The meaning of life should be that it has no meaning. You make of it what you see fit. For those that value family affection, the meaning of life is spending it with those that you love. For those of the ambitious kind, life only has meaning once you get what you desire.

  Take the shambles that life gives you and make something out of it. Build an empire, build a legacy, destroy what you were given. It doesn’t matter, at least to the others. For you, that’s a different business, maybe you’ll get to the grave knowing that you build something. Even if time, the destroyer of worlds catches up to you sooner rather than later.

  Living to the fullest with the cards that you were given, even when time comes, you would have left an indelible print in the world, flap your wings, let the storm come.

  I went to Professor McGonagall’s office, and the door opened automatically, as if waiting for my arrival.

  I entered Prof. McGonagall’s office, the interior of her office just reflected her owner’s temperament, a tidy, clean and practical place. If you ignore the Quidditch paraphernalia scattered throughout the room.

  “Good night, Prof. McGonagall” I greeted her with some nervousness.

  “Good night, Mr. B – Solé” she slipped right there; well, this is only the second time that we have met.

  “Mr. Solé, can you explain your behaviour to me, if I may ask?”

  “What behaviour, do you mean my tantrum during the sorting ceremony Prof. McGonagall?”

  “That behaviour indeed Mr. Solé” at least she was getting used to my ‘Surname’.

  “I didn’t expect to be called that early Professor McGonagall”

  “Even then, I wouldn’t have expected such rude behaviour during the sorting ceremony, are you aware that your actions delayed the ceremony for almost five minutes?”

  “If that’s why you called me here, then I should apologize, and I don’t mind being put into detention. But I also want to get some answers, why did the school insist on using the surname of my non-existent father? Prior to the acceptance letter, I didn’t even know that I had a father.”

  “I don’t have all the answers to your enquiries Mr. Solé” her expression told me that she was a little uncomfortable, judging by her office, I can assume that she is a by the books type of person, it should be bothering her address a student by an alias of nickname.

  “Me neither, I just know that I was happy being James Acrux Solé, a testament to the angel that once walked among us. But Hogwarts one day declared that I wasn’t. Leaving me to be the bastard of a death eater surnamed black.”

  “That isn’t the intention of Hogwarts child, we didn’t mean that”

  “Then why did the school insist that I carry with that man’s surname”

  “It was just a mistake, we can’t know everything that happens to every single little wizard in the United Kingdom, the process for issuing a letter of acceptance is an automated process, it’s the joint work of the Book of Admittance and the Quill of Acceptance. We don’t have a direct input in the process.”

  “But in my response to the school, I asked not to be called by that surname”

  She looked a little sad, and tired “James, we can’t know when a reply is serious, and when it is just a prank. Just this year, the child of the Weasleys replied to us asking to be called ‘Ickle Ronniekins’, tell me James, did the school have to accept that request.”

  Tear were beginning to run down my eyes “But I wasn’t pranking”

  “James, tell me, how did you sign your reply”

  “I wasn’t joking”

  “I’m sorry James, the school didn’t mean to hurt you”

  “I wasn’t…”

  She stood up from her desk, approached me and brought me into a hug. I couldn’t stop crying, I was so stupid, everything was my fault. How cheeky of me to reply like that.

  I just felt empty inside, I didn’t matter that I just had supper, my heart ached. I just wanted to run. The only clown had always been me. How could I dare question Prof. McGonagall when, everything was just my fault.

  I cried; I cried loudly. How beautiful it could have been, if I just didn’t mess around. There shouldn’t have been a James Acrux Black in this world.

  “Don’t say that James, it wasn’t your intention. Everyone has a place in this world, every life has a meaning. Don’t say that dear” Professor McGonagall sobbed with me.

  I remained in her embrace for a while, I couldn’t remember, when was the last time someone had hugged me?

  I had regained my composure, my eyes still stung, my embarrassment couldn’t let me lift my head.

  We remained in silence for a while.

  “You should go to sleep James”

  “Thank you, Professor McGonagall,”

  I left Professor McGonagall’s office like a zombie, even if I bawled my eyes out, I still felt deeply hurt. But I didn’t have anyone to blame, everything was my own fault.

  I walked slowly to the Hufflepuff basement, I have come to realize that I’m not that mature, I need help. I need a guide, a helping hand, or just someone to lean on.

  When I returned to my dorm room everyone was waiting for me, there wasn’t pity in their eyes, it was something else, something warm and precious.

  “You okay mate? Wanna grab a bite or something, the house elves make some scrummy biscuits.” Justin was just, well, he was just himself.

  “They won’t punish you, would they? My brother told me that Mr. Filch, had many torture tools.” I don’t know what has Wayne’s brother done, but I don’t think it was light.

  “You shouldn’t worry, at worst you will process potion ingredients with professor snape, or carry dragon manure, nothing truly difficult.” If Ernie said this, then I shouldn’t worry about any punishment.

