The hospital room was steeped in a silence that felt unbearably heavy, broken only by the rhythmic yet ominous beeping of the heart monitor. The cold ceiling light illuminated the space, casting stark shadows over a scene of despair. Shin Takami stood by the bedside, his fists clenched so tightly that his knuckles had turned white. His eyes glistened with unshed tears, but he fought them back, as if crying would be an admission of defeat.

  On the bed, his mother appeared frail, almost unrecognizable. The strong woman who had once cradled him to sleep with bedtime stories was now just a shadow, her pale skin and cracked lips evidence of her struggle. Every breath she took was a battle, a faint sound that sliced through the silence like an invisible blade.

  — It’s my fault… — Shin murmured, his voice barely audible in the heavy air.

  His mother’s eyes fluttered open slowly. Even in her weakened state, she managed a faint smile, a gesture that was both comforting and piercing to Shin.

  — Don’t say that… — Her voice was fragile, barely a whisper. — I love you.

  The words were simple but devastating. Shin’s chest tightened as if a crushing weight was pressing down on him. He leaned closer, reaching out to take her hand, but her fingers were cold and lifeless, unable to return his touch.

  Before he could say anything else, the door to the room burst open with a loud bang, slamming against the wall. Ryuuji Takami stormed in, his eyes red-rimmed, though his grief was overshadowed by the fury radiating from him.

  — Get out of here… — he growled, his voice thunderous and accusatory as he pointed a finger toward the door. — You don’t deserve to be here!

  Shin stumbled back, each word hitting him like a physical blow.

  — Dad… I didn’t… I… — His voice faltered, a hollow echo of his breaking heart.

  Before he could defend himself, a continuous sound echoed through the room. The beeping of the monitors ceased, replaced by a single, unending tone.

  Ryuuji froze for a moment, but then threw himself at the bed, clutching his wife’s lifeless body.

  — No… NO! — he screamed, his raw and irrepressible anguish filling the room.

  Ryuuji turned to Shin, his face twisted with hatred and pain.

  — Is this what you wanted? This is your fault! Your damn fault! You’re not my son! You’re a curse!

  Shin, his eyes wide and heart shattered, stepped back, then again, until he tripped over the doorframe. There wasn’t enough air in the world to fill his lungs. He turned and ran, the sound of his father’s sobs still echoing in his mind like a curse.

  Out in the hallway, he leaned against the cold wall and covered his face with his hands. The tears he had held back now fell in torrents, accompanied by sobs he could no longer suppress.

  “Why… wasn’t it me?” he thought, repeating the phrase like a torturous mantra.

  His vision blurred as his feet carried him automatically out of the hospital. Each step felt heavier, but he couldn’t stop. The weight of guilt dragged him down, yet he kept moving.

  The hospital corridors seemed narrow and suffocating as Shin walked, each step heavier than the last. His eyes were glassy with tears, but he wouldn’t let them fall. Not here. Not while the guilt and Ryuuji’s words echoed in his mind like relentless hammer blows.

  “It’s your fault… Your damn fault!”

  Those words cut through his soul like blades, intertwining with the continuous sound of the heart monitor that still haunted his ears, now like a ghostly lament. His hands trembled, but he kept them clenched into fists, as if that was the only control he had left.

  Shin left the room, his steps hurried and chaotic, and ran down the corridor, ignoring the nurses calling after him or the curious gazes of other visitors. Everyone around him seemed distant, like shadows in a world that no longer made sense. The suffocating feeling was almost tangible, and the air seemed to escape his lungs with each failed attempt to breathe.

  He found the emergency exit and pushed the door open with force. The cold rain greeted him outside, drenching his hair and clothes instantly. But he didn’t care. Nothing mattered. The sky was heavy with dark clouds, reflecting the state of his soul.

  Each step he took through the deserted streets felt like the weight of reality was crushing him. The cold rain mixed with the warm tears that finally began to fall, and he made no effort to wipe them away. His feet moved automatically, guided only by the need to escape—from the hospital, from Ryuuji’s voice, from the memory of his mother’s weak smile that now felt like a final goodbye.

