I stagger as I am deposited on the heaving deck of a ship. Daniel grabs my arms to steady me.

  “Whoa, there! Easy.” He says, and then grins. “Ava! You came back!” The air explodes from my lungs as he wraps me in a tight embrace.

  “Daniel— let— go!” I gasp out. He releases me, laughing, and I drag in a breath. I can’t help but grin at him. Stars, I’ve missed him.

  “You came back.” He repeats happily.

  “Of course I did.” I say, arching an eyebrow at him in amusement. “I told you I’d meet you in Tyrhyld. Speaking of which,” I turn to gaze out at the passing coastline and a city that we are rapidly approaching. A pall of smoke rises over the walls and buildings. “I thought you’d already be there by now.”

  “The trials took some time.” The paladin says, sobering and folding his arms. I move to lay a hand on his arm, think better of it, and let my hand drop back to my side.

  “A lot of executions?” I ask sympathetically. He drops his gaze, breathes in deep through his nose and out again.

  “Yeah.” He says. “A lot. Most of Azaes’s soldiers had done despicable things and, well, they faced justice.”

  This time, I do lay my hand on Daniel’s arm. “I’m sorry.” I say softly. He lifts his gaze to mine, and my breath catches at the sight of those sea-blue eyes. He searches my gaze, and smiles slightly.

  “You’ve changed somewhat, Ava.” His smile holds sorrow in it.

  “Yes.” I admit.

  “But you are still fighting.”

  Now it is my turn to drop my gaze. “I… I don’t know what to think or feel, I don’t know what to do, Daniel.” I lift my eyes to his, feeling my despair well up again. “I feel as if I’m drowning.”

  His gaze softens, and my breath hitches again. “I know someone who can help you.” He says.

  “I tried talking to Elhim, Daniel.” I tell him before he can begin speaking about his God. Surprise covers his face. “He didn’t answer.”

  He narrows his eyes at me, and a faint smile tugs at his lips. “You weren’t listening, then.” The paladin says. I narrow my own eyes, lifting my chin.

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well,” Daniel begins, but he is interrupted by Eliana, who climbs out of a hatch in the deck, catches sight of me, and runs over to happily squeeze the life out of me as best as she can.

  “Hello, Eliana.” I gasp. Her embrace is even tighter than Daniel’s was. I look over her shoulder and see Auvanna, the drowling, shyly standing there. Stars, I’d forgotten about Auvanna. Where had she been when I’d left Azmal? Probably testifying against the condemned soldiers.

  I offer the drowling a smile, and she shyly returns it. The fabric of her violet dress crinkles where her fists are clenched around it. Eliana finally releases me, and holds me back from her a little ways. Her eyes search my face with alarming perception, and I have to resist the urge to look away. Eliana’s expression saddens.

  “You poor girl.” She says, and pulls me back into her embrace, albeit gentler this time. I am stunned. What did she see? Can my inner turmoil and struggle be that obvious?

  “It’ll be alright.” Eliana says, and I have to squeeze my eyes shut against sudden tears.

  How dear these people have become to me over the time we have spent together. How closely I know I must guard my heart when I don’t know how the next few days and weeks will play out.

  That alone could tear me apart right now.

  Eliana finally releases me again, and I step away at her and quickly swipe my hand across my eyes. The half-elf turns to Daniel.

  “She tried talking to Elhim.” He says to answer her unspoken question. “She says there was no answer.”

  “Ah.” Eliana clicks her tongue in understanding and sympathy. “Then you weren’t listening, Ava.”

  I chuckle softly. “That’s what Daniel said.”

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  “Daniel is usually right.” Antony says, and I look up to see that he has joined us up in the wind and sun. He stands confidently on the deck, swaying easily with the heaving boards beneath our feet. I haven’t seen him in his natural environment before, I guess. He regards me with the same perceptiveness that Eliana did, and nods once. Then he crosses the few feet between him and Eliana to wrap his arm around her shoulders.

  “What was that supposed to mean?” I ask him, puzzled by his look and nod and then his lack of elaboration.

  “My comrades art right. Thee did not hear Elhim because thee weren’t listening.” He says matter-of-factly.

  I sigh slightly in irritation. “I was listening. He didn’t answer because, well, because—.” I press my lips together against the words that want to escape, and turn on my heel. Stride to the rail and clench my fingers around it. Blink away tears that have no business plaguing me right now. Sea spray splashes up onto my face as I work to corral my tempestuous thoughts.

