"Hello, hello! Did you have a good weekend, my dear colleague?" greets me a warm and cheerful voice as I'm barely stepping off the bus, my legs still numb from the journey.

  "How are you?" chimes in a second voice with the same comforting warmth in its tone, like a soothing balm on this beginning morning.

  These are EUG7NE and K4R1M, my two wonderful colleagues and longtime friends. Just seeing them, their familiar and kind faces, instantly calms me and infuses me with that little dose of energy I so desperately need to face this new day and the week ahead, with all its challenges and surprises.

  "Hi there! I'm so happy to see you!" I exclaim with genuine joy that surprises even myself, my eyes sparkling behind my YEM0.

  "Such enthusiasm!" laughs EUG7NE, shaking his head slightly, "one would almost forget that you nearly got fired last Friday with all that commotion."

  "Yes, it could have been your last day with us, I would have been so distraught if you'd left. How could I bear my days without my favorite colleague and her witty comments!"

  "You still have K4R1M to keep you company, I might point out, with his legendary optimism."

  "Yes, but a trio only works with three, that's its very definition."

  "That's exactly the point," I say, letting out a conspiratorial laugh.

  "And besides," continues EUG7NE with a smirk, "nobody can complain like you do, with that unique blend of intelligence and indignation!"

  "Should I take that as a compliment?" I ask, raising my eyebrows, my YEM0 displaying a skeptical emoji.

  "Yes, yes, of course it's a compliment, and a sincere one at that. I must say, with you, at least we can count on someone who dares to say out loud what everyone else thinks quietly, without pretense or artifice. Nobody else would dare stand up to the boss like you do. It does her good sometimes when you remind her that she doesn't know everything and doesn't hold all the world's truths."

  "Thank you, dear colleague, but you know what would be even nicer? If you too would speak up a bit when something displeases you, from time to time, so that I'm not the only one carrying this burden of dissent."

  "Don't get worked up M1A, you know I could never..."

  "Shh!" K4R1M suddenly exclaims, placing a finger to his lips, his YEM0 abruptly switching to alert red, "the boss is right behind us. If we could avoid another confrontation first thing Monday morning at eight o'clock, I would be eternally grateful. Thank you."

  The traffic light right in front of our office building turns red, leaving us no choice but to be joined by our boss, her silhouette cutting through the morning mist.

  "Good morning," she says to the group in a deliberately neutral voice, even her YEM0 seems to have been programmed to show no particular emotion.

  "Good morning," we respond in chorus, our voices blending in a perfect harmony of subordination.

  "I hope you all enjoyed your weekend, and you in particular, M1A," she continues. But her tone leaves no room for ambiguity: this isn't a question, rather a warning-tinged statement. We had better have had an excellent weekend to be at peak efficiency at work and, in my particular case, to keep my opinions safely locked behind closed lips.

  Without deigning to wait for any response from us, she strides forward and crosses the pedestrian crossing alone with determined steps. We give her a few paces' lead, as she so loves to have - because you understand, she is the boss after all - before heading towards our journalism office ourselves, walking in her wake like well-ordered satellites.

  At the entrance, following the unchanging morning ritual, I validate my presence using the small chip integrated into my suit, that little technological marvel that governs our lives. Only people with this chip in their clothing have the privilege of accessing our building. For others, it's an uphill battle: you need to request authorization from the director in person, and if you're not someone with at least some influence, you might wait an eternity. I've seen unfortunate souls wait dozens of hours hoping for an audience!

  The elevator, true to its reputation, doesn't wait for us, of course. I'm willing to bet my boss deliberately let it go, savoring this petty pleasure of arriving before us. EUG7NE presses the call button with well-practiced resignation.

  "Always so pleasant first thing in the morning, our boss," comments K4R1M, giving me a knowing wink through his YEM0.

  "Yes... I wonder what sauce I'll be cooked in today," I say with an eloquent grimace as the grimy grey elevator doors open before us with an uninviting creak.

  "What investigation are you working on at the moment?" EUG7NE asks me, clearly trying to lighten the atmosphere.

  "The force and paramount importance of choosing the right shampoo for dry and brittle hair," I respond with a sigh of despair that makes my YEM0 tremble.

  "Ah yes... it's to promote the new LUN4 brand shampoo, right?"

  "Exactly... I don't really have a choice, it's my punishment for once again expressing my opinion a bit too frankly."

  "It's certainly not the most exciting subject..."

  "And what's more, it stinks! A real horror! It reeks of petroleum! I don't even dare imagine getting that through my suit. I'm certain the smell would linger for weeks!" I exclaim vehemently, triggering fits of laughter from my two colleagues as the elevator doors finally open onto our floor.

  I've barely had time to settle at my desk and scan my chip to activate my computer when my boss's voice rings out from her lair.

  "M1A, come to my office immediately!"

  Reluctantly, I get up, already feeling the tension rising in my shoulders. Being summoned to her office so early on a Monday morning can only mean one thing: bad news, once again.

  "Sit down and close the door," she orders me. "You've finished the article for the LUN4 brand, I hope?"

  "Yes, of course. I'll send you the final version as soon as I return to my desk. Did you want to see me about that?"

  "Yes and no. If you've finished it, that's perfect. Let's move on to the next thing. This should interest you more, you who loves fieldwork so much." Her voice betrays a certain satisfaction, as if she's already delighting in sending me on a mission outside, away from her eyes and her office. "Out of sight, out of mind," as the saying goes. But she's not wrong on one point: despite the pollution clouds that darken the sky and the stifling heat outside, I'd much rather be in the field than confined between four walls. Besides, my new suit has over eight hours of outdoor autonomy, effectively protecting me from the dangers of polluted air and perfectly regulating my body temperature.

  This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

  "What's the subject? It's been a while since I've done any field investigation."

