012 Philosopher’s Stone

  Skully didn’t waste any time. The moment we were settled, he began to debrief me about the Philosopher’s Stone.

  “It’s not just a fancy magical artifact,” he expined, pacing the length of the room like some undead professor about to drop a major history lesson. “To create a Philosopher’s Stone, you need a… particurly specific ingredient.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “And what’s that?”

  Skully paused, gave me a long look, and then said, very matter-of-factly, “Human sacrifice.”

  There was a beat of silence as I let that sink in. You’d think I’d be horrified—and yeah, on some level, I guess I was—but strangely, I wasn’t as affected as I thought I’d be. Maybe it was because I’d been dead long enough that things like “human sacrifice” didn’t hit me the way they might’ve when I was alive. Or maybe I’d just grown numb to Skully dropping this kind of casual necromantic bombshell on me.

  “Huh,” I said, trying to sound neutral. “That’s… grim.”

  “Very,” Skully agreed. “Back during the war, it was easy to make them. Plenty of human souls, plenty of chaos… But now, with peace in pce, the creation of Philosopher’s Stones has been strictly controlled. Supplies are dwindling, and those that remain are guarded closely by the Clergy.”

  “So you’re running out,” I guessed.

  “Exactly,” Skully said, stopping his pacing to face me. “My research on certain… projects has slowed to a crawl because I no longer have enough Philosopher’s Stones to fuel my experiments. Which is why we’re here. I need to procure more.”

  I frowned. “Okay, but why Rague City specifically? There must be other pces with less security.”

  Skully sighed, as if he were expining something to a particurly slow student. “Because I happen to have a cim to the Philosopher’s Stones stored here. Remember? I loaned them to the Clergy ages ago as part of the peace treaty. Technically, they’re still mine. I just need to retrieve them without drawing too much attention.”

  “Right…” I nodded slowly, then narrowed my eyes at him. “And this isn’t going to involve hurting any innocents, right? Because I’m not down for that. If it does, I’m out.”

  Skully tilted his head, looking at me like I was some kind of fascinating anomaly. “You’re a strange ghost,” he said, almost thoughtfully. “Most spirits don’t know the meaning of reluctance. They sughter without thought, driven by the degradation of their souls. But you… you’re different.”

  I crossed my arms. “Yeah, well, most ghosts don’t have to deal with the afterlife’s version of Driver’s Ed. We don’t all lose our marbles right away.”

  “Driver’s Ed? You always say strange things,” Skully chuckled, a dry, rattling sound. “You know more about these matters than I would’ve expected. I would’ve pegged you as a necromancer if it weren’t for your severe ck of magical aptitude.”

  “Hey, I’ll have you know I’ve been trying to learn magic,” I protested. “It’s not my fault I’ve got that whole anti-mana thing messing me up.”

  “Yes, yes,” Skully said, waving a hand dismissively. “Regardless, you are not a necromancer. But you are knowledgeable, which makes you… an intriguing puzzle.”

  “Gd to keep you on your toes, Professor Boneface.”

  He rolled his fming eye sockets and turned back to the glowing map. “Now, let’s focus. If we’re going to pull this off, you’ll need to understand exactly what we’re up against…”

  “So, what’s the pn?” I asked, leaning against the rickety table in our rented room. The air smelled faintly of mildew and old wood, but at least it wasn’t crawling with rats. Small mercies.

  Skully crossed his bony arms and stared at me, the flickering fmes in his eye sockets dimming slightly as he contempted his response. “The wards in that armor of yours should be enough to obscure your ghostly… condition. At least for a while.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Okay… and?”

  “And,” he continued, “since sneaking around in clunky bck armor isn’t exactly the most subtle option, you’ll need to occupy a body.”

  I blinked. “Wait. What?”

  “A body,” Skully repeated, like it was the most obvious solution in the world. “You know, flesh, bones, mobility—basic stuff.”

  I shook my head, backing up a step. “No, no, no. Absolutely not. I’m not stepping into some poor soul’s body and hijacking their free will. That’s messed up.”

  Skully sighed and rubbed his skeletal face. “Your moral compass,” he muttered, “can go and fuck itself.”

  “Hey, I’m serious!” I snapped. “I’ve got standards, okay? I’m not about to turn into some creepy possession ghost.”

  He exhaled—or at least made the sound of exhaling, which was impressive for someone without lungs—and gave me a long, weary look. “Fine,” he said, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “Do whatever you like. Sneak around in the armor. Wobble through the streets. Get yourself caught and see how far that gets you. Maybe, if you’re lucky, the Rague mages will kill you and do my job for me.”

  I crossed my arms, waiting. Because I knew Skully wasn’t finished. He had that look—or, well, vibe—he got when he was conflicted about something. Like he wanted to say more but didn’t want to give me the satisfaction of knowing he cared.

