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Chapter 145 Reminiscing

  Trillia's heart skipped a beat as she found herself kneeling. A dozen notifications rang out in her mind before the Queen reigned in her aura. Trillia had to wonder just how terrifying the woman truly was.

  As Uncle Stas started cackling, Trillia found her footing. "That was scary. I don't think I much like dealing with nobles. It was different in D'Jamu because everyone was so terrified of angering Lord Arlyss."

  "Ehhh... not all of them, but a lot of nobles are spineless fucking cowards who hide behind loopholes and mercenaries to stay alive." Brutus didn't seem particularly thrilled at the idea of them as he spoke.

  "While I agree that they are mostly useless parasites. They are still well-loved by the people under them. They also stand as pillars of the community and an easy way to deal with famines, trade wars, and things of that nature. For what they lack in a spine on the field of combat, they absolutely make up for with their ability to navigate trade deals and a market." Alliyah stretched after her statement.

  "So. Have you all made your decision?"

  Trillia glanced at her friends, still hesitant. Amelia stepped forward. "Much to her dismay. We won't lose her again."

  The minotaur faltered in her words before looking at not only the Queen but the generals across from them. "We have no idea what the war was like. We can only guess at the losses suffered. But if there is a chance we're all going to die to some stupid beast. We'd much rather be strong enough to save as many lives as we can. We'd much rather spend as much time as we can with our friends making memories."

  Brutus raised a small metal flask. "Glory to the fallen. May they live eternal in our memories."

  The other generals repeated the mantra, and each produced their own flask in hand and poured a small bit of alcohol out onto the ground. The Queen did the same. Alliyah stepped down fully from the throne and stood in front of the group. "I'm proud of you all. I know it can be scary, but I promise you have good people backing you up. You don't have to go into this as blindly as we did. You won't fight alone."

  Amelia nodded. She opened her mouth to speak but shook her head and stepped back.

  "Speak. Say what's on your mind. There are no nobles or merchants here. I may as well be your Aunt, as well as I knew your parents."

  Amelia looked back at Alliyah and nodded. "I... I was just wondering if you could spare a few minutes to talk about Mom? A lot of the minotaurs didn't want to talk about her. I think the hurt was too much. I understand if now isn't the time, it's just that you off-"

  Amelia went quiet as Alliyah raised a hand. "I'd love to. I have some of her old songs that she wrote when she was still young if you'd like to see them?" Amelia's eyes lit up.

  Alliyah motioned to the others. "I won't be holding any more council meetings for the next few weeks. I like to let the bastards squirm and really think about what they need to say to me. Trillia. I wasn't joking about that proclamation. I expect you not to abuse it, but if you and your party need something, ask. You will be going on a life-threatening journey for the good of the empire. As much as you may have your own motives, that doesn't change the fact that Kadessa will back you with all the might it can."

  Alliyah took Amelia's hand and led the young woman away. Trillia nodded and started giving some serious thought about anything her group and she might need. Trillia heard Uncle Stas' limbs tapping against the ground.

  "Look at how much you've grown, lad." Trillia realized that he was speaking to Simon and couldn't help but look over at the reunion.

  "I've been well fed and well taken care of by the church."

  Stas reached out and grabbed the young Gryphon knight by the shoulders. "No small amount of your own blood, sweat, and tears went into becoming the man that stands before me. Look, Simon. I..."

  Simon shook his head. "No need to apologize, Dad. The Church had to deal with more than a few people who wanted me dead. It was only by Queen Alliyah's reputation, temper, and stalwart defense of the Church of Mercy that nothing happened. I know why you put me in their care. I... I hope I've grown strong enough that you don't think of me as a burde-"

  The little goblin couldn't finish his sentence at Stas pulled him into a hug that probably could have crushed stones. "Don't you for a second think it was because I saw you as the burden. I thought I would be the burden in your life. I thought my very existence near you would cause you no end of suffering and strife. Your mother wanted me to retire and enjoy a life raising our kids and tinkering. After I lost her and the rest of your siblings..."

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  Simon smiled and slowly pulled away. "I understand. I'd like to do some training with you. Taz and I don't meet any other people who can use the same type of mana. I've heard rumours that you're quite a fast flier. If you have the time."

  Stas looked down at Simon and behind him to the gryphon that was waiting intently on the answer. "I just want you to know. If you're seen with me. If people know. Some people may still come after you. I don't want to deny you after all these years but...you need to know the risks."

  The gryphon cawed loudly and tapped Simon's helmet. The little goblin wore the same big smile. "Let them try. I'm not a weak little goblin who can be bullied anymore."

  Stas nodded, and it seemed like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. Amara came over and slapped her fellow General on the back. "Great! You two catch up and do a bit of aerial fighting. Cause once you're done playing around, I haven't had a good aerial fight in decades, and that Gryphon of yours looks damn speedy, I wanna see if I can beat him in a race."

