Julian had been expecting any number of secrets.

  The troll was powerful enough to establish portals in every single kingdon from here to the southern sea. The window beside her couch overlooked that very ocean.

  She could have admitted to any ability or skill and he wouldn’t have been surprised.

  But he wasn’t expecting this.

  Anxiety twisted his heart and crept into his voice. “How long?”

  “Five years.” She said, standing straight and holding her ground. His worst fears dissipated as fast as they’d come.

  “Five years?” Julian approached her.

  She nodded and he lifted both hands and gripped her arms, leaning down and burying his face in her neck. “Then that’s fine. Gods, Gerda, don’t scare me like that.”

  She stiffened. “I literally woke up in this body, Julian. What do you mean it’s fine?”

  “You are still the troll I met and fell in love with.” He kissed her shoulder and then pulled back, looking in her eyes. “If Life and Death mixed up your soul in revival, then you might have come back in the wrong body. It’s the stuff of legends but it’s not unheard of with inexperienced necromancy–”

  “I’m not from Valaria.” She cut him off. “I’m not even from this world.”

  He kissed her nose. “Which explains your strange manners of speech.”

  “I’m being serious Julian.” Gerda put out both hands and pushed against his chest, forcing him back.

  “So am I.” He replied. His hands slid down her arms until he scooped up both of her hands in his and squeezed them reassuringly.

  “You don’t sound like it.” She accused.

  “Gerda–” He stopped, “Is that how you want to be called?”

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  “...Yes.”

  “Gerda,” He restarted, “I’m not a fool. I’ve been with you night and day for weeks. Do you think I haven’t noticed you make food that I’ve never even heard of before, and talk about things that don’t exist? For a while I thought that you might’ve journeyed here through the Sea of Monsters, or found some lost bridge portal—”

  Julian stopped, his blood going cold.

  “The bridge in the north.” He said softly. “Our paths don’t split at the dungeon— they split at the bridge your looking for.”

  She held his gaze, “I have a chance to go home.”

  Julian dropped her hands and took a step back. She was so sure. So ready to leave.

  “What is waiting for you there?” He asked, all emotion leaving his voice. It was hard to even speak, and his words were harsher than he’d intended. “A family? Your violent ex-husband?”

  Despite his earlier claims, he felt like a fool.

  “Actually, that was something Gerda and I both had in common.” She smiled tightly. “But no, he isn’t waiting for me. No one is.”

  “Then why?”

  “Because I don’t belong here.” She said, and finally her gaze faltered, looking down.

  “You don’t believe that.” He stated.

  “Julian, I have to at least try.” She waved around them. “I arrived here with nothing and knowing no one. It was all I had to keep me going for a long time… and it’s so close.”

  The words were a mirror to his own soul, and he hated it.

  How long had he spent, against the wishes of his loved ones, throwing himself into levelling up? Into searching the north? Into a single-minded task that was his reason for living...

  When he latched on to the desire for strength enough to protect his family, he forced his family at a distance to do it.

  And Gerda had been trying to keep that distance with him from the first day.

  “Alright.” He said, emptiness settling into his heart. He forced a smile. “I’ll escort you to your bridge. As promised.”

  “Julian–”

  “And you’ll show me to my dungeon.” He spoke over her, not sure he could make this choice again if he didn’t say it now. He couldn’t even look at her, turning to face the kitchen window overlooking an icy blizzard. “And we can let Fate decide.”

  Green arms wrapped around his stomach. Julian’s black hands hesitated only a second before settling over hers. She pressed her face into his back. “I’m sorry… and thank you.”

  They stood there for a while, quietly.

  The tea on the table had long grown cold.