Chapter 2: Empathy

  “Oh my God, it’s so good~!” I bit down on the squirming giant fish and ripped out another chunk of meat! It was a perch, I think? Something shiny and silvery on the outside, but delicious and pink meat on the inside. It’s funny because when I was a human, I would feel bad about killing a cockroach, yet I was totally fine with tearing apart a living fish now.

  Revenge clouds guilt and empathy. A useful emotion.

  Yeah, sure, whatever. Anyway, this fucking fish tried to eat me and nearly bit my damn tail off, so I give zero shits about how much it suffers before dying. Besides, fish are assholes. Not just fish, but a lot of animals eat their prey alive. It’s totally normal…

  “Fuck.” I let out a sigh and finally dug my left cw into the bastard’s brain. The body of the fish was still wiggling around for a while after that. Even as I tore apart the spine in multiple pces… Fish are weird.

  Eventually my stomach got full, so I pushed the carcass into the river and watched it get ripped apart by a bunch of other fish. Big ones and small ones. Nature is beautiful like that.

  Need to make a ir now.

  “Ah yes, the dragon’s ir. I’d rather just sunbathe to be honest.” Ignoring my impulse to dig a hole and hide away from the world, I decided to just pick a comfy warm rock and y down to rest. Seriously, it feels amazing just ying on a hot stone and drifting off into a dreamnd…

  “Kaaw~!” The noise woke me up immediately! I looked over and saw a few crows fighting over a green lizard that was still alive and struggling to escape from their beaks. I hesitated for a moment.

  Pointless.

  “I know.” I said that, but I still darted over and scared the two seagulls away! The green lizard looked at me with its big bck eyes. It kinda looked like a gecko? Then it just kinda… Laid there and slowly died. Well, they broke a lot of bones and the poor bastard was also missing a leg and a tail… It’s not surprising. Death is normal.

  Not the same kind. Meaningless empathy.

  “I know, I know. Not a dragon, just a random lizard.” I sighed dramatically and pushed the carcass into the water, where it was devoured by a fish in one bite. I beat my wings a few times and gained a little lift, but didn’t start flying. Just went up onto my fingers and toes for a second, before falling again.

  Climb. Glide. Simple.

  “It is simple, but it’s still scary as fuck when you’re the size of a goddamn gecko and the tree is like a skyscraper!” I actually haven’t even tried to climb a tree yet. Though I’m sure I could… I probably should. But I’m kinda tired now.

  Lair.

  “Lair… Or a nest.” I looked up to a tree branch that was dangling over the water right above me. The green leaves seemed tasty to my lizard brain, but I haven’t eaten any veggies or fruit with this body yet. Hopefully I’m an omnivore. It would be kinda me if I could only eat meat.

  I scampered over so fast that it felt like the wind was whipping my scales and I had to tighten my wings against my body to avoid lifting off the ground! Was I really moving fast? Uh, not really, but retive to my size it was really impressive. Then I jumped and my four cws dug into the bark on the side of the trunk! I was at least a foot above the ground, which was several times my body length! Not including the tail, but whatever.

  “This is so cool…” I extended my wings by instinct. Then I looked over at them… My scales are bck for the most part, but the webbing of my bat-like wings are pinkish red and veiny. It was really weird, because bat wings are basically just like gigantic hands with super long fingers. There are cws at the tips and even a thumb with a nail. So it felt a lot like having really gigantic webbed hands. They were strong and pretty durable, but still delicate compared to my normal cwed hands. As for the feet, they just kinda felt like feet. I didn’t think about it so much.

  Move.

  “What’s the fucking rush?” I don’t know why I’m compining to myself for making me rush. Guess it just reminded me of my mother… Ugh, I’ve been isekai’d, there’s no point thinking about past trauma and drama. This is everything I ever wanted, okay, not everything, but at the very least, being reborn as a dragon is in my top 10 Isekai fantasies.

  Of course, the type of dragon is debatable. Some are much cooler or practical than others. Like a Wyvern is probably more realistic in the sense that I’d have wings instead of arms and be some kinda bat-bird-lizard. Right now I’m just a bat-lizard at most. Actually, my body feels more cat or dog-like, while my neck is kinda long, but not super long… The tail is thick and long, without any special spikes anywhere on my body. No spines or horns, yet. Might be a puberty thing really.

  The question is whether I even ‘want’ horns and spikes? Are they even that useful? I have cws after all. When I reach my full size, I won’t need to ram anyone or use spines to protect myself from predators… Okay, I have no idea how long it takes to grow to ‘full size’ or whether my full size is actually normal dragon standards. I’m gonna be so fucking pissed if it turns out that I can’t get any bigger than a squirrel.

  Smaller body, less food needed to survive, lighter, retively faster…

  Okay, I know that, but still, I was ‘short’ in my st life. In this one, I’d rather be a big beefy dragon-puppy, okay?

  “Also, holy shit is this tree massive!” Seriously though, I was scampering up the side at a pretty rapid pace, but even after several minutes I was only about half-way up the side. I guess I don’t need to reach the top though.

  I looked over at the nearest branch and dropped down onto it, wobbling a bit and instinctively cmping my cws down into the bark! My wings spread and fpped a little, making my heart race! I thought I was gonna fall! The branch is really thick though. My wingspan is about the same length as my head to tail, so maybe four inches?

