Twelve: A bride should not cry at her wedding.

  On the first day of the New Year, almost every palace was filled with the sound of firecrackers. Perhaps for the long-silent imperial concubines and the bored palace maids and eunuchs, this day was truly a joyful and happy one.

  Getting up early, putting on the big red brocade dress for New Year's visit, with four branches of hairpins. The wind-bleached fur on the collar of the brocade dress is extremely good, shiny and smooth, lightly brushing against the itchy cheeks, like a child scratching gently when tickled.

  Getting up and going out, Pei'er was overjoyed to bring the white fox fur-lined crane cloak from the large red velvet box to put on me. The crane cloak is a wide-sleeved and loose outer garment made of fabric woven with crane feathers, pure white in color, soft and flowing, which was specially sent by the Imperial Household Department last year as a tribute.

  I gazed deeply at the delighted Pei'er and said calmly, "Do you think it's suitable?" She was taken aback by my expression and looked at Si Yu for help in a daze.

  She took a honey-colored windbreaker and put it on me, then placed a small flat golden hand warmer in my arms and led me out.

  On the day of the grand court assembly, I really don't need to stand out too much. Especially when meeting the empress dowager for the first time, humility is the best attitude.

  After a heavy snowfall, the glazed tiles and white jade carvings of the Empress Dowager's residence, the Ning Palace, shone brightly in the morning light, evoking a sense of reverence that made one dare not gaze directly.

  Standing among the concubines in their finery, I suddenly felt tense. This was my first time formally paying respects to the Empress Dowager since entering the palace, and gazing at her up close.

  The eunuch's sharp, fine voice had called out my name. I took a deep breath, stepped forward, and performed the ritual of three kneels and nine bows, saying: "May Her Majesty the Empress Dowager enjoy good health and prosperity for ten thousand years."

  The empress's gaze fell on me, and she smiled: "I heard that the emperor is very fond of you, lift your head up and let me take a look."

  I lifted my head as I was told, with a humble and obedient gaze.

  The empress's gaze paused for a moment, and the queen beside her said, "Zhen Bijun is very sensible and has a gentle temperament."

  The empress dowager heard this and merely nodded slightly, "What is your name?"

  "Your humble servant Zhen Huan, for the first time pays respects to Her Majesty the Empress Dowager. Your humble servant requests that Her Majesty accept her most sincere greetings, and your humble servant is overjoyed." She said as she bowed again.

  "Oh..." The empress pondered, then deliberately looked me up and down again. Her gaze was calm and collected, but I felt like her eyes saw right through me, making me feel uneasy for no reason, my face flushing as I lowered my head, unsure of what to do.

  The empress dowager lifted her head again and smiled all over her face: "Very good, this child is indeed very sensible."

  I bowed my head and said softly: "As a young and inexperienced concubine, I am fortunate to have the Empress Dowager's kindness and protection, the Emperor's magnanimity, and the guidance of Her Majesty the Empress and all the elder sisters, or else I would have committed a fault."

  The Empress nodded, "It's no wonder the Emperor likes you, I also like you very much." She then ordered the palace maid to bring clothes, silk and jewelry as gifts for me.

  I knocked my head in gratitude, when the Empress suddenly asked: "Can you write?"

  The empress had already answered for me, "Zhen's emotions are very good, and it seems she also knows how to read and write."

  The empress dowager cast a sideways glance at the empress, and the empress fell silent, saying no more.

  "I said: 'I am slightly literate in writing, but my handwriting is clumsy and awkward, I'm afraid it won't meet the empress dowager's standards.'"

  The Empress Dowager smiled warmly: "It's good that you can write, come to the Ning Palace often to accompany me, and help me copy scriptures."

  I was overjoyed and said: "As long as Your Majesty doesn't despise me for being clumsy, I am willing to serve you wholeheartedly."

  The empress's smile grew brighter, and as I knelt before her, I could see clearly only when she smiled. The empress in her prime was unexpectedly more haggard than women of similar age, with fine wrinkles at the corners of her eyes like fish tails densely scattered. Perhaps it was my misconception, but I felt that amidst the smile surrounded by pearls, jade, and brocade, there was a hint of inexplicable sorrow and fatigue.

  Starting from the 14th of the first month, my mood has been wrapped in anticipation and expectation. It wasn't until the morning of the 15th that I finally woke up at the fourth watch, unable to fall back asleep. The servant girl was startled by me and laughed, saying: "Young master is awake so early, it's still early, Master Zhen will have to pay his respects to the Emperor first, and won't be able to come and talk with you until noon."

  I sat cross-legged and slanted in my bed, thinking to myself: "It's indeed still early. I've just been thinking that since entering the palace, I haven't seen my brother again, and with the border being bitter and cold, my heart has always been worried."

  "Master, why don't you sleep a bit longer? By noon, you'll be refreshed."

  I agreed with a "good", but my heart was tied up and I couldn't sleep soundly after tossing and turning several times.

  It wasn't easy to get to noon, but suddenly I heard a joyful voice outside: "The young master has arrived."