  Passing by brightly lit shop windows and nearly empty streets, he could hear the muffled laughter of families inside their homes. Every sound, every glimpse of normalcy was a cruel reminder of what he had lost. He pulled his coat tighter around him, but it wasn’t the cold that made him tremble—it was the pain, the guilt, and the suffocating sense that there was no place for him in this world anymore.

  When he reached a bridge, his steps finally slowed. The sound of the flowing water below echoed in his ears like a silent invitation. He stopped in the middle of the bridge and looked down at the dark river. The rain created ripples on the surface, but even so, he could see his distorted reflection in the water.

  — I’m a monster… — he whispered, his hoarse voice almost inaudible against the rain.

  He climbed onto the bridge’s railing with unsettling ease, balancing precariously as he stared into the void below. The cold wind cut through his skin, but he barely felt it. All that remained was the crushing weight in his chest.

  Shin leaned forward, closing his eyes.

  — Forgive me, Mom… — he murmured, letting the tears fall freely.

  And then, he jumped.

  The water’s surface felt like a liquid grave, cold and unyielding, as the girl watched the body of a stranger being carried away by the current. The initial shock quickly gave way to an overwhelming impulse. Without a second thought, she kicked off her shoes and dove in. The icy water struck her skin, making every movement a challenge, but she ignored the cold and the pain.

  The stranger was like dead weight, floating at the mercy of the current. The girl swam with all her strength, the waves crashing against her as if trying to push her away. When she finally reached him, she grabbed his arm, pulling him with a determination she didn’t even know she had.

  — Wake up, please! — she yelled at him, even though she knew he wouldn’t hear her.

  Each stroke toward the shore felt like a battle. Her chest burned, her muscles screamed for rest, but she didn’t stop.

  When they finally reached the sand, she fell to her knees beside him, her arms trembling from exhaustion.

  His face was pale, his lips blue. The silence was deafening. Without hesitation, she placed her hands on his chest and began pressing, her movements firm but uncertain.

  "Come on, breathe!" she shouted, her voice breaking with desperation.

  Nothing happened. A lump began to form in her throat. She pressed again, harder this time.

  "Breathe!" she pleaded, her eyes welling up with tears.

  Suddenly, he gasped, coughing up water as his lungs desperately sought air. He coughed and wheezed like someone being brought back to life.

  "You're alive..." she murmured, relieved, but her relief quickly turned to anger. "Are you drunk?! You idiot!"

  The boy opened his eyes with difficulty, blinking against the faint light of the stars. He looked confused, lost, as if he didn’t know where he was.

  "Who... do you think you are?" he asked, his voice weak and hesitant.

  "It doesn’t matter who! I saved you, you moron!" she snapped, her voice full of frustration.

  He averted his gaze, tears beginning to streak down his face.

  "You shouldn’t have saved me... I didn’t ask for your help," he murmured.

  Her eyes widened in disbelief.

  "What?"

  He sat up slowly, his shoulders slumped as if carrying the weight of the world.

  "I said I didn’t ask for your help... I shouldn’t even be alive."

  His words felt like a punch to the stomach.

  "You’d be dead if I hadn’t helped!" she retorted, her voice sharp. "I risked my life to save you, and you’re mad about it?!"

  He laughed, but it was a hollow, almost cruel sound.

  "You don’t understand a damn thing."

  "Then make me understand!" she demanded, her fists clenched.

  He was silent for a moment before finally replying, his voice low and broken:

  "Fine, but I’m only saying it because I want to... I’m the reason my mom is dead."

  The confession hung in the air, heavy like an anchor.

  "What do you mean...?" she asked, her anger giving way to confusion.

  He swallowed hard, his words coming out with difficulty.

  "Covid. I was asymptomatic. She caught it from me... and she didn’t make it."

  She froze, shock written all over her face.

  "That’s not a reason to give up on life..." she started, but he cut her off.

  "I killed the only person who loved me unconditionally." He laughed again, even more bitterly this time. "How the hell is that not a reason? Let’s see how you’d feel if you were in my shoes."

