“Pushing so far is very unhealthy, you will drain your body on both sides.”

  “This again? Goddammit…” I complained as the annoying voice in the darkness called me out in a preaching tone. Having no way to interact with it, but being forced to hear was such a pain... Until it wasn't.

  “I sadly cannot damn anything from here.” She answered off-handedly, seemingly not noticing such. “That would be mean.”

  “What?!”

  “What what?”

  “You’re answering me, aren’t you?”

  “That is…? That is true! It finally went through! This is wonderful.”

  “Yes, it is!” I commemorated together with the goddess using an annoying voice, before getting serious with it. “Now give me my cheats.”

  “Your… what?”

  “Stats, screens, skills, levels, all that overpowered nonsense, gimme that. I don't care about making sense, I want the easy mode here.”

  “I do not understand…”

  “Tch! And I was sure Mr. Hero had something of the kind…” I clicked my tongue at what I thought was a goddess and only then noticed that this could be a problem. “I mean, what do you want to tell me so much if it's not about cheats?”

  “Oh! Yes, telling you why I came…” She focused a bit and cleared her throat. “Do hear me, you are on the right path, but you are wrong about your magic. More so, draining your body with ancient spells like this before fixing your summoning or your awakening is…”

  The voice trailed off as the time limit of the dream finally came to an end exactly before I could get something from it.

  “Sigh… You took too long. My fault this time.”

  Then I started to wake up while hearing complaining noises that seemed to go farther and farther away.

  I still had no idea why she was using this voice or why she would only appear when I slept or got knocked off, but that was okay for now. I mean, it’d be better if she told me what the point of this mess was, but she at least gave me another tip. And her last visit was what allowed the present situation anyway.

  That was for later, though. I now had a horribly aching body to deal with and an unknown bedroom. I also noticed that my left hand, the one that got burned during the last stunt, had barely any feeling to it. Another thing to worry about… But the close-faced Elen staying by my side comes first.

  “Where am…?”

  “I took over the local lord’s bedroom to have you treated quietly,” Elen spoke by the side of the bed while sharpening her blades with a very serious expression that felt as if she was still angry about something. “We had to take your clothes off and clear you up, though. Sorry about that. I know you don’t like to be seen, and I kind of saw why... At least the new wounds didn’t leave any scars.”

  The thought that they saw me without proper make-up made me sick, but there was little I could do now. At least, it didn’t seem like Elen would ask anything.

  “Thanks. Just…” I muttered the best I could while still trying to get my head in place. “How things went after I got down?”

  “The fort is still on fire, but the soldiers left. If they weren’t so organized when retreating, or if the knights weren’t so hurried, we could’ve done more, but it’s a victory overall.”

  “They did capture some supplies as the enemies fled, at least. But I think the way the enemies moved when fleeing had more to do with why we couldn’t rout them.” Eve added as she entered the room with some bowls and a small basket in hand. “Here’s some food, milady.”

  “Is this late already?” I asked after taking the good-looking cream soup and a loaf of white bread. We left the castle almost in time for dinner, and this one was too simple for it to still be the same meal.

  “You got out for most of the afternoon. Both potions and healing magic weren't doing much, so we got worried… Just a little, of course.”

  “Your Highness was almost rushing to the capital to drag the cardinal here… But I knew you would be fine.”

  “Shut up and eat your food, Eve!” Elen hissed at her maid, getting a small bow in answer as the dark-haired girl moved to a chair in the corner. “She’s exaggerating, okay? I was sure you were fine… It was only a little weird how the effects seemed muted. It was almost the opposite of how you deal with mana potions.”

  That’s interesting, both the new information and seeing how worried the princess was. Even made me smile a little. I still have to fix my make-up and clothes, but I guess I could wait a little bit and eat my supper first.

  My body’s hurting too much for me to try and do something more complicated anyway. I guess pushing that hard on mana and then getting heavily wounded has its drawbacks... In fact, even eating was harder than usual. Is it something related to the mana potions or to the wounds, though? Hard to be sure.

  “So…” I called out while fighting against my spoon and the soup. “How bad is the situation?”

  “How bad?” Elen asked and even the dark-haired maid cocked her head in confusion.

  “Yes. I got my ass kicked… Quite sure the whole ‘pretend to be the hero’ plan failed this time.”

