It was always a sight to see seven feet of woman on the move, her long hair whipping behind her. While she probably imagined herself as going on a light jog, to me it might as well have been a full-on sprint.

  At least this time it wasn't me she was bearing down on, waving a massive axe around and sporting a bloodthirsty grin.

  Still, seven feet of woman bearing down on anyone wasn't exactly being inconspicuous, and the Thalmor reacted accordingly. I just wasn't expecting the sheer amount of magicka around them, pressing against me almost physically.

  Thankfully, Skadi had already slowed to a walk, crossing her arms. "What's she done that requires a gag and chains?" Her tone could have almost seemed friendly.

  Also, that was probably putting it lightly. It was a wonder the tiny lizard girl could even walk with how many chains were wrapped around her dark blue scales. There were what looked like patches of obsidian as well.

  "That is not your concern," one of them said, the one in just the black-and-gold robes. The other one, slimmer, had what looked like armor made of gold and glass under her robes, her alien (and vividly green) eyes narrowed. "All you need to be aware of is that we have the authority to question her."

  They were also both taller than me, which, you know, didn't bother me one bit. No siree.

  "I think I have the right to ask certain questions," Skadi shot back with what could only be called a shit-eating grin.

  Yeah, definitely picking a fight, and they felt it as well if the pressure of magicka noticeably increasing was anything to go by. What I felt from Anthony couldn't hold a candle to it.

  Now that I thought about it, what if there was a limit as to how much magicka I could eat? And how was I even going to explain it to her after?

  Yeah, I forgot to mention it, but I eat magicka to hide the fact that I am some kind of abomination. Yep, totally normal, nothing to see here…

  The golden elf guy rudely interrupted my internal monologue. "Looks can be deceiving." He then said something in another language to his partner, and even under the current circumstances I thought it was a beautiful one, smooth and melodic.

  "Don't I know it," Skadi shot back. "For all you adorn yourselves in the finest—"

  Her axe moved so fast that I could swear it blurred, and the only reason the guy wasn't short a head is because he reacted just as the edge touched his neck, his skin smoothing out into something metallic.

  "—you're nothing but bandits in the end," Skadi finished. Then she laughed like she had actually lost it. "Fun."

  As she proceeded to kick him a ways away I decided that I was going to have words with her about her definition of fun after—

  I had raised my hands just in time, placing a ward as my heart beat like a drum. If not for it, the shimmering thing that bounced off of her would have taken my head off.

  Lesson learned. Don't monologue like a moron.

  His partner gave a very feminine sigh as she retrieved her sword, a thing made of what looked like glass. She seemed so unbothered about it all that I hesitated. Well, that and the fact that she was standing right next to the frightened Argonian girl pulling at her chains.

  And seeing as I had no idea if any Daedra I conjured would actually listen to me…

  The squawking laughter drew her eyes. They then glanced back at me like she was asking what the fuck that was supposed to be, at least until it shambled at her, reaching out with its many limbs.

  …Only for it to get beheaded and fall apart in one (admittedly graceful) swipe of her anime bullshit sword.

  "A Daedra conjurer and a mad Nord," she whispered softly, giving the Argonian girl's chains a tug. "Are you friends of this—"

  There was a thunderous crash following a flash of lightning ahead of us, the air sparking dangerously. And looking up, I saw fat black clouds circling like sharks in the sky.

  I at least tried to take advantage of it by smushing together as much as I could and lobbing it at her. In retrospect, I probably should have expected her to do some more anime bullshit like deflecting it with her sword. Why not, right?

  I was wondering what to do now when Skadi had come back to ram into her like a bull, Anime Girl and all her anime bullshit being sent flying into the trees.

  "I think I made him upset. I'll let you take care of him."

  Not even listening to my sudden sound of protest, she stalked after Anime Girl back into the woods.

  And, like clockwork, the guy came storming back onto the scene, the metal around his left cheek chipped. With a surprising amount of bravery, I put myself between him and the tiny lizard girl dragging herself and her chains into the woods as well.

  Having learned that thinking wasn't a free action, I didn't think.

  He cursed at me (in a weird song-like manner) as he raised something around himself to blunt my assault, and I soon realized that unlike Anthony, he could do more than one thing at a time.

