Goldwynn was in the rear-view mirror. After crossing the rickety bridge into the fields of Westfarm, Nole followed the dirt road south along the riverbank that divided the two regions. It was an open change of scenery compared to the thick woods behind him, offering only farmland until the ocean of the western coast. First things first, however. It was time to check in at Sentry Hill, the outpost for adventurers in this area.

  A stone tower stood in the distance as Nole approached. Beneath it lay an inn much smaller than Lionshire’s, and the blacksmith had a scarcer selection of weapons, armor, and goods. The further players went from the main cities, the less there was to choose from. The stone wall along the borders was in ruins, like a sandcastle eroded by weather and time. Players between 10 and 20 buzzed around with their name tags following above.

  Nole checked in at the Windgryph stables. A small row of the winged beasts sat in stalls filled with hay, sporting purple and blue feathers and antlers. They had the heads, wings, and talons of birds with lower bodies of horses. Windgryphs provided travel among the airways, and by acquiring this area's flight path, you could easily return to this place for a small fee.

  As the Gryphmaster stamped his passport, a familiar name appeared in the chat.

  "Opportunity of a lifetime,” Dapple shouted shamelessly from a nearby tree stump like a soapbox. “Come one, come all!”

  Like Nole, she was an elf with light purple skin, facial markings, and long silver hair that overran the Cadet Shortbow on her back. She was a hunter.

  "You'll be kicking yourselves if you miss out on this," she barked. "I guarantee it!"

  Shortly, Nole stood beneath her, examining her leather gear set, which was severely outdated for level 10. The worn dagger and letter opener hanging from each hip barely qualified her to take on woodland critters. Other armor slots were missing entirely. Nole’s setup was nothing to write home about, but he almost felt guilty seeing hers now.

  “You’re everywhere,” Nole declared, shaking his head at her.

  “Huh?” Dapple uttered, glancing around until she finally noticed him below. “I am?”

  “I see your name in chat everywhere,” Nole pointed out. “I even left the area, and you’re back again.”

  Dapple smiled deviously.

  "That's because I'm following you," she teased. "I've got spies all over this place. And we're keeping a close eye on you, mister."

  “I wouldn’t be surprised at this point,” Nole laughed.

  “I’m just kidding,” Dapple admitted.

  She dropped down to her butt at the edge of the stump, watching him playfully as she swayed her dangling legs.

  “What’re you up to, anyway?” said Nole.

  “I’m glad you asked!” Dapple beamed, leaning forward in her seat with unpredictable bursts of energy that never ceased to catch him off guard.

  “I’m looking for an extremely lucky person to partake in a very lucrative endeavor with me," she said, tenting her fingers.

  “Oh yeah?” he humored her.

  Dapple slid off the stump and landed on her feet before him.

  “You’re in the right place at the right time, my friend,” she insisted. “What do you say?”

  “Sorry, I don’t have a credit card,” Nole told her. “You're wasting your sales pitch on me."

  “Eh?” Dapple blurted.

  She tilted her head at him and then, shortly, burst into laughter.

  “Oh no, it’s nothing like that,” she promised.

  “Seriously,” Nole went on. “I’m broke in-game and out, so you picked the worst person to scam.”

  “Scam!?” she protested. “Do I seem like a scam artist?”

  "I mean," Nole shrugged. "A damsel in distress, calling for help from a stump? If that’s not a trap, I don’t know what is.”

  "What makes you think I'm in distress?" she laughed.

  "I mean, have you seen your gear?" he joked. "That's distressing enough as it is."

  Dapple covered her eyes.

  "Instead of helping me, you’re roasting me," she groaned.

  "It works great for your story, honestly," Nole insisted. "Somebody, please! Come quick! Half my armor's gone missing."

  “You’re so mean,” she laughed. “I’m not a scammer!”

  "And that's exactly what a scammer would say," Nole replied.

  "Oh my gosh," she laughed. "Have a heart! I'm just a poor girl in need of help."

  “Pretending to be a girl, too?” he asked.

  Nole talked into his shoulder, pretending it was a police radio.

