Ansel Mackenzie paused in front of the apartment door, before turning his head to stare down the hallway. The dizzying number of identical wooden rectangles separated by pin white wall gave him a deep unease. This was the pce, right? He checked his phone. Floor 7, Unit 113. He looked up at the door in front of them, the numbers 113 practically gring at him as they rested above the peephole.

  Okay, this was the pce. He should probably knock.

  Just raise his fist and tap on the door.

  Ansel sighed in a vain attempt to calm his racing heart. He could just go home. He should just go home, actually. There was nothing stopping him from just turning around and hightailing it before anybody noticed he was there.

  Nothing except for guilt.

  ***

  Jess looked at him through the computer screen, the grey Vancouver light somehow making her red hair even more vibrant.

  “Ans, you should go to this.” She said.Ansel clicked his tongue, checking the Facebook event page for the gathering again. “It’s on tonight, which is really short notice, and Lisa…”

  “You’re her brother, not her father, and your Aunt is there to take care of her tonight.” Jess replied firmly. “Come on, you can’t hide away in your house forever.”

  “Yeah, well, I should be using this time to study.” “Ans, please.” Jess’s voice was practically begging now. “You need this.”

  Ansel scoffed. “That’s debatable. I’m fine.”

  “Honey.” Jess peered at him through his ptop’s monitor. She was giving him the look, the one she gave him before she said something unpleasant. “You have no friends, and the only time you leave the house is to run errands or go to the gym.”

  “That’s not true. I have you.” Ansel said, although he knew that she was right. “Your only friend being your Ex-ssh-bestie on the other side of the pnet is NOT healthy, and you know it.” Jess said firmly. Ansel pouted at her, but held his tongue. He did know it, but he wasn’t ready to admit it just yet.

  “Look, the st two years have been rough for both of us, you moreso.” Jess said slowly, as if she was stepping on eggshells. “But you’re never going to heal and move forward unless you take these steps. Do you really want to live with your asshole father in that shithole town for the rest of your life?”A hint of annoyance, threatening to bubble to anger, hit Ansel. “Look, I appreciate your concern, but you are the st person that should be lecturing me on how to deal with grief.” He snapped, regret setting in before the words finished leaving his mouth.

  Jess flinched, rubbing her wrists over her long sleeved shirt.

  “I’m sorry, that came out… I’m sorry.” Ansel said pathetically.

  “I just want you to be happy, and right now… You’re not.” Jess said quietly. “Look, do what you want. I’m going to go get some air. Love you.”

  The call ended before Ansel could reply.

  ***

  The events of earlier that day reverberated in his head like a drum. As much as he hated to admit it, his ex-girlfriend was right.

  His life had downright exploded twice in the past eighteen months. Three times, counting the breakup. It had been, and still was, a lot to deal with. But he knew that if he didn’t start picking up the pieces and getting back out there, he was just going to spiral further and further into depression.

  It was either this, or therapy. There weren’t any decent therapists in his sleepy little hometown of Stanthorpe. There wasn’t much of anything.

  Which led him to here. He lifted his hand timidly, trying to find the strength to take the plunge.

  Turns out that was unnecessary. The door swung open on its own accord, revealing a short woman sporting a dark green mini dress and a blonde pixie cut. She hesitated for a moment, eyeing Ansel from head to toe, before crossing her arms and leaning against the doorframe.

  “You’ve been standing out here like a stunned deer for the past five minutes. I was wondering if you were ever going to knock.”

  “Oh, uh, sorry.” Ansel stammered, taken aback at just how good this woman looked in that dress. “I wasn’t sure this was the right pce.”

  Smooth. Very smooth. What, was he fourteen again? Jesus.

  The woman bit her lip. “It is the right pce. Ansel, right? We’ve talked in the group chat a little.”

  That was probably true, but Ansel couldn’t pce her face.

