Ten, Spring Day Cool

  That night, Xuan Ling stayed in the Hua Fei's Miao Xiu Palace, but after Hua Fei was reinstated, although Xuan Ling still took care of her and rewarded her as before, when it came to pampering, she was ultimately not as good as before.

  I don't really care about how good or pampered Huafeng is to Xuanling at this moment. Huafeng and the people behind her have long become a thorn in Xuanling's heart that he cannot wait to get rid of as soon as possible. No matter how glorious they appear on the surface, they are ultimately doomed to be eliminated.

  So I tolerated Hua Fei exceptionally well, no matter how coldly she treated me in front of others. I just adhered to the proper etiquette and secretly suppressed that sharp hatred silently.

  It turns out that the longer you hate, the more you can tolerate.

  I had just gotten up early and was putting on my clothes, about to do my hair, when I turned around to see Xuan Ling smiling and standing behind me, staring at me. I couldn't help but scold him, "Your Majesty always likes to sneak in quietly like this, trying to scare people."

  He said: "You get up early in the morning when people are still dizzy, and you can't stand loud noises. When you hear them, your heart will be annoyed. I don't know?"

  I heard him being so considerate of my little habits, and I felt a few touches of affection in my heart. "Your Majesty has come over so early, I haven't even finished washing up yet, it's not suitable for me to meet you looking like this."

  He smiled, "You can dress up now, I'll just watch from here." As he spoke, he leaned back onto the bed, smiling at me with a gentle gaze.

  I smiled and turned my head, not paying attention to him. I took some scented powder, rouge, and eyebrow pencil, and carefully applied them. Normally, I wouldn't have bothered with such details, but just lightly brushed my eyebrows and applied a bit of makeup.

  Xuan Ling smiled and said: "I have seen other women put on makeup, but before and after putting it on, they look like two different people."

  I couldn't help but laugh and said: "Isn't that great, Your Majesty has one person but gets two, a double-sided beauty, it's clear how deep your good fortune is."

  Xuan Ling rested his chin on one hand and gazed at me with a smile, saying: "And you, it seems, have 'yet to be tainted by the worldly dust, lightly sweeping your eyebrows to pay respects to the revered one'."

  "I smiled and said: 'This is a compliment to the beauty of Madame Guo, I am not worthy of it.' I covered my mouth with a smile: 'I'm just lazy, tired of wasting time in front of the dressing table every day.'"

  I pulled up my hair, only tied a simple bun, and chose a good white jade pen with the word "shou" to pin on the bun. The jade is warm and elegant, white is noble but not showy, it's most suitable for daily use. This simple dress, not to flatter Xuan Ling, just thinking of going to Mei Zhuang's place, she dresses so plain, if I were to be too fancy, she wouldn't say anything, but must be heart-piercing.

  He, however, kept his gaze fixed on me, seemingly in a daze, and said: "Xuan Xuan."

  I nodded slightly and made a gesture for the palace maid serving in the hall to withdraw, then turned to ask: "What?"

  He didn't say a word, but stood up and picked up the eyebrow pencil on the dresser. He stood tall in front of me, I knew what he meant, and smiled softly: "Yes, Fourth Brother's favorite is indeed Far Mountain Ink."

  He contained four parts seriousness, three parts amusement, two parts sincerity, one part distraction, and stared intently at my eyes, drawing with a skilled hand.

  My heart felt a warm wave, just like the emotions of that day in Taiping Xinggong. His expression had not changed at all with the passage of time. His eyes were deep and affectionate, his tone was indulgent and sincere, saying: "Your makeup is still the same as before."

  I nodded and said softly: "Fourth Brother, do you still remember 'Jiāo Lí Zhuāng'?"

  His eyes moved, and he was silent for a moment. He took the brush from the small enamel box, dipped it in bright red rouge, and drew out the shape of a blooming pear flower. Then, he dipped it in shiny silver powder and dotted it with delicate stamens. The smile at the corner of his mouth shone brightly like flames, saying: "Of course, I won't forget."

  My heart has been softened and moved, having experienced so many things along the way. My feelings are no longer what they used to be. But when he painted his eyebrows, those few moments of genuine emotion revealed made me want to cry. He treated me coldly, but there must have been some sincerity in his emotions towards me. Just like how I was calculating and planning behind his back, yet when I turned around, my heart still had lingering attachments and reluctance to let go.

  I and he, can't bear it anymore, can't be apart. Looking back, past events are like smoke, but in the end, there must still be something that neither of us can let go of.