  Sure enough, after a few seconds of tense silence, he sighed again and added, “If they can’t kill you, though, they’ll probably seal you.”

  “Seal me?” I repeated, feeling a cold chill run through me. And no, that wasn’t just my usual ghostly aura acting up. “Like, forever?”

  “Possibly,” Skully said. “That’s what they do to beings they can’t destroy. Demigods, ancient spirits, things that go bump in the night… They sp a seal on them and toss them into some forgotten vault or underground prison, where they can’t hurt anyone—or themselves.”

  I gulped. Being sealed sounded like a fate worse than death. Actually, scratch that. It was a fate worse than death. I wanted to die and move on. That was the whole point of this ridiculous journey. But being trapped in some magical coffin for eternity? Big nada. Hard pass.

  Skully must’ve noticed the look on my face, because he tilted his head slightly and said, “Still think you can handle it on your own, tough guy?”

  I sighed, slumping against the table. “No,” I admitted reluctantly. “You’re still my best shot at figuring out how to move on. Guess I’m stuck with you.”

  “Gd you’re finally catching up,” Skully said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Now, if you’re done with your little moral crisis, we’ve got a heist to pn.”

  “Okay… if I were to possess a body… Who?”

  Skully paced the length of the dimly lit room, his bony fingers drumming against his jaw. “If you want to avoid tripping every ward and magical arm, you’ll need to possess someone who already has access to the pce. A maid, a nurse, a common soldier—someone mundane enough to not draw attention.”

  I raised a finger, interrupting his train of thought. “Or—and hear me out—maybe I could possess a bad guy’s body. You know, someone who probably deserves it?”

  Skully froze mid-step and turned to me, his fming eyes narrowing. “That’s… not the point.”

  I grinned, leaning back against the wall. “Okay, okay. How about an even better idea—a very recently dead body? You can’t tell me anyone’s gonna miss them, right? No harm, no foul.”

  Skully sighed deeply, the sound reverberating through the room like a gust of wind through a crypt. “Why is it,” he began, “that every time I suggest something reasonable, you immediately veer off into uncharted chaos? Do you remember that one time I told you not to move the furniture and the painting was better hung in the hallway?”

  “Chaos?” I said, feigning shock. “I’m suggesting a solution that doesn’t involve stepping all over some poor living person’s free will. There’s something called decency, you know. Even if it’s small and hypocritical, at least we’re trying. Also, don’t bme your furniture breaking down on me… I am innocent…”

  Skully crossed his arms, the fmes in his eye sockets flickering with irritation. “Decency,” he repeated ftly. “From the ghost who’s actively plotting a heist and looking for a way to get himself exorcised.”

  I shrugged. “Hey, decency comes in shades. We all have our moments. Anyway, how hard could it be to find a dead body in this city?”

  Skully tilted his head, a low hum escaping his jaw as he considered my question. “You’d be surprised,” he said finally. “Rague might seem peaceful on the surface, but trust me, it’s anything but.”

  That piqued my interest. “Oh? Do tell.”

  “Rague’s got its fair share of shady dealings,” Skully said, resuming his pacing. “The bck markets, the rival factions, the adventurers who don’t py by the rules—it’s not exactly a city of saints. If you really want a recently dead body, I’m sure we could find one. The trick will be doing it without drawing unnecessary attention.”

  I rubbed my chin thoughtfully. “So, what you’re saying is… we need to hit the sketchier parts of town?”

  Skully stopped pacing and gave me a long, pointed look. “That’s what you took from everything I just said?”

  I grinned. “I’m just saying, it’s an option.”

  The lich groaned, dragging his bony hand down his face. “Why do I feel like this is going to end in disaster?”

  “Because it’s me,” I said, fshing him a thumbs-up. “And disaster is kinda my thing. Of course, that’s more of a pessimistic thinking, but I try to look at bette parts after by enjoying it… I am an optimistic pessimist!”

  Skully muttered something under his breath—probably a curse—and then waved me off. “Fine. Go find your corpse on your own, since you’re so determined. I’ll be here setting up a teleportation ritual, just in case we need a quick escape ter.” He gnced at me sharply. “And when this goes horribly wrong—and it will—don’t forget that I told you so.”

  “Duly noted,” I said with a shrug, then stepped toward the bck armor sitting in the corner of the room. I phased inside, the familiar sensation of cold metal wrapping around my form as I possessed it. The armor groaned softly as it shifted to life, turning me once more into what Skully had called ‘living armor.’

  I stomped one armored foot on the floor for effect and turned to face Skully, who raised an unimpressed brow. In my best Terminator voice, I growled, “I’ll be back.”

  Skully sighed, pinching the bridge of his bony nose. “You’re lucky you’re already dead, because that was painful.”

  Ignoring him, I cnked my way toward the door, mentally preparing for whatever nonsense awaited me out there. If I had to find a corpse, at least I was going to do it in style.