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58 - Chase Away the Memories

  Dazien lay alone in his bed, the Bondweave Ring sitting back in its new place in his [Armory], wondering if he should just give up trying to keep his distance and ask Saiya to hold him again so he could sleep. Part of him was afraid of becoming dependent on her for that. The other part was afraid of his hands roaming while he was half-asleep and making her feel uncomfortable with him. It was hard to remember sometimes when he first began to wake that she wasn’t Uriel keeping him so warm.

  His mind was still racing, though. Unable to stop trying to form a strategy for taking down the enemy that had haunted his partner’s nightmares for years. The DOD was basically camping out inside the Labyrinth since before the blood moon even started. Deep in the heart of it, they somehow managed to convince the Labyrinth’s Keeper that they were its friends and helped to safeguard it by helping to destroy the intruders that got too near its center.

  Dahlia had been difficult to get more information out of, however. She reminded Dazien of the younger orphans when they ate too many sweets, never really sitting still for long and running off on mental tangents with every other sentence. They had only made it halfway back to Uriel’s fortress before she suddenly scampered off in her excitement to go get a place prepared in the Labyrinth for Uriel’s return.

  He and Uriel had told everyone else about the strange encounter, but they were split on what they should do about it, if anything. Rayna and Phoenix both wanted to immediately confront them, but luckily they also both remembered their last couple of encounters with Voidsworn cults, and knew better than to act rashly now.

  Ren and Camilla were both of the opinion on simply avoiding the Labyrinth as it was currently irrelevant to them or the group’s goals. They should be focusing on Phoenix’s quest, not chasing after Uriel’s ghosts. Informing the royals of the threat should be the end of their responsibilities in regard to the DOD.

  Saiya seemed more concerned about everyone else’s mental wellbeing but was staying particularly close to Uriel’s side, trying to hold his gloved hand whenever she could manage it. She was also in agreement with simply informing the authorities and staying clear of the source of Uriel’s traumas but conceded that if Uriel himself wanted to go then she would support that.

  Dazien appreciated that she would honor his partner’s choice. However, Uriel had seemed utterly torn about it. He wanted to confront his enemy, which Dazien was absolutely proud of him for, but at the same time he was afraid of endangering all of them further or letting his trauma get the better of him at a critical moment.

  They needed both a plan and help.

  Instead of coming up with either, though, they decided to sleep on it and regroup the next evening. Camilla agreed to go research more on the Labyrinth itself while they slept, now that she too had access to the Royal Library and was still sleeping during the night.

  Dazien tried taking a slow, deep, and unnecessary breath just to try to calm him further and coax himself to sleep. It was still difficult to clear the noise and worries from his mind. When he breathed in again, that metallic scent of blood assaulted his nose and the pressure at his neck forced his eyes open to find Valtessa’s crimson hair filling his vision again.

  He shoved her away from him as hard as he could, listening to her laughter fill the air as he clutched at the familiar wound on his neck. “My beautiful gem,” she cooed at him, trying to slink closer to him in the bed. “I’m still hungry…”

  Dazien wanted to scream at her to stay away, but he felt the tight leather tied around his mouth and the chains suddenly around his wrists. He felt his panic rise even higher as she grabbed his short hair and forced him to expose his neck to her once more.

  “She’s dead, Dazien,” a sultry masculine voice said, cutting through the sound of his thudding heart. “You don’t have to fear her ever again.”

  When he blinked his eyes again, Valtessa was gone, he was free, and Emrys was perched on the edge of the bed, one leg folded in front of him while the other hung off it. The prince wasn’t laughing at him or moving closer to take that vampire’s place. He simply watched and waited for him to calm down.

  For a brief moment, he was simply relieved that he had insisted on not wearing his Bondweave Ring to bed. There was no way he wanted Phoenix to feel anything that he had just felt and was still trying to regulate. While he had been enjoying the new link between them, along with the confirmation and reassurance it gave him of how she was doing, he didn’t want to make her even more worried about him.

  Dazien sat himself up and looked around to find himself in the same bed but the garish walls of the room he had been repeatedly assaulted in were not boxing him in. Instead it was like the bed was floating atop the sea as it reflected the night sky far above them.

  “This is a dream,” he said more to himself than to Emrys. He met the prince’s pale blue gaze and asked, “You changed it for me?”

