“I just sent a message to Queen Elonia. I hope she likes my gift.”

  Eric scowled. “You just gave her Queensland. You’re trying to impress her.”

  Richard flashed a shameless smile. “Wouldn’t you want to impress the most beautiful girl in the entire world?”

  “Not if she’s my sister!”

  Richard gave him a look. “Well she certainly isn’t mine.”

  Eric closed his eyes and groaned, not expecting the pat on his shoulder.

  “Relax, kung fu brother. Things are going to work out beautifully. For all of us! I can just feel it in the air. Can’t you?”

  Eric caught sight of dozens of widened eyes, looks of speechless awe, and jealousy from the hundreds of disciples.

  “Look at how Master honors him! Calling him brother!”

  “What did he do to earn such privilege?”

  “Who does he think he is?”

  “He’s steeling our master away from us! He’s a conniver. He must be!”

  Eric held back a wince at the murmurs that belonged in every xianxia novel ever.

  “I’m hungry. When do we eat?”

  “Master said we would soon be ready for the delves! I want to fight!”

  He even noted the well-behaved orcs, not a one looking at him like they wanted to torture or eat him. Rather, they all looked a bit famished.

  “Did you actually manage to awaken nodes in classless orcs?”

  Richard gave a casual nod. “Yup. It wasn’t that hard. You just have to rekindle the fires of their ancestral potential.”

  Eric gave the youth a surprised look. “Seriously? You can activate nodes in people without any nodes whatsoever? Do you have any idea how powerful that is?” He shook his head. “You’re PC-protag vibes are off the fucking charts.”

  “Only if they have the potential for nodes!” Richard clarified. “And if they swear themselves as a disciple of my academy, of course. Now come on! Just let me rekindle the boundary wards, so no unexpected guests will disturb my disciples, and we can go.

  Eric blinked. “You can protect your own territories with a boundary ward?”

  Richard grinned. “You better believe I can!” Then he sighed. “But I’ve achieved Bronze, so it no longer protects me personally. It wouldn’t be balanced otherwise, and Terra thinks I have plenty of room to grow.”

  Eric opened his mouth, then snapped it shut at the bemused looks that Alice and Morlekai were giving him as they gently placed their exhausted-looking level zero in the back seat.

  “Looks like Boyscout isn’t the only one embracing the absolute absurd,” Alice snorted, before flashing Eric a cheeky grin. “Finally getting a taste of your own medicine?”

  Morlekai said nothing, but his twinkling eyes and bemused smile made it clear that he too was enjoying seeing Eric get put in his place.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Eric huffed, then spent long moments staring at the levi controls.

  “What’s wrong, Eric?” Richard asked, looking the picture of concerned innocence.

  Eric didn’t believe it for a second.

  “Yeah, um… I can’t actually…” He turned to Alice and Morlekai. “Can you guys drive this thing?”

  “It’s alright. I actually have a knack for this,” Richard said with a smile, giving Eric a consoling clap on his shoulder. “Scoot over. “I’ll handle it.”

  Richard turned to Weifeng the moment he was seated and Eric found himself riding shotgun. “Have our disciples train as always, Weifeng! The food pills should last for another six months, but if all goes well, we’ll have new disciples and fresh produce and several hundred cows for my most loyal maiden warriors to care for within the week... as well as a feast that our orcish brothers won’t soon forget!”

  These words earned cheers from his disciples, most especially the Milk Maids squealing over cattle to tend to, and the orcs, squealing at the thought of filling their bellies, who all snapped to attention as Richard gave a casual wave and headed out, driving the levi far more smoothly than Jack ever had.

  Eric blinked in dismay. “Alright, how the fuck is it that this cat is now the one playing chauffeur, and punching my shoulder while regaling me with his adventures like I’m his little fucking brother? What just happened?”

  “Humbling, isn’t it?” Morlekai silently commiserated, though his smirk as he gently adjusted their sleeping companions made it clear he wasn’t commiserating at all. He was enjoying it!

