I

  As Shinji and Asuka left Melody Lanes, the cold, quiet night outside felt like a release for Shinji, after all the bright lights and deafening sounds of the bowling center. Many of the guests had returned to their warm homes hours ago, and the parking lot was nearly empty, save for a handful of cars. Shinji wondered if Melody Lanes had maybe stayed open just for them.

  Asuka squeezed his hand and kissed him. ?Well sung, Baka. This round goes to you.“

  He kissed her back. ?Let’s just call it even.“

  ?Deal!“

  Touji and Hikari came out. Hikari had linked arms with Touji, and they were both singing ?I Will Survive‘ by Gloria Gaynor. Asuka nudged Shinji lightly in the side and whispered conspiratorially, ?I think they’ve got plans for later.“ Shinji grunted in agreement.

  ?Do you think they’ll actually go through with the tie thing?“

  ?What?“ Shinji asked.

  ?What?“ Touji and Hikari asked as they came within earshot.

  ?Oh, nothing!“ Asuka said.

  ?Hm, okay,“ Touji replied.

  ?So, where’s Bert?“ Asuka asked, checking her phone. ?I don’t want to celebrate my birthday in the car.“

  ?Chill out,“ Touji said. ?We only need about a quarter of an hour to the lookout—ouch! Hikari?“

  Hikari stared at Touji in disbelief, then punched him in the shoulder. ?What?!“ he asked.

  Shinji let out a long, resigned sigh.

  ?Huh?“ Asuka said. ?What lookout? Shinji?“

  ?Oh!“ Touji’s face lit up, only to fall again almost immediately. ?Oh… Sorry, Shinji…“

  ?You idiot!“ Hikari said, punching him again.

  ?Baka-Shinji, speak!“ Asuka demanded.

  ?Sorry, Asuka, it was supposed to be a surprise…“ He fumbled for the square object in his jacket pocket.

  Asuka’s eyes lit up, and she grinned. ?Another surprise?“

  ?Yeah,“ Touji said. ?Or do you think you can celebrate your eighteenth without your best friends?“

  Asuka looked around. ?So, is anyone else coming to the party?“

  ?Ha, ha…“ Touji said.

  Hikari squeezed Asuka’s hand and whispered, ?Sorry, I thought I distracted him enough so he couldn’t think straight.“

  ?What are you whispering about?“ Touji asked as a hand landed on his shoulder, making him jump.

  ?Don’t get involved in women’s business, Touji,“ Robert said with a wink. ?It rarely ends well.“

  ?All set?“ Shinji asked.

  ?All clear. We can go.“ Robert headed to the car, followed by Touji and Hikari.

  ?Shotgun!“ Touji yelled, dashing for the front passenger seat as if his life depended on it. Hikari shook her head and took a seat in the back.

  Shinji took Asuka’s hand. ?Coming?“ She stood there, rooted to the spot, her eyes wide open.

  ?Shinji, what…?“

  Shinji smiled mysteriously. ?Surprise.“ Then he gently pulled her toward the car.

  II

  As Touji had predicted, it really only took them about fifteen minutes to reach a small rest stop above the town. They parked the car in front of a small hill. The full moon bathed the staircase with its narrow railing in a pale light, marking the path up the hill.

  Robert turned around. ?Alright, kids, we’re here. Touji, Hikari, and I will set everything up, and you two can come in, say…?“ He looked at his watch. ?In about ten minutes. That’ll make it half past eleven. All on schedule, Shinji?“

  Shinji was sitting with Asuka and Hikari in the spacious back seat. ?All good, Robert, thanks.“

  ?Great, great. Touji, Hikari, let’s get to it!“

  ?And behave,“ Touji said with a wink.

  ?Touji!“ Hikari said just before they got out.

  Then they were alone. The trunk opened, and soon Shinji watched the trio carry several crates and bags up the stairs. Shinji knew exactly what was in all of them—after all, he had picked everything out and planned it. Except for Touji’s slip-up, of course.

  He looked at Asuka, who was staring out the window ahead, waiting until they were out of sight. Then she turned to face him. ?What are they doing?“

  In the silvery moonlight, she looked almost unreal, like an ethereal spirit brought to life. Her face gently surrounded by the cold brightness. ?Shinji? Why are you grinning like that?“

  He couldn’t help it, closed his eyes, and kissed her. Shinji had to be careful not to lose himself in the kiss, but when Asuka kissed him back, tentatively at first, then with increasing passion, he felt the walls inside him finally break down.

  Asuka pulled away briefly, her face only inches from his. ?Is this the plan?“ she whispered. ?The three of them have a picnic in the middle of the night, and we’re… doing it in the car? You little devil…“

  Shinji almost choked. ?What? No!“ he protested—but Asuka interrupted him with another kiss.