  Only three and a half.

  Whatever! Three or four inches, it doesn’t matter. We, no, ‘I’ am tiny as fuck right now. I don’t like it at all. I really need to grow but… Aside from that, what else? What am I actually supposed to do?

  We don’t need others to validate our existence constantly. We exist. The end.

  “No, it’s not ‘the end’ for fuck’s sake.” I rolled my big… Eyes, I don’t even know my eye color yet. I know they’re big for the size of my head though. Hopefully pretty cute looking. Just need to find a reflective surface. The river didn’t work out very well. Too ripply and with fish jumping out of it trying to bite my head off.

  I’m actually a little scared to find out. I had brown eyes in my st life and they always felt a little… Mundane? I don’t know. Maybe it’s just my usual body dysmorphia and obsessive compulsive disorder, but I always felt like my dark brown eyes weren’t as interesting as brighter eyes. Blue, green, gray, basically any light-colored irises would be preferable. But then again, I knew a lot of girls that had beautiful brown or even nearly ‘bck’ irises.

  The eyes are always greener on the other side.

  “That doesn’t sound right.” I snickered and breathed in deeply. I washed off the snake and bird gore in the river, but I forgot to wash my mouth and snout after the fish… I guess it’s fine though. I can smell fish on my breath, but I can also still smell blood from a deer that was getting disemboweled by some wolves about a kilometer downstream. No, I can’t tell they’re wolves by the smell, I can literally just see them from up here in the tree.

  I looked up at the blue sky and smiled wryly, “At least I can still smile. My facial muscles feel pretty… Flexible.” I touched my cheeks and snout, then rubbed my smooth bald head.

  One of my fears was always going bald, but now I don’t feel like I have any hair on my body. Might also be temporary though. A lot of dragons have been depicted with beards and hair. Not sure if I want horns or hair though. Being smooth might be better for swimming and flying after all.

  Not sure whether I have much say in the matter though. Usually people can’t manipute their genes so easily. Not saying it’s impossible, but the level of genetic manipution usually isn’t so dramatic. Even in the wildest of ‘normal’ Earth animals.

  “Where’s a good spot to make a nest anyway?” I walked along the branch that was much thicker than my body for what looked and felt like a hundred meters from my perspective. Though it was probably only three or four meters at most. I was walking slowly so it took a while.

  Steal one.

  I looked over and saw a gigantic bird nest, which had a few massive eggs inside.

  Future rations.

  “I’m not eating babies or eggs. It’s not even slightly necessary.” I still have some fucking morals, okay? One of them includes hurting or killing baby animals. Humans are also animals. Basically I don’t wanna hurt babies or kids if I can avoid it. No matter the species.

  Unnecessary compassion.

  “Anyway, I’m not hungry at the moment, just a little sleepy. I need to find a pce to hide and rest.” In the end, I went back to the trunk of the tree and started digging into the side with my cws. I didn’t have to go very deep. Only a few inches… But when I curled up and tried to get comfy, I started getting coated in tree sap…

  “Okay, this was a dumb idea.” I sighed dramatically and crawled out of the hole. I licked my face and eyes clean first, noticing that the sap actually tasted decent. At least it didn’t make me sick, but it wasn’t particurly delicious. I continued licking and cleaning off my body for a few minutes, then extended my wings and fpped them a few times…

  *Vooosh~!* A gust of strong wind suddenly appeared!

  “Aaaah!” I screamed instinctively as I flipped around randomly in the air! I closed my wings and spread my limbs wide! It took a second or so to get a better orientation, then I spread my wings again and my speed slowed down a lot!

  *Plop!* Okay, I immediately hit the water. Thankfully I was right over the water and not some concrete… Though with how light and durable my body is, I’d probably still be fine. I’m not really sure yet and don’t really wanna test it out.

  “Owowowow~! Bitch~!” I scrambled out of the water with a fucking crab pinching my tail! It was only half my size, probably a baby crab, but it was so strong! I twisted back and dug my talons through its stupid face! Even when I ripped its brain to pieces, the damn cw was still cmped down onto my tail!

  Minimal damage. Over-exaggerating.

  “It fucking hurts, okay?” I pried the cw off my tail and it felt a little bruised but the scales weren’t damaged on the outside. In other words, it’s not like I was some invincible monster… To be fair though, if I was a gecko, I probably would’ve lost half my tail. So at least I’m better off than those unlucky bastards.

  “Ow.” I groaned and moaned as usual when I’m injured or in pain. I mean, who doesn’t?

  Attracting predators. Silence.

  “I feel like that voice in my head has been getting progressively more autistic. No, maybe I’m the autistic one and they’re the normal one?” I shrugged my draconic wings and then wiggled my body to get rid of the water. It was nice and warm out, so it’s not like I was cold, but it was more of an instinct.

  We need to urinate.

  “Umm…” That reminds me. I didn’t really think about it much, but am I still a dude? Don’t get me wrong, I’d be fine being a female dragon, whatever, but it’s still something kinda important to know ahead of time. If I’m a lizard, do I have two dicks inside my slit?

  These are important questions, okay?