I

  Shinji sat alone in the back seat and stared out of the window into the passing darkness. His cell phone vibrated. It was a message from Touji: Hey. If Hikari and I are at the hotel and you still feel like chatting, just write!

  Shinji put his cell phone down and continued to stare outside. No. He had poured his heart and soul into the play. His fingertips still hurt – just like his heart. He reached into his pocket and searched for the ring. No. That little word was still pounding in his head long after they had left the rest area. No.

  To describe the last half hour as unpleasant would be like saying that Shinji’s father had merely been strict. Robert, Touji and Hikari had finally made a desperate attempt to save the situation and lighten the mood: They had toasted Asuka’s birthday at midnight with beer and champagne. But Shinji had only had one word on his mind the whole time – in big red letters: No.

  The atmosphere in the car was as gloomy and dense as the darkness outside. Every now and then, a passing street lamp lit up the darkness for a brief moment. Occasional exchanges between Asuka and Robert broke through the thick fog inside, if only for a moment.

  ?Shit weather,“ said Asuka.

  ?You wanted to drive,“ Robert replied. ?But watch out, it could be slippery in places.“

  ?I’m driving so slowly anyway!“

  ?And that’s a good thing. Do you want to swap?“

  ?No! My birthday’s already fucked anyway, at least let me have this.“

  Shinji winced. Her words stabbed directly into his open wound. Her birthday was fucked? And she blamed him? She hadn’t said it like that, but he had known her long enough to hear the accusatory undertone. No – he had known her for a long time, but apparently not well enough.

  The silence in the car grew louder and louder until it roared in Shinji’s ears like a raging river. ?Robert, can you please turn on the radio?“

  ?Okay.“

  The radio started up and Future Days by Pearl Jam played from the speakers.

  ?You’ve got to be kidding me…“ said Shinji.

  ?I’ll turn it off again,“ said Robert.

  ?No! Let it go. I…“, Asuka said.

  Shinji looked in the rearview mirror and gazed into her tired, sad eyes.

  ?Shinji, I…“

  Actually, those eyes should have made him forget all his anger and rage. Just like before. But not today. No.

  ?Do you love me?“ he asked.

  Asuka frowned. ?Yes, of course!“

  ?Ah, so you know the word ?yes‘.“ Today he wanted to hurt. He wanted to dish it out.

  Asuka’s eyes flinched. Hit. He had expected that. But not the glint as tears filled her eyes. She wiped them away roughly and stared ahead again.

  Well done, Ikari, Shinji thought. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. ?Asuka, I am–?

  ?So I’m supposed to say ?yes‘ just because you played a bit of guitar and bought a cheap ring?“ Asuka snapped at him. ?Like in some cheesy romance movie?“

  Shinji was shaking. His hands clenched into fists so tightly that his fingernails dug into his flesh. Okay, Soryu, you want war?

  ?Children, please!“ Robert shouted, turning to Shinji. ?Work it out at your house over a mulled wine or something, but not in the car.“ He turned to Asuka. ?And certainly not while you’re at the wheel!“

  ?Why do you even need something like weddings…“

  ?Asuka…“ Robert said warningly.

  ?Oh, I don’t know,“ Shinji said. His voice dripped with sarcasm. ?Maybe because it feels nice to tie the knot like that?“

  ?Shinji, please…“ said Robert.

  ?Maybe because it expresses how much you love each other and that you want to grow old together?“

  Shinji’s voice got louder and louder.

  ?I can do that too! I don’t need a-?

  ?Cheap ring?“ Shinji spat out the word cheap like a piece of rotten meat.

  ?Stop!“ Robert shouted. ?Both of you!“ He switched off the radio, which had been playing Linkin Park’s In the End a few seconds ago. ?Asuka, pull over.“

  ?But I-?

  ?Pull. Over. I don’t want to pull out the ?this-is-a-command-card‘.“

  Asuka cursed and pounded the steering wheel. Then the car slowed down and pulled over to the side of the road. The headlights were lost on the road in front of them. Scattered snowflakes fell into the cone of light. Shinji looked out of the window again. Only dark forest and endless void.

  They hadn’t argued this violently for a long time. Or ever?

  ?There we go,“ said Robert. ?Now everyone take three deep breaths in and out. You too, Asuka. We won’t leave until the atmosphere in here is no longer like a battlefield.“

  Shinji was tired. Everything hurt him. All he wanted to do was sleep.