  My nose slightly sour, my eyes somewhat swollen, I unconsciously reached out to wrap my arms around his waist, my head tightly pressed against his chest, my heart filled with mixed emotions, bitter and sweet intertwined like a surging cloud.

  He gently kissed my forehead and sighed softly, "Silly girl."

  Perhaps I'm really foolish. I was ten years younger than him, and in those ten years, he had thousands of beauties and charming women around him. As for me, even with a hundred plans in my heart, the only thing that mattered to me was that tiny bit of genuine feeling.

  His arms still felt warm. In the light spring season, we all wore thin clothes, and the body temperature through our shirts was even more real and solid.

  In the courtyard, countless flowers bloomed, with red and green intertwined, truly a deep spring like the sea. After a long time, he finally let go of me, gently wiping away the tears on my face that had not yet dried, saying: "Why are you suddenly sad?"

  I let out a snort of laughter, wiped my eyes and said with a mischievous grin: "It's been many days since it last rained. I'm afraid Fourth Brother has forgotten what 'pear blossoms in the rain' look like, so I'll give him a special show."

  He gazed at me carefully and said: "You really are as lovely as a pear blossom, too simple and elegant."

  I glanced at myself in the copper mirror, then applied another layer of peach blossom rouge, and my cheeks were flushed like the dawn clouds dispersing. I then pinned a golden hairpin with a South Sea pearl to the back of my chignon, and the pearl shone like flowing water. He, however, plucked a crystal-clear, red, and tender double-peony flower and pinned it to the side of my chignon, smiling calmly: "The precious chignon suits you well, your lotus face is delicate, and your body is fragrant with a sweet scent. Your eyebrows don't need to be painted, heaven has taught them to grow long." (2) I gazed at him gently with half a smile and half a frown, and continued to recite: "Don't rely on your captivating beauty, marry a man who loves you. You are both young now, don't waste the good times." (2) His face was filled with spring colors and smiles, making his divine appearance even more radiant, and he pointed at the double-peony flower on my chignon, saying: "I and Xianxian are in our youth and good times, just like these flowers growing and blooming together."

  I don't know if it's the coolness of spring morning or the coolness in my heart, looking at the double-born and blooming sea hibiscus in my hair, as if the hustle and bustle and emotions were only those of the sea hibiscus, temporarily residing on my black hair. It has nothing to do with me, nor him.

  What's more, in our youthful years, I was beautiful but unfulfilled. And he, can be considered as my romantic lover?

  My heart sank slightly, and I wondered how Xuan Ling and I could be considered a perfect match. The women in the harem were all like flowers, but his hands that plucked them at will were unpredictable and self-indulgent. In the end, I couldn't believe it, nor did I dare to. Seeing his enthusiastic expression in the mirror, I couldn't bear to contradict him, so I just smiled faintly and said nothing.

  The spring light is like a delicate embroidery, unfolding a cloud brocade across the sky. In front of and behind the flower mirror, the flowers' faces reflect each other, his emotions are as deep as the mountains and rivers where their eyes meet, truly stirring one's heart.

  He whispered in my ear: "It's been a long time since I've heard the sound of Xuanxuan's guqin."

  I smiled and said, "Let's use this poem 'Good Times' as the lyrics for a new song."

  In the afternoon of this day, after Xuan Lingyi left, I hastily went to Mei Zhuang's Cunjutang.

  At this time, the sun was shining brightly in the middle of the day, with a gentle breeze and beautiful scenery. The Study of Preserved Chrysanthemum was quiet and empty, with no one inside. Only Huaiyue was seen lying on the stone couch outside the courtyard, covering her face with a feather fan and dozing off. I saw that she was sleeping soundly and didn't want to disturb her, so I quietly walked in through the flowers and willows.

  He walked to the window and faintly heard someone speaking, which seemed to be Wen Shi Chu's voice. He didn't want to enter rashly. Afraid that Cai Yue would wake up and suddenly see him and call out, he chose a dense tree to temporarily hide behind.

  I stood outside the silk window and faintly heard Wen Shi Chu say, "The young master's excessive phlegm is due to some internal heat, it would be good to eat some snow pears to moisten it, or duck pears are also fine, stew them with rock sugar, it's better than medicine. After all, medicine has three parts poison, the way of nourishing life is still in nurturing one's health."

  A faint sigh, and Mei Zhuang's voice was tinged with a hint of resentment, "Pears are also separated. Already in this place where one cannot be seen, do you still want me to eat pears? Who wants pears? It's better to let it dissipate the stagnant heat."

