaned, gesturing toward the bag. "They're the best snack here."

  "What? No, Funyuns are horrible."

  "What about—"

  "Doritos, Bobby," Jubilee cut him off like a judge slamming a gavel. "Doritos or Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, no exception."

  Bobby threw up his hands in frustration. "Great. Just great."

  Before he could continue protesting, his eyes landed on the Lego box Jubilee was cradling like a precious artifact.

  "Wait, why are you holding a Lego?" Bobby asked.

  Jubilee grinned. "Dunkie’s buyin’ for me, right, Dunkie?"

  Alamo shot her a look but said nothing, choosing to pick his battles wisely. Instead, he straightened his hat and exhaled.

  "I'm goin' to find Rogue," he said, already stepping away. "Y'all settle down and don’t destroy the buildin' or freeze it."

  Kitty raised an eyebrow. "Us? Never."

  "We'll be nice," Bobby assured, though his smirk suggested otherwise.

  Alamo narrowed his eyes at Jubilee specifically. "Better be. Jubilee, No funny business."

  "Gotcha, Captain," she said, giving a mock salute.

  Alamo sighed and turned, walking toward the drink aisle, distancing himself from whatever chaos was brewing behind him.

  As he disappeared, Kitty’s gaze drifted back to Jubilee. Her eyes squinted.

  "Wait… was that a Captain America toy?" Kitty asked, pointing at the box in Alamo’s other hand.

  Jubilee grinned. "So cool, right?"

  Kitty shook her head in disbelief, turning to Bobby. "You have the weirdest of friends, Jubilee."

  Jubilee shrugged. "You two are my friends."

  Kitty deadpanned immediately. "Exactly."

  Finally, Alamo made his way back to Rogue, who was already balancing three stacks of 12-packs of soda—Coca-Cola, Sprite, and Dr. Pepper—like it was nothing.

  He raised an eyebrow. "Want some help?"

  "Yeah," Rogue huffed. "Go get the beer and the cheap whiskey."

  Alamo glanced at the sodas. "Ya got Dr. Pepper."

  Rogue smirked. "Of course, sugah. Ain’t that what y’all Texans bleed?"

  "Not all of us," Alamo mused, adjusting his hat, "but I do."

  "Great, so Ah wasn’t wrong."

  Alamo sighed. "No…"

  Rogue nodded in satisfaction. "Now just the booze fer the drunks."

  Alamo turned toward the liquor aisle but paused when Rogue’s sharp green eyes flicked downward.

  She squinted.

  "...Would ya be a gentleman—wait, is that a toy ya got?"

  Alamo glanced at the Captain America figure in his hand like he had completely forgotten about it.

  "Yup."

  "Jesus, Duncan."

  "Don’t worry 'bout it none," he said smoothly, already backing away before she could make another remark. "I’ll go get yer booze."

  Rogue rolled her eyes, shifting the soda stacks in her arms.

  "Go, go," she waved him off.

  Eventually, they all found their way back to the cashier, their haul stacked up on the conveyor belt.

  "Alright, so we got the cokes, the snacks—Jubilee, ya got candy bars?" Rogue asked, glancing at her expectantly.

  Jubilee grinned and held up a handful of chocolate bars. "Oh, yes."

  Rogue sighed but nodded. "Alright, fine... That’s it."

  Bobby suddenly perked up. "Could we order pizza, Rogue?"

  Rogue tilted her head in thought. "Not sure, Bobby. Gotta check with Storm, ya know how she is."

  Bobby winced slightly. "Fair, fair."

  She then turned to Alamo. "Duncan got the booze?"

  Alamo held up the beer pack with one hand and the whiksy bottle with the other. "Yep, I got the beer and the whiskey."

  Rogue shook her head and sighed. "An' of course y’all got yer toys."

  "Hell yeah," Jubilee said proudly, hugging her Lego box before giving it to the cashier to scan.

  The cashier, barely looking up, started scanning the items.

  "Your total is 253 dollars," they said flatly.

  Rogue reached for her wallet. "Just let me—"

  Alamo stepped forward, shaking his head. "No, Rogue. I got this."

  Rogue paused, eyeing him curiously before shrugging. "Okey."

  Without hesitation, Alamo pulled out a black card, casually sliding it over the counter.

  Kitty’s eyes went wide. "Woah, I didn’t know you were rich, Dunkie."

  Bobby whistled. "Cowboy with the fat stacks."

  Jubilee smirked. "And a fat ass."

  Alamo snapped his head toward her, deadpan. "Jubilee, what the hell."

