I didn’t scream. I didn’t throw anything. I did, however, call Brian a “spineless, empty-headed bootlicker,” which I’ll admit—might’ve crossed a line. Either that or throwing his cactus on the wall.

  But after almost two years of doing everyone’s job but my own, after covering for vacations, sick days, and Karen’s endless coffee breaks, they give the manager role to him while I o ly get a “Thank you, Alice”? Whaaaat?

  Honestly, who cares? I packed my things quickly, which wasn't hard as 'my things' were a few pens, a notepad and a coffee mug, and stormed off. Their loss, really! Now I'll have more time to grind my levels on my favorite MMO, and I'll find a new job that pays even better! And recognizes how they needed me instead of some idiot that comes every day with a different tie color!

  As I left the building, I took a look back at our office's floor as I walked away. There was that asshole, Brian, staring at me through the glass panel. Would he hear if I shouted at him from here? As I wondered that, I noticed the look on his face change, as if he was worried. Was he pitying me, really? I stuck out my middle finger to him, flipping him off as he tried to say something, pointing at the streets next to me. Was he mocking me about how I was thrown out to the streets?

  I took my hands close to my mouth to shout, not even caring if he would actually hear me, but before the first profanity could leave my lips, I heard a loud horn, and before I could react, my body was violently thrown far away as a vehicle hit me in high velocity. Ah, that was what he was trying to tell me. Damn it. I felt myself flying through the air, then, I assume, hitting a parked car, as the sound of glass breaking and an alarm firing off was the last thing I could hear before I lost consciousness.

  Then, I woke up, as if from a way too long nap. I expected more pain and broken bones, the hospital probably gave me the good stuff, as I could barely feel my body.

  That's when I realized—I can't feel my body.

  Surprised, I tried moving my hands to my torso, trying to feel any bandages, or wounds, or a hospital gown, but I didn't feel anything—not even my arms moving. Startled, I opened my eyes immediately, but what I saw was not a hospital room.

  Rough stone walls covered the crampled room I was in, like some sort of cave. I looked down, having prepared myself to see the terrible condition that I were in, but where my body should be was now a silhouette of white light, vaguely human-shaped but lacking details like fingers, toes or clothes. Just a glowing mannequin body, floating a few inches off the ground.

  I got fired, I got hit by a car, and now I was... dead? And if I did became a ghost, what was this claustrophobic place? Did my family not bother buying a coffin and I was rotting in some random cave now?

  Before I could properly panic, a faint chiming noise started in front of me, like something out of a fantasy game when you press a button in the main menu.

  A voice greeted me—or maybe an image flashed in my eyes? It was hard to say, it was as if the information was sent directly to my brain. Maybe this was actually only a dream, after all. I'd stop worrying about my current state as I accepted this theory, but I'd heard about people dreaming while in a coma before, so my well being was not confirmed. Anyhow, enter my name? If this place is a dream, you should know that my name is Alice already…

  Dungeon Lord..? Maybe I’ve been gaming too much in my free time… It’s better than having to dream about that stupid workplace, though.

  Are these my stats? They seem kinda… Underwhelming… That’s like, totally false! I know I’ve been a bit out of shape ever since that bakery next street opened, but don’t undermine my intelligence too! And 09 charisma? Excuse me? Increase these two properly, damn it!

  This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

  It followed my orders... Damn it, I should've thought about this a little before spending my points... Not like this matters, unless I end up spending a long time in this supposed coma... Ugh, let's upgrade my Constitution too, maybe my real body will get healthier... Maybe I could do a magic build to compensate for the lack of Strength?

  No lore introduction or anything? Can I at least customize who I am first? I'm not the insecure kind, but I don't exactly fit the Dungeon Lord aesthetic. Well, if Dungeon Lord is supposed to be my class, this is like a specialization? I should learn more about each option before choosing this time. Let's start with Death.

  Pretty standard necromancer stuff, it seems. The structure rating is so low, though... A catacomb in ruins is probably not the most ventilated place, I'm not sure if I want to stay inside something like this with a horde of rotting corpses... Let's see the next option.

  A nature themed dungeon? Sounds more inviting than a dark crypt, honestly. Probably smells better, too. Might be a bit of a nuisance though, now that I'm thinking about the insects... These stats make it seem like I'd need to engage in physical combat, too. I'll think about this one later, let's go now to the Path of Arcanum.

  A whooping +4 to intelligence?! That sounds nice, it would teach these jerks back at the office... I bet none of them even have a intelligence score above 10 anyway. Well, with the rating of 8, I feel like I'd be a pretty powerful mage, sorcerer or something. But it might be bothersome too, having most of my dungeon's power concentrated on me. Plus I've just got fired and almost died, I'm not sure if I'm in the mood to learn magic for now... Next!

  A dexterity increase? I guess you need good hands to work with mechanical things. I complained about the concentration of power on the Lord in the path before this one, but a 01 seems so small..? I get that I'd fix my weakness with my creations, but I'm supposed to be the dungeon lord, I'm not sure if I want to be that weak. Being some sort of awesome inventor could be nice, though, having robots do the dirty work for me... I could have a fully automated dungeon, maybe. Well, let's see the last one.

  Alright, sounds like some Conan the Barbarian thing. Punch-first, ask later, or maybe don't even bother asking. Leading armies sounds cool, sure—but I just got done dealing with office politics. Do I really want to manage a warband of goblins, orcs or whatever? Although, I'd be happy to prove people wrong; Think I'm not fit to a managerial role? Watch me rule over a whole army, losers!

  Jeez, don't rush me, weird mental HUD. Let's see, I have five options... Zombies, flowers and furry creatures, wizardry, murder robots or regular murder guys... I mentally concentrated on the blue screen inside my brain, unsure of my decision. If I mess this up, I might be in a lot of trouble until I wake up, so I should pick wisely... How do I want this world to know me by as a Dungeon Lord?