  He’d joined his University’s ‘nerd club’ a few months ago, after he had found it advertised on the uni’s Facebook page. It felt like a good group of people, over two dozen strong and sharing all of his nerdy interests. Plus, the gender split was near fifty-fifty, which was not something he could say for the other nerd groups he had scouted out.

  But, living three hours outside of the city and raising his younger sister wasn’t great for his social life. Ansel hadn’t yet met anyone in the flesh, which meant that he had no idea who this woman was. She was blonde, so probably Abigail?

  “I’m Chloe.” Chloe, who was apparently a mind reader, said with an unimpressed tone.

  Wait, Chloe was the one hosting the gathering. This was her apartment, and Ansel was an idiot.

  He chuckled nervously. He could save this. “Sorry. I’m not great with faces I’ve never seen before.”

  That got a giggle out of her, at least. “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you.” She said, giving Ansel a once over with her eyes again.

  “It’s nice to finally meet you too.” Ansel smiled as he held out a hand.

  “A handshake? Really? Come on, we’re friends, right?” She held out her arms, offering a hug.

  Ansel hesitantly accepted, letting her wrap her arms around him. The hug was warm and soft, and really fucking awkward. He was not used to hugging people he didn’t know. Or anybody that wasn’t his sister, honestly, and it did not seem to appeal to him.

  Finally, after an eternity, Chloe broke her hold and grabbed his hand. Ansel halfheartedly tried to tug it away, but her grip was solid and didn’t seem to understand his distaste for contact. “Come in, let me introduce you.”

  “That’s really not…” But she was already leading him into the spacious and modern open pn apartment.

  “I’m so gd you could make it.” She said brightly as they walked. Well, as she walked and dragged Ansel along behind her. “I wasn’t expecting many people here tonight because I just threw the event up today, but when you said you were attending in the chat I was really hoping to meet you.”

  “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you all as well…” Ansel started, his voice trailing off as he took in his surroundings. Wow, this pce was posh. How the hell did Chloe afford this? The entire space was one rge room, with a kitchen at one end and a lounge area at the other, a small archway just off of the lounge leading deeper. The entire wall running the length of the room was gss, looking out onto a rge balcony that was currently holding a handful of people, all standing around and mingling while sipping various drinks and looking at the city in the distance.

  “Good lord, this pce is nice.” Ansel said as she led him over to the lounge section, which was currently hosting another small group of people, all sitting in front of a giant television set.

  “Thanks! It’s my parent’s pce.” Ah, that made sense. “Look everyone, Ansel’s here!”

  The group shifted from their seats to face Ansel, which made him really wish he was wearing a hoodie over his jeans and button down so he could hide from their gaze.

  “Okay okay okay,” Chloe said excitedly, thankfully while she released Ansel’s hand. “Let me introduce you. This-” She pointed to a short man with blonde hair and a goatee sitting on a rge leather couch. “-Is William. His girlfriend-” Her finger moved over to the mousey brown haired girl that was nuzzled up next to him. “-Georgia, and his sister.-” Her finger once again darted to point at a tall yet lithe woman with long blonde hair sitting on the floor.”-Abigail.”

  Ah yes, these three. Ansel knew them. They were the de-facto ‘leaders’ of this little club, alongside Chloe. Well, leaders was a strong term, but they organised the events and moderated the group chats.

  “Thank you for making us both an accessory to my brother, babe.” Abigail snorted, her rolling eyes coming to rest on Ansel.

  “No problem, babe.” Chloe shot back. Abigail’s eyes sailed away from Ansel and paused on Chloe, before darting to the bnk TV screen, a tinge of red appearing on her cheeks as they did.

  “Now this is Georgia’s brother, Ian-” She pointed to a small, mousey haired man sitting a the foot of the couch. He smiled up at Ansel before resuming leaning against an absolute unit of a man next to him, muscles bulging and head bald. The guy could probably bench double what Ansel could, and Ansel was far from a lightweight. “-and his bestie, Ben.” Chloe finished, pointing to the giant.