  She didn’t know how to respond. His words were like knives, each one cutting deeper than the last.

  "I... I don’t know what I’d do," she admitted, her voice trembling, but she didn’t look away. "But I know dying won’t fix anything."

  He stood up unsteadily, avoiding her gaze.

  "You shouldn’t have risked yourself for trash... like me, idiot!"

  She crossed her arms, trying to hide the trembling in her hands.

  "Maybe I shouldn’t have. But it’s done now; it’s in the past."

  He stopped, staring at the horizon for a long moment.

  "Shit, where am I supposed to live now..." he admitted, his voice barely audible.

  She hesitated before replying, carefully choosing her words.

  "Go to the hospital. You need to take care of yourself."

  He laughed again, but this time it sounded more tired than bitter.

  "Not a chance."

  She watched him start walking slowly down the sand, aimlessly. For a moment, she thought about letting him go, but something inside her wouldn’t allow it.

  "I’m coming with you," she said simply, her steps following his.

  He didn’t respond, but he also didn’t stop her. As they walked together through the cold night, the girl felt that, somehow, both of them were trying to find a way back to the light.

  ---

  In the hospital waiting room, the silence felt as cold as the air conditioning. The girl sat in a stiff chair, hugging her arms to try and fend off the lingering chill from the river. Takami, on the other hand, slouched in the chair next to her, his expression closed and irritated.

  "This is total bullshit..." he muttered, staring at the fluorescent lights on the ceiling.

  She glanced at him sideways, trying not to show the irritation that grew with every word he spoke.

  "Could you at least try to be less unpleasant?"

  He scoffed, turning his face toward her.

  "Are you serious? I didn’t ask you to save me, and now I’m stuck here in this shitty hospital, all screwed up."

  "Are you kidding me right now?" She turned fully toward him, crossing her arms. "If I hadn’t done anything, you’d be dead right now."

  "So what? That wouldn’t be your problem, would it?" he challenged, his eyes burning with frustration.

  She let out a deep sigh, shaking her head.

  "My God, you’re insufferable. I should’ve left you in that river."

  "Then why didn’t you?" he shot back, leaning slightly forward. "What kind of idiot jumps into a river to save a stranger?"

  "Maybe the kind of person who can’t just watch someone die without doing anything." Her voice was firm, but there was a slight hesitation, as if she was starting to doubt herself.

  He stared at her for a moment before letting out a bitter laugh.

  — Big deal. Look where that got us.

  Before she could respond, a nurse appeared at the door, drawing both their attention.

  — Both of you need to get a quick check-up. We'll start with you. — She pointed at Takami.

  — "You"? — He rolled his eyes, struggling to stand up. — My name is Takami. And you? — he asked, turning to the girl with a curious yet challenging look.

  She hesitated for a moment before responding.

  — Kisaragi.

  He let out a short, sarcastic laugh.

  — Kisaragi-san, huh? Nice. Now I know the name of the person who ruined my plan to die tonight...

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  — You're ungrateful, Takami-san, — she retorted, irritated. — Maybe next time I'll think twice before saving a jerk like you.

  He opened his mouth to respond but was interrupted by the nurse.

  — Please, stop it. The doctor will see you now.

  He muttered "whatever" as he followed the nurse, leaving Kisaragi alone for a moment. She sighed, sinking into the chair and massaging her temples.

  — What a mess... — she murmured to herself before looking at the door where he had left. As insufferable as he was, something about the way he spoke, the pain evident in every word, made it impossible for her to simply walk away.

  When he returned from the consultation a few minutes later, he looked even more defeated.

  — Well, you're alive, — she said, trying to break the silence.

  — Unfortunately, — he replied, throwing himself back into the chair beside her.

  — Okay, Takami-san. I'll only ask this once. — Kisaragi turned to him, her eyes serious. — What made you want to end your life?

  He looked at her, surprised by the direct question, and then looked away.

  — It's none of your business.

  — Maybe not, — she admitted, leaning forward. — But if I'm going to keep carrying your weight, I think I deserve to know the whole story.

  He let out a heavy sigh, running a hand through his wet hair.