  “I didn’t wish to see you suffer any longer,” Emrys quietly said. “I’ll admit I may take the liberty of peeking into dreams uninvited sometimes.” He gave a crooked grin and added as though it were a secret, “My curiosity and drive to gather as much information as possible gets the better of me more often than I care to admit… but I didn’t want to see my newest friend reliving one of his darkest moments. I hope you’re not mad at me for the intrusion.”

  Dazien shook his head as he ran a hand through his hair, trying to brush away the memory of Valtessa’s grip in it as he answered, “I think I owe you my gratitude actually. It was difficult to distinguish that nightmare from the reality of it.”

  After a few more moments of silence as Dazien attempted to regain his composure, he asked, “You said she’s dead now? I thought her trial—”

  “Was finished yesterday. She is dead now, and will never be able to harm you again, my friend,” Emrys answered with finality, setting a comforting hand on his bare knee. He was still only in his sleep shorts while Emrys was wearing little more than golden wire wrapped around his body like filigree, contrasting with the silvery sheen of his skin.

  Dazien looked at that hand, the odd feeling of it being more real than a dream leading him to ask a bit more bluntly than he normally would, “You don’t want to try taking her place, right? I know from past experience that some people will pursue me despite their normal proclivities.”

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  Emrys chuckled. “You inspire people to change their torc colors so that you match them?”

  He huffed a small laugh. “I haven’t seen it here yet, but back in Tulimeir that was basically what would happen sometimes. They usually hated me for it, especially if I tried turning down their advances. Like I should be grateful to them for changing themselves for me.”

  Dazien glanced back up to meet Emrys’ eyes. “Does my Shiny body and voice not tempt you like it did Valtessa?”

  Emrys’ lips twisted into a smirk. “Is that what you would like right now? Someone to chase away the memories of her touch for you?”

  He felt his face heat at the question, but didn’t answer. Dazien hated lying and right now, he wasn’t sure he could say no to that idea and still be honest with either of them.

  The prince’s gaze lingered and the silence stretched into giving away the unspoken truth Dazien wouldn’t voice. Luckily, Emrys removed his hand and instead casually answered the previous question. “I’ve been around Shiny gemites before, so you're not that unusual to me. I’m also a higher Caste than you, so its effects aren’t as strong on me. I’ve learned to simply treat all gemites with the same respect I show others who don the torc. It helps avoid misunderstandings. Besides, you’re not exactly my type.”

  Dazien felt the tension leave his body at the sight of Emrys’ teasing smile and managed a weak smile of his own as he tried to lightly ask, “What is your type exactly, aside from just being a woman?”

  Emrys’ smile turned mischievous as he playfully asked, “If I say redheads, are you going to tell me to stay away from your sister?”

  “I don’t own her. I’ll let her tell you to ‘piss off,’” he retorted, causing the elf to laugh. “But I will defend her decision and help avenge her should you not show her that respect you mentioned.”

  The laughter died off at that subtle threat, but the smile remained as Emrys said, “You sound like your adoptive father now.”

  “What do you mean? You knew him?”

  “I met Paul Wayland before when I was a young boy. Probably around the time you were born, if I had to guess. He was such a shining example of a hero in my mind.” Emrys leaned back against the bed’s headboard as he looked up at the dreamy stars and admitted with a sigh, “I desperately wanted to be just like him.”

  Dazien followed his gaze to the sky, understanding full well that feeling. It was exactly how he felt about Paul after seeing him in his newer Avenger-themed Regalia.

  “It was my own fault, I think… that he got exiled from Serenydi, that is,” Emrys quietly admitted, and they both looked back down at each other. “I didn’t realize it until I was older, but I had accidentally revealed my mother’s desire to wed him. To combine his strength with hers. I poorly worded things in my excitement. He heard me talking about a woman seeking to use and control him when really I just wanted a father who saw me as a person and not a spare of a spare heir.”

  “I can understand that sentiment.”

  “I’m sure yours was different if what I know about your past is accurate.”

  “Yes,” Dazien conceded. Then he pointed out, “At least you had a mother and siblings.”

