Thirteen weeks and a grocery store fire after the fall

  There were no words to describe how happy I was to be free of those leather-clad bondage wannabes. Not only did the accountants turned cannibals eat people, but they had a clear aversion to being clean.

  To be fair, living in an apocalyptic wasteland surrounded by men in leather so skimpy it would make a nun blush, probably didn’t foster a massive desire to be clean. I wish it did, but when all you had was a sailor’s hat and ass-less chaps… what’s the point of washing just to get covered in blood and ash again?

  As I hovered in the sky above the WalStore turned portal to hell, I realized that society had lost everything it once was. The desire of man to be better and achieve greater had died in favor of becoming just another cog in the machine. At some point, humanity had stopped innovating and simply chosen to survive.

  It wasn’t their fault. The government, solely focused on wealth and power, adopted the ancient strategy of dumbing down the masses. Instead of teaching children to think independently, they taught them to take tests and repeat facts. Eventually, the children were so beaten by the system, most didn’t bother to question the world around them. The few that did had no clue how to come to their own conclusions without being guided by an authority figure.

  And that was how they’d become what they were now. By stripping away the rigid structure that society had created, they had no clue how to handle the freedom of not being told what to do. While that most certainly didn’t excuse eating people, it explained why so many joined a gang for the promise of drugs and suspended reality. Even if it meant wearing ridiculous outfits.

  Wrapping my hands around the controls of the air-car, I pointed the vehicle toward the only place I could call home anymore. They accepted me into their society despite the knowledge that I had very little to offer. Acceptance was their creed, tolerance their motto, and patience, their way of life.

  Even if my day ended with blood on my hands, it was better than forcing these kind people to raise their fist in anger. Because of my actions, they would never have to dirty their own hands with the blood of the slain. If we could stay under the radar and ensure the Mutated never found us, they might survive just long enough to rebuild Earth.

  ~~**~~

  “Could you goddamned bastards have worse timing!?” Chuck screamed at my air-car as I landed on the roof of our building. “We don’t have taxes for you today. We are dealing with a bigger problem than starving brutes that can’t get their shit together.”

  “Well, good afternoon to you, too.” I replied, jumping out of the driver’s seat and waving my mostly restored hand at the big man.

  I imagined the welcome I would receive while I was flying. Part of me was convinced it would be something grand, a parade perhaps. Another part thought it would just be a high-five and a feast in my honor. What I didn’t expect was the heavy right hook that dislocated my jaw and threw me to the ground.

  Chuck grabbed my bloodstained dress and dragged me to the edge of the roof, snarling, “You have some nerve coming back here! Do you know how many people died since your little disappearing act? I do, and it’s more than I want to remember. But I have to. I have to remember their faces and talk to their loved ones. You did that. You killed those people by leaving.”

  “That’s a real shitty way to say thank you.” I shoved my jaw back into place and let it heal before his eyes. “I don’t know what happened while I was gone, but the accountants are no longer a part of it.”

  Chuck eyed me hard, trying to decide if I was lying or if I really didn’t know about the devastation that rocked our little community. Apparently, he decided that revenge wasn’t worth it and pulled be back from the edge of the roof.

  “Explain.”

  “Well… I went hunting accountants the other night. Sadly, they found me first,” I started, motioning to the door. “This story really is better if I only tell it once. Care to go in?”

  ~~**~~

  “You did what?” Mrs. McGee said, clutching her pearls in horror.

  The old woman had stared at me with her mouth open while I recounted my experience in the WalStore with what I thought was admiration. Apparently, slack-jawed respect and abject horror look the same when the person prides themselves on their civility.

  “I trapped the accountants in their building and burned it down around them. Why is that so hard to understand?”

  “It’s not that it’s hard to understand, you psychopath. It’s that you’re standing here telling us the story while eating a sandwich like nothing happened. Aren’t you disturbed?”

  Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  Raising the sandwich in question to my mouth, I took a bite before continuing, “Not really? It’s not the first time people decided I make a good barbecue. Much as I would like it to be, it probably won’t be the last either.”

  “I’m talking about burning them alive!” she screamed, raising the tension in the room.

  “Well, how else was I supposed to do it? I’m only one person. I can’t kill them all and burn the bodies.”

  “Why did you have to burn them?” she said, nostrils flared. “Humanity is already going to have a tough enough time rebuilding without someone like you going around killing half of the people we’ve met.”

  “Humans have recovered from worse than this. The population dropped to 3,000 after the Toba super-volcano erupted and caused a three-year volcanic winter, but they bounced back. That’s not the point, though. I didn’t burn down the building because of some maniacal desire to start fires. I burned the building down because I needed to escape. If I’m being honest, I had no clue how I was going to actually start the fire until the opportunity literally tripped me with a bundle of cables the size of my arm.”

  If the old lady thought she was going to shame me for surviving, she had another thing coming. I understood that a lack of population would make things difficult in the coming years. But that didn’t mean we could let psychotic assholes eat people just because they could make a baby.