  — You won't stop, will you?

  — Nope.

  — Fine, damn it... — He looked at her again, his dark eyes full of something she couldn't quite decipher. — I killed my mom. Isn't that enough for you?

  The confession caught her off guard.

  — What? You already said most of this, though...

  — I passed that damn illness to her, alright? — he spat the words like venom. — It was all my fault, whether you agree or not. And honestly, I don't give a damn what you think.

  Kisaragi remained silent for a moment, trying to process what she'd just heard.

  — You didn't know... Stop being ridiculous; it wasn't your fault. — she started, but he interrupted her.

  — It doesn't matter. It was because of me. She died because of my negligence. So screw it—I'm the one to blame.

  She looked at him, her gaze serious, but her voice came out surprisingly calm.

  — You're not the only one who's made mistakes in the world, you know?

  He furrowed his brow, confused by her response.

  — What's that supposed to mean? Do you know anyone else who killed their mother by accident?

  — I give up. — Kisaragi stood up, pulling the strap of her soaked bag over her shoulder. — Now, find a way to live with it because I didn't risk my life for nothing.

  He watched her leave the room without saying another word, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

  ---

  The metallic sound of a lock turning echoed through the hallway as Shin Takami inserted the key into the door of his new apartment. He took a deep breath, trying to convince himself this was just the beginning of something new. However, his hands trembled slightly.

  — Damn... This is harder than I thought, — he muttered to himself, staring at the stacked boxes beside him.

  As he was about to open the door, a female voice echoed from the hallway.

  — Of course, I'll welcome my new neighbor! — said the voice, probably on the phone.

  Shin raised an eyebrow and looked to the side. The door of the apartment next to his burst open with enough force to almost startle him. A girl stepped out, still holding her phone, laughing at something the person on the other end had said.

  — Okay, okay, I'll call you later. — She ended the call with a carefree smile.

  For a moment, Shin just watched her. She seemed full of energy, the kind of person who lit up a room. But as soon as she looked at him, her expression froze. And so did his.

  — Oh, for fuck's sake... — Shin muttered, his legs weakening. He stumbled and fell to his knees, dropping the key.

  The girl widened her eyes, clearly startled.

  — What?! Hey, are you okay? — She stepped forward, her voice full of concern.

  Shin raised his head, looking at her as if he were seeing a ghost.

  — Is it... you? — he asked, his voice trembling.

  She frowned, confused.

  — Huh? What are you talking about?

  — Holy shit... It really is you... — He stood up slowly, still trying to process the scene.

  She crossed her arms, now more suspicious than concerned.

  — Are you mistaking me for someone?

  Shin took a step closer, his eyes fixed on her.

  — Do you know anyone named Takami?

  She blinked a few times, clearly trying to understand what he meant, until her expression changed.

  – You're the lunatic from the bridge!

  Shin let out a nervous laugh, running a hand over his face.

  – So, you remember… Shit, I thought I’d never see you again.

  She smiled, still in disbelief.

  – And you’re here… in the apartment next door? Are you stalking me?

  He laughed, shaking his head.

  – Stalking you? Not a chance. This is one hell of a coincidence.

  She narrowed her eyes, though a playful smile tugged at her lips.

  – A coincidence, huh? Sure...

  – I swear! – He raised his hands as if surrendering. – I’m not crazy enough to go around stalking people.

  – I don’t know, Takami-kun. You seemed pretty crazy that day.

  – Hey, I was desperate, okay? Cut me some slack.

  – Sure, sure. – She smiled, but before she could say more, he stepped forward and pulled her into a tight hug.

  – What the hell is this? – She tried to push him away, but not too forcefully.

  – Shut up and let me enjoy the moment.

  She huffed but eventually relaxed, patting his back lightly.

  – You’re such a pervert, you know that?

  – And you’re the girl who saved my life. I think we’re even.

  She laughed but soon gave him a light shove.

  – Okay, that’s enough. Let go before someone sees us and thinks we’re dating or something.

  – Fine, don’t be so uptight. – He released her, laughing. – But don’t complain. It was just a hug.

