Chapter 5: Suppressing the UncontrolbleI wanted to develop mathematical thinking — deeply, seriously. So I began studying math with real commitment. But there was one problem: I didn’t like it all that much.

  At first, I pushed through. I studied every day, even when I wasn’t in the mood. But after a month, the boredom hit. Not a mild kind of boredom, either — the kind that makes your brain shut down. Each time it happened, I’d give up and drift back to whatever distracted me.

  Until one day, something unexpected happened. The boredom came, like always — but this time, I shut it down. Instantly. I didn’t know how I did it. It just vanished. Gone.

  That moment left me both amazed and frustrated. I had no idea how it worked. I wanted to repeat it, to study it — but instead, I got sick. Cough, runny nose, fever… all I was missing was the fatigue, and I knew that would come next.

  And when the weakness began creeping in — something happened again. Just like the boredom, I felt myself suppress it. But this time, I was ready. I tracked the process step by step.

  What I discovered blew my mind. It seemed that my subconscious mind had moved ahead of the symptom, sensing it before it fully formed. And at the moment of “collision,” there was a tiny gap — a fraction of a second — when I could consciously intervene and take control.

  I decided to test it. Fear was my next subject. I created controlled situations where fear would naturally occur… and again, the same mechanism activated. I could suppress it.

  What began as an accident became a skill — a way to suppress physiological and emotional processes with conscious control.

  Now, I know this might sound impossible to most. But for me, it’s not a theory. It’s something I’ve done. Something I can do.

  And with it, I’ve unlocked a door I didn’t even know existed.