  Ben snapped his hands and threw some finger guns at Ansel. “Bro.” He said, in clear appreciation of Ansel’s biceps.

  Ansel nodded in reply, instinctively fanning out his tight button down shirt, in the hopes that it would make his own gym addiction less apparent. He also decided that he didn’t like Ben all that much.

  “Welcome, Ansel.” William smiled. “We were just about to get a game of Mario Kart going, if Abbi can figure out how the TV works.”

  “Seriously?” Chloe giggled. “It’s not rocket science.”

  “Do I look like a forty year old AV dad to you?” Abigail snapped back. “I’ve tried every input, how the fuck does this thing work?”

  “You’re a drummer with an engineering degree. Isn’t this, like, literally your specialty?” Chloe sighed as she stepped over to help. “You need to set this switch to output 4, this one to input 5, that one to fish- yes, the little fish icon- and then set the amp to speaker set B, input Pystation. I know we’re pying on the Wii, but set it to Pystation.” She started to jab at the dizzying array of buttons below the TV.

  Abigail threw her hands up and cast her gre around the room, silently decring that this was the stupidest AV setup ever made while daring people to disagree with her. Ansel wasn’t about to.

  “Jeez, that’s confusing even by my standards.” He said the words just as he realised that they may be insulting to the host. He gulped a little.

  “See? The hot new guy gets it!” Abigail excimed sarcastically, giving Ansel her own pair of finger guns. Was this group some sort of finger gun cult?

  “Okay, maybe it seems a little convoluted, but theres a method-” The TV flickered to life, showing the Wii main menu. “-to the madness!” Chloe smiled as she sat down on the other end of the couch. She made eye contact with Ansel and patted the spot next to her. He nervously walked over and sat down.

  “Chloe, it’s 2013.” Abigail sighed, handing a controller to Ansel. “Get one of those programmable universal remotes. We have the technology.”

  “Yeah but then how will I confuse the blonde bimbos that think they know better than I do?” Chloe smirked.

  “You’re a blonder bimbo than I am.” Abigail muttered, turning her attention back to the TV.

  “Will you all just pick a character already?” Georgia sighed. “They always do this…”

  Ansel immediately tapped his controller and selected the objectively best character in the entire Mario franchise, Rosalia. Abigail must have wanted to use her as well, because she turned and gave Ansel a look that he couldn’t decipher. Didn’t she know that multiple people can select the same character?

  Four of them, Ansel, William, Chloe and Abigail, eventually managed to get into a race, with promises to rotate the losers out with the others. Ansel quickly learned that being better than his twelve year old sister was an awful benchmark against actual adults. He was in st pce by the end of the first corner. Apparently you could boost off of the start if you timed it right.

  Last pce did have its advantages though, namely it let Ansel send a lot of blue shells. Most of those were aimed at Abigail, who was competing with William for first pce.

  “Thanks, cutie!” As Chloe capitalised on a particurly nasty blue shell shot, which somehow hit Abigail and sent William careening into the grass. Chloe flew past them both, taking first pce and winning the race.

  “Yessss!” She excimed, leaning into Ansel. He felt a surge of discomfort at this strange new person touching him, but he didn’t want to be rude and move away.

  “Jeez, that blue shell jump scared me. That was embarrassing.” William said sheepishly, as Georgia giggled at him.

  “Ding Dong!” Ansel didn’t remember seeing a doorbell on the front door, but it was ringing.

  “I’ll get it!” Georgia leapt up from the couch and danced off.

  “Did you want a drink?” Chloe whispered to Ansel, leaning into him just a little bit further. He felt his entire body stiffen.

  “No thanks. I gotta drive home tonight, so I can’t drink.”

  “You live way out in the boonies, right? Like, three hours drive?” Ansel nodded, before Chloe continued, a smirk forming on her face. “I can put you up for the night. We’ve got plenty of space, and you won’t be driving across the mountains in the dark.”