  Alice flashed Eric a sangfroid grin. “Clearly his storybook destiny is even more outrageous than yours, Boyscout!”

  “… So there I was, faced with two hundred orc musketeers when it suddenly dawned on my how ridiculous this conflict between us all was, how much stronger we could be if we all worked together, so I coaxed a cease-fire between the orcs and the elves enticing enough that even our wonderful Milk Maids left their tree fortress when I told them that I could aid them in opening their meridians and achieving enlightenment!”

  Eric forced a smile. “That sounds fascinating.”

  “I know, right? We had some hairy scrapes and plenty of misunderstandings, but after exactly one hundred sparring matches where I showed absolute mastery by not permanently maiming or killing a single opponent, they were all eager to become disciples of my school!”

  “Wait, let me get this straight,” a now awake and frowning Yuki said from the back. “You got six freekin’ territories under your banner and you didn’t have to kill a single orc or faerie or whatever else there was? You got all those levels from meditating and completing quests?”

  “Well, I did have to clear a handful of spirit beasts attacking the lost elven faction still in Queensland after having been abandoned by the Sylvan Alliance, but once I took care of them, my elven disciples have become some of my most stalwart supporters!”

  Eric rubbed his eyes. “What the hell are you talking about? Queensland was never abandoned!”

  “It was according to my quest log,” Richard assured. “But what was so awesome about it is that I got a Bloodless Conquest title! And a Races United title! Do you have any idea how sweet that is?”

  Eric sighed. “I’m betting it’s a pretty fucking sweet bonus.”

  The boy laughed, a golden shaft of sunlight highlighting his playful features, and Eric found himself laughing right along with him. The whole levimobile was soon cracking jokes and just savoring the halcyon joy of racing across forest and fields filling Eric with such a dreamlike wonder that tears were forming in the corners of his eyes.

  He’d missed this. Joking with friends old and new.

  Savoring just how sweet life could be. Even if he normally didn’t feel like he had just stepped out of the grandest sports academy in Tokyo and was about to enjoy an awesome afternoon shopping with friends before coming home to his distracted but well-meaning parents, already planning tomorrow’s adventures in his mind.

  Sure, he knew it was slice-of-life fantasy bullshit.

  But who said it had to be that far from the truth? Their levimobile was as sleek as any sleek, anime drifter. Freetown had tech wonders to rival Tokyo, and New Arcadia was both the perfect isekai and European city, all rolled into one. Best of all, they really were attending an academy, or at least would be, very soon. The ultimate magic, and for all Eric knew, as soon as Richard Li here joined, the academy would be graced by Sagacious elders teaching any and all cultivators how to infuse planes of reality into enhancing their Qi attacks with Primal Spiritual Energy which would make Eric such an awesome ascending phoenix. Besides, boosting Qi attacks was so freekin’ anime awesome that he didn’t mind his new friend, and Eric’s Social perception made it pretty clear that Richard Li really DID see himself as their friend, the only reason why all their defenses were down. And Richard was now gently wrapping them up in the gentle cloak of slice-of-life anime awesome that they all secretly craved to be a part of.

  If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

  Eric sighed, chuckling softly, pretty sure that their young newly ascended cultivating school captain athlete was making full use of 30+ Charisma and PC Protag vibes that might just rival Eric’s own to shape the world, and his newest companions, into a version of reality as sweet and filled with hope as any could be. And he probably didn’t have a clue as to what he was doing.

  And that was okay, Eric decided.

  The whole point of joining the academy was to take a break from the slaughterfest. A temporary armistice between him and all the major bloodthirsty powers, and savor some slice-of-life moments.

  He was fucking tired of playing grim dark anyway.

  But as much as Eric admired his new friend, talking so animatedly to Jack and Morlekai, already earning a warmth in Yuki’s captivated stare that Eric knew he was falling so fucking flat trying to hit that it was time to let past what-ifs go…

  Eric still had concerns.

  The boy was almost protected by his innocent idealism. By being forged in a story so gentle, a training area that would have done both Chibli and FF proud, meant that Richard wasn’t quite prepared for the genre most of the world knew to expect.