  Taz cawed again and clacked its talons against the floor. Simon grinned and motioned. "Shall we go and see about that now?"

  "I gotta see this." Fred, Malor, and Layla followed the group out. Trillia found herself staring up at the stained glass ceiling.

  "Heavy is the burden of those that lead." Cordaos spoke somberly as he stood next to Trillia. Brutus had flopped down on the steps of the throne and was taking a long drink from his flask.

  "Is it always going to be so nerve-wracking? Everyone is putting on smiles, but I can feel a tenseness in the air."

  "War does that, kiddo." Brutus spoke as he took to lying down on the steps and staring up at the ceiling himself. "I can't speak for the cow, but before every single fight with the [Primordials]. I was scared shitless."

  Cordaos glanced over at the legendary duelist. "Brutus has the right of it. Part of me wants to tell you it gets easy to encourage you. But I don't want you to be caught off guard. The first time you see a [Primordial] up close. The first time you see tens of thousands of creatures, the weakest of which is in the low hundreds. You're going to be absolutely frozen in terror."

  Trillia looked up at her Uncle. He had also taken to looking up at the many scenes and depictions in the glass. "How do I keep fighting? How do I lead my friends through battle and out the other side?"

  Cordaos smiled. "I think it was easier for us. All I had to do was remember the chains around my neck and the whips at my back in the arena. My life was already over."

  Brutus spoke up again from his prone position. "Best we can all tell, it's why Lord Darktone will only form a pact with a slave. He knows how heavy the yoke of slavery is. He knows firsthand the toll it takes on the mind. We'd all fight like rabid dogs to avoid going back to it. We'd kill thousands to prevent our friends from suffering that fate."

  Trillia didn't really have that lifetime to lean on. Her eyes went from Cordaos to Brutus to the ceiling. Cordaos put a hand on her shoulder. "Think of Tormash and Ralrouk's kids."

  Trillia turned her gaze to meet his. "Think of your friends in Red River dungeon. Imagine them dead, dying, or enslaved. Sear those images into your heart, mind, and soul. When you step up to an enemy that seems insurmountable. You remember those memories. You remember what the cost of failure is. I have faith that you'll pull through."

  "If the two of you will excuse me, I am going to join my daughter and Alliyah. I'd like to have some fond memories of Maeve restored."

  Brutus raised his flask as the minotaur king left the throne room. "All the flowery words don't mean shit."

  Once more, Trillia found her eyes drawn to the man instead of the ceiling. With a huff, he sat up and turned his eyes to her. "It's gonna hurt, kid. You will lose someone. It's only a matter of time. There are gonna be days that you wake up decades later, and they don't even cross your mind. Other days, you'll wake up and reach for some trinket or artifact, thinking you can just send them a message cause you haven't heard from them in a while. Then their death is gonna hit you like a fucking giant. The worst part? I couldn't tell you which hurts worse."

  "Do you ever pray? To talk to them or see them again?"

  Brutus stared at the little orc for a while before looking back up at the ceiling. "Every fucking day. Don't get me wrong. I will always be grateful that Lord Darktone gave me a second chance. But I didn't know I could feel pain like the pain of losing a wife and kids. Every time I pass a monument to the people we lost. I question whether they'd still be alive had I been around to fight the beast that took them from me." The man took the last drink of his flask and stared at the opening angrily.

  He tucked it into a pouch on his belt and put his hands on his knees, pushing himself to a standing position. Slowly, he walked over to Trillia. "You're a tough kid. Way fucking stronger than I was at your age. You want my advice?"

  Trillia nodded.

  "If it's a question of this world or your friends? Choose your friends. Burn your soul up in a glorious blaze if you have to. But don't ever regret choosing people who could give a shit less about you, over the people who are willing to walk into Behemoth Valley so that they can spend a little more time with you. Love and friendship is more valuable than a thousand legends. If I could do it all again, I'd die a hundred deaths and live a thousand lives in slavery if it meant my wife and kids were running around."

  Brutus sighed and headed towards the doors.

  "Uncle Brutus."

  The duelist paused and glanced back at her.

  "I love you. I'm glad you're still alive to help us all one more time. I'll pray to all the gods I know that your family can visit you in your dreams. Thank you for saving us before."

  Brutus turned his face away from her. Trillia thought she heard him sniffle. "Silly orc. Just as sentimental as your mother. I'll be back later today. I'll do what I can to make sure you have the strength to save everyone."

  Trillia smiled at his back as he also left, closing the doors behind him. Trillia slowly wandered out to stand in the middle of the room. "I will get strong enough that no one else has to die. I don't care what I have to sacrifice for it."

  Trillia felt tears welling up, but she pushed them down and stared happily at the beautiful glass above her.

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