  The idea started to sound better to Shinji with each passing second, and his hand seemed to have a mind of its own, gently gliding over her cheek. Asuka’s hand, on the other hand, was already much further, sliding over his chest and moving downward—into very dangerous territory.

  ?Asuka…“ Shinji pulled away with great effort and opened his eyes.

  If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

  ?Hm?“ She sighed, and by all the angels—her predatory smile made him forget any plans or intentions for the evening.

  Suddenly, someone knocked on the window.

  Asuka jumped away from Shinji as if they were opposite poles of a magnet. Shinji’s face was on fire, and he could’ve sworn his whole body was on fire too. Additionally, a certain part of his body was suddenly uncomfortably tight in his clothes.

  Outside stood Robert, making cranking motions with his hand. Shinji glanced briefly at Asuka; her hair was slightly tousled, and she looked as though she had just run to Terminal Dogma and back. Still, she grinned at him with a mischievous gleam in her eyes before sticking out her tongue playfully.

  Robert knocked again. Sighing, Shinji rolled the window down.

  ?I’ve really been waiting a long time,“ Robert said with an exaggerated sigh, ?but then I got worried about the back seat. Body fluids and upholstery—no one wants that combination.“

  ?Bert!“ Asuka called, hiding her face behind her long red hair.

  Shinji just wanted to melt into the cracks of the back seat.

  ?And it’s almost midnight,“ Robert added, ?so if you’re ready…“

  ?Thanks, we—uh, I mean, we’re coming,“ Shinji stammered, trying to stare a hole through the passenger seat in front of him.

  ?Please don’t,“ Robert said dryly. ?Because of the stains.“

  ?Oh God, Bert!“ Asuka mumbled through her hair. ?Just go!“

  Robert laughed. ?Ah, it’s so easy to tease you guys.“ With that, he turned and walked up the small hill.

  The cold winter air rushed in, helping Shinji’s body temperature return to a comfortable 38 degrees. His mind cleared a little. He looked at Asuka, who, at the same moment, let her hair-shield fall, and they both burst out laughing. Little clouds formed in the icy air before their faces.

  ?That was embarrassing!“ Asuka said between laughs.

  ?Yeah,“ Shinji said. ?But not as bad as that time on the Ferris wheel. Remember? I thought the old lady was going to have a heart attack.“

  ?And that poor kid…“

  ?There was a kid?“

  ?Baka,“ Asuka said, opening the car door and getting out. ?Come on, let’s go!“

  Shinji followed her. ?But you have to close your eyes!“ he said as he walked around the car.

  ?Oh, so mysterious!“

  ?Just walk behind me, hold on to me, and keep your eyes shut, okay?“

  ?Alright, Baka.“ She pressed against him from behind and hugged him tightly. One of her hands suddenly moved to his crotch. ?Like this?“ she whispered in his ear.

  Shinji jumped slightly and let out a soft, surprised cry. ?Asuka!“

  Asuka put her hand back to his shoulder and loosened her embrace a little. ?Sorry, still a bit dazed from earlier.“

  ?It’s fine. We can pick this up later.“

  ?You can bet on that! So, let’s go, Ikari. All I see is the ground and your little sexy butt.“

  Shinji sighed, and they kept walking.

  III

  The second time that evening, Asuka didn’t know what to say. After Shinji had led her up the stairs and allowed her to open her eyes, she could only stand there and stare at the sea of lights that Touji, Hikari, and Robert had set up before them. Dozens of large and small candles were scattered across the floor. Some were placed on the large, rustic wooden table that formed the center of the small area. Two wooden benches framed the table on either side.

  It looked as though a small part of the starry sky had fallen to the ground.

  The whole area was about five meters wide and long and sloped steeply at the back. A thick wooden fence prevented anyone from falling into the abyss. Behind it, Asuka could see the valley and the city, slowly falling asleep as only a few lights remained shining. Not a single cloud obscured the full moon. Shinji stood before her and seemed about to say something, but she embraced him and kissed him.

  ?Hey,“ he said after the kiss.

  ?Hey…“

  ?If the lady could take a seat…“ Robert said, gesturing to a camping chair in front of him, covered with a large, white, and very cozy-looking blanket. ?It’s freezing and really late.“

  ??How to kill the mood‘ – is that your book?“ Asuka asked as she sat down in the chair. Shinji tucked the blanket around her.

  ?It’s really cold,“ Hikari shivered as she sat with Touji and Robert on the bench. Touji put his arm around her. ?Better?“ he asked. Hikari nodded shyly and rested her head on his shoulder.

  Another camping chair stood in front of Asuka, in the middle of the sea of lights. Shinji sat down with his guitar.

  ?Where did you hide all this stuff?“ Asuka asked, still not quite able to grasp what had happened in the last thirty minutes. Was she dreaming? She hoped not. And if she was, she didn’t want to wake up.