  “I’m very sure it’s the opposite, isn’t it, Eve? Though the fact we failed to keep you safe will be a huge blight for me.”

  “Yes, Your Highness. Both the servants and the local peasants were set to talk about it already, and we have criers spreading the news already.”

  “Wait, wait, wait! What did you do?!”

  “I had the official criers and some kids paid to spread the news, milady. It’s the simplest method of spreading information inside a city.” Eve explained as if it was no more than standard procedure for her. “I thought you were aware of these techniques…”

  This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

  “Yeah, with all the skullduggery and swindling, you seemed like someone who would do this kind of thing.”

  “Well, yes, I just didn’t think of using them… Lying like this won’t help. It’s too far from reality to what I need.” My mumblings seemed to bother Elen since she got up and closed in on me very hard as if I was saying nonsense.

  “You did take the castle like you said you would, and by the time the knights got there, we had some twenty enemies down. What exactly do you think is wrong with saying you are the hero who destroyed the ‘one-night castle’?” The rogue princess continued as if it was obvious, looking angry at me somehow. “We did some work on it, of course, but all’s on you, you know? In fact, you’re pretty much the only one who did anything… How exactly would someone not see that?

  That was… Right? It sounded right. But it shouldn’t be… Should it? I mean, I lost. Even if I won the battle by losing the duel, I’m alive by miracle... Shouldn’t that be a problem? And more than that, why does Elen seem so annoyed right now?

  What a mess…

  Better not think about it.

  If it worked, then it worked, I guess. Nothing more, nothing less.

  “Well, it looks like being a hero is a little easier than I thought.”

  “Have you noticed that you destroyed a whole fort but also almost died in the process? How exactly is that ‘easy’, you dimwit?!”

  Oh? It was a joke, you know? No reason to get so angry… I’ll change subjects again.

  “That’s… Fair, actually... But… Oh! What about the little elf? Where’s she? I have to thank her.” I forced my way out of the talk while getting a spoonful of the creamy yellowish soup that, by my guess, was based on chicken and onions. The taste was somewhat similar to what I knew, but this one was much worse than what I had at the palace. Was it about the ingredients or about the chef? Who knows…

  Made me think again of how farm animals looked in this place.

  I’m losing focus again, aren’t I? Back to the talk.

  “The archer…? Any idea where’s she, Eve? Last time I saw her, we were yet to return to the city.” Elen answered as she munched on the after drenching it in the soup. “And you got any wine?”

  “She is inside the castle for sure, but I haven’t seen her since we finished treating Lady Illia. Lady Lhoris looked a little out of sorts when I saw her too… Many mages came from the capital, so she may be with them. I even saw Sir Calixto moving around earlier.” The maid answered, and while she did so, she moved her food to a table nearby and started to shuffle her dress until a small canteen appeared. “What they have here won’t be to your taste, Your Highness, unless you're willing to try the so-called 'high-class' goods. I still have some of the cider from the capital, though.”

  “Pass it here. A little weak, but I'm not drinking those stupid things that taste like alcohol and nothing more...”

  “Out of sorts, eh? Maybe she’s… And with the mage here too…” I wondered as the canteen moved from one side of the room to the other, but I’d need to find her to be sure. Would be a good way to thank her for helping with my plan earlier too.

  As I was thinking about it, though, the noises from outside finally got my attention. They looked like cheers, which gave me a good idea of what was happening. I guess having the weird one-night castle destroyed was enough for some commemoration.

  “I didn’t take you for a party person.” The small remark came from my side as the princess noticed me looking out the window and the noise from outside. “If you’re good enough to move, there shouldn’t be any problem with making an appearance there. I’m sure everyone would be interested in the maniacs who burned that thing…”

  “That’s a tasteless way to put it, even if it's true…” I shrugged with a small smile but closed it fast to get my head on how to better use it. “I’m not fond of parties, but I should get out there still. Looking impressive is part of the job, even if wounded.”

  “The story is that you’re unused to your magic and went too hard at it. Most knights only saw you fainted, and Your Highness was kept under control. Only the lord saw the reality, but we ‘asked’ him to stay quiet.”

