Zach approached his office door, feet dragging. It was the first day of committee shmoozing and he was dreading it. He numbly kicked the door open and slumped into his chair. The computer screens on his desk sat black and dead. Zach felt that to his core. Wait. Screens? He counted up the number of screens on his desk … and then recounted.
“Why do I have an extra monitor?” he mumbled.
The sound of Bon Jovi roared from his phone. Zach scrambled to turn off the alarm. Normally, she would let the alarm ring for a bit to get his mood up, but that not an option today. He gripped his suitcase and dragged himself out of the office.
Back in the hall, he lumbered along towards the elevators. Once there he pushed the button with the intention of going to the top floor. These meetings didn’t have to be on the top floor, but it was “good for image,” according to Maria. He got into the elevator and practiced straightening up.
Do not show weakness. Do not show weakness.
A couple minutes later and she was standing outside of the committee meeting room. He willed his feet to move but to no avail. It would take something stronger to get him in here.
“Uh, excuse me…”
Zach turned around. “Oh, sorry. Are you going in?”
The woman tapped her foot, obviously impatient. “Yes,”
The investigator stepped to the side. “By all means.”
She went in, giving Zach a concerned look.
Great. What a great first impression.
He finally managed to go in. The room was large, spacious and decorated in ‘rugged’ wood. ‘Rugged’ as in made to look rough, but carefully sculpted and expensive. The u-shaped table was already filled with occupants save for two seats. A long table lined the presentation area, complete with access to the project and an additional podium.
Zach silently made for the podium and set down his briefcase, hoping that there would be no technical difficulties. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on one’s view, there were no hiccups in the set up and he was ready for the presentation on time.
“Good morning, everyone,” he greeted as cordially as he could. “I’m Zach Smith and I will be telling you about the updates in protocols here at Solutions.”
One of the members called out, “Didn’t we do that yesterday?”
“Yes, well. There have been a number of protocol changes, so it’s going to take more than one talk to get through them all.”
“Is this the last one?” said another.
“…No.”
The group exchanged glances.
Not a good start. “Ahem…there should only be one more after this and I will be giving that one, too. Now…” He turned towards the screen, pressing the remote button. “…the main topic that I’m going to address today is safety.”
Several members of the committee visibly rolled their eyes.
“There have been a number of updates in terms of safety protocols at the national scale. With these updates and some international contracts, it was decided to try to merge and streamline the documentation process.”
Another member piped up. “You tried to streamline it? How did that go?”
Not well. “It has been a challenge. Now, I will go over –”
“Is that even allowed?”
“I’m sorry?”
“To streamline paperwork like that.”
Another member cut in. “I’m sure he’ll go through that if it comes up.”
The member held up his hands in surrender. “I’m just saying.”
With that, Zach was able to awkwardly redirect everyone’s attention back to the presentation. About twenty minutes later, the presentation finished without further interruption.
And now for the Q&A. Zach could feel his blook pressure rising.
“So does any of this actually improve safety?” said one member who had previously questioned streamlining paperwork.
“Huh?”
“I mean, I’ve seen all sorts of ‘improvements’ to safety. And usually all that means is that training time is increased to add something like “ladder training.’”
One of the other members cut in again. “All safety training exists because someone died. So, if someone dies on a ladder, then ladder training is added.”
“You’re joking.” He sunk into his chair and muttered loudly enough so that everyone else could hear, “Sounds like a Darwin award.”
“Stop acting coddled!”
“What? For asking a question about safety that even a child should know?”
“How very fortunate for you that all the children you know dependably get that training. The real work isn’t so consistent.”
This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
And things broke down after that. Admittedly, this was worse than usual. Usually, he’d be asked all sorts of nitpicking questions so that each member felt like they contributed. Nope. Two of them decided to start insulting each other, so no nitpicking questions were asked. Instead, Zach had to try to get between the members.
“Hold it! Hold it!” He waved his hands frantically. “I realize this topic can be contentious, but how about we leave it for after the presentation?”
“Leave it?” said the paperwork guy. “He just started insulting me for asking a legitimate question?”
“Legitimate? You used that just so that you’d have an opening to start insulting people yourself!”
The two continued to yell at each other.
Well, that didn’t work.
“You do this every time! Why do you even bother being on these committees!”
“Why? Why?! So that prisses like you can’t infantilize everything!”
“What?”
“Yeah, you heard me! And that’s exactly what’s going on here!” The paperwork guy got up, and stomped one foot on his chair.
One of the female members then slugged him. Not slapped, punched.
The paperwork guy fell down, holding his jaw and looking up at here.
“What was that for?!”
“Disorderly conduct,” she stated. She then turned to Zach, “Call security!”
“Uh, yes…” he stammered and then proceeded to trip on his way out.
A couple of minutes later, Zach and two security guards reentered, to what looked like the beginnings of a brawl between three members.
Security sprang into action, pulling away the member screaming obscenities and flailing the most, paperwork guy. The room started to calm down once he was subdued. One guard turned to the others, saying, “I will need you to come with us as well.”
The other two grunted an assent and the group left.
The room fell into an awkward silence.
Not sure what else to do, Zach meekly, suggested, “So, shall we continue with the Q&A?”