  “You are a madman and a butcher. I just hope Chuck and the others see through your ridiculous fa?ade before it’s too late!” she said, shoving a finger into my chest before stomping down the stairs.

  “As fucked up as it is that you burned down an entire building with people inside,” Sparky said from her place on a water reclamation barrel. “I can see why it you did it. She may not be happy about it, but that’s probably because she had a grandson in the gang… that’s usually how these things work out, right?”

  “Historically no, but it’s pretty common in half-baked literature.” Chuck replied, “Despite that, I can say that we’re glad you came home… and sorry for the punch.”

  “It’s fiiine. It’s not the first time someone punched me in the face,” I said, finishing the last bites of my sandwich. “I didn’t kill those people for glory or whatever. I killed them because they were eating other people and doing significantly more harm than good. Sure, their existence might mean more humans to repopulate the planet, but do we really want to rebuild our world on the backs of cannibal accountants?”

  “You keep emphasizing that accountants made up most of the WalStore gang. Is that important, or do you just not like accounting?”

  “What’s to like? A cannibal is one thing. I can overlook the occasional indulgence of people jerky, but accountants remind me of IRS agents from old earth.”

  Closing his eyes, Chuck took a deep breath while deciding whether to play along with my insanity or just move on. Sadly, he changed the subject, “We have bigger problems than the WalStore gang. While you were gone, the Mutated found us. We’ve been holding them off, but the attacks just keep getting stronger.”

  “Well, that only leaves two options. But looking at you, I can tell you already knew that.”

  “What did I miss?” Sparky asked, looking back and forth between them.

  “He already saw the problem and had a solution, but it’s not one that anyone will like,” Chuck answered, clarifying nothing.

  “Sparky, the problem is that once the Mutated find you, they won’t forget it. They will come back day after day until you either destroy their entire pod, or they destroy you,” I explained.

  “So, we go on the offensive.”

  “Not necessarily. We can also move everyone underground and start scouting for a new home. Now that we have power, we can even set up hydro gardens down there if we need to. Eventually, the Mutated will realize there is no more food and wander off.” I said, “But that will mean our entire colony living in the sewers. Yes, they’ll be alive, but I’m not too certain people want to make that trade.”

  “What was option two?” she asked.

  “Option two is to pack up everything we can and walk away. Go down into the tunnels and get as far away as we can before coming back to the surface. With any luck, we can fix a train and get even farther. Vandre has taught us how to rebuild on our own, so him staying to lock the door behind us isn’t the worst thing.”

  “Wait, I’m not ok with this. We’re not leaving him behind while we escape,” she said, horrified.

  “Someone has to stay back. Best case, I can set up some kind of bomb that will collapse the tunnel entrance and make sure you can’t be followed. I’ve lived a long life, and if the tides of fate will it, I will find you again,” I whispered.

  “No, fuck that. You’re not sacrificing yourself for us. I don’t care if you’re immortal or not, you still feel pain.”

  “Chuck,” I said, turning my attention to the big man while slipping my hands into my pockets, “start getting people and their things underground. Anything you don’t need or can replicate, throw out of the window near the door to build up the barrier. Leave me about fifty kilos of the gardening chemicals, though. I’ll need those.”

  “Got it. Thank you. But… just so you know, you don’t need to do this,” he said again.

  “Yes, I do,” I said. When the pair turned to leave, I caught Sparky’s arm and held her back. “I will not die. The day I met Chuck, I’d just recovered from a bullet to the brain. I can handle a few mutant humans.”

  “It’s not fucking right and you know it,” she spat.

  “Look, Spar– Rebbecca. This isn’t the end. I’ll find you again. I’ll find all of you. In the last twelve weeks, I’ve begun to relearn something I’d forgotten long ago,” I said, staring out of the window at the ruins of New York City.

  “And that is?”

  “That I care what happens to humanity… And that I enjoy having a home.”

  “What kind of lesson is that? Why wouldn’t you care about humanity?” She started, but stopped herself before she really got going, “Nevermind. I forgot who I was talking to. If you really want to find us, I’ll be guiding us north to Scranton and past that to Buffalo. Hopefully, you catch up by the time we get there.”

  “I’ll try. Find a place to live without being hunted by humans and mutated alike. Make sure these people prosper. You’re a smart woman. Between you and Chuck, this community will thrive. You’ve got this. You don’t need my help. Go where the winds may take you, and if they are kind, we will meet again. Now if you don’t mind, I need to make a bomb and you need to get people underground.”

  “Can you defend yourself when you get out?”

  “I’m sure I’ll find Prince Albert somewhere. It was a good weapon, and it’ll protect me until something better comes along.”

  I didn’t know what else to say. We weren’t romantic; we were barely even friends. But that didn’t change the looming knowledge that I would once again be alone. I wished it weren’t true, but the sad reality of my life is that solitude has long been my only companion. It was a law of this world as unchanging as the stars in the sky.