  “Well, Prof. McGonagall didn’t say anything about punishment, so I think this was the end of the matter.”

  We ate some biscuits, put on some music and started talking about school, I shouldn’t be going wandering around all by myself. Cedric was right, we Hufflepuffs should stay together.

  Next morning I woke up early again, woke up my roommates and started to get ready for the day.

  Yesterday we decided to rearrange our beds, so after everyone had finished their morning routine, we moved the bedside cabinets to the centre of the room, put them together to form a large desk and moved the beds in a circular pattern. It is easier to chinwag this way, and putting the Rad-ant’s at the centre gave us better acoustics; our trunks will do as chair’s.

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  Having done this, we went to the kitchen, there we met the House elves, they looked nothing like the elves portrayed in muggle media, they were short with big eyes and bigger ears. They didn’t have too much clothing, just a tea towel or a pillowcase. But nothing that indicated their status as Hogwarts workers.

  We got a simple but hearty breakfast; they told us that we should leave a note in our dorm if we needed anything. I went like four times to get another serving of breakfast.

  Ernie took a pocket watch and told us that it was time to get going. We had History of Magic in the first period.

  History is a captivating subject, it lets you travel in time, leaving everlasting lessons that impact your present and future. But Hogwarts History of Magic just sends you to dreamland. Professor Binns gave class in a deeply hypnotic tone, he could turn a bloody war story into a snooze fest.

  We left History of Magic refreshed, that was one of the best naps we had had in our entire lives, the only downside would be that we needed to self-study the lessons, because we didn’t remember anything the professor said.

  We had a free period before lunch and wandered the castle. There was some time before lunch when we stumbled into the owlery, there I saw Radio G. cosying up to some other owl. But he was clearly failing to do so. When I saw him, I remembered, that I needed to write something to Gringotts, I needed some change. Everything that happened since I came to Hogwarts had distracted me, and I forgot this.

  I took some parchment from my sling bag and wrote a letter to Mr. Ragnok. I needed twenty-one gallons of which, I needed seven to be in sickles and other seven in knuts. I decided that I shouldn’t write to Bill yet, maybe at the end of the month, updating each other once a month seemed like a good arrangement.

  We continued familiarizing ourselves with the castle, spent a good amount of time in the moving staircases. To be honest, we got lost, going up and down, falling down the disappearing steps, it took a good amount of time getting the gist of it. We couldn’t always follow a senior.

  Yesterday I just followed the group when going to the Defence Against the Dark Arts. At least we discovered that going to the ground floor was very easy, we just had to take a leap of faith. That would come in handy tonight, we had an Astronomy class at midnight.

  We got a little sidetracked and almost missed lunch. We grabbed a bite and ran to the green house, we had Herbology with Professor Sprout, our dean. We couldn’t be late for her class.

  Herbology was an interesting class. I can’t see myself in the future tending to a garden, but I knew the importance of learning this course. It wasn’t just taking care of magical plants, it also teaches us how to recognize these plants, what to do in case we consume them, or how to avoid being injured by them. Professor Sprout told us about some unlucky wizards that died in the wild taking the wrong herbs.

  When the class ended, I put away my gloves, and got ready for a quick shower, we didn’t shovel dragon manure, but the greenhouse made me sweat.

  “James child, could you stay for a moment” Professor Sprout called me before I could leave the classroom.

  “How may I help you Prof. Sprout”

  “Principal Dumbledore asked me to tell you that he’ll wait for you in his office. Don’t worry James, it isn’t anything serious. The password is Fizzing Whizzbees.” She gave me an encouraging look.

  “Alright Professor, I will go right away.”

  “Good, see you later James” Every word that came of her mouth was filled to the brim with warmth and care. She made sure that I wasn’t nervous, about my upcoming talk with the headmaster.

  I walked to the seventh floor, but I didn’t listen clearly to what Prof. Sprout told me about the headmaster’s office, I only heard about the password.

  So, I asked the Fat lady’s portrait for directions, she told me that I just needed to walk to a stone gargoyle and say the password. She was a very helpful lady, I promised to talk to her on another occasion, maybe let her listen to some music.

  I went to the stone gargoyle and when I said the password, the gargoyle gave way to a spiral staircase, I hopped in and let them carry me to the principal’s office. Once there I knocked on the door.

  “Please come in James”

  I entered the office, it was incredibly spacious, the walls were filled with portraits, from former Principals, I guess. Professor Dumbledore sat behind a big desk, behind him there were many books, in front of him atop his desk there was a silver magical artifact, that emitted a silvery mist every now and then.

  His office didn’t seem that magical, or at least I could pinpoint his extraordinary nature. Except for one thing, a beautiful and majestic scarlet bird, I have seen many beautiful birds, on tv or at the zoo, but I had never seen one like the one in the headmaster’s office. I could only describe it as a flame that came to life.

