Meow

  The light receded as Alfred loosed himself from Dante’s robe

  …hell!!

  Dante finished his sentence as the world materialized around him with the return of his sight.

  What in the… where in the…. Am I still dreaming?

  Dante took in his surroundings in disbelief. Fear gripped him as what he could only describe as a lucid dream was revealed. Gone was his cluttered studio apartment. The recliner he salvaged from his parents home before their accident faded away to reveal a blank white open space.

  Am I dead? Is this heaven? If so, I can explain last night.

  Meow

  Stop trying to help Alfred.

  Meow

  No, the saying is “all DOGS go to heaven”.

  Hisssssssss

  Don’t look at me grumpy, I told you to leave the neighbors Siamese alone. How am I supposed to know what will happen to your kids?

  How do you do that? A measured distinctly female voice speaks from a rising mist.

  Dante fell to the ground, or what he assumed was the ground, digging his head in to show proper deference to this being.

  The most beautiful woman he had ever seen materialized as the clouds solidified. Her form was like someone cut out the best part of different models and fit them together perfectly. Her eyes were like looking into the deepest part of the universe. Her most alluring quality was her purple hair that bounced as she shifted positions.

  All around her the white space formed into a huge modern office with plush couches and an oak desk with a rolling chair. She took a seat behind the desk and motioned for him to do the same.

  Sit Mr. Mack, she said

  Dante could barely hear what was being said as actual shock set in. He could feel Alfred biting at his ankles and batting at his robe in an attempt to move him away.

  Sit! She said again, this time in an authoritative tone that filled the space..

  Please. This was spoken in a softer tone as if she had composed herself after flying off the handle.

  Meow.

  A chair materialized right behind Dante forcing him to sit and Alfred to scamper out of the way. A soft pillow formed under him, floating Alfred until he was next to his owner.

  Before we begin let me get the obvious out of the way. This is not a dream, everything you see here is completely real.

  Dante was brought back to focus by Alfred jumping onto his lap.

  Wait, what? Dante spluttered

  Which part should I repeat? She said

  Am I dead? Is this heaven? Dante asked

  He looked at Alfred and covered his ears, not wanting him to hear terrible news.

  Are we in.. you know? He attempted to mime his meaning with his eyes and a laughingly exaggerated head movement.

  The woman sat with a puzzled expression

  You Know! Dante said with another exaggerated head motion

  Hell?….. The woman said questioningly

  Shhh… Dante said, pulling a struggling Alfred closer to his chest.

  Not to worry Mr. Mack, You are not dead. Actually far from it… She began

  Good, he said with a sigh of relief. Because I was NOT prepared for that. Quietly he added “I’m also not one hundred percent on the cat heaven thing”.

  Meow

  Alfred finally freed himself from Dante’s grasp, jumping from Dante’s lap to the prepared cushion.

  Heheh, The woman let out an expectedly cute giggle. She tried to compose herself but the damage was already done.

  She coughed lightly into her fist

  You are an enigma, cross species communication does not normally work as flawlessly as you two. How do you do this? She said

  Dante and Alfred looked at each other before looking at her puzzled. Dante shrugged, unable to come up with a response.

  Me and Alfred? Well we’re just best buds, that’s what we do. Dante said

  Hmm.. She said contemplating

  Can we go home now or wake up? Dante asked as Alfred’s eyes went large in his best cute kitten impression.

  What? Oh no, you can not actually return to your universe. She said distractedly

  Panic filled Dante as his heart seemed to beat out of his chest. At the same time the hair on Alfred’s back began to rise.

  Fascinating, the woman said, it seems that there is some type of unspoken link between you two.

  You are the devil, I knew it. Alfred we are in hell. I told you you shouldn’t have barfed in that offering basket. Dante said

  After that they both got up and attempted to run away. As they created distance between them and the woman Dante’s heart began to calm a little. That was until he found himself and Alfred seated in the same seats they had just run away from. Repeated attempts yielded the same results. Each time the light chuckles of the woman gradually became a roaring laugh. Noticing this Dante and Alfred began to calm down.

  Ha Ha, do it again, do it again. She said trying to bring herself back under control

  Um God, Dante said, marshaling his courage.

  The woman quickly sobered as she focused her attention on them.

  I see the confusion, she said calmly. I am no God, there is only one of those.