  ?One.“ Robert took an audible breath.

  ?I have something else to say,“ said Asuka.

  ?Two!“ Robert inhaled even louder.

  Asuka grunted, then took three quick breaths in quick succession and expelled them again. ?One-two-three!“

  ?Three,“ Robert said with an implied sigh.

  Shinji exhaled deeply. He had closed his eyes.

  ?Shinji, please look at me.“

  Her soft voice made him tremble again. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes and looked ahead. Damn, he thought. The orange glow of the dashboard lights didn’t show much of her face – but enough. His anger and rage evaporated like smoke when a candle goes out. Before him sat a vulnerable, frightened Asuka, without her usual walls, without the prickly fa?ade.

  ?I just wanted to say… I…“ She gave Robert a quick glance before turning his head forward with both hands. ?Listen away, please! Can’t you just get out for a minute?“

  ?What? It’s freezing outside!“ protested Robert.

  ?Pussy!“ said Asuka.

  Shinji stifled a grin. He didn’t want to laugh now. On the one hand, he was still angry and offended, but on the other, he sensed that Asuka’s next words were important. Important for both of them. So important that she even wanted to say them in front of Robert.

  She sighed, ?Okay. You’re almost family.“

  ?Thank you. I’ll cover my ears too.“ Robert demonstratively stuck both index fingers in his ears and squeezed his eyes tightly shut.

  If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

  Asuka shook her head with a smile. ?Idiot… Okay, where were we?“

  ?You were about to explain why getting married is stupid, that my ring is cheap, and-?

  ?Yeah, yeah, we’ll come back to that later.“

  She took a deep breath and held out her hands to him. He took them hesitantly. Her hands were warm and soft.

  ?I like it the way it is,“ said Asuka. ?I love our life. I love you! I don’t want to change anything because I’m… I’m afraid, Shinji. Afraid that every step, every decision, could burst all of this – us – like a soap bubble.“

  ?Asuka…“ He squeezed her hands. ?What do you think will change when we’re married?“

  A car drove past them. The light illuminated Asuka’s face, and more tears glistened in her eyes.

  ?Oh, I don’t know!“ She pulled her hands away and ran them through her long hair.

  ?Are you afraid we’ll be some stuffy old married couple?“ Shinji grinned and took her hands again. ?Or that everything will get boring and everyday life will catch up with us?“

  Asuka laughed. ?Ha, nope. I’d make sure of that. It’s just…“ She looked at her hands. ?Shinji, I… I can’t have kids.“ Asuka paused, and for a moment the silence in the car was almost suffocating.

  ?Shinji?“ Asuka continued, her voice quieter now, as if she feared the air might break at that moment as well. ?And that’s the next logical step, isn’t it? You get married, you have children, you get older…“

  Shinji sighed heavily. ?You can’t have kids, too?“

  Asuka stared at him. ?What?“

  Shinji scratched the back of his head. ?Ritsuko told me a few years ago, at our last check-up.“

  Asuka was still staring, her mouth half open.

  ?At first,“ Shinji continued, ?I didn’t really care. I mean, when you’re fourteen or so, you don’t think about it that much. But as we got older and spent more time with Misato and Robert’s kids…“ His voice broke, his eyes burned and his chest constricted.

  Asuka gently touched his cheek. ?Come here, baka.“ She pressed her forehead against his. ?Let’s work through all this tomorrow. It’s late and I’m completely done.“

  ?Okay.“ Shinji wiped his tears away.

  ?I love you,“ she said, breaking away from him and then kissing him.

  ?I love you too,“ he said. His chest was suddenly so light, and he couldn’t stop grinning.

  ?Julia and I are always desperately looking for babysitters anyway,“ Robert said suddenly.

  Asuka whirled around. ?Oh my God, Bert! How much did you catch?“

  Shinji giggled.

  Robert shrugged, raised a hand and spread his thumb and forefinger apart. ?That much?“

  Asuka punched him in the shoulder. ?I swear to you, Bert, if we-“ Bright light suddenly flooded the car. Shinji narrowed his eyes and raised his hand in front of his face.

  ?What the hell?“ Asuka said.

  Then several things happened at once: lashing thunderclaps sounded, and several star-shaped patterns appeared on the armored windshield. Shinji flinched, and Robert shouted, ?Get down!“ before pushing Asuka’s head down roughly.

  Shinji stared like a deer in headlights, unable to move, and looked forward between the seats. Is it hailing? his slow mind managed to think.

