“N-no! This isn’t… We can save you! Please!”

  Cries are heard in the small kitchen as Rei’s hands are painted red from the blood of his lover.

  The man lying in his arms mouths something, but the dark-haired person doesn’t hear him. His thoughts are too occupied with trying to stop the blood flowing out from the other guy’s chest.

  The dying boy slowly reaches one of his own bloody hands up to Rei’s cheek.

  “It’s… fault… really…” The words come out distorted, not sounding like a complete sentence.

  More and more gasps escape Rei’s mouth at his words. This isn’t fair. He’s… He’s so very wrong.

  Suddenly, Rei’s eyes snap open, being welcomed by the darkness. His eyes scan the scenery before him, trying to make sense of why he suddenly isn’t in the kitchen anymore when he finally realises. It was a dream - no, a nightmare. A horrible, horrible nightmare. And the worst thing about it… That scene happened. Slowly sitting up in his bed, he can feel his clothes sticking to his body. He must’ve sweated a lot in his dream. He mounts his legs over the edge of the bed and, as quietly as possible, makes his way to the bathroom. Turning on the light hurts his eyes for a moment, but soon enough, he’s used to it. It’s probably not the best idea to take a shower right now, but he couldn’t care less, he’s sweatier than his roommate after using the gym.

  After showering, the slim boy quickly wraps a towel around his body, stepping onto the mat in front of the shower cabin. Water drips off his body slowly but surely, soaking the rather small fabric under his legs. The young man brushes a hand through his hair, staring at the mirror. His eyes drift over the face reflected in the mirror. The face of a person who developed unhealthy habits over the last months because they lost someone dear. The face of someone who hasn’t been able to properly get anything done. The face of someone who- “Hey, isn’t it too early for you to be up? It’s like 4 in the morning,” a voice, mingled with a big yawn, can be heard behind the bathroom door - hasn’t gotten enough sleep.

  Rei quickly unlocks the door to find no one else than his roommate standing there. The redhead seems to be very tired and is barely awake as he leans on the wall that acts as support, holding his body upright. “Sorry, Nao. I just-” the brown-haired boy starts but his roommate- Nao - cuts him off. “It’s all good, man. I was just worried. Did you have one of those nightmares again? I heard you writhing around in bed.”

  He knows, obviously. Not like Rei let him exclusively know, it just kind of happened. “Do you wanna go back to sleep or would you rather go downstairs to grab a coffee?” Nao then asks, trying his best not to fall asleep while standing. Rei lets out a small sigh before turning the bathroom light off and walking up to his bed. “It would be nice to sleep, you know. But I seriously can’t. It’s just- I don’t know.”

  “I get it, man,” Nao has managed to find his way back to his own bed in the dark as well. “But you should like seriously get some sleep. The exams are tomorrow, wouldn’t wanna miss out on the chance of getting into this school, huh? Imagine you just fell asleep while taking the test. That would probably suck suuuuper bad.”

  With a hum, Rei nods. It would be very unfortunate if he didn’t manage to get into his dream school. He opens his mouth to say something in response but notices Nao is already asleep, half the way out of his bed. “Gosh, you’re seriously going to injure yourself if you keep sleeping in those weird positions,” he mutters before quickly lifting him to his bed so there wouldn’t be as big a chance of him falling as there was a moment ago.

  After sitting there for a bit, staring at his roommate peacefully sleeping, chest raising up and down with every slow breath he takes, he decides to put on some clothes. Perhaps he should try to sleep at the very least. Nao was right; he seriously needs to pick himself up if he wants to finally get into this school. Honestly, he should be glad that he even has a chance, usually, they don’t want to accept second-year students there but thanks to Nao’s good negotiating skills, he at least gets to take the exam. It’s supposedly just to test what class he gets into but if he fails, and gets under 50%, he won’t even be accepted. That can’t happen though. He won’t let something like that happen. The redhead has done so much for him, he can’t just let that opportunity go to waste.

  A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

  Quickly changing into another pair of pyjamas, he lies back down on his bed, snuggling under the rather heavy blanket. He turns around a lot, eyes closed, trying to find a comfortable position so that he can sleep, but to no avail. All he manages to do by moving around this much is keep himself up.