  The wind was quiet, and the flowers were also flying silently. After a long silence, Wen Shi suddenly said: "This is like a gamble. I'll write a prescription for the young master, and the young master can take it according to the medicine."

  After a long time, it seemed as if Mei Zhuang let out a faint sigh of relief, which felt like an occasional fleeting dream during an afternoon nap.

  In the courtyard, there is no one else, I stand alone behind a weeping willow, and unwittingly become lost in thought.

  The pale golden light of spring trickled through the sparse branches, casting a patchy and fragmented shadow on the smooth pebbles. Inside the house, all was quiet, but outside, the spring breeze rustled past an old pear tree, causing its flowers to fall to the ground with a soft "patter", "patter" sound. On this ordinary afternoon, I was suddenly moved by these few ordinary words, and for some reason, my heart felt muddled and confused, unable to take another step.

  In a moment, there was the sound of chairs moving inside, and I didn't want to face Wen Shi Chu in front of Mei Zhuang, nor did I dare to meet his gaze. Hurriedly, I quietly slipped away to hide behind a cluster of flowers and trees outside the hall. Only then did I see Mei Zhuang personally escorting Wen Shi Chu out, with Cai Yue following closely behind, still looking sleepy-eyed but trying to put on a brave face.

  Mei Zhuang stood in front of the Weihua Gate and smiled slightly: "Lord Wen, you left in such a hurry today, why not sit down and have another cup of tea before leaving?"

  Wen Shi made a slight bow and said, "Thank you, young master, for taking the trouble to move your jade steps. However, the medicine for the noble concubine is still being decocted, and I'm afraid that if the junior eunuchs are not careful, it will lose its efficacy after the time limit."

  Meizhuang's eyes slightly paused, then smiled and said: "Xin Guifei took great care in raising the emperor's daughter, her medicine indeed requires attention."

  Wen Shi said, "Young Master misunderstood. It's the 'Divine Jade Powder' of Imperial Consort Guan. Those little eunuchs are clumsy and afraid they'll ruin it, so I'd better go supervise."

  Meizhuang's face turned cold, and she smiled: "I thought who was it? It turns out to be my sister Gu. Only at this time, Gu is favored by the emperor, and naturally doesn't need to use 'divine fairy powder' to gain favor. Moreover, Gu is now in a high position, even the threshold of the palace gate will be trampled on, I as her elder sister still have to avoid suspicion, but you, sir, are eager to add flowers to brocade."

  Meizhuang's words were sharp and cutting, I was secretly shocked. Yesterday, after I spoke in the palace, Empress Dowager knew about Huafeng's reinstatement. Meizhuang's dissatisfaction with me is so deep? Wen Shi Chu suddenly changed color and said: "How can you say such a thing, young master?"

  Meizhuang himself also knew that he had misspoken, seeing him change color, he was somewhat regretful. So he relaxed his expression and said warmly: "I've been in a bad mood lately, I apologize for offending you. It's just that I'm just saying something casually, adding flowers to brocade is not remembered by anyone, but sending charcoal in the snow makes one appreciate the kindness deeply. You should understand, sir."

  Wen Shi Chu Zheng said: "Prescribing medicine and taking pulses is my duty, just like I quietly take medicine for the young master. I don't mind adding flowers to brocade, but I hope that neither the young master nor the noble princess will ever have a day when they need me to send charcoal in the snow."

  Wen Shi Chu's words were sincere, not only did Mei Zhuang's face change color, but I was also deeply moved. Although Wen Shi Chu is a bit reckless and doesn't know how to restrain himself, his feelings towards me and his sincerity towards Mei Zhuang are extremely rare in this cold and warm imperial harem.

  As expected, Mei Zhuang had nothing more to say and only said: "I hope that Lord Wen will treat me and my sister Gu as equals, take good care of us, and not differentiate between us."

  "Your Highness and the young master are both my masters, and also the people I must take good care of with all my heart. I will spare no effort to serve Your Highness and the young master wholeheartedly. Apart from this, there is nothing else in my mind."

  Meizhuang obviously didn't expect him to say that, and was taken aback for a moment. He replied coldly, "Caiyue, see the doctor off, Doctor, slow down."

  Wen Shi Chu and Cai Yue left, but Mei Zhuang seemed a bit dazed, just standing in the wind with his hands hanging down, not saying a word.