Everyone remaining looked at him with a blank face.
“Uh, sure.”
“If we can finish…”
“Can we?”
Zach clapped his hands together. “Okay! Questions?”
The remaining members politely raised their hands.
“What resources are required to maintain the OSHA/WHMIS system? That’s gotta be hard.”
“That … is a very good question. I can find out and let you know later.”
“What about other countries? Are you planning on combining all of the safety documentation for every country you work with?”
“Ah, there was some attempt at standardizing safety at a general, international scale. There’s already a lot of overlap with what we have. In general, more information is required, but otherwise the forms are visually very similar.”
“But are you planning to?”
“That has not been determined yet. The current system is still new.”
Another raised her hand. “About the safety training, how do you determine who gets what training?”
Zach could answer that one. “When workers are first put into the system, their responsibilities and access are listed in the system. That determines what training they need.”
“So, that’s established protocol?”
“Yes, that’s one thing that hasn’t changed.”
“What if someone’s position changed or a contract requires more access.”
“The preexisting system requires that information to be inputted before the position change or contract is accepted. So, it’s kept up to date.”
“And the changes?”
The remainder of the meeting continued in this manner. Much, much calmer and constructive. Zach was almost sad to see these members go. Almost. They still grilled him with questions. But they were polite and genuine about it.
He headed back to his office, relief flowing over him. The relief was so strong that his arms became heavy, pulling his whole posture down. Once back in his office, he flopped into his chair.
It was done.
Oh, wait. He had the other one to do that afternoon.
He grimaced, shaking his fists at the ceiling.
That released, he took a deep breath.
There’s only on more. One more and I’m done until the committees finish their subsequent meeting and may ask for another presentation. He was still done by the afternoon.
He grabbed his jacket and headed out for an early lunch when re ran into Mac in the hallway.
They stood still neither daring to break the silence.
Zach bit his lip. “You heard, didn’t you?”
“A brawl between committee members. It’s certainly a company first.” He jutted a thumb back. “Care for a beet?”
“It’s lunch and I have another presentation this afternoon.”
“Yikes.” Mac scratched his head. “Well, we can still take a long lunch. You up for it?”
“Yeah, sure. Maybe we can talk about that trip to the Philippines.”
“Sure.”
As they walked, Mac attempted to gather other information. “How’s Maria?”
“Annoyed at being told to work at home for the rest of the week.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, I’d be terrified if I was that intruder. Now that the situation has settled in, Maria would be out for blood if something like that happened again.”
“I’ve got to say, there’s been a lot going on in your department lately. Wasn’t there also something odd that you found while preparing for the presentation?”
Zach twitched.
“Sorry. Bad taste.”
“No, no. You’re right. There was that instance of a tunnel mysteriously appearing.”
“Any updates on that?”
“The tunnel is stable, so it could be analyzed much more closely. The tunnel was definitely man-made … and had been left untouched long enough for possums to nest there.”
Mac chortled. “I wish you had gotten a video of that. I truly do.”
“There is one thing that popped up when working from home the next day.”
“What was that?”
“Well, there were traces of copper along the entire length. Not the copper penny stuff, but the for research only, high quality stuff that is absurdly expensive.”
“You think someone has been skimming minerals?”
“It looks suspiciously like that may be going on, but it still doesn’t explain how the tunnel got there in the first place without anyone knowing.”
“That’s probably not the case.”
“Hm?”
“Someone had to know.”
“Right. Question is, who? Which means that someone is lying. Or at least is information hoarding.”
“How do you get around it?”
“Someone slips up about it. And thankfully, someone already has.”
“Ah – Wait. Really?”
By this time, they arrived at one of the nearby restaurants. Zach was so engrossed in his various tasks that he barely managed to take note. They sat down and Zach put a halt on their discussion. He then took his time decided on what to order, ignoring Mac’s impatient foot tapping. When they had finally finished ordering their burgers, Zach tried to change the subject.
“So, about the Philippines –”
Mac interrupted. “No.” He shook his head. “No. You cannot just drop that bomb and change topics.” He tapped his finger on the table. “Start explaining.”
Zach laughed. “As I’m sure you know, information hoarding can have various triggers, all problematic.”
“Uh, sure…”
He doesn’t know. “It doesn’t matter if it’s plain insecurity or embezzlement, information hoarding is triggered by both and ultimately damages the company.” He waved his hand. “By how much is a matter of degree.”
Mac frowned. “And suddenly, I’m a bit concerned as to why you know this.”
“Do you want me to finish or not?”
His friend’s demeanor changed to gracious. “By all means.”
“Finding the information hoarder gives the starting point, but finding what triggers it is what reveals what’s going on. In this case, I’m suspecting a combination of skimming and identity theft.”
“Huh?”
“One of the members of the cybersecurity department knows how to check for this stuff. I asked her to check on a couple things for me. If there’s a match, we find the skimmer and with that, why and how the tunnel was dug. I specifically asked her to check –”
Ding!
He picked up his phone. “What timing!”
“Is it that cybersecurity expert?”
“Yep. And it looks like I will be making one last trip to Bunker’s Ditch.”