  Rogue just shook her head, suppressing a laugh. "Jus’ let him live a bit, Jubes."

  Jubilee threw up her hands in surrender. "Right-O, ma’am."

  With the bill paid, they gathered up their bags and headed back out to the parking lot, the cool night air greeting them as they made their way to the car.

  They left the store and headed back to Rogue’s Celica, the night air cool against their skin as they loaded up the trunk with their Walmart haul. The parking lot was mostly empty, save for a few scattered cars and flickering streetlights.

  Then, as Kitty closed the trunk, two burly men approached.

  They were the type you’d find loitering outside a gas station at midnight—beer-brand t-shirts stretched tight over their stomachs, faded baseball caps, and the distinct scent of cigarettes and cheap alcohol trailing behind them.

  They stopped just short of the group, eyes narrowing as they looked the mutants up and down.

  "Got yourselves lost, muties?" one of them sneered.

  Kitty lifted her hands slightly, keeping her voice even. "We don’t want any trouble, Mister."

  Alamo, who had been standing near the trunk, stepped forward. Two steps. Just enough to put himself between the guys and the others.

  His voice came out calm, but firm. "Why don’t y’all take a hike?"

  The first man let out a nasty chuckle. "Oh, Dixie boy lost his way home…"

  The other spit onto the pavement, eyes locked on Alamo’s X-logo shirt. "We don’t take kindly to mutant confederates in our town."

  Alamo’s eye twitched. "Oh, fuck off."

  The two men clenched their fists, and for a long, tense moment, it looked like a fight was about to break out.

  Then—

  "Syke!"

  Fireworks exploded directly in their faces.

  A burst of colorful sparks and flashing light, blinding them instantly.

  "ARGH!" one of them stumbled back, hands grabbing at his eyes.

  "You little—"

  "We’ll kill you!" the other roared.

  "JUBES!" Rogue whirled around, already glaring.

  Jubilee popped her gum, blowing a small bubble before it snapped. "What? It’s called conflict resolution."

  Before the men could regain their footing, the ground beneath them turned to ice—Bobby had casually flicked his wrist, sending a thin sheet of frost across the pavement.

  The two men instantly lost their balance and hit the ground hard, their boots slipping uselessly.

  "Jesus Christ," Alamo stared at them like they had all lost their minds. "Is this how y’all X-Men solve problems?!"

  Rogue had already grabbed him by the arm, dragging him toward the car. "Duncan, shut up an’ get inside the damn car."

  Kitty, now fully done with this situation, simply phased through the car door and into her seat without another word.

  Jubilee and Iceman, giggling like maniacs, dove into the backseat after her.

  Alamo groaned, rubbing his temples. "God damn it, ya two."

  "It’s mindless fun, Dunkie," Jubilee sang, already reclining.

  "It’s just mindless," Alamo muttered, pulling his hat lower over his face as he slid into the passenger seat.

  Kitty, adjusting her seatbelt, glanced at him in the rearview mirror. "They’ll be fine, Mr. Alamo."

  Alamo sighed, shaking his head. "I can’t believe I stayed here fer this."

  Rogue started the car with a sharp smirk, shifting gears. "Buckle up, an' no more of this shit, alright?"

  The red Celica roared to life, and with one last glance at the two men still sprawled on the pavement, Rogue hit the gas.

  "Jesus Christ woman, stop drivin' like a maniac."

  "Ya scared of a little speed, Duncan?" Rogue smirked, her eyes still focused on the road as she sped along the streets.

  "No... I'm scared of yer insanity."

  "Hit the gas Rogue!" Bobby pratically jumped from his seat in excitement

  And Rogue did just that, the car now hitting over hundred miles as she merged onto he highway.

  "Let's go!" Bobby raised his arm above his head, like he was in a rollercoaster.

  "My god, y'all X-Men are just crazy idiots."

  "Have some fun, Dunkie!" Jubilee grabbed the back of his seat as she stood up in the from hers, arms opened under the cool moonlight air.

  "Jubilee get down here 'fore we get pulled over" Rogue pulled her down back to the seat, her left arm pulling down her jacket.

  "Please just get there fast, Rogue." Alamo crossed his arms, shaking his head in clear disapproval.

  "Shut up an' enjoy the ride, don'cha be square now, Duncan... This is the freedom ya like so much." She looked to the side, winking at him for a brief second.

  "Oh God, I should have stuck 'round Cap. Now I'm stuck with a bunch of insane asylum rejects."