  I was just about to get up to welcome him, but the eunuch hastily said: "The young master cannot get up, this is not in accordance with etiquette." I had no choice but to sit back down properly. Then three or four palace maids and eunuchs rushed to lift the curtain, saying "Congratulations to the young master!" My brother strode in, performed the ritual of bowing to the emperor, and only then did I dare get up, forcing back tears, calling out "Brother——"

  It's been years since we last met, and my brother's face has added a lot of wind and frost, his eyebrows and eyes have become more determined, and he is full of spirit. However, the look in his eyes when he looks at me is still the same doting and indulgence as when I was in the boudoir.

  I sat down with my brother, just in time for lunch, and he said: "Just now the Emperor has asked me to stay behind at Jie Shou Hall to have a meal together."

  I slightly raised an eyebrow, "Is it something Your Majesty uses with my brother?"

  "Yes. The Emperor is very kind to me, probably because of your favor."

  I thought for a moment and suddenly understood. I just smiled and said, "Today is the Lantern Festival, brother will accompany me to eat a bowl of yuanxiao."

  The Yuanxiao in the palace is delicate, with rose petal honey sesame filling, water-milled flour skin, and golden osmanthus flowers sprinkled on top. I personally hold a bowl and place it in front of my brother, saying: "Guarding the border is bitter and cold, I suppose there's no exquisite food to eat, today let me put more thought into it for you."

  "Brother smiled and said: 'I'm fine, I've just been worried that you wouldn't be used to life in the palace. Now it seems that the Emperor is very good to you, so I can rest assured.'"

  I pursed my lips and lowered my head, "What's good or bad, it's just the emperor's favor."

  Chatted for a while, brother suddenly hesitated, I was very curious, he finally said: "Before entering the palace, my father told me one thing, and asked you to make a decision -" but didn't continue.

  I thought for a moment, covering my mouth and laughing: "Is it about Brother wanting to marry a sister-in-law? I wonder which young lady from which mansion?"

  "Big brother took out a paper note, on which were written the names of three to five women, followed by their family background and age. 'Father has already selected several candidates, but we still need you to make the final decision.'"

  I was slightly surprised, "I don't even know these young ladies, how can I make decisions for them?"

  "Father said that sister is now a concubine by the emperor's side, you should make up your mind soon."

  "I thought for a moment and said, 'That's right. If I were to choose, it would also be the honor of our Zhen family.' With a playful smile, I added, 'Brother has his heart set on someone, so sister will choose that person too.'"

  My brother shook his head, and his gaze fell on the embroidered handkerchief in my hand. "I don't have anyone I care about." His eyes settled, but his voice was somewhat evasive. I looked at him suspiciously, and then took a closer look at the handkerchief in my hand. It was the one Ling Rong had newly embroidered and given to me the other day. The embroidery depicted a sparse tree with osmanthus flowers, light pink blossoms, and shallow golden auspicious clouds around it. The stitches were also her signature fine and delicate work.

  I was startled in my heart, and suddenly brought up some past memories. I smiled faintly and said: "Brother seems to like the flower of the pomegranate tree very much?" I pointed at a woman named Xue Qiaotao on the list and said: "This Miss Xue comes from a noble family, is knowledgeable and reasonable, I also heard about her when I was in the boudoir. What does brother think?"

  "Brother's smile was somewhat distant, 'Father wants you to choose, what objections can I have?'"

  I must say with conviction: "Brother's own wife, how can he not have his own opinion?"

  The silver spoon in his hand tapped against the porcelain bowl, making a light "ding" sound. He said softly, "What's the use of having an idea? I remember you didn't want to enter the palace as a concubine back then, but now it's all good anyway. Whether or not you have an idea is already settled. To be honest, I don't know any of the women on this list, whoever it is will do."

  I took a deep breath, and the warm spring-like atmosphere in the hall was almost unbearable with the chill of my brother's words. My gaze shifted, and Xi Zhen immediately smiled and said: "The young master hasn't seen the gentleman for a long time, I'm afraid there are many private matters to discuss, let's go out first." With that, he led the way, bowed and excused himself, and went out.

  I barely changed color, tossed the handkerchief on the table and smiled again: "Ling Rong's embroidery skills are getting better and better. During the summer vacation, she embroidered a pair of connected peach blossom pictures for the emperor, which pleased the emperor very much."

  "Brother lightly said 'oh', seemingly not very concerned, only saying: "Ling Rong is the daughter of the county magistrate, her family background is not high, being able to have today's outcome is also quite difficult."

  I looked at his expression and slightly put my mind at ease, saying: "Brother just said that, is it intentional? If so, let Huier go and tell Father, I'm sure it's not a difficult thing."

  After a brief silence, his brother said: "No." He paused and said: "Miss Xue is very good." His voice was slightly low, "Qingtiao is a good name, suitable for the house."

  Just as I was speaking, a slender figure suddenly appeared outside the window, and I don't know when it arrived. I almost suspected it was Fairy Blue, and my tone unconsciously became three points heavier, saying: "Who is outside?"

  Suddenly, the brocade curtain was lifted, and a figure entered with a smile, saying: "I originally wanted to come in, but I didn't know that Junxi said that Mr. Zhen was also here, so I thought I'd tell someone to put down the narcissus and leave. Who knew that sister saw me?" She then asked: "Long time no see, is Mr. Zhen well?"