  “Oh, uh.” Ansel rubbed the back of his head, his fingers fiddling with his short ponytail. “I appreciate the offer, but I need to be home tonight. My Aunt is watching my sister, but she needs to leave very early tomorrow.”

  “Oh.” Chloe didn’t try to hide the dejection in her tone. “Yeah, fair enough.” She leant away from him, breaking contact. Ansel tried not to show his relief.

  “Hey everyone!” Georgia reappeared in Ansel’s vision. “Look who’s here!”

  Ansel gnced over at the person standing beside Georgia. For a moment, Ansel couldn’t tell if he was looking at a man or a woman, which made him feel uncomfortable in a strange way. At least the discomfort was overshadowed by the guilt he felt for being uncomfortable.

  They were short— at least seven inches shorter than Ansel, who was right on six feet tall— and had brown skin and curly bck hair that just reached their colr. They were wearing jeans and a white turtleneck, their big brown eyes bloodshot and tear- wait, had they been crying?

  “Jason!” Abigail excimed, smiling at him. Her smile immediately disappeared the moment she saw Jason’s eyes, though, a small gasp escaping her mouth once she did. “Oh my god, what’s wrong?”

  “I uh, well- oof!” Jason Collins practically fell on his ass as Abigail leapt at him and pulled him into a hug. Thankfully Ansel also knew his pronouns now that he could put a name to the face.

  “Kate and I broke up.” Jason finished once he had recovered from the blonde’s rugby style tackle hug.

  There were more than a few gasps from the seven of them. It was certainly unexpected, Jason and Kate had been a sort of ‘power couple’ within the club, as far as Ansel had been able to tell during his limited time interacting with everyone online. They had been together since at least high school— which they had graduated from two years ago— and had practically done everything together. Heck, all the photos of them from all of the club’s events featured them side by side, as if they were literally sewn together in some weird experiment. A lot of people saw them as unbreakable soulmates.

  Frankly, Ansel saw them as codependent. But that seemed to be a moot point now.

  “Oh my god, that’s horrible!” Abigail said loudly while still clutching him as if he was an upset puppy. “You need to tell us everything that happened!”

  “I’d… Rather not?” Jason replied quietly. His voice was hoarse, and he winced and pulled away from Abigail’s embrace the moment she tried to lean down to nuzzle into his neck.

  “Oh, I’m sorry.” Abigail said sheepishly, averting her eyes.

  “It’s okay.” Jason smiled softly. Wow, they actually had a cute smile. The kind that would brighten the room, under different circumstances. “I’m gonna go use the bathroom.”

  He left quickly, apparently already knowing where the bathroom was.

  The moment he disappeared around the corner of the hallway, the whispers started from the group.

  “What do you think happened?” Georgia muttered.

  “They were so good together!” William stated.

  “Do you think Kate cheated on him?” Abigail sighed. That was a weird thing for her to say, as she was supposed to be close friends with Kate.

  “Wouldn’t surprise me, the guy’s pretty low testosterone.” Ian, of all people, said. That actually drew an distasteful gre and an unfriendly nudge from the behemoth next to him. Ansel decided that he did like Ben, after all.

  “Maybe he’s the one that cheated.” Georgia shrugged, also raising an eyebrow at Ian’s remark.

  “It doesn’t matter. I call dibs.” Abigail was smirking as she said the words, crossing her arms as if she had just won a major debate.

  The room went silent, everyone casting their eyes over to Abigail.

  “You can’t call dibs.” Chloe deadpanned in reply.

  “What? He’s an adorable little musician. Exactly my type.” Abigail shrugged nonchantly. “And now he’s avaible.”

  “Still, you can’t call dibs.” Chloe was wearing a smirk now, as well. “You raise a good point though. Maybe I’m also in the market for a guitar pying twink.”

  “Hey! That’s not fair! Respect the dib-”

  “Maybe don’t try to jump on the guy that’s very clearly heartbroken?” Ansel felt himself saying. The thought of these two girls treating Jason like a commodity really pissed him off. “Jason is a person. You both sound like men fighting over a woman.”

