“You’ve always had a smile on your face. Even during everything, so I would never assume that you…hated the expectations. I just…sort of assumed that someone like you would thrive under them.”

  Raek…didn’t furrow a brow. He didn’t give out a response. He looked at her instead, maybe more in an astonished way. Perfectly said.

  To be fair, he’s never seen it as that. Hard to see yourself with two eyes, but nevermind that. A smile? Raek was no stranger to smiling. But sometimes it was genuine, and sometimes it was…not.

  Fake? No…not ever. A fake smile isn’t necessarily a smile. Maybe a half-smile? Raek’s thoughts became more clouded. He wasn’t sure where he was getting at. Maybe, just maybe some of Raek’s smiles were not true to itself.

  But even then, that gave birth to another question.

  Could anyone see the difference between the two variations of Raek’s smiles? Both genuine and fraudulent?

  He parted his lips, opening his mouth. But closed them. He couldn’t find the words. And the crazier part was the expectations. To say someone like him, Raek, would thrive under them flawlessly is just…

  “To me, you never complained. Never showed any signs of frustration, never had even called yourself the Chosen One not once.” Iris continued, her view turned towards the city now. Perhaps seeing Raek stunned for once was not something she intended behind her words.

  In attempt to perform crowd control, she shortly spoke after.

  “I..that’s not…I mean…” She trailed off. Struggling to find words to explain herself. Her pointed ears twitched again, another wave of embarrassment. She would look with her eyes to steal a glance at Raek every now and then to see if he was still stunned.

  Raek shook his head to snap out of his trance.

  “Don’t stress, I think I know exactly what you mean.” He chuckled after, attempting to lessen her doubts and worries. It proved successful as she exhaled greatly. Ears dropped down after moments of spontaneous twitching.

  “I just think…what I want to obtain in this life…and what I imagine myself I am is…impossible.” Raek begins, now looking at something different. Something past the city, and much more Aethyra. Looking past the city borders, and the country that was on the horizon.

  “Sometimes…I just want to go and reenact Runner’s Journey. Go far, far away. Enter the countryside and build a cabin.”

  Her eyes trail to him yet again, and for once, Iris supposed that Raek wasn’t speaking in any other form. He was being…wholeheatedly. It almost took her off guard for a second.

  The past few moments, she had never taken Raek as the…deep sentimental type. Or maybe just highly philosophical. To Iris, it sounded like a goal. A goal Raek wanted to have amidst all of it.

  But she was going to be honest, she didn’t know too much about the term runner’s journey. Must be a new saying nowadays, she figured. But nonetheless, as a great friend, she’ll strive to help Raek reach his goal.

  “I’ll…help you.”

  Raek widened his eyes, and snapped his head towards the elf. Expecting a laugh, or tracing her words for any mocking tone. But she looked back, her face as serious as ever.

  “Yo-you’ll what…?” His voice cracked, and a slow blush crept upon his face. He started to fidget as Iris repeated herself.

  “I’ll help you! I’ll help you get to the countryside, and build that cabin!”

  “N-no! Not like that!”

  Raek stood up and outstretched his hands to the sitting Iris, who tilted her head in confusion. She didn’t assume she said anything wrong. All she did say was that she would help him. Nothing more, nothing less to her.

  Raek stuttered upon his words, “I-it’s a play…that I watched some time ago! A-and…agh!”

  “What? Raek, you’re blushing deeply. Is it getting hot up here? Here, let me help you take your cloak off.”

  “N-no! I’m good!”

  The sudden cause for panic caught the entire atmosphere, and even the mood that had started to settle off guard. Raek, already flustered and blushing madly from Iris’s proposed statement found only one escape before things had became forcibly awkward from him.

  “I-I think it’s getting a little bit late. I’ll toss in for bed, thanks for everything Iris see ya!”

  Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

  Raek said everything quickly in one breath, and shut the door behind him leading to the watchtower's top. He didn’t look back, he didn't bother. Not that he wanted to anyways. If he could forget everything that had went up there. He would.

  He hurried down the steps, the blush still on his apparent face. He couldn’t believe what she had just proposed still. Out of nowhere? And during a time like this?

  Raek gave out a frustrated sigh, and by the time he reached the bottom floor level, he walked to an adjacent hallway. The barracks.

  There, doors lined up on each side of the hallway. It didn’t take long to find his however, there were only 7, and each door was customized specifically for each Vanguardias.

  He opened his, and shut the door behind him. It was a room tad bit clean, and fairly large for the most reputable mages within Aethyra. However as decorative as it was, or as it tried to be, it never did feel like home for Raek.