  I abandoned my attack as an ungodly amount of lightning threatened to turn me into a shadow on the ground. The problem was that I didn't have a clue how to stop whatever he was doing with the black clouds, and then my ward—

  —on a stick, that fucking hurt. The lightning burnt right through my new furs and etched branch-like burns into my skin. I put up more and more wards, feeling more hollow for each one.

  A blind man could see that it was quickly beginning to look untenable. I doubted I could even reach for a potion like this.

  The color soon went out of the world, my heart stopped beating, I stopped breathing. All that was left was magicka… so much magicka. And I was so hungry.

  The clouds above were the farthest thing from black now, and I opened my mouth wide. There was so much magicka that I felt myself put back together almost instantly.

  It was a jarring experience, but at least I wasn't the only one having a bad day. The guy cursed at me again, horror etched into his alien features, but he didn't try and crawl into a corner like Anthony. No, he just threw more of that shimmering shit at me, and he was really fucking good at aiming it.

  I ran at him for lack of anything better to do, all while trying to keep myself in one piece. I was already feeling half a stick again when I tried to stick my axe in him. Which, you know, did fuck-all seeing as he was made of metal now.

  Then his eyes lit up like a bonfire and he breathed fire at me like a dragon reject. I was cooking even through all the wards I put up, and all the magicka I had replenished by snacking on clouds was quickly vanishing.

  Here we go again…

  Reduced to a spectator again, I was unable to stop him from getting away. At least until I noticed something important. His robes… they had magicka in them.

  My hunger kept me going, kept me focused. I saw his surprise as I grabbed a hold of his seemingly rainbow robes and shoved them down… something.

  And it was more than just his robes. There was so much magicka on and inside of him, his blood and flesh more rainbow than red. I was still hungry.

  So very hungry…

  I followed the example of my monster, my hands now equally monstrous as I dragged him to the ground and tore him apart. It was like cracking open a pi?ata.

  I stood when I had my fill, smacking my lips. I was stuffed.

  That's about the time sanity returned to me, leaving me staring down at an empty-eyed corpse. It looked like a fucking wild animal had a go at him.

  It wasn't the first time I'd killed here either, but it sure as shit was the first time I ate a man. Even if he wasn't strictly human.

  I tried to reason to myself that it was magicka I ate, but it was kind of hard with his blood still dripping from my lips. This was some seriously messed up shit.

  The sounds of fighting finally registered and I looked up to see those two still duking it out. Anime Girl must have figured out anime physics as well since she was looking more like a vaguely humanoid blur than anything else.

  Somehow Skadi still kept up with her, but her axe was slowly being worn down.

  If not for me still tasting a funky mix of blood and blue raspberry, I might have found it funny when they both stopped to stare at what was left of him. That led to Anime Girl deciding to retreat, at least until a very angry Argonian girl jumped out of the bushes and sunk her very sharp teeth into her golden neck.

  It still didn't even break her skin, but her suddenly awkward position did allow Skadi to go ham, chipping away chunks of it. I was still watching it all in a daze when Anime Girl flicked her wrist too fast for me to follow, her sword like a missile as it slid right into Skadi's belly.

  Taking advantage of her surprise to pull the angry lizard off of her, Anime Girl took off in a sprint so fast she could probably make Usain Bolt cry tears of jealousy.

  I made it to Skadi, but she just laughed it off. "Take a shot. Maybe you'll get lucky."

  Looking down Anime Girl's sprinting form, I carved as much false lightning as I could into a vaguely spear-like shape and 'threw' it at her. She didn't have her sword to deflect it this time, but then she… yeah, she just hopped like a ballerina over it. I should have guessed.

  I could barely make her out in the distance now, so that was that.

  I felt more mentally exhausted than physically, but I still had to help a certain triggerhappy dragon with a sword lodged in her gut, something which I wasn't even sure I could do? The one and only spell I knew would go under basic bitch in the dictionary.

  "Don't think it hit anything important. Just have to take it out and wash a potion down." She made eyes at me then. "Though I won't say no to my man running his hands all over me either."

  The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

  I gave her an exasperated sigh before I noticed the Argonian girl watching us nervously.