  "We got ‘em,” he joked. “A dude pretending to be a chick, scamming guys out of their money. They’re checking every box.”

  "No way!" she replied. "Why would I do that?"

  “The same reason everyone else does?” Nole replied. “For free stuff?”

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  Dapple couldn’t believe her ears.

  “You don’t get free stuff just by being a girl,” she argued.

  Nole raised his eyebrows.

  “Are you serious?" he replied.

  “That’s literally never happened to me,” Dapple insisted.

  “Are you that bad at being a girl?" Nole asked genuinely.

  “I’m actually a girl!" she said. "You're just making stuff up."

  "I'm not," Nole told her. "My friend has a girl character, and he gets free stuff all the time. It's like magnetism. Guys message him constantly, like, hey, do you need help? Hey, do you want some free stuff? Hey, let's be friends!"

  “That’s really creepy,” Dapple replied.

  "You would know," Nole told her.

  "I'm not a guy!" she argued.

  “That’s exactly what a guy pretending to be a girl would say,” he replied. “Textbook.”

  "Stop!" she laughed, burying her face in her hands.

  Dapple took a deep breath and composed herself.

  "Alright, I'll prove it," she said. “I have irrefutable evidence of my girl-ness.”

  "Please," Nole protested. "The last thing I need is some dude sending me photos of himself."

  “Stop!” she laughed. “You’re killing me here.”

  “Is that why your scam never works?” Nole joked. “You keep scaring them off with pictures of yourself before you even get the goods?”

  “Hey!" she snapped at him. "I'll have you know, I'm cute."

  “Sure,” Nole humored her. “Of all the catfish, I have no doubt you're the cutest."

  Dapple brushed it off.

  "I'll prove I'm a girl,” she declared. "Brace yourself, bucko.”

  "The floor is yours," Nole replied.

  Dapple took a big breath. Then, she rubbed her hands together, starting her engine.

  "So," she began. "I named my character after my favorite kind of horse. A Dapple Gray."

  "What?" Nole replied.

  "Dapple Grays,” she went on. “They have spots or patches that are lighter or darker than the main coat, sort of like polka dots. I love them so much."

  "What does that have to do with anything?" said Nole.

  "I just proved I'm a girl," Dapple declared triumphantly.

  "No, you didn't," said Nole.

  "Of course I did," she argued. "What's more girly than liking horses?"

  "I like horses," Nole told her.

  "So?" she replied.

  "So, I'm not a girl," he concluded.

  “So, what?" said Dapple.

  “So, you’re gonna have to do better than that, sir,” Nole told her.

  “Ugh,” Dapple groaned. “Fine. Ask me something.”

  “Okay,” Nole began. “Why are you pretending to be a girl on the internet?”

  "Hey!" Dapple snapped. "Ask me something for real."

  “Okay, okay,” Nole laughed, taking a moment to think. “What’s your name?”

  “As if,” she scoffed. “I’m not telling you that.”

  “Why not?” Nole shrugged. “I’ll tell you mine. It's Nole, like my character's name, but spelled differently."

  "I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that,” said Dapple, shaking her head. “Well, some of us aren't dumb enough to put our real name out there for the world to see.”

  "I'll even tell you my last name, too," Nole insisted.

  "Stop!" she exclaimed, covering his mouth with her hands. “Cut it out! You’re not supposed to tell people stuff like that!”

  Nole’s muffled laughter leaked out from beneath her fingers.

  "Next," Dapple insisted. "Next question. Move along, come on. Hit me with the next one."

  Nole tapped his foot and pondered.

  “Um,” he shrugged. “What kind of music do you like, I guess?”

  "Oh, there we go!" she beamed. "I like that one song that goes, you, shook me alllll nightttt long!"

  “Oh, by AC/DC?” Nole clarified.

  “I dunno,” she shrugged.

  “That’s by AC/DC,” he told her.

  “Okay, then that one,” Dapple nodded.

  "That's a good song," he admitted.

  “But my favorite song is Jungle Fever,” she added.

  “Never heard of that one,” said Nole.