  She crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes.

  – So, what are you doing here? Why are you in Tokyo?

  Shin sighed, the smile fading from his face.

  – My old man kicked me out here. Said it was “better for me” or some crap like that.

  She raised an eyebrow.

  – Better for you? And he stayed where?

  – He’s back in his huge-ass house, living it up. – He shrugged. – To him, I’m just a murderer with his blood in my veins.

  She grimaced, clearly uncomfortable.

  – That’s rough.

  – Yeah, no kidding. But forget about that. – He looked at her for a moment, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. – You’re different.

  She blinked, surprised by the shift in the conversation.

  – Of course I’m different. It’s been two years, idiot.

  – You're more... I don’t know. Mature... you definitely turned into a D.

  She blushed but tried to hide her face by turning to the side.

  – Stop talking nonsense.

  – I'm serious. – He studied her a bit more. – But you still have the same bangs.

  – It's practical.

  He laughed, shaking his head.

  – Haha! You haven’t changed at all, how is that thing practical?

  She said, still looking at him from the side.

  – And you still have a dirty mouth.

  Shin smiled, this time a genuine smile.

  – I guess that’s why we match, huh?

  She laughed, shaking her head.

  – No way, Takami-kun.

  The two laughed, and the hallway that had once seemed cold now felt a little more welcoming.

  After closing the door, Shin leaned against it, letting his body slide down to the floor. He sighed deeply, trying to digest everything that had just happened.

  – Shit, what a mess. – He muttered, rubbing his face with his hands.

  Outside, he heard the sound of Noa's door closing. Finally, she seemed to have given up. At least for now.

  – Thank God. – He murmured, resting his elbows on his knees and burying his face in his hands.

  The guilt that had been haunting him for two years hit him like a punch to the stomach. He tried to push the thoughts away, but they came with force.

  – I can’t be friends with her. – He thought, clenching his fists. – She saved a life, mine. And I... I took the life of the only person who mattered to me.

  He breathed deeply, trying to control the storm inside of him.

  After grabbing the remaining boxes and organizing the apartment, Shin realized his stomach was growling so loudly it seemed like a protest. He opened the cabinets and the fridge, finding a desolate scene: absolutely nothing.

  – Oh, for God's sake... I forgot to buy food. – He muttered, kicking one of the empty boxes. He looked at the clock and saw it was already past 8 p.m.

  – Great, Takami, time to go out again. This life’s a mess. – He said to himself as he grabbed a jacket.

  The night air was cold, but Shin didn’t care. With his hands in his pockets, he walked toward the convenience store, trying to ignore the irritating feeling of being watched.

  – What the hell is this now? – He thought, quickening his pace.

  When he turned the corner, he saw Noa taking out the trash.

  – Oh, no... – He froze in place, mentally cursing the entire universe.

  – Seriously? Right now? – He murmured, looking away and trying to pass without being noticed.

  But, of course, she saw him.

  – Takami-kun! – She called with a smile, her voice loud enough to make his heart sink.

  Shin closed his eyes and took a deep breath before slowly turning around.

  – What now? – He asked, trying to sound indifferent, but the irritation in his voice was clear.

  – Can we be friends or not? – She asked directly, crossing her arms and looking at him like it was a matter of life or death.

  He blinked a few times, trying to process the question.

  – No. – The answer came so quickly he almost laughed at his own reaction.

  – Why not?! – Noa shot back, her tone now louder and more impatient.

  Shin ran a hand through his hair, sighing.

  – Because it’s not possible, damn it!

  – It is! – She insisted, stomping her foot on the ground like a child throwing a tantrum.

  He rolled his eyes and turned his back on her.

  – I’m not in the mood to argue. Good night.

  – Hey! Come back here! – She shouted, but he was already walking too fast to hear anything else.

  Shin entered the store and grabbed the basics: bread, instant noodles, and water. Everything in the "broke student survival" style. As he placed the items on the counter, the cashier, a cheerful girl, looked at him curiously.

  – Are you okay? – She asked while scanning the items.

  Shin raised an eyebrow.