  The elder brother hurriedly stood up and bowed, only then did he dare to sit down.

  I saw Ling Rong, and my heart was almost startled. I thought that if she had heard the words just now, it would be inevitable to hurt her again, and I couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed on my face. But in my eyes, I only paid attention to whether their expressions were abnormal.

  Ling Rong still looked as usual, but with a man present, she was slightly more restrained. Her brother also followed the etiquette of meeting imperial consorts and didn't dare to raise his head to speak casually. The two couldn't see anything out of the ordinary.

  Just sitting like this, it's a bit restrictive, and for a while, it's all dull. In the embroidered silk curtains, the faint scent of agarwood wafted, and the smoke rose from the golden boshan furnace, entwining with the branches, dispersing and gathering, who knows whether it merged into one or disappeared, only feeling that everything in front of me doesn't look quite real.

  I had no choice but to break the silence and said: "Brother, would you like another bowl of tangyuan? I'm afraid it won't be enough to fill your stomach."

  "Never mind," said the elder brother. "My teeth have been aching all day today, so it's better to eat less sweets."

  "What's with brother always eating medicine, his toothache is not getting any better."

  Brother smiled warmly, "You don't know, I'm a man, but I'm most afraid of taking bitter medicine, it's better to just let the pain be."

  Ling Rong suddenly closed his eyes and sniffed lightly, saying in a soft voice: "One of the ingredients for making Bahe Xiang is Dingzi Xiang, which is made from the flower buds of cloves. Holding it in your mouth can relieve toothache, not only is it not bitter but also leaves a fragrant aftertaste, young master might as well give it a try."

  Her brother's gaze seemed to unintentionally sweep across her face as he said, "Thank you, young master."

  Ling Rong's body trembled slightly, and she couldn't help but laugh too. "Just coming in from outside, it still feels a bit chilly." She asked her brother a few questions before bidding farewell: "There are some things to attend to in the Ling Rong Palace, so I'll take my leave first."

  I saw her leave. Fang sat down and gently scooped up the silver spoon in his hand, the hard texture touching the soft wontons, almost as if it couldn't withstand the force. I just smiled: "As long as Brother likes Miss Xue, it's good, I don't know when the wedding will be held, Huan'er must congratulate Brother properly."

  My brother's face had a smile similar to joy, but I couldn't see the expression of joy. He said: "It shouldn't be too soon, right? In three days, I'll be heading back to the border, and the Emperor has allowed me to return once every three months to report on my duties." The shallow sunlight of winter fell on my brother's robust figure, casting a faint golden glow around him.

  I couldn't continue talking about brother's marriage, so I said: "Has His Majesty already spoken with you?"

  He heard this and his eyes were no longer as calm as before. His expression turned solemn and he said, "I will follow the Emperor's orders, even if it means certain death."

  I nodded, "With Brother's words, I and the Emperor can rest assured. The King of Ru Nan and Murong are not good people to deal with, you must be careful in your response." My voice was slightly choked, "Don't say anything about dying a thousand deaths again, on New Year's Day, did you intentionally want me to feel sad?"

  Brother fondly stretched out his hand to stroke my hair, "You're still acting like a spoiled child, just like before, not grown up at all. Alright, I promise you, I'll definitely take care of myself."

  I burst out laughing, "Brother is going to marry his sister-in-law, can Xiaoyu still not grow up?" I slightly restrained my smile, took out a roll of paper and handed it to my brother, "If something unexpected happens, immediately send this letter out by carrier pigeon, someone will respond."

  "Okay," said his brother in a low voice.

  Although they were close relatives, they were ultimately restricted by the palace rules and could not stay for long. She personally escorted her brother to the outside of the Weeping Flower Gate, unable to hold back tears, but struggled not to cry. Her brother spoke warmly: "In three months' time, we might be able to meet again." He glanced around at the surrounding palace maids and eunuchs, speaking in a low voice: "With so many people around, don't lose your composure."

  I nodded vigorously, "I won't be able to stay by Father and Mother's side often, so please, Brother, take care of them more and tell Yurou and Yuwan to listen to them." My throat choked up and I couldn't continue speaking, turning around without looking at my brother's departing back. As I returned to the palace, I suddenly saw two pots of narcissus placed on the steps in front of the hall, and asked casually, "Were they sent by Ling Rong's young master just now?"

  "Yes."

  I hesitated for a moment and asked: "How long did Young Master Ling wait outside before he came in?"

  Jing Qing said: "It won't be long before you ask who's outside, Young Master."

  I finally felt at ease and scolded: "You're so slow in reporting such things."

  Jing Qing didn't yield, "Ling Rong said it's not hindering the young master and young lady from reuniting, that's why she didn't let us servants spread the news." Seeing my slightly furrowed eyebrows, he finally didn't dare to say anything more.

  However, I was careful and noticed that Ling Rong was just as usual, accompanying Xuan Ling and talking to me, making me suspect that I was being too paranoid.

  The days passed smoothly, and after Brother returned, he proposed to the Xue family, and the marriage was gradually settled.