  “Maybe we can admire Fawkes sometime later James, but we need to talk before that.” Professor Dumbledore’s voice brought me back to reality, I was deeply fascinated by the bird named Fawkes.

  “I’m sorry professor.”

  “Don’t be sorry boy, you haven’t committed any mistake, sometimes I also get fascinated by Fawkes, he’s truly a unique creature, and a great companion.”

  I walked to Professor Dumbledore, he stood up and approached me, he gave me a firm handshake and with a simple hand gesture two seats rose from the floor, he invited me to sit and took the other seat.

  “Any refreshment’s my boy?” one little table was conjured between the two of us, and a tray of squirming cockroaches, they were very off putting, but Professor Dumbledore didn’t seem to mind and popped one into his mouth.

  “Thank you, maybe later Professor”

  We sat there in silence for a while. The silence was starting to bother me but, he seemed very nonchalant about it. He just ate the cock roaches one at the time. After a little while I just spaced out and took one in my mouth. I wanted to spit it out, but that would be very rude, no one had pushed me to eat one. So, I just bit into it. It was sweet, a little chocolatey and nutty, the crunchy exterior made it pleasant to chew, so I took another one, and another.

  “They can seem a little off putting but appearances may deceive you. Just like every-flavour beans, you may get a cherry flavoured one, but it may be as likely to get a Booger flavoured one. In my experience the prettier ones are the grossest.”

  “You’re right Professor” I clearly remembered that in the Hogwarts Express I got an Earwax flavoured one.

  I got clearly more relaxed then when I first entered the room and continued eating the gross looking but flavourful cockroach cluster.

  “I’m deeply sorry boy; it is never in our intention at Hogwarts to hurt our students. Hogwarts should always a place of warmth, nurture and peace that lets every little wizard discover their strengths and weaknesses, a place that lets you develop your talent at your own pace.”

  “I know professor”

  "It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be. So, don’t put too much thought into your origin, or who your father is. Remember who are you." He talked in a soft and gentle manner, he was right. But I wasn’t ready.

  “I know professor, but why should I carry with his surname? I’ve never known him”

  “The Book of Admittance and the Quill of Acceptance work with an ancient magic, no one can modify their working, not even me.”

  “So why?”

  “I don’t know if you are aware of the muggle way to determine the paternity of their children?”

  “Yes, one of my classmates got a paternity test when his parents were splitting up”

  “Well, this magic works in a similar manner, at least when the children aren’t registered in the ministry of magic, which frankly almost no one does.”

  “Have you had any similar cases?” it was certainly intriguing; the magic world didn’t seem to be that big and this kind of thing was particularly scandalous.

  “Yes, in numerous occasions, some had ended in particularly humorous scenarios, other not that positive looking.”

  “I may have an idea”

  “But your case is certainly not that common, you know the book has taken in consideration similar cases, and when a mother or the child truly hates the father, then they take the mother’s surname.”

  “I don’t hate him, neither did my mother, in her last letter she told me to not take it on him. I don’t hate him, but I don’t want anything to do with him.”

  “James, my boy, it fills me with joy knowing that there is no hate in your heart. That’s one of the deadliest poisons ever known to man. It not only affects yourself, but infects everyone around you, closing your heart to the amazing world that surrounds you and the love that waits for you.”

  “I have plenty of love in my heart, she gave me everything and more that I’ll ever need. Sometimes I had wished that she took me with her, but she asked me to live my life to the fullest, to do everything I do with joy and passion, to collect enough stories for our next reunion. She told me that we will need something to talk along the journey.”

  “Your mother was a very wise woman, Death isn’t the end of the road, it is just the beginning of our next adventure. I would have loved knowing her”

  “Thank you professor, she would have loved knowing Hogwarts.”

  “That’s for sure; we have the best school song.”

  “Ah, oh, uhm… she went to Ilvermony professor.”

  “Anyway, James, Minerva talked to me, and I think she’s right. So, I talked with the other professors, and we came to an agreement.”

  “What would it be professor?”

  “Well, you will need to attend a private tutoring with Professors Snape, McGonagall, Flitwick, Sprout and Quirrell, he was particularly enthusiastic about tutoring you.”

  “So, I’ll be having detention?”

  “No, James, my boy. It isn’t detention, take it as an apology, not every wizard can get private tutoring from our professors, they are some of the most knowledgeable wizards in all the magic world. But you’ll have to wait till next week to begin with your special tutoring”

  “Thank you, I guess?”

  “We’ll get along pretty well boy”

  Professor Dumbledore just laughed, I didn’t know if it was something good, or bad. I just knew that I had a little less than a week of liberty. I can at least accept professor dumbledore statement and be happy with the private tutoring.