  “It’s by Stevie Wonder," she told him. "It's about two people who aren't supposed to be together. But they're in love.”

  "Oh, so like you and all these guys you're catfishing?" Nole joked.

  “Wow," Dapple laughed, shaking her head. "I opened up and you tore me apart. I’m disappointed in myself. I should’ve seen that coming. You'll use anything I say against me, won’t you?"

  Suddenly, a lightbulb flipped on in Dapple's head.

  “Hey, I know!” she began. “My friend will vouch for me.”

  “Hm?” Nole humored her.

  “My friend Keki knows I’m a girl,” Dapple insisted.

  "Okay, where’s this Keki of yours?" Nole replied.

  Dapple checked her friends list only to backtrack shortly after.

  "Um, offline right now," she admitted. "But Keki will totally vouch for me!"

  Nole shook his head in secondhand embarrassment.

  “So,” Dapple pivoted. “Until then. Do you feel like helping me?”

  "Meh, sure," Nole shrugged. "I don't see why not."

  “Really!?” Dapple beamed. “You’re the first person that’s agreed to help me. I was getting worried I’d never find someone.”

  She sprung to her feet like a ray of sunshine.

  “Okay, so it’s a quest,” she exclaimed. “What I need is to bring this ‘ole booze bag quest giver some hops. Five hops, to be exact. But I’ve been searching all day, and I can’t find one frigging hop. I know I’m no rocket surgeon here, but I feel like I've looked everywhere."

  Nole's eyes glazed over as the wheels turned in his head.

  "Hops?" he asked. "I might actually know this one."

  Nole took her by the hand. They followed the dirt path out of Sentry Hill to the northern farmsteads, right before the fork in the road that led to the Western coast or back East to Goldwynn. The Salma family farm sat above the intersection, with its scarce trees, rickety farmhouse, and dry crops. Most notable were the hulking robot scarecrows hobbling atop the soil.

  Nole and Dapple entered a gaping hole in the picket fence and wasted no time engaging the nearest mechanical golem. His Moonbolt struck their foe through the top of its Boonie hat, followed by his Longstaff shortly behind it.

  The scarecrow whipped into action, bearing its sharp claws on either hand as Dapple skeptically joined in. Arrow after arrow flew from her bow, shaving away chunks of health with each hit. The scarecrow crumbled after their combined effort.

  "Yesss!" Dapple exclaimed, looting hops from the scarecrow’s corpse. "Four more."

  Nole was way ahead of her, already contesting the next scarecrow. He engaged the creature head-to-head while Dapple attacked from a distance, and shortly, more hops arrived in their possession. They rinsed and repeated their teamwork several times until Dapple had everything she needed.

  “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” she cheered, lifting Nole and hugging him.

  “Any time,” he laughed amid the squeeze.

  “Now I can finally rest in peace,” she admitted, wiping the sweat from her brow. “That’s probably going to be it for me tonight. Looking for hops and begging in chat all day has ruined me. I'll tell you one thing, though. I'm adding you to my friend list.”

  "Sure thing,” Nole smiled. “I’ll do the same.”

  “And together, we're going to be unstoppable,” she laughed maniacally, holding her arms out like a villain. “Muahaha!”

  Nole shook his head, suddenly feeling a pinch of regret.

  “Ut oh,” he humored her. “What am I getting myself into?”

  “Too late,” she grinned. “You’re mine now. I’m keeping you. Everywhere I go, you’re coming with me.”

  “Is that the catfish talking?" Nole joked. "You've been duped. 'Tis I, the guy playing a girl all along. But it's too late! I’m keeping you!”

  "Ugh," Dapple groaned, covering her face with her hand.

  She shook it off, and a big smile came over her.

  "Alright, you," she said. "Time to roll, Noley Nole."

  "As you wish, catfish," he replied.

  Dapple rolled her eyes.

  "It never ends," she concluded.

  She wrapped her arms around him, hugging him.

  “For real, though,” she said. “Thank you, Noley Poley. I hope you have a great night.”

  Nole smiled, hugging her back.

  "My pleasure, Dapple," he replied. “Good night.”