  Her eyes would have been two black holes if not for the shock of blue at the center of them like burning coals. And she also had sleek black hair that tumbled to her shoulders, which was… I wasn't sure if Argonians even had hair?

  I turned back to Skadi as she slowly pulled the anime bullshit sword from her belly, red blood slipping out of her freely. Lighting my hands up, I placed them on either side of her, hollowing myself out to heal her. Though did she have to look at me and moan like that?

  She fell back on the grass and dirt with a sigh after I finished. "They might be bastards, but they sure know how to fight."

  "You do this often?" I snarked. I really should stop being surprised at her antics.

  "Not the first time I had a scuffle with them." She glanced behind me at the corpse I knew was there. "First time making them run off with their tail between their legs though. That monster of yours had fun?"

  Yeah. Totally not me, myself and I. I at least tried not to look suspicious.

  A small voice came to my rescue. "Sorry for… causing trouble…"

  Skadi snorted. "As if I wouldn't have picked a fight anyway. Though you Argonians don't normally pay any heed to Talos or any of the Divines…" The question hung in the air.

  "They didn't… didn't say why..." It didn't seem like she was used to speaking whatever language we were speaking right now.

  "I'm Russ," I blatantly lied.

  "Skadi." She popped back up after introducing herself, stretching left and right. Then she uncorked one of her very red potions and drank it dry. "Good as new."

  "Bright-Like-Dawn," she returned just as quietly.

  Well, it fit her. "We were heading to Whiterun if you want to come with."

  She nodded as I downed one of my potions, the taste of glue and soap definitely growing on me.

  Skadi, ever the murderhobo, had went to poke around the golden elf guy's corpse for anything worth taking. Seeing as I ate everything enchanted on him, all she found was some septims and 'glaessins' as she called Aldmeri Dominion currency.

  The face she made at them was cute.

  Also, I took the anime bullshit sword for myself. It weighed almost nothing and was as sharp as anything I've ever seen.

  It was kind of grim leaving a corpse on the road, but neither Skadi nor Bright-Like-Dawn had any interest burying him, maybe unsurprisingly.

  The Argonian girl happily accepted some of our food when we made camp for the night, tearing through the tough jerky like it was butter with her teeth. That's about when it became quickly apparent that Skadi had no intention of stopping our nightly activities.

  The insatiable dragon of a Nord at least had the decency to drag me away somewhere quiet before doing her very best to turn my hips to dust. Though maybe not far enough if the nervous embarrassment radiating from the tiny lizard girl when we returned was any indication.

  At least, that's what it looked like. It was hard to say with how alien she still seemed to me.

  I did notice the burning center of her eyes were brighter at night, and even her scales faintly glowed.

  Turning all the more embarrassed when Skadi asked if she wanted to cuddle up with us under my cloak as the wind picked up again, she hesitantly agreed. Which is where I noticed just how warm she was. Aren't reptiles supposed to be cold-blooded?

  Though seeing as she was also soft and squishy, maybe I shouldn't assume.

  Skadi being as greedy as a dragon, she soon hugged the very confused Argonian girl to her chest. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I had been replaced!

  Granted, she had already insisted I play the big spoon every night for some reason, so not much really changed. It didn't hurt that she was also soft and squishy in all the right places.

  In the morning after another long night of staring at a tower, we scarfed down some breakfast and talked about this and that. Bright-Like-Dawn even shared something of Black Marsh, though she admitted she was something of a hermit and lived on her own.

  Also, she had a rather funny reaction when we mentioned dragons as being the reason we were headed to Whiterun.

  We weren't far from it now, and when we did finally see it, it followed the same pattern as Helgen and Riverwood had. It sprawled across the hilly plains, surrounded on all sides by high walls and farmland.

  It was around that time that the roads began crowding with more and more people.

  "I've not been in Whiterun in a year or two," Skadi admitted. "At least the Thalmor shouldn't have a nice welcome prepared for us. Jarl Balgruuf had them barred from the city last I heard."

  She always had a look like she swallowed a lemon whenever the whole civil war came up, so I touched a hand to her arm.

  "Have you figured out why you felt drawn here?" I asked by way of distraction.

  "Perhaps," she murmured. "Something tells me we'll soon find out."

  There wasn't any giant making a mess of things that we found, but then the roads were also crawling with people, many of them armed, so maybe that shouldn't surprise me.