  The rest of the group erupted into ughter, and Ansel noticed William gnce at Abigail, who was gring at Ansel with what could only be described as pure rage on her face.

  “I am not a man!” She practically shouted.

  “Could have fooled me.” Ansel shot back in return.

  “Oooooooooh!” William ughed. “Face it sis, you had that one coming.”

  Abigail looked like her head was about to catch fire. Her eyes were literally twitching. Serves her right.

  Chloe looked at Ansel sheepishly. “You’re right, sorry. No matter, I prefer my men more masculine.” She giggled as she leaned into him again, making his entire body stiffen in horror. Oh fucking hell, why did she keep trying to touch him?

  Ansel leapt to his feet at the touch. “I’m gonna go get some air.” He said quickly, making his way towards the sliding gss door leading to the balcony. He tried to ignore Chloe’s pout as he walked outside.

  Damn, that was a view. The balcony overlooked the city, the skyline of Brisbane’s heart twinkling in the distance. Ansel stood there for a moment, drinking in the cool night breeze and beauty of the city before him, before walking up to the railing and opening the camera app on his phone.

  Oh to have one of his real cameras on hand. No matter, a good photographer made do. He positioned his phone, doing his best to compose the image on the small screen. Put the Story Bridge on that third of the image, and that should line up the taller skyscrapers on the other third. Okay good, now set the self timer because this is a going to be a long exposure and pressing the shutter will shake it too much. This wasn’t a bad sci-fi movie, so make sure the horizon is level, then tap the button.

  3…2…1… Ansel checked the photo. It wasn’t great, it was never going to be with a crappy handheld phone camera, but it was good enough to show Jess.

  [21:37] Ansel: Hey guess where I am.

  [21:37] Ansel sent an image

  [21:38] Jessica Tierney: Oh wow, that’s pretty.

  [21:38] Jessica Tierney: I wish Rose could see that.

  Ansel’s heart clenched. No, don’t think about her. It’ll ruin the mood.

  Thankfully his phone chimed again before his mind could start to wander.

  [21:39] Jessica Tierney: Also! Are you at the party? I am SO PROUD of you! How’s it going?

  Sheesh, proud of him? Was Jess his ex, or his mum?

  Fuck. He was actually that dysfunctional, wasn’t he?

  [21:40] Ansel: It’s going okay. I think I’ve only gravely insulted two people so far!

  [21:41] Jessica Tierney: Well, that’s not too bad for you. How many people have flirted with you?

  [21:42] Ansel: Two.

  [21:42] Jessica Tierney: Oh my god… -.-

  [21:42] Jessica Tierney: Can you go five minutes without pissing people that are interested in you off?

  [21:43] Ansel: Babe, you know better than anyone that I can’t.

  “Hey.”

  Ansel turned his attention away from the phone and towards the little curly haired person that had snuck up beside him. “Hey, Jason.”

  “It’s a pretty view, isn’t it?” Jason said, peering out towards the city.

  “Yeah, it is. I live out in the country, so it’s a new view for me.”

  “I’ve never left the city before, so that would be a new view for me.” Jason smiled, his eyes gncing down for just a moment.

  “Seriously? Never?” Ansel had a hard time believing that. What, had he never taken a day trip, even as a child?

  “Nope. Never.” Jason shrugged, not turning his attention away from the distant lights. “Thank you.”

  “Thank me?”

  “For sticking up for me earlier.”

  Ansel’s ears caught fire. “You heard that?” He stammered.

  Jason just smiled sadly and nodded. “After… This past week… I don’t even want to think about dating. I love those girls as friends, but the way they were going on was weirding me out. So thanks for stopping it.”

  “Hey, anytime. I just got out of a retionship myself, so I get it.” Ansel smiled at him, before his mouth started running before his brain.“Us men gotta stick together, right?”

