I stood before the Duchess, a little lost. My posture was straight, my words eloquent, and there was none of my childish anger or belligerence I usually showed when we met, but she didn’t notice. Things weren’t wildly different, but it was enough to notice.

  The nobility were creatures of vanity. It's not that they weren’t cautious or intelligent, though some weren’t. Barely able to string a sentence together, but lording over others because of the accomplishments of long-dead ancestors. No, it was that they had to consider you an opponent in the first pce. The Duchess’s natural arrogance made it impossible for her to see me as anything other than excrement standing in her path.

  Today I learned that belief survived even when there was evidence to the contrary.

  It made me more cautious. While having more room to move without suspicion, the Duchess would notice and become wary if I did anything that challenged her beliefs too much. I also needed to be careful of things I considered true.

  Or had she noticed but wasn’t doing anything so she could observe further?

  It was tiring trying to guess what others were thinking.

  I didn’t know if I had an overactive imagination seeing every shadow as a monster. Or if I wasn’t cautious enough and every gust of wind held poison.

  “We’d hoped that you may be a te bloomer and a subsequent test would show some magical talent, but….” The Duchess sipped her tea. She was blond-haired, gold-eyed, slim-figured, big-busted, and wore enough jewels to buy a city. She looked like an older version of Tracy. Selena remained an uncommon beauty.

  I hadn’t looked the Duke in the face, so I didn’t know what he looked like. Wasn't that sad? Two lifetimes and the only thing I could say was his eyes were blue and his hair bck. It would be funny if his features were the major contributor to Selena’s appearance. I refused to think it had anything to do with mine.

  I was even less inclined to think they came from my mother, who sold me when I was a child. At least I was worth ten thousand Sargonian Seyche. I don’t know what a nomadic tribe needed that much money for, especially one famed for valuing their offspring.

  My mother was a touchy subject. I didn't understand how I felt about her. Some part of me hated her, but not enough to take off the pendant she gave me as a child.

  “Everyone knows the Ka tribe for their pink hair, red eyes, and blessings from Avea, which made them only able to give birth to daughters. But did you know they are all blessed water mages?” She sighed, her body tensing as if her shoulder couldn’t manage the weight added. “Sargos is like many countries. They favor boys over girls, with most inheritances falling to the eldest son despite the ws stating that the eldest child should inherit. After all, who can help it if the eldest daughter marries early?” Her eyes gazed into the distance, and the tone of her voice dropped low, becoming bnd. “The only exception is in the face of power.”

  I wanted to say she was bitter or angry, but I couldn’t pick up on her emotions. I knew nothing about the Duchess. If not for Lady Rintour, I wouldn't know her name. That was a big mistake. Didn't Marcus always say something about knowing the enemy was the first step to victory?

  Her gold eyes focused on me. A smile on her lips, a flick of her wrist, and her tea was on my face.

  I sputtered. The liquid wasn't boiling, but it was warm enough to burn.

  “Asha.”

  One of the three maids—who stood to the side—wearing a mask of indifference, stepped forward, holding out a potion.

  I reached for it, but she pulled her hand back. There was nothing in her eyes as she looked at me. I was a job, and she had no feelings about it past making sure it didn't happen to her.

  “Asha, give the potion to her. What if it scars? Her wedding is right around the corner.” The Duchess tutted. “Such a spoiled child. You must understand, Jal. Asha is a Baroness in her own right and is a little willful.”

  “I understand, Mother,” I lied. I took a little pleasure from her lip curling, even as calling her mother left a bitter taste in my mouth, but we both knew I had to address her as such.

  There was no way Asha would behave like this without the Duchess permitting it.

  Another maid stepped forward, fixing a fresh cup of tea.

  The Duchess sipped at it. “You have no power and should be clear on who to follow and respect. Cherish the marriage your father arranged. If you do anything stupid, you'll regret it.”

  If I wanted to say nothing had changed, it would be a lie since we never had this meeting, but simultaneously I felt something off in the interaction. The Duchess was like an actor too zy to py their part right, but confident the audience wouldn’t notice.

  “When the weather clears, you can go into town this once, but after that, stay in the castle and focus on your studies. You now have a full schedule. Viscountess Rintour suggested we increase your etiquette lessons and give you basic magic lessons, which I agreed on. I’m not expecting miracles, but I expect a marked improvement. In a month, Baron Smolt will come for his first chaperoned date. The Crown Prince will also visit Selena, so be on your best behavior.”

  My heart stopped. If the Baron was coming, then the other wasn’t far behind. I wasn’t ready to see the Crown Prince. I doubt I ever would be.

  The thought of him left me cmmy and shivering as I staggered out of the room.

  ***

  “It’s a boy!”

  The room stilled before there was an explosion of whispers. The midwife held the baby away, fear on her face.

  “What are you doing?” My voice was weak as I y on the bed, my legs still up. I felt the need to push, and that area was numb, but I reached for my child, anyway. “Give him here.” I was the only person looking forward to his birth. I couldn't say there wasn't any shock hearing that it was a boy, but my happiness was too much to contain.