  “No one needed to be kept under control, okay?! But you can keep playing your tricks, even if I see less and less reason to…”

  She was trying to hint something here, but it wasn’t something I was willing to hear. Hell, even if I somehow had power on the same level as that sleeping dumbass, I’d still stay away from taking his place. I wouldn’t be throwing away my newly gotten role in exchange for something bigger that I can’t keep. And more, I’m no hero.

  I’m not a hero and never will be one.

  “No rest for the wicked, I guess…” I gave up on the spoon I couldn’t hold and went to the uncouth way of consuming soup, dealing with the bowl in a few seconds at the cost of amusing Elen to a huge extent. “I’ll find Lhoris first. See you two after that… I need a moment to get ready, okay?”

  They seemed to take the hint as I slowly got up and made sure I could stay up without a problem. Shouldn’t be a problem as long as I didn’t run around or move too much.

  “We’ll be around then. Maybe at the good party. Good luck dealing with the boring one…” Elen spoke with a small hint of worry in her eyes, but this much vanished as she got up and finished her soup just like I did earlier.

  After that, even if not willingly, the two left the room as I went to the dresser to take a look in the mirror, making sure my situation wasn't good. Make-up either not there or blurred, minimalist clothes that showed things I didn't want to, and the waning remains of my hairdo mostly done for. Even my upkeep and liberal use of magic wouldn't save the drills now... I guess it’s time to accept that I can only keep a simple hairstyle here without professional help.

  At least my armor and clothes are, mostly, folded on a corner of the bed. Some pieces are missing for obvious reasons, but I can manage with these and a little work. My personal baggage is here anyway.

  Very good that Eve and Elen understand me enough to leave these around. An hour to get everything ready, and I was already in the corridors again. It didn't even take much wandering through the smallish frontier castle for me to find where the pompous people were. And there, it was easy to see my target.

  The fact he seemed to be the center of attention at the small ball commemorating the win was irrelevant for me, though.

  “Hey, Cal, give me a word here, please,” I called the handsome mage from the middle of his group, trying to keep a low profile as he noticed and hurried to approach me. “Any reason you’re here?”

  “Huh?! Lady Illia…” Cal got surprised for a moment, but then made a small curtsy and got closer to whisper to me. “Father heard of you managing to figure out silver magic, so he was frantic. Taking the chance to ‘reinforce’ the frontier since you were here was his excuse to drag me and a group of mages to talk with you.”

  “So that’s how it is…” I mumbled again while still parading close to the supposed backup the little elf called. “Is he around?”

  “I’m sure he is at the lord’s office, negotiating his support. His plan was more about finding you, but he got roped up on it since you were wounded.”

  “Yeah, don’t wanna deal with him… Have you seen Lhoris around? I have to talk with her.”

  “I saw her for a moment when we arrived, yes. She came to ‘talk’ with me with a small letter asking to take over helping you… I wasn’t sure of what was happening, but she seemed down.” He answered before going into a somewhat depressed expression. “Sadly, I don’t have a way of talking with her.”

  “Makes sense. But if it’s this bad… How young is that girl? And more than that, is she used to fighting?”

  “No idea. On both. She acts very young and is a competent fighter, but it’s hard to be sure with her people… More so, she can’t talk. All I know is that Lady Lhoris is sometimes a little too na?ve, and not very fond of hunting, but she’s also very important for the forest folk. She even got through the selection almost right away, and I’m sure she wasn’t supposed to be there.”

  “That’s troublesome…” I mumbled as I noticed the fact my actions could have caused someone to be traumatized. People burning wasn’t something you’d like to see, right? “Any idea of places that girl likes to be close by?”

  “No idea… Princess Valiria or Sir Hayato would know better, but she spent most of her time in the groove back at the palace, I believe.”

  “This place have any gardens then?”

  “That’s a little…” He spoke up in a somewhat unsure tone as I also got that asking the guy who just came for information was a little too much. “Can you explain to me what’s happening, please?”

  Explaining everything to him seemed reasonable, but more people were noticing my existence in the room. A little more and they would figure out who I was and start hounding around, and that would be a pain.

  “Not now. Deal with the nobles for me, okay? After that, we can talk. Elen should be somewhere with the soldiers outside if you need her…”

  I then disengaged from the confused dark-haired guy and started to skulk outside the hall again, only stopping to scare off a maid and ask her where the gardens are. Something that got me a surprising answer…