  I saw her like this, and my heart suddenly skipped a beat. Could it be...? But thinking again, Mei Zhuang's mind is only on overthrowing Empress Hua, and she is the most clear-headed person about what she wants and can get. How could she be so confused? I must have annoyed her by speaking out for Empress Hua's reinstatement. Thinking this way, my heart calmed down a bit. I adjusted my clothes and walked out from behind the flower tree, pretending to have just arrived, saying: "Sister, why are you standing in the wind? You'll catch a cold if you get blown by the wind."

  Mei Zhuang heard the words and raised her eyes, seeing it was me, her expression became somewhat icy, saying: "Little sister, why have you taken the trouble to come here today? Aren't you accompanying the Emperor?"

  I heard her say that, and I was anxious in my heart. I went forward, grasped her sleeve and said: "Sister, don't be angry first, I came today just for this matter, please listen to me."

  She slowly walked up the steps and said softly: "I'm a bit tired, I'll go in to rest. When I wake up, I still need to go to the Empress's palace, you can leave now."

  I became more anxious and grasped her hand, saying: "Sister, even if you're angry, please listen to me for a few words. Don't tell me that sister doesn't care about the affection of the past?"

  Meizhuang sighed and said, "Come in."

  In the courtyard, a fan that had just been used to cover her face was placed on the horizontal bed. Mei Zhuang and I sat together in silence. I thought of easing the atmosphere and said, "Sister, how is it that there isn't even a single person in the palace? Why aren't those slaves serving?"

  Meizhuang turned her head and looked elsewhere, saying: "Today is the day when summer clothes are distributed in the palace. I'll let them all go to the Nei Wu Fu to collect them." She smiled: "It can't be compared with your sister's household, where everyone rushes to go. Even Gonggong Jiang from the Nei Wu Fu personally came to deliver the clothes for the slaves."

  I had a somewhat embarrassed look on my face and said, "I know that sister is not concerned about the emperor's favor. So, sister is saying this to me, is it for the sake of Empress Hua's restoration?" I said: "I also have no choice, who would be willing to support the enemy who killed their own child to take office? Please think about it for me, sister. If it weren't for the fact that there was no other way out, why would I resort to this move? Sister can't tolerate it, but the suffering I've endured is not inferior to sister's. Can you tolerate it?"

  Mei Zhuang was visibly moved, and a bright light gathered in his dark eyes as he looked at me and asked, "What's the reason for that?"

  I was at a loss for words, can I tell her the reason? It involves state affairs of the previous dynasty, if Xuan Ling finds out that I leaked it, what will happen to me? And even if Mei Zhuang understands the whole story, can she really hold on until that day? If she loses her temper and blows up at any moment, who can stop her? And if Hua Fei finds out about the reason for his reinstatement and the root of the miscarriage and infertility, won't she hate Xuan Ling? With her explosive temper, I'm afraid the day when the Murong clan and Xuan Ling turn against each other is just around the corner.

  I pondered and hesitated, looking ahead and behind, but in the end I didn't dare to say it all out loud. I only said: "Sister, think thrice. If you don't regain your position as Empress today, I'm afraid that in the future, circumstances may change and she may still become empress. Even if sister gains the favor of the empress dowager today, I fear that tomorrow you will still be powerless to stop her."

  Meizhuang didn't understand, and her expression became somewhat impatient. She said coldly, "She is the Empress today, but tomorrow she will be a madam, isn't that even simpler?" I wanted to say more, but she waved her hand, stopping me from speaking. She said, "Alright, alright. You always have your reasons, and I have my own doubts. It's pointless to say any more." She paused for a moment, her expression sharp and icy as she suspected, "Could it be that you see the power of King Junan and the Murong clan is too strong, so you want to use the Empress to curry favor with them?"

  I heard this and felt an unspeakable sense of grievance and sadness, calling out: "Sister, is this how you see me? I haven't forgotten how I lost my child back then!"

  Her eyebrows and eyes showed a somewhat unbearable expression, she wanted to stretch out her hand to hold mine and comfort me, but after hesitating for a moment, she still didn't reach out.

  Her eyes drifted slightly, and she said softly: "Huan'er. Since we were young, we've been together, I know I'm not as good as you, my appearance is also inferior, so I made up my mind to cultivate virtue and become a gentle and virtuous person. You excel in dance, I'll focus on qin skills, never inferior to yours. Later when we entered the palace together, you always supported me, even though the Emperor doesn't favor me now, I've never been jealous of you half a bit." She suddenly gazed at me intently, a faint smile appearing at the corner of her mouth: "But for some reason, looking at you now, I feel like there's a big difference between us. You have the Emperor's favor, Wen Taiyi's affection, your sister can often come to the palace to visit you, and your brother is also favored by the Emperor." Her voice grew softer, like a gentle breeze: "But me, I have nothing at all."

