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Book II - Chapter Nineteen – Yeasty Feet

  I stood in the glade near where Rainforest World met the Dinosaur Swamps.

  Scanning. Processing. Please refrain from querying while this unit scans and processes the fungal pattern.

  Billie backed away from Jack. "What are you and Opal talking about?"

  Holly, though, finally stepped out of the ferns and into the glade. She’d heard what I’d said to Opal. "I understand. Communication might be possible. The human brain is a complex series of neurochemicals and electricity. Neurons fire as different electrical impulses take place within the cells. It could be that the mold on the dinosaur might have that same complexity. We know very little about the human mind."

  HOST COMPANION: Holly Croft understands basic concepts. Scanning.

  While us humans were freaking out, Jack and Reggie just kept on chewing like it was no big deal that they might be covered in sentient fungal armor capable of communication. I had to laugh or go crazy.

  Jack and Reggie finally finished chewing up their sheep, and they looked at me like chihuahuas ready for another bowl of Alpo. However, that was not going to happen at the moment because I was busy with my alien ring and potentially sentient fungi.

  Finally, Opal got back to us.

  Scanning complete. Processing complete. Sentience detected. Language possible. Query advised. Waiting for query.

  I had to let the women know what was going on. "Okay, girls. It looks like we can talk to the fungal armor on the dinosaurs. Don't look at me like that. I'm not in charge. I only work here."

  Billie's eyes widened. "What do you say to dinosaur mold? I have no idea. Like…okay, I think I got it.” She lifted a hand. “’Hello. We mean you no harm. We will give you food if you guard our front door.’ How was that?”

  “That is unlikely to work, I think,” Holly said.

  Billie frowned. “Well, excuse me. I've never fucking talked to a dinosaur before.”

  We all really were staring at Billie like she had grown another head. Khanna looked at me and asked in ancient Arcadian, "Khanna not like that Sid Marshall speaks to spirits. Khanna think this is bad idea. Khanna think we should run."

  I had to calm the huntress down. " I think it's going to be okay. Let's just see what the nice dinosaur mushrooms have to say.”

  I turned my attention to my friendly artificial intelligence. "Okay, Opal. Ask them if they can understand you. And tell them that we come in peace. I think that's a good place to start."

  Billie snorted. "We should say something like, 'take me to your leader.’ Who knows, they might be from like some like fungal empire. I can't believe this is my life."

  Opal ignored her.

  HOSTNAME: Sid Marshall. Query accepted. Transmitting data. Connection complete. Dialogue is possible between entities. Translation activated.

  I had no idea what the A.I. was really saying to them, but I only could hope that it wouldn't get us killed. It took a minute, but then I heard a different voice inside my head. It was high-pitched voice, like a chipmunk inhaling helium.

  This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

  Funny stick people with yeasty feet. Greetings. We appreciate the food stuffs you provide for our World Beast. You have been helpful in keeping the colonies alive. We thank you.

  "Uh, you're welcome?" I said out loud. I could probably have used some sort of telepathy, but I wasn’t going to risk muddying the waters. “So how did you find—”

  The voice cut me off.

  Yeasty foot person. We find your sentience surprising. With your limited eyesight, we understand you can only see primitive color patterns. You may refer to me as White Colony.

  I was about to respond when a different voice erupted in my head. It had that same high-pitched tone, but this one was in a lower register, a huge man’s voice sped up. We should not talk with stick person with yeasty feet. We provide food for our World Beasts on our own, White Colony. Many of our advanced teams have been repulsed by their natural immune system. Funny stick people have powerful bodies. Unnecessary communication. They are limited beings with disgusting procreation habits.

  Billie stood with her arms crossed. “Uh, Sid, do you wanna let us know what's going on?”

  “It's complicated. Uh, Black Colony doesn't like us, but White Colony seems interested in being friends.”

  White Colony had definitely thoughts about that. Funny stick person with potentially comfortable groin and underarms. Friendship is unlikely, since while you provide us with sustenance for our World Beasts, we cannot offer services in return. What service could we provide you while we wait for your bodies to wither and die before we colonize your cells for our own purposes as is our way, the Way of Molzo. We will merge with you upon the eve of your death.

  Black Colony didn’t like that response. White Colony, you should not have told the strange primate with too much enemy bacteria in their stomach and intestines that we might one day colonize their cells. You should not have mentioned the Way of Molzo.

  Khanna gripped her spear. “What are the spirits of the monsters saying to you now, Sid Marshall?”

  “Uh, I’m not sure. I think they have a religion, and it has something to do with eating us when we are dead.”

  White Colony didn’t like that answer. No, strange slender creature with delicious orifices—

  I cut them off. “Sid. You can call me Sid. Can I just call you Jack and Reggie? It’s what I named the T. rexes.”

  White Colony, or Jack, didn’t seem to mind the interruption. Yes, Sid, we will refer to you as Sid. I will be Jack. Black Colony will be Reggie. What did you call Green Colony before you slew Green Colony’s World Beast?

  “Green Albert.”

  Billie let out a frustrated grunt. “Once again, we’re left out of the conversation. He's talking with dinosaurs and we're standing around here with our thumbs up our butts. Sorry, Professor.”

  Holly shrugged. “It is frustrating, but I trust Sid’s discretion.”

  “Sorry, girls, but I have to keep talking with Jack. I think I’m making progress.” I turned to the white T. rex. “I didn’t know that you were sentient mushroom armor. Sorry.”

  It is all right, Sid! We didn’t know you were sentient either until only recently.

  Reggie wasn’t so friendly. The level of sentience is still up for debate. Our World Beasts have instincts that could be confused with sentience. I am leaving to find more food stuffs. My control over my World Beast is slipping. My World Beast certainly believes that Sid and his yeasty feet would make a fine meal.

  Jack literally sighed in my mind. Black Colony, I doubt your control is slipping. You are impatient for you do not believe Sid offers us benefit. And you are angry that Green Colony has left us. Lastly, you are worried he knows of the Way of Molzo, but I say, all should know the Way of Molzo!”

  “Where is Green Colony?” I asked.

  But Reggie stormed away, the thing’s giant footsteps making the ground shake. It then roared, probably in frustration.

  Jack gave me a long look, and I could see some kind of intelligence there. The sentient fungus’s spores must’ve infiltrated his brain. I will leave you now and speak with Reggie. I believe I can convince them that working with you would be interesting and productive. I do want this to be an equal partnership. If you provide us food, what can we provide you?

  “You could come and keep watch over our house. There would be more food for you, as long as you don’t mind eating sentient shark people. I think they might be sentient. Not sure.”

  I will consider your words. Goodbye, Sid, and thank you for the food stuffs!

  Jack then went charging away, down the broad highway, trying to catch Reggie, otherwise known as Black Colony.

  On the way back to Lonetree Ridge, I went over aspect of my strange conversation with the fungal colonies covering the T. rexes. In the end, it had worked out better than I could’ve ever hoped for.

  But what was the Way of Molzo?

  Land of the Lust: Guns of K'Shaul), so if you can't wait, you can run on over there to keep on reading. And if you have some extra cash and like the story, I have a PayPal.

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