  But what about… Dante began

  Trust me, there is only one. Regardless of what my contemporaries would have others believe. I and others of my kind are Administrators of universes. She said

  Confused, Dante sat speechless for a moment. This was either good news or bad news depending on what about God was actually the truth. He and Alfred were deathly afraid of the very possibility of landing in hell.

  If we aren’t dead then where are we? He asked

  Let me explain, She said

  First you can call me.. Hmm.. What would be a good human name? She thought out loud

  Allison, Dante blurted out

  This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.

  Your mothers name, also your first girlfriends and the love of your life’s name. Actually how you came across that many women named Allison who also became integral to your life is a mystery. It is also the name of the siamese Alfred impregnated… She said

  Meow

  Alfred suddenly found scratching the pillow to be the most interesting thing in this place.

  What?? Dante said, Is that why Brie stopped talking to me?

  Yes and No, the woman said. She had no idea how the cat became pregnant or that she did until long after she stopped talking to you. She actually found out who was stealing her cheese of the month deliveries.

  HeHe, the woman chuckled again. She was pissed, before that Brie actually really liked you. She was close to asking you out as you clearly were too afraid to.

  Dante buried his head in his hands embarrassed as Alfred reached over to put his paw on his shoulder.

  Those cheeses were so amazing, I can’t believe she took those away from me. Dante said

  Alfred rubbed his head on Dante to console him.

  The woman looked astonished, not believing that is what he was upset at. Shaking her head slowly from side to side she continued.

  Calling me Allison would be fine, my actual name is not something you would be able to understand or pronounce. And to answer your earlier question you are not dead. Where you are is in another universe… well a better way to explain where you find yourself would be a parallel world.

  Another world? Dante gasped as he and Alfred turned to look at Allison with their mouths open.

  Yes and you have the great honor to be transplanted here to take on an amazing quest. This challenge can lead to riches, glory and status. You will also be assisting this universe greatly. Very few have ever been granted this opportunity. You will be the first in this universe, and as its solo transplant you will be granted a major boon. Allison said, proud of her speech, knowing there is no way anyone could turn down this offer.

  No, we’re good thanks. Can you send us back now? Dante quickly said not even thinking about it. I have a book to finish writing and Alfred here has an apology to give and kids to raise.

  Meow

  Alfred looked ashamed as he turned his head to the side to sell the point.

  Wait, what?? Allison said

  Allison had given this speech countless times to many humans in different universes, so much so that this process had become boring. The chosen humans had always jumped at the possibility of leaving their boring lives behind in exchange for grand adventure. Never before had anyone said no, she was frozen for a moment.

  Allison…hello, can we go home… pretty please?? Dante said pleadingly

  Meow, Alfred agreed

  Uh, wha.. No…I mean that’s uh impossible. I mean I can not, there is no way. She said

  Dante’s face dropped as realization hit.

  So I won’t be able to finish my book or the lasagna in my fridge? Dante asked meekly

  Regaining her composure Allison responded tentatively and a little sheepishly.

  Unfortunately the trip is one way, the process to transfer you is so essence intensive that it can only be done once every ten years in your universe's time. That translates to one hundred years if you take the time conversion rate into account. Also the essence cost to send someone back is incomprehensible…. She said

  As Allison continued with her tangent Dante whispered to Alfred.

  What is she talking about? What is essence?

  …..And that is how I was able to transfer you two with little to no pushback from my boss. Are you two paying attention?

  We were, I swear. Dante said

  So what was I talking about? She demanded

  Something about essence, whatever that is. Dante said

  Allison realized she used the wrong strategy when she saw the blank stares in both of their eyes. Starting again she was determined to make the explanation as simple as possible.

  Ok, so as I mentioned before I am not a god, my title is Administrator. My kind oversees the countless networks of parallel worlds which we call strains. These clusters of universes are controlled by keepers, my boss is one of those and my hope is to one day gain that rank. Each keeper has the ability to imprint the template of what each universe will be using their essence.

  Dante lifts his hand as if he were in class.

  Before you interrupt, let me explain what essence is. It is the substance that sustains the multiverse. All but the main strain cannot operate without it, well there is one strain that has no essence but we don’t talk about that one. Man I feel sorry for that Admin he has to be so upset… wait where was I?

  Essence, Dante offered

  Oh right, so essence. Residents of these strains are able to manipulate essence in order to display fantastical powers and abilities….

