"Okay, so. Erika, you're going to sit there and not speak for a while. And Alice, you're also going to sit there and not talk for a while," Bridgette began, pinching her nose with frustration. "And I'm going to have to lecture the two of you like I'm a fucking preschool teacher." She spun, pointing a finger at Erika, "Nope, don't even. I saw you opening your mouth to wisecrack, maybe ask if you're going to get spanked for misbehaving or some other ridiculous shit, and the answer is Fuck you, no, shut up."

  Erika pouted, crossing her arms and slouching in her chair, gring at Alice. Alice was pointedly ignoring the pink-haired witch, doing her best to pretend she wasn't in the same room as the witch while sitting regally at her position at the head of the table. Her royal attitude was slightly ruined by the fact that the near-translucent white crop top t-shirt was letting the bottom half of her breasts hang free and Fi had rewritten the shirt's message to read "Grumpy Until Fucked," which caused both Erika and Bridgette to howl with ughter and Alice to swear at them both.

  "So here's the backstory, Erika," Bridgette began. "We traveled out west st year, Alice, Colin, and me. I don't think you've met Colin, but he's our elven wizard buddy. We went to high school together. We were trying to find more challenging battles to grow in power, which Fi had asked Alice to do, so figured the mountains would be a good start. About halfway to the mountains, we ran across a small town - about as big as Persistence is now - named Danville. The couple that owned it were some really nice folks named Dan and Jenni. We hung out for a day, made friends, then left for Wyoming."

  "On our way back, Xavier and his buddies - including two assholes who we also went to high school with through random coincidence - ended up ying a bunch of bad hoodoo curses on Jenni. Alice and Colin barely managed to untangle it, nearly killed all three of them. But when talking with everyone after the fact, it sounded like Xavier's group had originally been down by Vegas somewhere, then went up to Canada for some reason, maybe hunting like we went to Wyoming, no idea. Then they were headed back down to Vegas when they hit Danville and cursed Jenni."

  "So anyway, that's when we learn about him - he immediately goes to the top of our Assholes To Murder list,"

  "You have a list called that?," Erika interjected, curious.

  "No," said Alice at the same time Bridgette answered, "Yes." The two women gred at each other briefly before Bridgette shrugged.

  "Okay, no, we don't. But we should, and if we did, he'd be on it," Bridgette bargained. "Anyway. I don't think we were maybe so explicit about it, but generally agreed that if we ever crossed paths with him, we'd kill him. We know he's got our two assholes from school and then a creepy mage in a dirty bathrobe who did the cursing, but otherwise not a lot of information about him from that encounter. Which is when we ran into Warren, which takes us to part two of this."

  She took a deep breath and continued, "So we got back from out west to discover that this other creep we'd run into before, a guy named Warren who Alice had scared off, came back while we were out of town, killed our friend Jacob, and kidnapped another friend, Becky. He'd also made a reference to knowing our ex-friends, which we didn't put together at the time. Then we tracked Warren down in, wrecked his whole operation, killed a bunch of people, rescued close to twenty captive women, and stole all of his journals."

  "Sve girls?," Erika asked, perking up.

  "No need to get your panties wet thinking about helpless women to ravage," Alice said nastily. "That's not how we roll."

  "Oh fuck you, Raven," Erika shot back. "I was going to say great fucking job rescuing downtrodden women and how I was gd that you had the opportunity to use your power for good, and how I wished I had been offered simir opportunities, but sit on this and twist," she said, raising her middle finger toward Alice.

  "LADIES," Bridgette roared. "Shut the fuck up!" Alice and Erika resumed their previous positions, gring daggers at each other.

  "Not like either of you are listening to me anymore, but anyway. Colin went through the journals, figured out that Warren was working with Xavier, and we got some clues on where to track Xavier down next, but we were waiting until the summer to head out because it looked like it wasn't just a location, it was a specific date that Warren was supposed to meet up as well. We were actually going to leave in about two weeks."

  "Perfect," Erika said. "I'm coming." Bridgette snickered at the potentially unintended double entendre while Alice stood and smacked her hand on the table.

  "Absolutely not, sorry. We'll let you know how it goes, but you're not going to be traveling with us."

  "Fuck you, then I'll follow you. Every step you take, every move you make, I'll be watching you, Raven. I'm coming with you, and I'm going to find Xavier, and I'm going to get him to tell me where Victor is, and I'm going to kill that motherfucker. It's the least I can do for Yuki."

  "What part of 'No' isn't making it into that empty head of yours? The answer is fucking no,", Alice snarled, losing her temper again. "I don't like you and I don't want you traveling with us. You don't know us, how we fight, and you'd be a liability. Absolutely not."

  "Babe," Bridgette began. "We could try to practice with her over the next two weeks. You know we said after Warren that we needed to be more cautious and stronger to prevent disasters."

  Alice spun on Bridgette, her face crimson with rage. "Whose side are you on, Bridgette? Mine or this fucking imbecile? I said no."

  "Woah, okay," Bridgette said, holding her hands up. "Easy there. You know I'm on your side, I'm just saying maybe there's a middle ground. She could have useful information, skills, stuff like that and unless we spend time learning, we won't know. I'd rather have more information than less."

  "I knew I liked you, Red," Erika said with a grin, leaning forward and throwing a flirty wink at the redhead. "I'm happy to spend time exchanging knowledge with you, if you know what I mean."

  "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Alice roared. "NOW!" Her eyes were bzing pink and an invisible wind was starting to cause her hair to blow.

  "Just go," Bridgette said to Erika, sighing. "Ask anyone in town about the temporary lodging. We can maybe talk tomorrow."

  "OUT NOW!" Alice screamed, pointing at the door. Erika slowly got out of her chair, intentionally knocking it over as she stood. She slowly picked it up, scooting it in to the table, ensuring it made as much noise as possible as it scraped across the wood floor. Erika then turned, started to walk toward the front door, stopped and patted at her sides as if she forgot something, turned back to look at the two women, flipped her middle fingers at Alice, and then walked quickly out the door, smming it as hard as she possibly could.

  Alice stood there, panting with exertion at just how much rage she felt in her body. Bridgette walked over and put an arm around her, which Alice immediately shoved off her. Alice turned and gred at her lover.

  "You're supposed to be on my side, you know. Just because some funking skank winks at you and makes some lewd comments does not mean you ditch me. That is so unacceptable."

  "Babe, I am on your side. Always, forever, truly. Erika is batshit crazy, I think we can agree on that. But I do think we can, maybe tomorrow when everyone has had a good night's sleep, consider if maybe there's a way she could help us find and fight Xavier. But that can be a tomorrow problem."

  "The only tomorrow problem is if you're still sleeping in my house, B. I'm fucking serious. That wasn't okay."

  Bridgette turned, pinning Alice to the wall. "A, you're grumpy and horny. I know it, Fi knows it, and you know it. I'm sure Erika did too and was intentionally pushing your buttons. Let's go forget about the witch and have ourselves a fun night, okay?"

  WhimsicalLantern