  She said so, and in an instant, both she and I fell silent.

  In front of the old pear tree, a profusion of fragrant flowers has bloomed, not disappointing the gentle spring light. It seems as if the entire tree has been transformed into crystal ice and jade. From afar, it appears like white mist suspended in mid-air. The spring light is so beautiful, the sky is clear and bright, the sun shines like gold, and the flowers are in full bloom. The oriole's song is clear and melodious, and when the swallows take flight, they disturb the wispy clouds drifting lazily across the sky, making even this radiant scene seem insignificant.

  Mei Zhuang, she is so lonely. Every sound, every look, every smile, every strand of hair, and every glance, all convey a sense of loneliness and desolation.

  I couldn't say a word. She sat so close to me, just like when we were kids, sitting together with our heads bent, folding paper boats and playing. The water was so clear back then, the same color as the sky. Mei Zhuang held my hand tightly and carefully put the paper boat into the water, saying: "Nai Nai said that if this boat floats far away in the water, we'll get married far away from each other; if it floats close by, we'll get married close to each other."

  I giggled and stretched out my hand to scratch her face, "Sister Mei isn't shy, thinking of marrying someone already."

  She didn't blush or get annoyed, but said: "Huan'er, our boats should be moored at the same distance. Later, we'll marry into one place, best if it's two brothers, then we can still be together every day like now."

  I also became serious and was serious for half a day, suddenly laughing: "Why marry someone else's brother, Brow sister marrying into my family to be my sister-in-law is fine."

  Mei Zhuang thought for half a day with a tilted head, but suddenly became dissatisfied again. "I married Zhen Gege, but you are going to marry someone else and still can't be together."

  Tears blurred my eyes, the scenes of childhood, vivid as if before my eyes, so vivid and unforgettable. But at this moment, Mei Zhuang is in front of me, yet I feel that I am farther away from her than ever before, a distance we have never had before.

  Spring is so good, but in my heart, I only feel a chill layer by layer. I sighed: "Sister, are you going to be separated from me?"

  After being quiet for half a day, Mei Zhuang shook her head and said: "There is no banquet in the world that does not disperse. There is no distinction between life and death." Her eyelids slowly fell, "You can go back now. If there's nothing else, don't come again."

  I helplessly turned my head and softly said: "Sister, one day you will understand me."

  Mei Zhuang looked up at the sky and sighed: "Perhaps. I understand too much, but there's also too much that I don't understand."

  My heart is bitter and hard to express, as if I had been chewing on a piece of yellow lotus root in my mouth, so bitter that the tip of my tongue was numb.

  I stood up numbly and walked to the door, thinking of something. Although it was presumptuous, but no one else would say it to her except me, so I turned around and said: "Sister, forgive my garrulousness. In this palace, there are some emotions that should not exist. For example, feelings for other men."

  Meizhuang heard this and her eyelids twitched, as if scorched by a spark. She looked me up and down deliberately. She laughed silently, "I'm not stupid, nor am I muddle-headed! Save these words to advise your wife, Doctor Wen. To me, you're just wasting your breath."

  Meizhuang's words were loud and clear, and I felt relieved in my heart. I said, "So it's best to do so. Sister doesn't like me coming to disturb her, so little sister can wait until the day of success before coming again."

  She turned around and left me with a cold back, never looking back again.

  I walked out of the Cui Huatang with a heavy heart, my skirt trailing over the piles of fallen pear blossoms, leaving behind a trail of tears. I slowly stepped out of this place, where I would not be able to return for a long time.

  The gate of Qiu Tang behind me creaked softly and closed. I couldn't bear it anymore, and tears flowed down my face.

  Note: (1) Yang Guifei had three sisters, all of whom were national beauties and were also summoned to the palace, where they were enfeoffed as the Lady of Korea, the Lady of Kuai, and the Lady of Qin. Each month, they received a gift of 100,000 coins for cosmetics. The Lady of Kuai was ranked third among them, but she was naturally beautiful and did not need to use cosmetics. Du Fu's poem "The Lady of Kuai" says: "The Lady of Kuai followed the emperor's thoughts, riding her horse into the golden gate at dawn. She disdained using cosmetics to enhance her complexion, lightly brushing her eyebrows as she attended the emperor."

  (2) Tang Xuanzong's poem "Good Times"