  The guards at the gates gave our company a funny look, but that was it. As we entered, Skadi's eyes fell on Dragonsreach, still seated high above the sprawling cityscape.

  "I only hope the jarl will be receptive to our story," she commented.

  Bright-Like-Dawn meanwhile was trying to stare at everything all at once, her claws pulling at her scales nervously as we both followed after Skadi. The woman-shaped dragon was something like a bulldozer when we were dealing with crowds.

  We passed a few sights familiar to me on the way, like Jorrvaskr seated on its own hill and the ruin of a hulking tree beneath it, but Skadi's inhuman pace wasn't leaving much time for sightseeing.

  When we reached the steps leading up to Dragonsreach, she was sporting a wistful smile. "It's almost like High Hrothgar, if much smaller." Then she bounded up the steps with ease, leaving us to follow again.

  Honestly, it's a wonder she could move that quickly with that dumptruck of an ass…

  Skadi was already speaking with one of the guards when we reached the top. I was surprised I wasn't out of breath. That many steps would have murdered me once upon a time.

  The guard led us before who could only be Jarl Balgruuf himself. He was much more impressive in the flesh, I decided.

  "Well met, Skadi of Ivarstead. I hear you have news from Helgen?"

  "I do. I only hope you will not dismiss them. The World Eater has returned, and he had left it a ruin last we saw."

  Well, she was certainly blunt. There were gasps and murmurs at her words.

  "So it is true…" the jal muttered. "We had heard rumors of a dragon black as night tearing through the sky, but there has been no word of where it went. No word until now…"

  "I saw him with my own eyes. I saw his hatred and malice as he split the sky asunder."

  She really had a way with words when she wanted to.

  Jarl Balgruuf looked like he had just eaten an entire plate of lemons when he turned to the woman to our left, with smoky gray skin and red eyes. Also pointy ears. Dunmer. "Irileth, send a detachment of the guard to Riverwood." A weasel of a man to our right tried to talk him out of it. "I know, Proventus, but what choice do we have? Damn Siddgeir if he complains."

  "It will be done," she answered, stalking away.

  "I owe you three a debt." The guy's eyes looked between us, and I had to bite back the laugh as Bright-Like-Dawn mumbled a funny 'Me?'

  "It was nothing but a Nord's duty," Skadi replied.

  There was something nostalgic in his eyes at her words. "Still, sit, eat, be merry. Dragonsreach is yours for as long as you will have it. I only ask that you hear me out on the morrow. I promise it is important."

  I had a pretty good idea of what that was. Bleak Falls Barrow.

  We shared a few glances before we nodded, and he smiled. "Then I shall leave you to it." He soon vanished into one of the rooms on the side.

  Bright-Like-Dawn and I had moved to the table that had food that wasn't dry and caked in salt when I noticed Skadi going out on the terrace overlooking the great outdoors. I knew she had a healthy appetite, so there was no way she wasn't hungry.

  I quickly grabbed something that looked sweet before following after her, where I found her staring at the sunset. "A sweetroll for your thoughts?"

  She turned around, looking down at my offering. "That's not a sweetroll, Russ."

  I looked at it, eyes narrowed. "It's not?"

  "It's got berries in it, you silly man." She still took a bite before offering me a taste. Yeah, it was more sour than sweet. Then she leaned down to kiss me. "Thank you."

  "You know, if something's bothering you…" I hinted.

  Those starkly blue eyes of hers watched me a moment before she sighed. "It's this war… and now the World Eater has returned as well. And the Thalmor…" There was that face again. "Will there even be a Skyrim in ten years?"

  These weren't questions with easy answers. Maybe I could tell her she was destined to kick Alduin's ass, but after that all I had was a certain someone's LSD-fueled ramblings, and I sure as shit wasn't telling her the Thalmor might similarly be destined to succeed.

  Instead I just kept mum as she played with my hair. It was the smarter thing to do.

  "Even you, Russ. At times it's hard to place you, a certain uncertainty that maybe I enjoyed more than I should have for how new it was to me." Her eyes searched for something. "Other times you feel like a half remembered dream." She sighed, looking embarrassed for her words. "I am not making any sense, am I?"

  Well, shit.