  At last not yet.

  But he would be. And it was Eric’s totally voluntary job as his good-natured, low key but streetwise friend, to keep golden boy safe.

  “Hey Rich, I need you to do me a favor,” Eric said with that jaded smile that he knew would gain a surprised look and a natural nod from the future school golden boy. And how odd and oddly natural it was for Richard Li to gaze at Eric as if he were exactly that type of former gang-centric classmate gone good that had always been Eric’s favorite flavor of sidekick in all the best manga.

  “Yeah, Eric, what’s up?”

  “You see that glittering tetrahedron of obsidian glass and chrome just across the fields to our right? I need you to head to it like we’re not eagerly making a break out of Ashland for Freetown as fast as we damn well can.”

  Rich snorted at that but nodded. “Sure, buddy.” His eyes widened as the pyramid-like structure with the perfectly flat paneled sides came into view. “Oh hey, I sense something about it. It’s radiates with magic… but not just that, it echoes with fate as well!”

  Eric dipped his head.

  Alice’s eyes had also widened. “Boyscout! Is that I think it is?”

  Eric smirked. “If you think it’s a T-II Ascension Center with a dozen pods that will access any and all classes available, at least up to Master-Tier, which is actually a pretty sweet freekin’ tier, then yes. It is.”

  Morlekai’s eyes widened, as if even he, free of any Contender’s blessing though extremely potent in his own way, could feel its potential. Eric could sense Yuki, Marsha, and Jack gazing at the pyramid structure whose true size and scope only became obvious as they grew ever closer, with awe the equal of Morlekai’s own.

  “Why do I feel like I’ve been here before?”

  Eric grinned at his debonair friend. “Because I think you just might have… but not quite in this timeline.”

  This earned a furrowed brow. “Eric…”

  “Yeah, you remember meeting your favorite Boyscout, and our adventures up to Freetown, because that involved the singularity of a half-trillion in gold. Heck, I’m increasingly certain that gold is a magical power, or stabilizer, all its own, and maybe that’s why it has so much value in this time and place, where every pound’s worth about close to 300 thousand credits and not the 28 thousand or so US dollars that it was before life as we knew it went to shit.”

  “Alright,” the older man said. “But if we’re about to head to this Mistridge Academy to unlock the keys to Legendary-Tier classes, why exactly are we heading to this ascension facility?”

  Eric inhaled to answer, before turning to his equally curious looking driving companion.

  “He doesn’t get it,” Eric said with a knowing smile, as if including Richard in the joke.

  The youth’s eyes widened, Perception then catching what the others had so far missed. “No, he doesn’t.” Yet he still had the grace to give his new friends a concerned look. “Will it keep them safe?”

  “It should. You want to break it down for our friends, or should I?”

  Alice glared from the backseat, matched by Yuki.

  “What the fuck are you assholes talking about?” The girls said in odd tandem.

  “Look up and to your right. But be discreet!” Rich said.

  Yuki frowned and did just that. “There’s nothing there.”

  But Alice was cursing under her breath. “Fuck. Fuck! We got trouble, Morlekai!”

  Morlekai’s features tightened, and Eric didn’t miss the pair of crimson friends fluttering for the nearby swaying copse of trees.

  “What’s our play?” Morlekai asked, not wasting time with hows or whys or rank.

  Eric gave the now intently frowning Rich a comradely nod. “The temple is safe. Only those friendly to my clan can enter. So I think we both know the best play for our friends.”

  Richard furrowed his brow before nodding. “Agreed. And our aerial buddies are rapidly closing.”

  Eric dipped his head. “As long as we’re making our way to the temple whose secrets they’re desperate to unlock, I think we’re safe. We’re going right where they want us to. That’s why I had us shift course. So we’re just silly patsies they can enjoy watching fall right into their hands. If we had deviated, then they might have felt the need to use their toys to force compliance, at the cost of a few fragile lives.”