  – It’s obvious I’m not, right? But thanks for asking.

  She laughed, surprised by his honesty.

  – Fine, I just wanted to be polite. You look like crap, that's all.

  He let out a short laugh, handing over the money.

  – It's the effect of living alone for the first time. I wouldn’t recommend trying it.

  The girl shrugged, handing him the change.

  – Good luck with that, then.

  – Thanks. I’ll need it. – He grabbed the bags and walked out, shaking his head.

  When he got to the building, Shin saw Noa again. She was standing in front of his door, arms crossed.

  – Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me. – He muttered quietly before approaching her.

  – What are you doing here? – He asked, furrowing his brow.

  – I wanted to make sure you’d come back alive. – She replied with the same casual tone as if talking about the weather.

  Shin scoffed, rubbing his face.

  – Are you crazy? I just went to buy food, I didn’t go to war.

  – Who knows, right? With that face of yours, you look like someone who attracts trouble...

  He laughed lightly but quickly tried to get back to a serious tone.

  – You’ve done enough, Kisaragi.

  – No, I haven’t.

  – Yes, you have. – He insisted, staring her in the eyes.

  – No, I haven’t. – She countered without hesitation.

  Shin took a deep breath, clearly exasperated.

  – Why do you insist so much, huh? What the hell.

  She looked at him with a mix of frustration and stubbornness.

  – Because it’s obvious you’re sinking on your own.

  – And what does that have to do with you?! – He snapped, raising his voice.

  – I have everything to do with it because I want to, damn it! – She replied in the same tone, making him take a step back.

  They both fell silent for a moment. Shin looked away, finally giving in a little.

  – Fine... tell me something.

  – What?

  – What’s your full name?

  She raised an eyebrow, surprised by the sudden question.

  – Noa Kisaragi.

  – Kisaragi... – He repeated, shaking his head. – Nice name.

  – Thanks.

  Shin looked at Noa after a few seconds of silence, still processing all the confusion she had caused. With a resigned sigh, he decided to change the subject, just to shift the focus.

  – Okay, but where do you study?

  Noa raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised by the question.

  – Why do you want to know?

  – Curiosity. – He shrugged. – And, I don’t know, maybe I’m trying to be less of an asshole for a moment.

  She laughed lightly but answered firmly:

  – Kaykei University.

  Shin froze for a second, staring at her as if she had just said something ridiculous.

  – No... that’s not possible.

  – What? – She crossed her arms, intrigued.

  – I’m going to Kaykei too.

  – Really? – Noa seemed genuinely surprised. – That’s quite the coincidence...

  Shin scoffed, shaking his head.

  – Coincidence my ass. My dad sent me there because a friend of mine, Hamada, already studies there. It was the perfect excuse for him not to bother looking for another university.

  – Hamada... – She tilted her head. – Sounds like a smart guy, unlike you.

  – Not as much as he thinks he is. – Shin retorted, rolling his eyes. – But anyway, does this mean we’re going to be classmates, or worse... crossing paths on campus?

  Noa smiled, clearly finding the situation amusing.

  – Looks like fate is forcing us to be friends.

  – Fate? – He let out a dry laugh. – This is more like a punishment.

  She pretended to be offended, but the mischievous expression on her face didn’t disappear.

  – You better get used to it. Now you have no way out.

  Shin sighed, exasperated.

  – This is a nightmare.

  – For you, maybe. For me, it’s just the beginning of a fun game.

  – Of course it is... – He murmured, rubbing his face. – Fine, but don’t even think about dragging me into those crazy talks at college.

  – Oh? Really? – Noa said with a mischievous smile.

  – I knew you’d be a problem...

  – And you think so? – She responded with a teasing tone.

  He looked at her, unsure of what exactly to say.

  – We’re going to see each other at college, right?

  He responded, dissatisfied.

  – Looks like it.

  – Alright. – He sighed. – Just don’t annoy me too much, okay? Good night.

  She laughed, taking a step back.

  – I’ll try.

  – Good night, stalker. – She replied with a sly smile.

  As she entered the apartment, Shin couldn’t help but smile.