“No!” screamed Jab as his feathery fists slammed the table. His opponents' chips toppled over. “Did you mark the cards!? There is no way you got a 3 of a kind. With 3 aces of all things!”

  Lu-Lu calmly pulled the spilled chips back to himself as his simi transparent membrane turned the light blue his species was known for, ear whiskers generating a pleased hum. Lu-Lu's pleasant expression offered no condolences to Jab, not that that was the intent to begin with. “You know the rules of the game Jab.” Lu-Lu purred through his translator. “You either get to keep one suit or two stray cards from your last hand. My last hand had an ace!”

  Jab could not read the expressionless face of his soft-skinned foe. But he did not need to in order to know his alien ‘friend’ was taking advantage of a misunderstanding. Although humans were known for introducing poker to the galaxy at large, many species adopted new rules to make it more interesting to their tastes. One of which here it seemed was being able to keep a card from your past hand.

  “That's not a rule and you know it!” Jab seethed through his beak.

  But Lu-Lu's gelatinous skin wobbled as his head shook. Lu-Lu swiped through the interface his embedded translator rendered in his vision. After some swipes his tentacle made a touch gesture, and a second later Jab's own translator rendered a list of rules. “I can't help it if you did not read the station's house rules. It pays to be informed. Or in this case. Ill-informed.”

  His ’friend’ clearly had planned this. Jab clacked his beak in annoyance as he closed the window without reading it. Normally in poker the winner takes the items in the pot. This time, however, the two agreed that it would be the loser who took the spoils. A decision Jab regretted as Lu-Lu pushed the tablet to him. The tablet itself was unremarkable in every way. Just an off the shelf electronic interface. It was the document requiring a signature on it that had Jab on edge.

  Lu-Lu spoke as Jab translator applied smugness to the translation. “Why so bitter? Everyone knows how much you love humans! You even kind of talk like them.

  Well. He had picked up some of their mannerisms, but that didn’t mean he loved them.

  Lu-Lu smirked, as though he could read Jab’s thoughts. “You love those second-ranked traits of the humans, after all.”

  That statement was not far from the truth in all honesty. A lot of species had a defining trait baked into them and their cultures by their cradle world. Some species were shaped into amazing forgers. Others, farmers, cooks, warriors; the list goes on and on.

  What were humans known for? Jacks of all trades.

  This confused a lot of species at first. How can you be great in being mediocre?

  Well turns out, the humans did that very well.

  The Rasnel’s were amazing ship builders. No ship was ever so fast, no ship was ever so luxurious! But for the price of one Rasnel ship of the line, you could purchase several Human ships. That, while not as fast, could deliver more cargo at a decent speed.

  Thorkoid were fierce warriors. Known for their tactics and firepower. And while Humans were no match for them in a one-on-one fight, their ability to throw a wrench into things was nothing to underestimate.

  And on and on it went; the humans falling short of best, and yet in whatever field, they always rose near enough the top to throw a rock at it.

  Other species sought neutral defense treaties with the humans, and in turn added their races own unique gifts to the human strategies.

  If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

  This unintended synergy created a powerful, unpredictable force that could only be overcome at a price so great it was never worth it. This strategy created safety for themselves and their allies through mutually assured destruction.

  But the humans were not a grim bunch. If all they did was mutually assured destruction, they would be considered warlords. But they branched out into everything field and expertise.

  And Jab personal favorite example, the food.

  The Rush-Tak-Al came from a world of mouthwatering spices, seasonings, vegetables, fruits, savory grains, and meats. It has been said that Rush-Tak-Al dishes are to die for, and to savor for a lifetime.

  As the trend goes, however, while Human meals might not be as good, the variety they offered was vast and affordable. And did not have to be reserved five years in advance.