  After a minute boots clack quietly on the deck boards behind me, and Daniel leans on the rail next to me. He doesn’t look at me, doesn’t acknowledge me in any way, he just stares out at the city that we’re fast approaching. I glance at him, but he seems preoccupied with the wind and scenery. The weight in my heart grows even more heavy.

  And finally, I cannot stand the silence anymore. “What do you mean, I wasn’t listening?” I pitch my voice over the noise of the hissing waves. I hate how vulnerable I sound. “I was listening, Daniel. I was.”

  He turns to look at me, leaning on his elbow against the rail. A stray wave splashes up and soaks his sleeve, but he doesn’t seem to notice or care. He merely gazes at me with kindness and compassion before he speaks.

  “Elhim is everywhere, Ava. And if you speak to Him, He’ll hear. Sometimes He answers in a way we can absolutely know, and sometimes His silence is the answer. If you did speak to Him, then either you didn’t want to hear what He had to say, or He hasn’t called you yet. I suspect it was the former.” He finishes softly. I can’t keep my eyes from welling up with tears.

  “I opened the door, Daniel.” I confess to him. He cocks his head, confused.

  “What door?”

  “The— the one in my mind.” I turn my gaze seaward and continue in a voice made quiet with shame. “The one behind which are all the faces and voices of the people I’ve killed. Every single one.”

  “Ah.” His tone says he understands completely. “What happened when you opened this door?”

  “I was overwhelmed.” I mutter.

  “I see.” He reaches over and squeezes my shoulder sympathetically. I look up into his eyes that seem to reflect both sky and sea.

  “I managed to shut it again, but it’s damaged and so am I; I can’t open it again, Daniel, I can’t!” I confess in a rush. He regards me for a moment with a kindness so profound, I want to shrink away from it. I don’t deserve his kindness.

  “One day,” the paladin says slowly, choosing his words with care, “you will have to open that door again, Ava. You will have to face what you are. You will have to face the knowledge that you cannot be saved by any worldly power. But when that day comes I will be there with you, and I’ll be praying that you’ll know a redeeming performed by the only One who can do such a thing. I promise.” He squeezes my shoulder again.

  “Thank you, Daniel.” I whisper, and then turn my eyes away to gaze at the harbor as we sail into port though the narrow mouth between the cliffs on either side of us.

  Tyrhyld is a fair-sized city, ruled by one particular family of elves for as long as anyone can remember. Nobody would go so far as to say that the current patriarch of this family, Lord Garein, is actually a High Clan Lord, but he’s close enough to. He’s powerful.

  I wonder what relation Antony is to him.

  I am not left to wonder long, however, as two fair-sized ships sail up on either side of us, escorting us into the huge harbor. Their guns are already run out, and I count twenty to a side. A hefty weight for even ships such as these. They could blow us out of the water with nary a thought. Looking around at our own ship, I realize that she’s too small to carry much more than the weight of two guns. We probably don’t even have guns aboard.

  “Ahoy the Mother of Pearl!" Calls a sailor on deck of the ship to our right. Daniel and I look over. Antony stands at the other rail. “Art thou friend or foe?”

  “Friend!” Antony replies, cupping his hands around his mouth in order to be heard across the distance between the two ships. “I am Antarion Galaethor vor Elhim, youngest nephew of Lord Garein Galaethor! He called me home, and I have come!”

  “Antony?!” The sailor cries. His tone is joyful.

  “Hello, cousin.” Antony says, his tone dry but fond. I am stunned.

  Antony has a true elvish name?

  Moreover, Antony has cousins?!

  Something lightly touches my arm, and I look over to see Daniel grinning at me.

  “Not quite what you expected of him, is it?” He says, gently teasing. I shake my head.

  “No, I didn’t expect this at all. I mean, he, well, he’s always been solitary and so… elvish.”

  Daniel laughs. I find myself chuckling despite myself.

  “True, that.” The paladin says. “He’s been a bit estranged from his family for a while, but he’s always been on fairly good terms with them nevertheless.”

  “Why estranged?” I ask, curious. Daniel gives me an unreadable look.

  “That’s something he’ll have to share himself, if he sees fit.”

  “Very well.” I don’t push for answers, instead folding my arms and leaning back comfortably against the rail as I watch us sail all the way into the massive harbor.