Dear Diary,

  So yesterday I wound up finally getting through to my problem children enough to get them working together enough to at least be able to dance together. I also discovered that they may have been practicing their dancing coordination by doing the horizontal mambo. Okay, 'may have been' is kind of disingenuous, since they kinda admitted it. Now I've got to figure out what I have to do report that, since it's apparently something worth noting. Shit, I wonder if I need to do the same for Ryan and Chloros. I mean, everyone involved is an adult, and I'm pretty sure nobody gets dinged for it, and I'm absolutely certain that 'conflict of interest' is something everyone just kind of assumes everyone has no matter what they're doing, but something tells me I still ought to let the folks that care about things know about it.

  Shit, I just realized why I need to. Not because 'oh, the Cadets are fucking, foul, foul' or any bullshit like that, but as I mentioned to the Senior Cadets on the ride along, our Heroic martial tradition is based on the Sacred Brotherhood of Thebes, and admission to the Sacred Brotherhood required that the candidate be fuckin' somebody in the Brotherhood. I sure as shit don't want one of the Cadets nominally under my care to get passed over for promotion because the 'will fuck, will fight' box wasn't checked because I failed to report shit properly.

  Of course, that's why I told Siobhan I needed to talk to her. At least part of why. The other part being that I want to be sure Hildegarde isn't screwing herself up in ways I could prevent or at least mitigate by doing something that's not out of line for a Patron or a decent human being. Because I'm sure there's shit that Patrons are allowed or even expected to do that, y'know, I'd need to find a way to beat the shit out of myself again if I did them. I mean, my High Priestesses I've at least given them a no-wiggle direct order to do as they will, so if they're doing me, it's because they will. Because they want to. I hope.

  Okay, gonna step away from that line of thinking, because I'm not sure it's healthy. I'll talk with Siobhan about that, too. Possibly gonna talk to Saffron about it again. Really hope they don't get bored with me doing that. Then again, when they get fed up they usually find a way to shut me up that involves my mouth doing something they enjoy, so, I dunno, maybe it's foreplay.

  Yesterday when I got done with class, I sent Citron and Hildegarde on to dinner, thanked Larry with a big old back slapping bro hug before sending him home, and held Vickerson back until the rest of the Cadets left.

  "What did you need, Ma'am?"

  I chuckled. "Hungry? Don't worry about missing out, I'll ask Marie to make sure you get whatever you need to fill up on." She kinda spluttered something about favoritism, and I held up a hand. "I'd do that for any Cadet I kept from a meal, Cadet Vickerson. So..."

  Mittens? Could you make sure Cadet Vickerson gets enough to eat? I'm not sure how long I'm gonna keep her up here.

  Watch?

  I chuckled. I'm not doing anything like that, oh, she who desperately needs to be wifed into submission.

  Yes.

  Okay, okay, I can take a hint. I'm working on it. Meanwhile, make sure Vickerson doesn't miss out on getting her nutrition? I got the mental impression of a nod, and turned back to the Cadet herself. "Okay, Marie will make sure you're not underfed just because I'm keeping you back here."

  She tilted her head. "Did you do that for Citron and Hildegarde when you kept them back?"

  I snorted. "I doubt either of them would let being late to dinner stop them from getting food."

  "Sounds a little like special treatment to me, Ma'am."

  I nodded, "yeah, it might sound that way. But it's not preferential treatment. I'm just tailoring how I'm treating you based on my read of each of you. Which is kind of what I kept you here to talk about."

  I waited until she said, "yes, Ma'am?"

  "I've been really focused on those two, and haven't spent much time one on one with you over the past few weeks."

  She shrugged. "I haven't really needed it, I don't think."

  "Yeah, but you're the best student in the class, and I'd be doing you a disservice if I didn't spend at least a little time making sure you're advancing as fast as you can."

  She looked a little taken aback by that. "Me? The best student in the class? Either of them could wipe the floor with me."

  "Yeah, probably. Meanwhile if I give each of them ten cadets and give you whoever's left, I'm pretty sure your team would win any competition I put you in. On top of that, I don't think anybody but those two is even a match for you."

  "Oh, Brown is fairly good, and there are a couple others who..." She trailed off as I grinned at her.

  "See what I mean? You even know your fellow classmate's strengths and weaknesses. I've definitely been dropping the ball with you." I paused in thought for a second, and she just stood there, waiting mostly patiently, while I thought out loud. "Okay, I'm gonna need to work one on one at least a little with everyone in class. I'm also gonna need to carve out some more time for working directly with you. I also need to make sure our dynamic duo doesn't slip back into their bickering. So, I'm gonna give you a special assignment. While I work my way through the rest of the Cadets in class, I'd like you to keep an eye on those two. Nothing really intrusive, just keep them from getting back at once another's throats."

  A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

  "I... I can do that, Ma'am."

  I nodded. "Okay. I'll also be taking some class time to work directly with you, both in terms of Physical Training and Combat Training. I get that as a Soldier, you focused on working in groups, right?" She nodded. "That's fantastic, and I think going forward the Alliance is going to wind up with more small groups of Heroes deploying together, but you'll need to make sure not only that you aren't the weakest link in a group of Heroes, but that in, say, a Unit of Volunteers, you're the Hero they need leading them."

  "Yes, Ma'am. I understand, Ma'am. I'll... I'll try to find more time to practice, Ma'am."

  I shook my head. "Yeah, no, I'm pretty sure you're not slacking. Don't short yourself on food or sleep, and don't let your other grades fall by the wayside. I..." I thought about what Citron and Hildegarde had done, and while I absolutely wasn't about to start fucking Vickerson to improve her physical and combat readiness, I definitely could maybe steal some time from her Patron. If they didn't like it, they could come discuss it with me. Briefly. "What's your Devotional day?"