  Richard’s early slice-of-life twinkling eyes and smile had turned to something hard and cold.

  A warrior ready for combat, the entire concert playing the notes of battle in his honor.

  Eric winced.

  The boy still didn’t get it, no matter how awed the look he was now giving Eric.

  “My Perception is over 300. I even got a title! So how were you able to spot them so quickly!”

  Eric blinked at this. “Seriously? You got a 300 Perception and you just broke through to Bronze? Do you have any…” He shook his head. Because it didn’t matter in the least. Not when he had been gifted with a tiny microworld’s blessings. A microworld where he had been, however briefly, the chosen one before his reality molded with their own.

  Yet in this reality… a single mistake from an overconfident young master against an exceedingly deadly foe could only have one outcome.

  Eric tapped his skull and grinned. “Dominion Tactical Interface Map. Anda few fortuitous encounters helping the elves.”

  “But wait, you’re sister is the head of the Sylvan Faction! Doesn’t that make you…”

  Eric shrugged. “I didn’t know it at the time. Point is, they’d be blinking on my interface even with my baseline Perception. And Richard? This is the part you need to understand,” he said, as the temple now came into full view before them, their levimobile slowing down as a full half dozen very serious looking steel and chrome plated mech-warriors touched down.

  He grabbed the youth’s shoulder, all of them somehow already linked as a party, a dreamlike occurrence that only the gentle fate flowing with the 30+ Charisma of their driver had put into effect. Retroactively. And Eric didn’t mind a bit.

  Because there was still shit that needed to be said.

  “Boxer Rebellion.”

  Richard froze, the cocky fire in his eyes going ice cold as Eric’s words sunk in. As the sight of power-armored mech warriors towering at nearly eight feet rapidly approached, face plates already raised. Gazing at them with sneering confidence.

  Because Eric was pretty sure he had read the former straight A scholar student right. A future doctor or engineer or business tycoon making his Manhattanite parents proud by day, an anime nerd like Eric was by night. And someone who had damn well read his history and enjoyed the grittier stories.

  Stories where the hero didn’t always win by manifest destiny

  Stories where martial artists who trained with all their heart and soul to better themselves, to tap into a strength and brotherhood that could overcome all obstacles…

  Were still effortlessly slaughtered by British soldiers.

  Butchered like pigs, their fists, hardened bodies, and multiple layers of padding proving to be absolutely no match for English bullets.

  “Those boys aren’t elite White tiers. They’re Bronze. Levels ten to thirty. And they really enjoy using T-3 Hyperion Blasters which could tear through an Abrams tank and all it’s modern counterparts as easily as you could burn through paper with the lighter you hid in your top dresser drawer.”

  “Wait, how the fuck do you know—”

  “The point, Richard, is that you were the golden boy of your own pocket realm and it was a wild and wonderful adventure, wasn’t it? But now the divine conjunction of worlds has past, your tiny ream has fused with our own, and believe me, buddy, this is the grim dark gritty anime where fuckups get to die for the vicarious pleasure of a jaded audience and you do NOT want to be a fuckup. You want to be the smart, savvy player who understands the threat, takes defensive measures, and tears his enemies a new asshole WHEN the terrain and timing favors you. NOT when half a dozen elite mercs are pointing T-3 Hyperion Blasters our way!”

  Richard’s eyes widened with something close to horrified dismay. For the first time, he looked less like a young prince coming home and more like a frightened kid in way over his head.

  Thank common sense.

  “What’s our play?” Richard asked in party-linked hyperthought matching Eric’s own. So fast that their friends were clearly only catching one word in three. So Eric slowed his thoughts enough for the entire party to register.

  “Our play is clueless idiots who want to rehire our friends to unlock glorious secrets like the treasure-hunting dreamers we are. I’ll lead. You protect us from anything that might be in the facility. Sound good?”

  And in the time it took Richard to nod, Captain Arnor and the others had effectively surrounded them, their cat-like grins making it clear they were enjoying Eric and his friends dropping right into their lap.

  Eric could work with that.