  ?You too!“ shouted Robert, who suddenly had a gun in his hand.

  Something flashed at the front. Shinji threw himself across the back seat as more explosions echoed and new stars blossomed on the windshield. Their cracks spread out like cobwebs.

  ?Fuck!“ shouted Asuka. ?What are those w-“ A deafening explosion cut off Asuka’s words. The car leapt upwards and Shinji was thrown into the footwell. Another explosion followed, and the car was torn sideways. And then – silence.

  ?What the hell was that?“ asked Asuka.

  Shinji raised his head and looked ahead. The windshield was a chaotic pattern of milky cobwebs, through which the light refracted and cast jagged shadows. A bitter, medicinal smell stung Shinji’s nose. The smell was familiar to him. It smelled like his old, broken SDAT-player, which had almost burst into flames a few years ago. He held out a hand to Asuka. ?Are you hurt?“ She rubbed her head, winced and then looked at her hand. ?I’m okay.“

  ?Asuka, Shinji, status?“ asked Robert.

  ?Everything’s okay,“ Asuka repeated.

  ?Everything’s okay,“ said Shinji. ?Robert?“

  ?Delta-Romeo-7 to base, come in,“ Robert said. He put his free hand to his ear. ?Under attack. Car under heavy fire. Position about 15 clicks from Sanctuary. Need immediate evacuation!“

  ?Bert, what-?“ Asuka started, but Robert held up an index finger. Several heartbeats passed. Shinji only now realized that he had been holding his breath. ?They’re interfering with the radio,“ Robert said after a few seconds. Shinji exhaled.

  ?They? Who?“ asked Asuka.

  ?I don’t know,“ Robert replied. ?The enemy.“

  The blinding light went out, and the car went dark.

  ?Whoever it is, fuck him, we’re leaving!“ shouted Asuka and shifted into reverse. She looked back over her shoulder and stepped on the gas.

  The car reared up like a trapped animal. The tires spun and howled shrilly on the asphalt, but the movement was stopped abruptly, followed by a hideous crunch. Shinji was thrown against the back seat. Then he peered forward at the dashboard, on which several red signal lights had now come to life.

  ?Shit, why aren’t we moving?“ Asuka cursed and stepped on the gas again. That crunching sound again, like stepping on glass. Again the tires howled plaintively, but the car didn’t move. The signal lights continued to flash.

  Shinji sniffed again. Although burnt rubber was now mixed in, he could still make out the smell from before. ?That smell, it seems so familiar… Is that…?“

  ?Bakelite,“ Robert said. He tried to look down out of the window. ?They nailed us down with Bakelite.“

  Asuka looked at Robert. ?Bullshit!“ She stepped on the gas again. ?Bakelite! You can’t just buy that at the gas station!“ The car jerked – Shinji was thrown back and forth again – and then stalled completely. Asuka stomped on the gas pedal like a maniacal death metal drummer on his double bass. Then she hit the steering wheel. ?Fuck!“

  ?Leave it, Asuka. We’re not getting out of here,“ Robert said.

  ?So what do we do now?“

  ?Get out and kick their asses,“ Asuka suggested.

  ?That’ll be plan B,“ said Robert. ?Plan A is to wait and see.“

  ?Wait and see?“ asked Shinji. Asuka snorted.

  ?Wait and see. They’re not beginners. Bakelite, a radio jammer… rapid-fire weapons… Too well equipped for a simple ambush. And why go to the trouble of freezing us and jamming the radio? They want us alive.“

  ?Oh, well then! Thanks, Bert, you always know how to cheer someone up!“ said Asuka.

  ?But why?“ asked Shinji. He took Asuka’s hand in his and squeezed it. She was drenched in sweat. You couldn’t tell by looking at her, but she was just as scared as he was.

  ?I have no idea. That’s why we’ll wait and see. We have to stall as much as possible. Our car sends its location to the base via GPS every few minutes. Even if they can jam this signal, it’ll be obvious that we’re not moving and something must have happened. And no human can pee for that long, if you think about it. In addition, a time window has been agreed in which I have to report back as soon as I have dropped you off.“

  ?So wait and see…“ said Shinji.

  ?Yes. And whatever happens, remember your training.“

  ?Ha, yes. Then all those hours on the training grounds and in hand-to-hand combat will finally have some use!“ said Asuka, cracking her knuckles.