  The words felt bitter and awful and just pin wrong as they left his mouth. That was a stupid fucking joke, but it felt even worse than that. Apparently Jason felt the same, because Ansel saw the him flinch ever so slightly as he heard the M word. It was nearly imperceptible, but it was there.

  Ansel knew what that flinch could mean. Was Jason….? No, the odds of that were miniscule. He just cringed because Ansel had said something really stupid. Don’t overanalyse it. Stop thinking about her.

  “Sorry, that sounded less awful in my head.” Ansel followed up, hoping to recover some lost ground.

  Jason giggled quietly before turning to look at him, their eyes locking. This boy was pretty. Unfairly pretty, in a way that made Ansel deeply uncomfortable. No wonder Chloe and Abigail wanted him, if Ansel looked half as good as Jason did, then-

  “You have really pretty eyes.” Jason said. His doe brown eyes somehow growing even wider as his hand cmped over his own mouth.

  “You too? Why is everyone flirting with me tonight?” Ansel ughed. He didn’t know if he was ughing out of frustration or humour, but he was ughing.

  “It’s because you’re hot.” Chloe’s voice from behind him made him jump slightly. She sauntered up to him, pcing a hand on his chest. “And fucking solid, holy shit. Do you ever leave the gym?”

  “It’s a hobby.” Ansel would back up further if it didn’t mean plunging himself off of the building. He was tempted to try anyway.

  “Sorry.” Jason said, backing away himself. Was he trembling? “I-I’m gonna go get a drink.”

  Then he ran off, leaving Ansel and Chloe alone.

  “Look at you, turning the straight boys gay.” Chloe said, taking Jason’s freshly vacated spot as she casually erased the concept of bisexuality.

  “Well, my ex is a lesbian, so I apparently turn the gay girls straight as well.” That was another terrible and really homophobic joke. What the fuck was wrong with Ansel tonight?

  Chloe, for some reason, found it funny.

  “Were you pnning on going to the park meetup on Sunday?” She said once her ughter subsided.

  “I wasn’t pnning on it?” Ansel truly hadn’t been. He didn’t want to leave his sister twice in the same week. “Why?”

  “Because I like you, and I liked chatting with you in the group chat, but you’re wound up so tight tonight from social anxiety.” Chloe’s voice was gentle now, and she’d backed off slightly. “So, the meet. It’s gonna be at the park. I was thinking that if we’re both there we can split from the group and hang out together.”

  Holy shit. This girl was asking him out.

  Did he want that? Chloe was objectively good looking, and yeah they did get along well online. Sure, he wasn’t attracted to her, at least not yet, but that was normal for him. He hadn’t been attracted to Jess either, before he got to actually know her. It might be the same case here.

  “Okay. We can do that.” Might as well try, right?

  “Yay!” Chloe cpped her hands together rapidly while jumping up and down. Ansel tried to convince himself that it was cute. “It’s a date then!”

  He forced a smile. “It’s a date.”

  Chloe’s grin got even wider. “You sure you don’t want to stay the nigh-”

  “You know, it’s getting te, and I have a long drive.” Ansel blurted, already taking a step away from the railing, while resisting the urge to take the fast route down. “I should really get going.”

  “But you just got here?” Chloe said, her voice baffled but her body moving out of Ansel’s way.

  “Tell the others it was great to meet them, I’ll see you the day after tomorrow!” Ansel practically sprinted back inside, making his way over to the front door.

  He didn’t stop as he strode across the expanse of the open pn apartment, not even when he caught a gnce of Jason gulping down a beer, shaking like a leaf with fresh tears on his face. Had the breakup been that bad? Poor guy.

  Their eyes locked as he opened the front door, and Ansel gave him a stoic wave as it shut behind him, releasing him from horrors of social interaction.

  He slumped against the wall, panting loudly as his racing heart slowly started to calm itself.

  Part of him hated himself for bailing after twenty minutes, but he decided to be proud that he’d done it to begin with. Baby steps.

  Besides, he could try again Sunday, apparently.

  Amelia_Johnson