  Wait, this can’t be true. In my world, how weird is it to say that Alfred

  Meow

  Yeah I know, I still think this is a dream also and I didn’t forget about you. In our world there is nothing like that. He added emphasis on the word “our” this time. No one has powers, if so there is no way that could be kept hidden. Unless you have powers you never told me about Alfred.

  Meow

  Allison could have sworn there was a head shake from the cat.

  I didn’t think so, there is no way any of this is true. Dante concluded with a smug look on his face.

  Your strain, she huffs, how can I put this in as sensitively as possible? The strain you came from has one of the weakest concentrations of essence I have personally ever seen. I mean I do not know how it sustained life really. I was surprised the boss allowed me to spend the essence to transfer someone from there. I mean even though we have a great laugh when watching your antics that’s normally all it is….

  You.. Were.. laughing at us? Dante said slowly as both he and Alfred looked at Allison dejected.

  No, it’s not like that. Allison said quickly, trying to defuse the situation. You two were our favorites from that strain. The Keeper selling transfers definitely tried to swindle us, I was the one who suggested you two as you are clearly a package deal. We were able to get a great price also. I consider it an amazing deal….

  Is this supposed to make us feel better? Dante said slumping in his chair with Alfred now hugging him

  It is a great honor, let me backup and give you the good news. Do you remember when I said Keepers had the ability to imprint templates on different strains?

  Yeah, I think I understand that. Dante said.

  Well with there being countless strains there are only so many ideas one being can come up with. With my boss being responsible for at least two thousand individual strains he needed new ideas. As I also mentioned you were our favorite from your strain. The only infuriating part for us is that you never seemed to really finish any of your books.

  It’s not really that easy, you know. I’ve been doing my best.. Dante started

  Meow, Alfred chimed in.

  Ok well not really my best. That you for your needless input cat. But I try at least. Dante amended.

  We have also taken a few ideas from some of the other authors on your world. Our challenge has been that we have not been able to have the hero’s story end up like the books. Either the friendships are not as solid or the underpowered farm boys die too early or the dark lords decimate the world before our challenger is powerful enough. You would also be surprised how hard it is for slaves to free themselves. Even with our nudges, chance meetings don’t happen like they are supposed to and willpower does not result in overpowered last minute power boosts. We are at wits end as my boss has had to wipe more than one strain where one powerful being had corrupted it. We need to create real heroes in order to increase the essence output in these strains. Each strain my boss wipes forces him to lose some of his overall essence. That will force him to have to part with some of his strains. If he has to do that he will lose a Keeper tier and he is literally at the lowest one before being barely considered a keeper. That puts all of his strains at risk. We need to develop at least one hero. Allison said

  Sorry to hear that, is there like a waiting room we can sit in until the next essence transfer or some sort of sleep capsule? How is this supposed to work? Dante asked

  Well heh, this will be a funny story in a few years. Allison said

  Dante had a sick feeling in his stomach. The last time he had this feeling Allison had broken up with him by letting him find her in bed with his next door neighbor when Dante was supposed to be at work. She said he wasn’t supposed to know but her text to him read “Come now, i’m in the mood”. Who types that if they don’t want to get caught?

  The funny thing is that I had an idea that my boss loved. I told him that since we couldn’t craft the perfect set of circumstances why don’t we let the author do it for us. We were intrigued by your latest book idea and the framework was imprinted on this strain. She said

  Wait, what I hadn’t gotten far in writing that book. Dante Interjected

  Meow, Alfred sounded in a fearful tone

  Well we may have taken the character outlines and worldbuilding framework from your notes along with your starting chapters and anything you told Alfred and used it as the basis for this strain. She continued

  Wait, what… Dante tried to get out.

  You will be joining in as your main character, we had to adjust the name and a few details. You know how it is…. Allison said mostly to herself.

  What?? Can I say no? I refuse!! he said in a panic

  Allison began to speak more hurriedly… Actually no, I started the process to send you down while we were speaking. But don’t worry, you will not be alone. We edited the framework to send Alfred with you..

  MEOW!! Alfred seemed to scream out.

  You know what I can explain in more detail after you are down there. No need to keep you from your adventure. Listen out for my voice, you can not miss it. Good luck traveler. Allison said as her voice faded away and she retreated into mist form.

  All of the furniture disappeared as Dante and Alfred dropped to the white void. Blinding light flashed as they experienced a feeling of falling uncontrollably. Dante gripped with terror passed out.