  “Sometimes I wonder if I would have been better off without…” Emrys said in barely more than a whisper, and Dazien couldn’t help but give him a look that was full of concern. The prince seemed to notice and clarified, “Not that I wished them death; I just grew up with a bit of an inferiority complex instilled in me because of them. I think it’s a different kind of sorrow to not have any family at all compared to having a family that should care but doesn’t.”

  “You seem cared about now,” Dazien noted, remembering how odd it was that the third born child should become heir to the throne.

  Emrys snorted a laugh and corrected, “I became more useful with age, is all. I’m not sure caring plays a factor anymore now than it did twenty years ago.”

  “You’re the crown prince. I’m sure plenty of people care about you.”

  “Caring about my opinion because of my title is like me saying plenty of people care about you because of your Talent,” Emrys said, giving him a pointed look. “I’m not sure that counts as the type of caring I’m sure we both crave. At least you seem to have found some genuine connections through your adoption and that Seneschal of yours.”

  “That’s true,” Dazien admitted. “I’m lucky to have found him. As well as Phoenix and Paul. I’m proud to be able to call them my family.”

  Emrys just quietly observed him for a few more moments before saying with a tone of curiosity, “I witnessed when we rescued you from the Scarlet Banquet that your Seneschal is a lot closer to you than most. Not to mention your touching confession while half-delirious from those tattoos. I can see the way you both look at each other… However, I find myself confused that he would wear the white torc and deny acknowledging the love you share. Is he uncomfortable with being honest in public?”

  Dazien started to shake his head but realized that the statement wasn’t wrong. Uriel had never been comfortable with publicly acknowledging their relationship. It hadn’t normally bothered him before since he knew it was mostly due to Uriel’s own insecurities about his worth, but he couldn’t deny that it felt slightly different here.

  “I believe he wants to wear white and gold instead. He’s just become rather touch-avoidant lately.” He wasn’t sure why he admitted the next part aloud to the prince who had just started to be more of a friend—perhaps he just felt safe enough in this calm dreamscape to admit, “Uriel won’t let me touch him anymore… won’t hold me like he used to.”

  Emrys gave him a look of pity for a brief moment before softly saying, “That sounds extremely lonely. Here in Serenydi, touch is a way to connect with the people around you. To lose that connection yet remain so near must be heartbreaking.”

  Dazien subtly nodded. “It is, but we’re trying to find ways to bridge the gap.”

  The prince tilted his head in thought before holding out a hand, making a different torc materialize, and quietly suggested, “Perhaps wearing this for a while instead might help? I’m sure there are many who would be more than willing to chase away your loneliness and replace those terrible memories of Valtessa’s touch with much more pleasant ones.”

  Dazien considered the torc. It still had blue and purple, along with gold in it to represent his connection to Uriel, but it was entwined with copper, indicating he should seek out a simple casual encounter and the addition of red to imply many people. He raised a questioning brow at the prince, “Why would you suggest red?”

  “There are places on Lover’s Landing where I think you will find relief by just being another face in the crowd, rather than the center of attention. I recommend you visit, explore, and try to forget what was done to you… and the sorrow your current partner offers.”

  Dazien frowned, thinking that sounded almost exactly like how he had tried to escape his grief over Martin’s death. He didn’t want to fall back into that particular habit, but he would admit that Serenydi was very different from Tulimeir. The people he would end up with here would likely be very different in their mentality and expectations of him. Perhaps a visit to the Lover’s Temple would be worth his time, even without changing his torc colors.

  “I’ll consider your advice,” he finally said to the prince. “Thank you for giving it, and for chasing away my nightmare this time.”

  Emrys gave him a warm smile. “It was my pleasure, my friend. Should I leave you to have a pleasant sleep now? If you like, I can give you a past memory with your Seneschal to help ease your heavy heart.”

  Dazien smiled at the thought. “That does sound nice…” Then a different thought struck him, and he remembered to say, “Actually, while I have you here, I have some information for you.”

  “Oh?”

  “The DOD has been hiding in the Labyrinth. Near the center. I was hoping you might be able to help us rout them out. Uriel has been hurt by them in the past, and I know he would like the opportunity to strike back at them. If we can join your guard on an expedition to defeat them, I would owe you a great debt.”

  Emrys’ smile was almost blinding as he said, “I think that is a debt I would be happy to take on, and I already know exactly how you can repay it.”

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