  Shinji grinned and tuned his guitar.

  ?The car has a big trunk,“ Robert said.

  ?Probably enough room for a body,“ Touji said, grinning.

  ?Two, if you break a few bones,“ Robert replied seriously.

  Hikari gasped. Touji asked, ?You’re not messing with us, are you? Or…?“

  Robert stared at Touji without blinking.

  Asuka laughed. Then Robert laughed too. ?Yeah, just kidding, I’m just messing with you.“

  Touji and Hikari sighed in relief.

  ?There were three,“ Robert said then.

  Asuka nodded. ?Right.“

  Touji coughed. Hikari covered her mouth with her hand.

  ?How—?“ Touji squeaked, then cleared his throat. ?How, ?Right‘?“

  ?Funny story, so—“ Asuka began, but a loud cough from Shinji made her look forward.

  ?I’m ready,“ he said and struck a chord.

  Asuka snuggled into her blanket and waited.

  Shinji took a deep breath and looked down. ?I’ve written dozens of songs, but none of them seemed right. I just can’t find the right words to express what you mean to me and how I feel about you. And you know I’m not a big talker…“ He smiled and lifted his gaze. Asuka smiled back and blew him a kiss.

  ??I love you‘ sums it up well,“ Shinji said. ?But beyond that… I’m missing the nuances, all the little mosaics that make us who we are. All the shades between our colors.“ He scratched the back of his head before continuing. ?That’s why I tried to capture all of that in my music. I hope you like it.“

  The first notes came hesitantly and slowly. They tapped out cautiously, like a toddler just learning to walk. More and more notes wandered, growing louder and softer. A dance, a play of light and shadow.

  Asuka had to think about their first encounter. It seemed like several lifetimes ago, so far removed from what they had now. Back then, they were like oil and water. Always keeping their distance. Always careful not to let the other get too close, afraid they might see through the wall.

  Shinji’s playing grew faster and louder. His fingers flew aggressively and chaotically over the strings.

  Asuka thought about their shared battles against the Angels, all the days when they didn’t know if they would survive the night. Chords flew like shrapnel through the air.

  Shinji’s face was tense. The candlelight reflected off his sweat-drenched forehead.

  The notes tore into Asuka’s flesh like prog-knives, reopening old scars. Asuka began to cry. Over and over, an angry riff pounded out from Shinji’s guitar. Over and over, Arael invaded her mind and pulled everything to the surface; shattered all the walls; dragged her mind through the dirt and left only raw flesh and burnt earth behind.

  Then, the chaos stopped abruptly. A final note rang out softly and was swallowed by the snow. Asuka wiped away her tears as Shinji took a quick breath and struck a melody she knew all too well.

  Asuka laughed and cried at the same time as she recognized the song. It was the German lullaby Shinji had sung to her that evening when she had been bleeding in Misato’s bathroom. The song transformed into another one from the many Shinji had sung to her. The medley swelled, filling her entire presence and flooding her mind with light and warmth. The melodies burned like the light, dispelling shadows and cold within her, and rekindled the flame that had almost gone out back then.

  Shinji smiled softly, his eyes closed. His song brushed against her like a warm wind, whispering promises of a shared future. Promises of peaceful days and warm nights. Whispered assurances of their mutual love and connection. Without walls and boundaries.

  The whispering grew louder, taking up more and more space. A small stream became a river, became a raging torrent. The promises, never to be alone again. Always together, never alone. Asuka felt life. She was alive, she wanted to live. She wanted to create life. Always together, never alone.

  And then… it was silent. The guitar faded away.

  Asuka’s heart pounded in her throat. Her tears had left small white ice trails on her face. Her head hurt. Her heart hurt, and she could no longer think clearly. The music, the song, had torn her apart and put her back together. It seemed like some parts had been forgotten. But only the bad, broken, and unimportant parts.

  Shinji breathed heavily, his breath fogging in the cold winter night. He opened his eyes, put the guitar down, and stood up. His face… She had never seen him like this. In his eyes burned a determined fire that could blow away Angels and mountains. He slowly approached her, reached into his jacket pocket, and pulled something out. Then he sank to his knees in the snow and extended his hand. Inside was a small black box. He opened it, and a silver ring with a small gemstone appeared. The candlelight refracted in the gemstone, and it looked as though a small fire was glowing inside.

  ?Asuka Soryu Langley,“ Shinji said, looking her in the eyes. ?Will you marry me?“

  Somewhere outside of her consciousness, Hikari gasped, and Touji said something. But Asuka, whose mind was still a battlefield of emotions, where the dead were only now starting to be cleared away, said the only thing that came to her mind and that she was utterly certain was the right thing:

  ?No.“