  In the end, he just stares at the ceiling. This isn’t the first night he finds himself mindlessly staring at the white scene. It has happened a lot since he moved in after getting through the 1st year of high school. Nao was nice enough to let him in if he paid half of the rent, his old roommate was kicked out of the school, so the whole apartment was left for him to pay at that time.

  Rei is glad that the redhead even thought about letting him live with him. He knows exactly what happened last year, yet he still treats him like he treats others, like he is still one of his closest friends. This isn’t fair. He should look at him the way others who know about the incident do. He really doesn’t deserve Nao. Rei rolls over to his side, looking at the redheaded boy who has now managed to start snoring lightly.

  A small, faint smile finds its way to the brunet’s face before vanishing again. He looks adorable while sleeping. Like a little, helpless kid. The same way that Otoko looked… He shakes his head quickly, no. He shouldn’t think about him any more than he already does. He’s in the past, never coming back. It won’t happen again; he won’t make the same mistake twice. But it’s not like he can help it. He misses Otoko a lot.

  “You can’t sleep? Seriously?” he then hears a mutter, and his eyes widen as they meet the maroon ones of his roommate. “Yeah, I’ve been trying but nothing has worked out,” he whispers back.

  With a groan, Nao forces himself to sit up. “Come, let’s get dressed and grab some coffee downstairs. No harm in going there so early… It’s five already, huh?” he says after stealing a glance at the watch on his wrist. “Aren’t they still closed, though? I mean, it’s still completely dark, and don’t they open at six?” Rei then asks, also sitting up and grabbing his jeans from the ground. Yesterday, he had not cared enough to fold them up and put them away somewhere. He quickly changes out of his pyjama pants and pulls the jeans on, completely ignoring the flustered face of the redhead. Even when it’s dark, this guy can see pretty well. And it’s not every day he can see a hot man changing clothes in front of him. But without paying it too much mind, he also changes out from his sleepwear into some casual jeans and shirt. He pulls a dark sweater over the shirt and makes sure the collar is looking right before putting on his shoes. He turns on the light in the hall to see at least something in this darkness and then glances behind him for a second only to see Rei still getting ready. He struggles with finding his hoodie, it seems. “It’s in the washing machine, I put it there yesterday. Today, you can wear something else,” Nao chuckles a little, waiting by the door.

  Grumbling something, the brunet finally finds a leather jacket from the small wardrobe. “Okay, let’s just go, it’s getting hot in here,” he then mutters, quickly putting on his sneakers and leaving the small apartment after his friend.

  Nao locks the door quickly before hurrying after the rushing Rei. He really wants his coffee, huh? “Wait for me! Did you even take your money!?” Nao whisper-shouts after him, not wanting to wake any neighbors up with his voice.

  “Yeah, I’ve got my wallet. I just want to get to the vending machine before it’s completely empty of the mint coffee, you know,” Rei explains, showing his wallet that he pulled out from his pocket, not stopping for a second.

  Even though it’s Nao who frequently visits the gym, Rei is still a lot faster than him. That’s some talent there. He has never really liked sports but rather stayed inside, reading and drawing. It seems that he likes drawing manga, from what Nao has managed to see. Rei hides his stuff pretty well, and it’s not like the redhead is the kind of person to look through others’ things without their permission.

  When both of the guys are finally downstairs, Rei doesn’t miss a second and pushes the money into the vending machine, getting his beloved mint coffee. “You want something too, Nao?” he then asks, already pushing in some more coins and receiving an espresso. It’s not the highest quality but it’s not the worst either.

  He hands the redhead the bottle of coffee before sitting down on a nearby bench. Could they go back inside? Yes. But why bother? It’s not freezing outside; the morning wind is quite warm today, it must be from the south.

  Nao settles down next to him, sipping his coffee with small sips. They manage to keep it quite warm by some miracle.

  “Are you ready for the test and interview?” he asks his roommate, turning towards him. “It’s not too difficult, I’m sure you can make it. I hope you’ll be in the same class as me, that would be fun. We could sit next to each other and stuff.”

  Rei nods. “That’d be nice-” his voice suddenly gets stuck in his throat though, as his eyes spot a familiar figure. He just stares at them with big eyes, not believing what he’s seeing.

  That’s Otoko.