  He unlinked his cloak and laid it on his chair. Continuing to sit down on that same chair. Exhaling greatly, he closed his eyes. His mind running back the last moments of the day. Anything that could’ve went wrong, went wrong.

  Not to make it any better that the state he was in currently, was not good. Not the best he considered himself to be in.

  What was he supposed to do? Just act like everything is okay? Today felt like everything was crashing in front of him and he was supposed to rebuild it all back up. That’s almost impossible!

  He opened his eyes which granted his moment of silence to himself. What he needed after a long and draining day.

  Leaning his head back, his mud hair fell back in response. His face in a clear neutral expression that felt…almost out of character for someone like him. But what character is it? What character is he supposed to be?

  Raek Ventus? Or the Chosen One? Alexandria the Great, or just another Vanguardias?

  Anyone else in Aethyra would die to be compared to a Chosen One in terms of impact, influence, or even power. What more could you say for Alexandria? People who weren’t even born around her time still feel as if they could’ve done something.

  To be compared to Alexandria is a feat not many have accomplished, and usually anyone would be overjoyed to hear such…but with Raek, it was so different! Why? Was it that the comparisons tainted his view?

  Or that the comparisons never allowed him to be his own person? He didn’t understand. Everyone else would die to be compared to Alexandria, but for Raek, he would choose to die over being compared with her anyways.

  It’s not like he hated her. Barely even knew her. Only thing that kept them in common conversations was the mark, and the title of the Chosen One.

  Thinking about everything, he couldn’t help but sigh again. “One moment, I spend it fighting against a Great Red Dragon, and the next, I spend it having deep sentimental talks with Iris at the watchtower.”

  He scoffed, almost in a way to mock himself.

  “What has my day…what have I come to? Because, in all honesty, feels like a really…horribly paced play.”

  Looking back at it, he shook his head, quite obvious that he did overreact. But amidst everything, Raek had slightly messed up on his part. Truly letting someone know what goes on in the brain of the Chosen One, much less that Raek was even capable for having basic philosophical conversations.

  Not that he has told many people that he suffers under expectations, or that he hates it when others expect him to match up to said expectations. Or perhaps take a step even further when the citizens of Aethyra look at him differently than anyone else.

  This is not even scratching the surface of what he had to go through with his childhood, however. He could ramble on, and on about that. But alas, nobody thinks the Chosen One suffers with these type of things.

  It was apparent through Iris first when Raek had initially thought that maybe, just maybe some could see some part of it. But no. To everyone, all they see is a smile. That’s all they see, and all they’ll ever see. Raek is to blame for it and no one else.

  If they don’t see the smile on the Chosen One, then that creates problems. Chancellor Lucen made sure to remind him of that multiple times. Not like asking for a therapist would do any good, then others would wonder why the Chosen One needs a therapist.

  That is if Chancellor Lucen wasn’t pretending to be a therapist already.

  All in all, Raek felt stuck. Some days it felt bearable, though. He would maybe endure for weeks at a time. Then just melt down at the Vanguardias Watchtower. All the way at the top, and let his words be carried by the wind to be heard by no one.

  It was his only source of mediation in this city. Raek was sure no one else would understand, and they never tried to. Hell, Clovis has never even referred to him as the Chosen One. Iris as he had just seen assumed it was all rainbows and a pot of gold at the end of it.

  What kind of Chosen One would he be if he had the problems of some middle-aged teenager?

  “Oh.” He gave out, remembering his age. It wasn’t too far from it, but still not an excuse in this day of age.

  He slowed down his thoughts, that his brain almost seemed to run on infinite energy. He took a deep breath, and got up from his chair. Maybe decompressing and slowing down would be the answer.

  Taking off his black top tunic, he threw it somewhere in his open closet and entered the bathroom. Turning the knob for cold water, splashing it onto his face with his hands.

  Going on to look back at the mirror, he saw the same face, still trying to endure. A good’s night rest mattered, that’s what Raek told himself. Of course, he will either be chewed out, or be revered as once against God amongst men per usual.

  A loop? A loop of what he had to go through constantly, over and over again. Sometimes Raek used to think that no one else could go through what he goes through. Maybe the Gods had chosen him specifically.

  For a reason, maybe not for a reason. A to be, or not to be type of thing.

  Maybe it’s not time to compare. The whole thing was never about comparing, was it?

  Raek sighed, and sat on the edge of his bunk.

  A day with the Chosen One, how much would people pay for that?

  Raek scoffed, who knows.