  Humans were outperformed in every field but were good in every field as well. Creating a unique market in which if in a bazaar, it was always worth checking out human vendors. You will find something that satisfies your need without needing to spend an arm or a leg or a tentacle to get. Jab did enjoy human food and entertainment. Especially their mystery movies and Sweet and Sour Chicken.

  But those were not the things that had Jab in a fit right now. Because humans had a behavior that annoyed him to no end.

  They were dreadfully low tech. INTENTIONALLY low tech!

  It would be one thing if they were a new species that only started their adventure among the stars. Everyone had to begin somewhere. But humans seemed to relish it. The most frustrating part was that humans did possess advanced tech, and even made some of the biggest advancements in the universe.

  They simply chose not to use it most of the time.

  How does that make sense!?

  Every sane species had anti-gravity field generators to move heavy cargo. While humans still insisted on something they called a “forklift”. A dreaded greasy dirty vehicle with wheels that physically lifted the cargo with two forks! At the same time humans would use anti-gravity fields in their station tug vessels to move heavy ships and components into place. The same vessels would then be loaded with the wheeled monstrosities. That double standard was the butt of many jokes in the greater galactic community. Regardless, the humans seemed to pay no mind.

  Jab looked at the tablet with desperation. And by proximity the assignment document it contained. Lu-Lu and himself were the only two lawyers for their company that had the necessary experience to negotiate with this human mining world. The planet in question was rich with a rare resource needed for hyperspace drives. And the one to secure a contract would not only get a very generous bonus followed with a raise, the one who sealed the deal would become indispensable and set for the rest of their career. But the prestige, raise, and tenure, were not the issue. The issue was neither of the two wanted to be stuck with the humans for the rest of their career!

  Lu-Lu grinned at him from across the table. “It’s so important to have stability in our line of work after all.”

  Jab needed to say something to stop this fate!

  No new staff would ever want to take over the assignment. Not that the higher ups would accept a replacement anyway. Whoever took the assignment would be seen as the expert. And shareholders would not want to jeopardize their income stream with a new project head. Jab would become financially set for life. But what good was money if you were stuck for cycles at a time with such illogical creatures?

  Before he could think of a response, no, an excuse!, ANYTHING!, to not be the one to take the project, his imbedded communications suite alerted him to a personal call from his higher up.

  “I am so glad you are eager for this assignment!” the audio started, proud excitement flowing in the words of his mentor. “Lu-Lu just informed me that after much persuasion he decided to step down and offer it to you.” There was some delay, as the main office was several light years away.

  Jab darted his vision just in time to see Lu-Lu make a guilty expression. He could not see what Lu-Lu's communicator pushed to his vision receptor. But it would not take a lawyer to figure out what Lu-Lu had messaged their mutual mentor.

  “I am so happy for the opportunities this assignment will offer you!” the voice of his mentor continued “You must inform me of the time you return to the main office. We will celebrate. Drinks on me! I am so proud of how far you have come.”

  Jab’s heart stopped. His supervisor was more than just a boss to answer to and push papers for. Ms Aldo was like a figurative mother to him. She helped him get this job after his schooling. Showed him the ropes, and most importantly led by example. She helped him navigate the political webs seen in difficult assignments. She always returned his calls, even when off the clock.

  He owed her everything. And he could not fathom the thought of disappointing her. Through metaphorical tears he faked a happy tone of voice, sighed, and sealed his fate “Mentor, I…” he couldn’t lie. “I will use what you taught me for the good of Hovek Shipyard.”

  Her happy tone came after a moment of delay “I cannot wait to see it!”

  The call ended. There wasn’t anything else to say, and Ms Aldo was extremely busy. Busy doing the work Jab wanted to do, dealing with the blah, blah, and blah. All species that were masters of their fields and the best of the best.

  Not the out-of-date humans.

  Lu-Lu patted his shoulder, “Good choice. It won’t be as bad as you think. I’m sure the humans you will meet will be true professionals.”

  Jab glared, but couldn’t say anything.

  Maybe…the humans would surprise him.