  "Freysday, Ma'am."

  That surprised me a little. "Freya's your Patron?"

  "No, Ma'am."

  I kind of realized I might be pushing into private information territory here, but she could always tell me to go get bent or something. Or lie to me, depending on who her Patron was, I guessed. I thought about what other Deities would have Friday as their Devotional day. "Uh, wait, are you... Is Aphrodite your Patron?"

  "No, Ma'am!" She sounded a little put out by that. Offended I'd assumed. I thought about what other Love Deities might be...

  Look, I was still getting used to this shit, okay? Not sure if I'll ever really be used to it. I sighed, shook my head, and said, "really?"

  "Yes, Ma'am!" I even felt a little bit of Worship coming from her.

  I shook my head. "How many of you guys... Wait, is that rude to ask?"

  "You don't know?"

  I threw my hands up in the air. "I'm still new at this! I mean, seriously, there's no instruction book or anything. Yeah, Dad gives me tips and shit, but in general? I'm figuring this out as I go. I guess if one of you got me a bunch of Glory I might twig to it, but..." I trailed off. "What's your best guess? Estimate, at least?"

  "No more than half, Ma'am."

  I nearly choked hearing that, but I put on a smile for her, because she fuckin' deserved one. "Well. Glad to have you. And I mean that both in the group of you sense and in the you in particular sense. That does make things a little easier though." When she cocked her head, I said, "from now on, unless I get wrapped up with something else, I'll be spending Fridays training you one-on-one. Up here in the Practice Yard if I can, back at the Homestead in the courtyard if the Practice Yard is in use and we can't cadge a corner of it."

  "That's..."

  "What your Instructor and Patron thinks is appropriate, what with you proving yourself to be one of the top Cadets of your class."

  She swallowed whatever she'd been about to say. "Yes, Ma'am."

  "Okay. Go get yourself some food. Barring something weird happening, I'll see you on Friday."

  "Yes, Ma'am!" She dashed off, and I stepped back home.

  More bear steaks. Should have figured. Also, bear soup. I really didn't want to know exactly what went into it, so I didn't ask. What with Marie making it, I definitely couldn't complain about the flavor.

  Same went for the after-Bath activities. My Murder Mittens, she affectionate. Meanwhile, as Marie filled most of my senses, Saffron did her dead level best to distract me. duBois off brand yoga for the win. Well, that and my Kitten's obscenely high Skills. After, like right after, like 'not quite done with aftershocks' after, she giggled, DING into my brain.

  My mouth still wasn't really available for comment, so I muzzily thought, really? What Skill?

  Yes!

  I just rolled my eyes and did the smart thing and let dopamine and endorphins carry me off to sleep.

  Marie or Saffron apparently carried me to bed, where I woke up way later than normal. Like, kids already gone, only Marie lying there gently combing out my hair with her claws late. "Oh, shit. Why didn't you guys wake me?"

  "Rest."

  I flopped back down. "Huh. Shouldn't I be, I dunno, hunting down whatever's been throwing Dire Bears at us?"

  "Scrying."

  "Saffron?" Marie nodded. "But she's got all her researching and Imperatoring to do!" Marie just stared at me, then adjusted me to get to some hair that had gotten trapped under me. "Okay, okay. She's better at Scrying than I am. I mean, I'm pretty sure I can brute force stuff, but... she can just pull my Mana if she needs that, can't she?" My Murder Mittens nodded again. "Anybody else looking for it?"

  "Me."

  I looked up at her. "You're hunting the thing too?" She nodded. "You make sure to stay safe, you hear me?" She just blepped at me, and I rolled my eyes. "I'll be very upset with you if you get hurt when you don't have to."

  She shrugged. "Sparagmos."

  "I can't..."

  She rolled her eyes. "Saffron."

  "Oh. Yeah, I guess. But you can't be Sparagmosed if you're digesting in a Dire Bear belly. Or any other kind of belly."

  No idea why, but at the word 'belly', she got a goofy look, and when I repeated it, it only got worse. When I gave her the hairy eyeball, she leaned over, twisting herself to hover her lips a hair's breadth from mine. "Round."

  It took me a second then I snorted. "You're... Has my Murder Mittens gotten baby crazy?" She nodded. "Baby fever?" She nodded again, and blepped so the tip of her tongue tapped my lips. "Are you feeling a deep and abiding need to have a baby make that belly of yours round?" She wrinkled up her nose and shook her head. I might have frowned just a little. "Why not?"

  "Babies!"

  I might have giggled at her a little when she said that. "So, you still scared of being married to us?"

  She closed up just the tiniest bit, almost as if part of it was a coy act, but I caught the edges of real fear under it. "Maybe."

  "You still sure you want to?"

  "Yes!"

  I realized something right there, and hid my smile for just a moment. "You know you could have everything you've asked for without the whole wedding, if that's what you want, right?" She nodded. "But you still want it?" She ginned and nodded again. "So, you really, really wanna do the whole bride thing?" More nodding, now with blepping that kept her tongue flickering across my lips. "Then you want me to mark you and despoil you and impregnate you?"

  "Babi..."

  Look, she was way too cute not to kiss at that point. Also, the bed we slept on hadn't ever been used for adult activities, and that was sad, so we corrected that right then and there, while all the kids were out doing kid things.

  It was very, very restful. Which is an absolute lie, but that's my story, and it was sticky. Sweat's sticky, right?