  ?I’d rather we didn’t need them,“ Shinji said quietly.

  ?Me too, Shinji,“ Robert said.

  Suddenly, the light outside came on again. Shinji leaned forward, close to Asuka, and tried to peer outside. The right-hand side of the windshield was completely covered in cobwebs and stars. On the driver’s side, however, you could still see something through a few clear spots. He saw a large black van about twenty meters away, parked across the road. It was illuminated by some source of light outside Shinji’s field of vision. Suddenly, four people came forward from behind the van, all armed and dressed completely in white. Their faces were covered by masks, also white. The masks resembled bony bird skulls with two black holes for eyes. An elongated, beak-like protrusion protruded downwards from the center. They looked so familiar to Shinji…

  ?What kind of psychos are those?“ Asuka asked.

  ?Let me see,“ said Robert, leaning over to Asuka and Shinji.

  ?They’ve got masks on…“ Asuka said. ?They look like…“

  Shinji suddenly felt cold. His stomach tightened. ?Bird masks… Sachiel?“

  Robert cursed.

  ?Sachiel? The third angel?“ Asuka asked.

  ?Mors Caeli,“ Robert said quietly. Then he tapped his ear again. ?Delta-Romeo-7 to base, come in…“

  ?Those terror wankers?“ asked Asuka. ?What the hell?“

  Shinji looked behind him. ?We could sneak out of the back of the car and disappear into the forest, couldn’t we?“

  ?Wait!“ said Asuka. ?Something’s happening up ahead.“

  Shinji whirled around and Robert leaned over to them again. The side door of the van slid open. Two more Mors Caeli followers dressed in white got out. Then two people appeared in the doorway. They had black sacks over their heads. A third Mors Caeli behind them roughly pushed the two outside. The taller one managed to catch himself, but the shorter one hit the concrete hard. The taller one immediately tried to rush to his aid, but a punch to the stomach from a Mors Caeli caused him to collapse. The person lying on the ground was roughly dragged upwards by his hands, which were tied behind his back.

  The silence in the car was now palpable. Shinji and Asuka stared trembling at the surreal scene before them. Robert turned away and slid back to his side, where he was typing on his cell phone.

  ?Who the hell are these two?“ asked Asuka.

  ?Not our problem at the moment,“ said Robert, without looking up from his cell phone.

  Asuka and Shinji looked at Robert in horror.

  ?WTF, Bert?!“ said Asuka.

  ?But we have to do something, don’t we?“ said Shinji.

  Robert tapped his cell phone a few more times, then shook his head. Sighing heavily, he put the cell phone away and looked at Shinji and Asuka. ?My job is to protect you two and keep you alive. Our situation is currently ?fucked‘, to say the least. So we can’t—“

  ?SHINJI IKARI!“ a distorted voice suddenly boomed.

  All three flinched.

  ?ASUKA SORYU LANGLEY!“

  Asuka peered out of the window. Shinji squeezed in next to her, and Robert leaned back into the driver’s side.

  ?ROBERT BRUNNER!“ A Mors Caeli stood next to the hooded figures now kneeling in front of them. In one hand he held a megaphone in front of his Sachiel mask, the other pointed a pistol at one person’s head.

  ?Fuck!“ Robert cursed.

  ?What… What is this?“ asked Shinji.

  ?They know our names, Baka!“

  ?Our names?“ Shinji’s head began to buzz. His breathing quickened, his heart raced. He was sweating.

  Robert looked back at Shinji. ?We’ll try Shinji’s plan. See if you can open the door, but very slowly.“

  ?O… Okay!“ Shinji reached out to the door handle when Asuka suddenly cried out.

  ?What?!“ Shinji wheeled around. Another attack? But I didn’t hear a gunshot.

  ?Asuka, status!“ asked Robert sharply.

  ?Nein!“ shouted Asuka in German. ?Fuck! Diese Arschl?cher! Ich bring sie alle um!?

  Shinji looked at her. Her eyes were wide, her hands gripping the steering wheel so tightly that her knuckles were sticking out white. ?Asuka, what…?“

  Then she cupped her hands to her face and began to sob. Shinji pushed himself even further forward, carefully put an arm around her and looked outside – and wished he hadn’t at the same moment. His stomach turned, cold sweat broke out.

  The two people no longer had sacks over their heads. There in front of them, on the cold asphalt, with gags in their mouths and panic in their eyes, knelt Touji and Hikari.