  I lifted my arms. They hurt and trembled, almost taking too much effort to keep up, but I grit my teeth.

  The woman holding the baby took ginger steps as though she was carrying a loptak instead of a baby.

  “Isn’t she from the Ka Tribe? How can she give birth to a boy?” The maids were standing by the entrance of the tent, huddling together. Soldiers' shouts pierced the night as the Holy Nation did another night raid.

  I held the tiny child, his little arms waving as he cried his teeny heart out. He was an ugly thing. The blood and slime were still on him, and he was red with a patch of bck hair sticking to his forehead. I loved him. I loved him so much my heart couldn’t bear it. “It’s a miracle,” I said, but no one believed me.

  Madam Belnavis wasn't amused. She came closer, a frown distorting her features. “Someone go, tell His Majesty the Emperor. That thing is proof she’s been fornicating with the devil. Didn’t the diviner say something is impeding the glory of His Majesty?”

  The words chill my soul. I gnce at the people in the room. There was no one here on my side. Even if they were, the terror of being on the battlefield and constantly watching people die had whittled away at any compassion they might have. They needed something to believe in.

  They’d kill him and then me. The Emperor needed an excuse for why the soldiers, famed for being the best in the world, were losing. It was also a convenient excuse to rid himself of the wife he long considered baggage.

  My presence didn't impede anyone's glory. Nor did my son's. I didn't know how he came to be, but his father’s incompetence and cruelty were why Sargos was losing the war. An Emperor with a million capable servants can ruin a country, not to mention Sargos, which was hollow after a civil war. No matter what the Pope said, I found it impossible to believe that the Emperor was rich in blessings and destined to rule over everything, unifying the continent.

  ***

  I don’t know how I left the room or what she said to me after.

  The healing potion was in my hand. My face was tender to the touch, but I ignored it, walking blindly and trying to extricate myself from the fog of the past.

  I ran that night. That small thing clutched to my chest.

  If I were more courageous, I would have left before that. There were opportunities, but I was used to my prison of suffering, and anything outside was too frightening.

  That war was a concern, but I would be fine if I stayed in the Duchy. Anyone capable sought shelter in the Amber Duchy during the civil war as it kept its doors closed throughout the conflict.

  They didn’t even respond to the threat of the Holy Nation.

  After walking in circles, I made my way back to my room.

  A wave of my hand had Catherine scuttling out of the room. I watched her retreating form, wondering not for the first time if I should change my strategy regarding her.

  The longer I watched her and Madeline, the more I felt their goals differed from the Duchess. They either had their own agenda or worked for someone else. Catherine was also working on something, using Jal as an excuse to be out and about the castle.

  I sighed, examining the problem. Yes, I needed to stay in the Duchy by marrying Baron Smolt, but there was no way the Duke wasn’t involved in helping Selena get out of her marriage.

  Why engage her with the scum prince in the first pce?

  I'd asked myself that question a thousand times, but couldn't find an answer. Did the Duke recognize the stirrings of war and didn't want the duchy to be involved?

  Then again, who proposed marriage first?

  Did the royal family approach the Duke?

  It was possible. If the Queen Dowager wanted the Duke's military talents and soldiers, tying the two families together was a good pn. But, if they didn't agree to the wedding, the Duke's position was secure enough that he could've said no. They weren't afraid of war. They'd closed the duchy after the bride switch and the royal army didn't successfully attack the territory.

  Another possibility was that they targeted me, but I found that hard to believe.

  There was also my brother who I hadn't seen.

  The Duchess's comments about daughters not inheriting unless they were strong.

  Then there were the fshbacks.

  How often my memories of the past trapped me had decreased, but when it happened, it was worse and left me shaking, with no way to distinguish time or pce.

  I had ninety-nine problems and no solutions.

  I recalled the conversation with the Duchess, picking out the worrying points.

  The Viscountess Rintour suggested I take magic csses. It could be petty revenge or something more. There was no reason for her to mention the Crown Prince’s visit, and why were their meetings so close together?The Baron could visit tomorrow since he lived in the Duchy. It was ridiculous for him to come on the same day as the prince.

  I bit my lip.

  They wanted me to meet the crown prince, and from my conversation with the Duke, they guided me towards him.

  How did I get so close to the Crown Prince and Selena on their date? Damn. They set me up. As early as the first meeting, they crafted a narrative of me being jealous of Selena and in love with the Prince.

  That reminded me—I had met with the Duchess around this time in my past life.

  What was it about?

  I pressed my hand to my forehead…skipping lessons. I'd stormed out of my lessons with the Viscountess. The memory came back slowly. That got me seven days' punishment—after being told about my marriage, I protested by not attending csses.

  I looked at the potion in my hand. I’d said something to the Duchess that day and got tea thrown at me too. It was as pnned and scripted as my meeting with the Duke. Fate had destined this potion and me to meet. At least the Duchess healed me.

  I pulled out the cork and tipped it back.

  [Anomaly detected. Qi dispersing agent found.]