  "One of our biggest shareholders personally contacted me this morning, for us to conduct a special investigation," she announces with a certain emphasis.

  "A shareholder?" I question, already sensing that this story might smell even worse than the famous LUN4 shampoo.

  "Yes, his cat has mysteriously disappeared for several weeks, and the police categorically refuse to deal with it, considering it's not an emergency by their criteria."

  "How surprising!" I can't help but comment ironically.

  "Ah, please, don't start with your useless remarks!"

  "And you want me to investigate to find this cat and write an article about it?"

  "Exactly!"

  "You're joking, I hope?" I ask, incredulous.

  "No, absolutely not. Work is work, and this article represents a golden opportunity. If we manage to find his cat, our generous shareholder is ready to reward us very generously. With this sum, we'll be financially secure for at least a year, and my promotion will be practically assured."

  "And you chose me for this mission of such vital importance? I'm not sure I'm up to such a responsibility," I say, irony dripping from every syllable.

  "M1A, please, be serious! The newspaper is going through a difficult time, you must realize that. The income isn't what it used to be. And... I know you'll do good work," she adds in an almost inaudible whisper.

  This last phrase, which almost resembles a compliment, takes me completely by surprise. But I know perfectly well that this is precisely why she keeps me on her team: despite my perpetual complaints, I remain her most efficient and fastest journalist.

  "For a mission of such magnitude, which promises to be so lucrative, may I request the help of at least two colleagues?" I try.

  "Yes, exceptionally, I authorize you to work as a team. The sooner this is settled, the better. Who do you want on your team? I'll redistribute their current tasks to others."

  "Two people will be enough: I'll take EUG7NE and K4R1M with me."

  "Alright, but in return, I expect results, and quick results! I want a finished article and a check in due form before the end of the week!"

  "Consider it done, boss!" I exclaim as I dash towards the office of my two beloved colleagues, eager to announce the news that will certainly brighten their day.

  With energetic and hurried steps, I head almost running towards EUG7NE's office, knowing full well that I would most likely find K4R1M somewhere around. And indeed, true to his daily habits, the latter had comfortably settled himself, his steaming coffee cup in hand, on EUG7NE's chair while he was busily sorting through a pile of documents on an adjacent table. They were engrossed in a particularly animated debate when I reached them.

  "…I really don't know K4R1M, I have serious doubts that a former CEO could make a good president. I strongly fear that he'll view our continent solely from the perspective of a large corporation and that he'll implement drastic budget cuts across all sectors. Public service is already so fragile, I dread that these measures might deliver the final blow."

  "For now, he hasn't mentioned anything like that in his speeches. Personally, I think it's an excellent thing to finally have some fresh air against these political dinosaurs completely disconnected from our contemporary reality. They're so out of touch with our times that I doubt they even know the current fare for a simple bus ride. However, when it comes to determining their champagne tolerance threshold, I'm certain they're perfectly aware."

  "You're really pushing it too far! Well, well?" exclaimed EUG7NE, suddenly lifting his head from his mountain of scattered documents to look at me. "What do we owe the honor of your presence here? You'll get reprimanded by the boss again if she finds you away from your post for too long! But since you're here, before you run back to your desk, I'd love to hear your opinion on ADR1EN 2MIANGE's presidential candidacy?"

  "Don't worry, I have her exceptional authorization, I'll explain everything after answering your question. Hmm... it's quite amusing that you ask me this question because I was just meditating on the subject this morning, following the official announcement of his candidacy yesterday, and to be perfectly honest, I remain very divided. Our country desperately needs a fresh breath to revitalize and modernize it, that's undeniable, but is he really the man for the job? With his industrial background, will he truly be able to revitalize our economy or might he instead precipitate its decline? I'm particularly eager to discover his detailed program before forming a definitive opinion. And you two? I have the impression that you share my reservations, EUG7NE?"

  "Indeed, I'm exactly on the same wavelength as you. It's undeniable that our country is going through a particularly difficult period, but I seriously question this man's ability to embody the solution. Some of his speeches seem sometimes excessively aggressive, particularly when addressing our current leaders or economic partners. Like you, I prefer to wait to see his complete program before making a definitive judgment."

  "I perfectly understand your viewpoints, and I want to clarify that I never claimed he held the miracle solution to all our problems. I'm simply saying that his candidacy presents an interesting potential to explore. But well, we'll see how all this evolves. And anyway, tell us, why did you get this exceptional authorization from the boss to come see us? It's rather unusual for her to be so accommodating, particularly towards you."

  "You'll never believe it, but she almost paid me a compliment in her office this morning!"

  "No, that's impossible!"

  "And yet! I'm still taken aback, she whispered, almost imperceptibly, that I was the ideal person to carry out the mission she had just assigned me. By the way, speaking of that, I have two pieces of news to announce to you, one good and one bad. Which one do you want to hear first?"

  "The bad one, of course!" they responded in unison with conviction.

  "I recognize my best colleagues there, always on the same wavelength as me! I too prefer to start with the worst to end on a positive note. So here it is, prepare yourselves: the bad news is that you'll have to put up with me even more intensely than usual because you're officially assigned to work with me on an investigation of vital importance!"

  "And that's what you consider bad news?!" exclaimed K4R1M, visibly amused.

  "One moment," intervened EUG7NE with insight, "I sense she's saving something more substantial for the end."

  "Exactly! I have the immense privilege of announcing that we will be collaborating on a matter of major strategic importance! One of our most eminent shareholders has lost his precious feline, and we are tasked with locating it as quickly as possible! In return, he has committed to making a generous donation to the newspaper, and you know how much we appreciate cash inflows around here!"

  My two colleagues stared at me with the same expression of incredulous stupefaction that I had just worn moments earlier facing the boss.